Anticipation
by spagtscully
Summary: From the beginning, the buildup of Jack and Ianto's relationship. Dare Jack say…anticipation is one of the finer things in life…
1. Chapter 1 You're not ready

**Title:** Anticipation 1/?  
**Author:** Jaybird023  
**Genre:** Slight Angst, smut, fluff, Episode Related.  
**Rating:** M  
**Pairings:** Jack/Ianto  
**Summary:** From the beginning, the buildup of Jack and Ianto's relationship. Dare Jack say…anticipation is one of the finer things in life…  
**Status:** WIP?  
**Word Count:** 2,259 (so far)  
**Warnings:** Masturbation, swearing, graphic thoughts of sex.  
**Comments:** _I need a little help here. I have an excellent idea of where I want to take this story. Problem is, I'm from the USA and I'm rubbish at British words. I'm trying to keep them somewhat in character. Anyone willing to help me make sure I don't make Ianto and everyone else (but Jack for the most part) sound American? Should I even continue?  
_

Chapter 1 – You're not ready…

Regardless of what the young man thought, Jack wasn't going to try to ravish him the day they started working together. He'd been alive too long not to relish the slow buildup that came with anticipation. He'd been alive too long not to have learnt how to tease and admire what was laid so gloriously before him.

So he waited for a while before he approached Ianto…waited until the young man got used to the new surroundings.

Waited until Ianto wasn't expecting it.

It took two weeks before he approached the young man. Two weeks of anticipation building up, and until Ianto had gotten slightly more complacent with his demeanor. He wasn't exactly relaxed, but he did seem more comfortable around the Hub. Two weeks of lust filled looks and innuendos that literally dripped with arousal.

Everyone had gone home. Everyone except Ianto and Jack himself. He'd pulled up the CCTV to see where Ianto was and found him buried in the archives. He was sitting at a desk reading over some of the paperwork that they had filed with a gauntlet. The gauntlet in question sat ominously by his hand as he rifled through the papers, his eyebrow raised at whatever he was reading.

Jack smiled slightly and shrugged his braces off his shoulders as he stood up. That man in his suits made Jack's blood boil in a way he hadn't felt for a very long time. Every time he looked at Ianto he wanted to draw the younger man out of his shell and make him lose some of that rigid composure. He wanted to drive Ianto to distraction. He wanted to run his hands over the younger man's body until he was writhing, gasping for air, and begging Jack to fuck him. He wanted to hear Ianto moan as he swallowed him down his throat and made him buck into the warm mouth. He wanted to hear Ianto screaming his name as he slammed into the younger man's body.

Jack glanced at the CCTV one more time before walking out the door and heading down to the archives.

Time to make what he wanted known to Ianto.

--------------

Ianto had spent the past two weeks trying to understand the things that happened at Torchwood 3. Between caring for Lisa, moving her to the hub, organizing the archives (_bloody hell were they a mess_), and expecting Jack Harkness to demand what had been so temptingly dangled before him when they met, he hadn't known how to relax.

He had been expecting Jack to demand something the day he started. Instead, the older man had introduced him around the Hub, given him a tour, gone over what he expected from Ianto, and then left him to his own devices. Ianto hadn't known what hit him. After the way he finally convinced Jack to hire him it was a total shock to his system.

After a couple of weeks he had started to think that maybe Jack hadn't hired him for the reasons he originally thought. Maybe he had actually hired him because he liked his coffee… or because he had shown he was capable in unusual situations. Maybe Jack had actually seen some potential in him.

Maybe he hadn't only hired him because he looked good in a suit. Maybe the sexual tension he had felt so abundantly when they had caught the pterodactyl had just been his reaction to Jacks supposed 51st century pheromones. Maybe he had been imagining everything about those days as a completely different experience.

Maybe, just maybe, he didn't actually want Ianto carnally?

Despite the fact that he loved Lisa, that thought made him shiver and cringe and with annoyance.

Ianto had never been attracted to a man before. The very fact that he was, had, at first, thrown him completely around the bend. He'd thought that maybe it was the adrenaline in his system when they were fighting the weevil. Then, when he had reached towards Captain Harkness to check his neck wound, the older man had pulled away. Ianto's gut had clenched with disappointed and it was only when the man was walking away and Ianto complimented his greatcoat that he'd figured out why.

That damn sexy greatcoat had clicked it all in his mind.

He'd wanted to rush up to the man walking away, shove the weevil to the side, and yank off everything but that coat. Bloody hell, it had been all he could think about. All thoughts of why he was trying to get the job in the first place had disappeared as he imagined running his hands over the body underneath.

It was probably a good thing that Captain Harkness had been walking away. He missed the moment, minutes afterward, when Ianto fell to his knees in shock.

Then the next morning as he confronted Jack outside the tourist office, Jack had been wearing that damned greatcoat again. Ianto had to focus for a second before he could shove the thoughts he was thinking to the back of his mind. He found himself briefly forgetting why he needed this job again. Instead he had forcefully held out a cup of coffee to the man in front of him. He found himself anxiously wanting to please Captain Harkness with the coffee that he offered to him. Nervously awaiting the man's reaction in a way that made his head lighten when he got the result he was anticipating.

This time he was picturing shoving Captain Harkness against the wall behind him. He could imagine using his tongue to lick around those luscious lips in order to get all traces of coffee. He could imagine pushing his tongue into the man's mouth roughly and tangling their tongues enough to taste the difference between the man and the bittersweet taste of the coffee, which he knew was good.

That thought had been shocking enough to remind him why he was there in the first place and trying to get his foot in the door, for all the wrong reasons. He felt he may have covered up that brief insanity, that douse of arousal, enough so that Captain Harkness didn't notice it.

He'd felt a rush of pleasure that Captain Harkness had researched him, feeling like he mattered to the man. Arguing with the captain had brought other aspects but his determined mind kept flickering through different scenarios of what he could do to Captain Harkness. His brain fucking with him by suggestively pointing out all the little niches and walls around that he could shove the older man in or against so he could feel that body flush with his.

And the mere action of pulling his arm to stop him from walking, of placing his hand against the chest in front of him? That had simply been his minds way of fighting back, his minds way of denying his capability of shoving those thoughts away. Even he knew it was nothing more than his body's way of giving in to the urge to touch some form of the captain.

Then, Captain Harkness was walking away from him _again_ and his mind scrambled to that bloody greatcoat _again_. "I _really_ like that coat."

Minutes later, finding himself leaning his body against the wall next to him and looking out at the bay, he'd finally shaken the desire that was still ripping through his groin. His mind being absolutely no fucking help when it suggested that _maybe tomorrow_ he could touch more of Captain Harkness. Maybe tomorrow he could actually run his hand down that arm and across that chest.

Then there was Captain Harkness yelling at him in the rain later that night and all his bloody mind could think of was shutting him up by shoving him against the Torchwood truck and rubbing up against his body until they both moaned and came, soaked from the rain. By this time he had grown used to the thoughts. His blood rushed south as he let his thoughts wander and Captain Harkness had threatened to wipe his memory. He'd chosen the suit because he knew he could cover up that arousal better then the damn jeans he'd been wearing the other times he'd seen Captain Harkness.

Christ, then Captain Harkness had fallen and Ianto had caught him…fallen right **on top** of Ianto. He lay there loving the adrenaline rush and laughing at the irony of the whole situation. Until his fucking mind had once again taken over and he was suddenly on top of Captain Harkness, rolling them away from the pterodactyl that was falling from the rafters. His lower mind had so helpfully suggested that if he just shifted his hips a little, then he could probably come just from this contact alone.

He'd damn near kissed the older man underneath his body, whose chin lifted slightly and whose harsh breath was hitting him softly in the face as Ianto leaned in slightly. The thought of coming, writhing on the body below him, while lying next to a knocked out pterodactyl, was enough to make him pull away. For some reason the thought of such an out of time animal, made Lisa come to the forefront of his mind again. Almost like he was associating this creature with the one he **supposedly** loved, the one that lay hooked up to machines back at his flat. One ahead of its time, one behind.

It was only as he was walking away, finally offered a job that he let it overwhelm him. He cried because he knew this wasn't what he had expected. He'd start this whole escapade in order to save Lisa, and yet every time he got around Captain Harkness, his body took over his thoughts. He was so fucking confused…so fucking annoyed.

He felt so fucking guilty.

Ever since he started at Torchwood 3, Ianto had woken up several times in the middle of the night, his cock hard against his stomach and aching, breathing heavily from the dreams that invaded his sleep. Dreams of Jack bloody Harkness. Dreams that showed him arching into the man's touch as he pressed their bodies together and closed the distance between them. Dreams of Jack not letting him pull away while they lay on the floor mere feet from the pterodactyl. The memory of Jack's scent when he was lying on top of him still taunted him in those moments of half awareness. His hand going down to his erection and squeezing, making him hunch over in the bed as he came suddenly, harshly, with Jacks name on his lips.

The mornings after those dreams he would go into the Hub and tend to Lisa. His eyes would close for a moment as he would find some way to give her extra attention, some way to make up for his betrayal. The extra attention getting more intricate as the dreams became more common.

"It's late." Jack said as leaned against one of the filing cabinets stacked in the archives.

The voice yanked Ianto out of his thoughts and he stood up suddenly, almost knocking the gauntlet over that sat beside his hand."Y…yes sir."

"Why are you still here?" Jack tilted his head as he asked the question, his blue eyes studying the young man before him.

Ianto caught his gaze and turned away suddenly at the depth of it. "I…I just wanted to finish up a few things before going home." _And I have to make sure my girlfriend isn't in any pain tonight. _Ianto continued with his thoughts as he turned back to the paperwork and shoved it in a folder.

Ianto felt Jacks hands on his shoulders and nearly jumped at the touch. His body reeled at the fact that he hadn't even heard the other man move towards him. How had he gotten behind him so suddenly and so quietly?

The hands tightened their grip slightly and released. Jack leaned into Iantos body and pressed up against him and his hands ran softly down the younger mans arms. Ianto shivered as he felt jacks breath ghost over his ear. "I know Ianto."

Ianto's mind seized up as he tried not to flinch. _Jack knew about Lisa? How?_

He closed his eyes, preparing for the man behind him to berate him, to cuff him, to do anything in retaliation. Instead his eyes flew back open as Jack pressed his body into Iantos. He could feel Jacks hardness pressing into arse, his breathing becoming shallower as the older man thrust against his body again.

"I know that you think about me. I know that your body is aching for mine." Jacks hands ran around Iantos waist as he tugged the younger man against him again. "I know what you thought when you started. I know what's been on your mind the past couple weeks."

Ianto tried not to shudder at the feel of Jacks body hard against him. He tried not to let his bloody mind take over his actions. Tried not to press back against the body behind, only realizing a moment too late that it already had. The sensation was so different from a woman's body, harder, rougher, yet he could feel his heart pounding in his chest.

Jack pulled away from him suddenly. He was walking away from Ianto before Ianto could comprehend the abrupt loss of body contact and the sensations crashing through him.

Jack was almost ten steps away when he spoke softly. Ianto still heard him clearly enough. "You're not ready yet." The words were almost a whisper.

--------------

TBC?


	2. Chapter 2 Teasing Touches

**Title:** Anticipation 2/?

**Comments:** _Wow. Thanks everyone for the amazing response. I figured quite a few people wanted me to continue, with all the notification emails I received…lol. Reviews could be helpful, but they are defiantly not required. (grin) Also, if someone wants to BETA, please let me know. I haven't written any slash before now and I'm flying somewhat blind. __No, I am not normally able to update this quickly, but it's almost like my muse is holding me hostage over the computer this weekend. __Remember, I did warn there was Slight Angst..._

Chapter 2 – Teasing Touches

The moment that Jack walked out of the archives, Ianto sank down in the chair of the desk and put his face in the palm of his hands. He was still trying to figure out what the hell had happened. His body was taut and he was so damn aroused that he could barely see straight.

He started to stand up, lost his equilibrium and fell back into the chair. Bloody fucking hell! He had never had this much of a problem with his balance. He had always been coordinated, even as a child. Yet one touch from Jack Harkness and he couldn't even stand up properly. He closed his eyes and focused on his breathing. He ran images of every horrible thing he could think of through his head.

Unfortunately, his body was just not agreeing with the calming techniques, something that always worked in the past. Instead after five minutes he was left staring under his palms at the front of his trousers. Not only were they somewhat tented obscenely but they were also ridiculously tight.

It took almost twenty minutes for Ianto to stand and walk out of the archives. He knew without a doubt that he couldn't go see Lisa, not after what had just happened. He could still feel Jack's body against his, ghostly apparitions running hands softly across his shoulders and down across his abdomen. He felt incredibly guilty as he walked out the door without a glance towards where Lisa was hidden. He was fairly certain she had enough pain medication. She should be completely knocked out by this point.

He did however, glance towards Jack's office, only to find it completely empty. He groaned loudly thinking Jack must have finally went home.

'_Right bastard he is'_ Ianto thought to himself. Of course Jack would completely fluster Ianto and then take off to god knows where.

Probably went out to find some bloke or totty to shag.

---------------

Jack watched Ianto through the CCTV as he sat down in the archives. He grinned when he saw Ianto try to stand and collapse back into his chair. Had Ianto seen this grin he might have been slightly frightened. It was feral, full of all the lust Jack had for the younger man. His eyes were dark as he waited for Ianto to move again.

He grew slightly worried after Ianto didn't move for nearly twenty minutes. He was just about to get up and go finish what he'd started when Ianto suddenly stood from his chair and walked out of the archives. Jack sighed with relief and laughed out loud.

He had gotten to Ianto, exactly what he wanted. He'd broken into a part of the young man that was previously untouchable. He knew the next few months were going to be fun, not only for him, but Ianto as well.

Jack opened his hidey hole and sank down to the bed laying in it before Ianto got to the main part of the Hub. He didn't want Ianto to know that he had been watching him. Anticipation was better when served fresh and steaming hot. By the time Jack took Ianto, the other man wouldn't know what had hit him. He would be screaming for Jack, begging him in those succulent welsh tones to just '_hurry up and fuck him already'._

Jack waited until he heard the cog door close and stripped down so he could get a few hours rest. He couldn't help but smile again as he thought of Ianto going home to his flat. Ianto would probably go home and do nothing but think of Captain Jack Harkness.

Just the way Jack wanted it.

---------------

Ianto had no idea what he was doing. He sat on the edge of his bed and looked around the bare room that served as his bedroom. He still hadn't gotten around to adding any personal touches, something that would make his sister and mum wonder exactly what was wrong with him, if he'd still talked to them on a regular basis.

He began to slowly pull off his clothes to ready himself for another restless night of sleep. Not only was he going to have to deal with his guilt over the whole Lisa situation, but now he was certain his dreams of Jack were going to be even more detailed and frustrating.

He started to lie down and thought better of it. Maybe if he took a shower he could get the feel of Jack's hands to stop ghosting over his body. The hot water, however limited it was, would work out the tension in his shoulders and ease the frustration that kept pooling low in his abdomen whenever he thought of Jacks body pressed flush against his back.

As he adjusted the temperature of the water his mind kept going back to the last words that Jack had spoken to him before walking out on him tonight. He couldn't figure out what Jack had meant about him not '_being ready'_. If he were any more ready for something to happen with Jack he'd be begging him to shag him.

As the warm water sluiced down his body, he groaned aloud when he thought he may have touched on the answer with a simple casual thought. That _**might**__ be _exactly what Jack wanted. He leaned his forehead against the wall, letting the water wash down over his hair and trail down his back. He was tempted to start pounding his head against the wall. If Jack was waiting for Ianto to beg, he was never going to get it. Ianto was just not the type to allow himself to be put in that position.

'C_ouldn't you just see it'_ his subconscious mind very unhelpfully chimed in. The voice, of course, sounding just like Jack. The next groan that escaped his body had nothing to do with realizations. He _**could**_ see it…that was the problem. He could see falling to knees in front of Jack and asking the man to take him. Take him and make him his. Flashes of being thrown against the wall of Jacks office as Jack gripped his body tightly and thrust against him.

No the new groan that escaped again was for an entirely different reason. He was suddenly very aroused and very erect. He glared down at his cock as if it was offending him in some odd fashion.

Those phantom fingers that he had been feeling since Jack had touched him earlier ghosted over his abdomen again. This time, however, they didn't stop there. He could feel fingers trailing up and down his length before wrapping around his cock and pulling gently. He suddenly arched forward, into a hand that wasn't even there.

The phantom feeling of the hand was just not enough to ease the desire that was crashing through him like a speeding bullet. Ianto ran one of his hands down his chest and gripped his erection in his palm. He moved his hand slowly up and down, spreading the precome around the head with his thumb and adding a small twist to his grip as his hand came back to the base. He placed his other hand lightly on his shoulder and ran it down his arm, trying to recreate the touch that had started this whole mess earlier.

He could feel his spine tingling as he slammed his eyes shut and the hand that he had been running down his arm slammed against the wall. He could almost smell Jack in the shower with him…could almost feel as the man ran his hands deliciously over every part of his body within reach. He could actually hear Jack encouraging him in the same ear he had whispered harshly into in the archives.

"_That's it Ianto. Make yourself come for me." _He felt Jack's phantom mouth nip at the back of his neck and it was almost enough to send him spiraling out of control.

"_Your body flushes so prettily when you're like this_." The voice whispered heavily. "_Is this what you're going to look like when I'm buried in your ass? Are you going to be crying out for me to fuck you harder? Faster?" _That phantom mouth nipped at his ear this time, teeth gripping the lobe and tugging gently. "_Are you going to scream my name when I twist my hips as I drive into you and find that spot inside you? When your body clenches around my cock as I moan and push as deep inside you as possible? Are you going to grip my ass with your legs wrapped around me as I come deep inside you?" _

Ianto felt those phantom hands again, this time running over his arse and gripping each cheek lightly. His body seized up as he came, crying out Jacks name in a litany of jumbled groans and pleasure induced delirium. He sank into the tub still reeling from phantom feel of Jack's hands and the sound of his voice ringing in his ears.

The shower suddenly seemed empty. The smell of Jack disappeared within moments of his collapse. He didn't even notice that the water had grown cold. Instead he bent his head and cried.

He was never going to be able to pull this off.

---------------

Jack smiled as he pulled the alien band from around his wrist. He had fully intended to get some rest, but the moment he lay down he'd remembered this wonderful, yet obviously dangerous, piece of technology that had fallen through the rift a few months before. He'd held onto it instead of archiving it because he'd wanted to test the practical applications of it.

If he'd known how easy it would be to invade someone's subconscious with the device he would've gotten himself in trouble with the wrist band long ago. It was originally meant to be a form of communication. However, he now knew that it definitely had its advantages as more than that.

There was something that was bothering him while he had inundated those whispers and touches into Ianto's subconscious. He could almost touch on the frustration that had nothing to do with Jack. Something was unsettling Ianto…something that he was keeping to himself. Unfortunately, it seemed the wrist band didn't allow for the reading of all thoughts, it only allowed the wearer to focus on thoughts that were about the wearer and implant thoughts of the wearer into the mind of another. Wearing it would allow the person to touch and speak, but didn't allow for all transmission to go the other way. Obviously it would work much better if both parties had a wristband. He'd have to make sure to archive the wristband. It could be severely dangerous in the wrong hands.

He would, however, hold onto it a little longer. Tonight's events would definitely require a few repeat performances. He'd just have to make sure Ianto didn't know about it.

Jack closed his eyes and settled down. He really wished that his hands had been able to feel the young flesh they had been ghosting over and that his mouth had been able to taste the skin he nipped at. But he would eventually find out on his own. When it came to Ianto Jones, he was going to get the full package. He only hoped he could handle the build-up. It wouldn't do if he didn't have the patience to wait for Ianto to come to him.

---------------


	3. Chapter 3 Waiting is the Hardest Part

AN: _Ok, the boys previously hijacked chapter two from me when I was half asleep that night. I so had not intended going there. Apparently they did not agree with me. I'm going with it though because it works really well for where I had planned to go. As always, constructive criticism and feedback/comments are highly appreciated! Also, if you're willing to BETA this story let me know!  
_

Chapter 3 – Waiting is the Hardest Part

Ianto was going to go insane if Jack teased him any longer. It had been nearly three weeks since Jack had approached him in archives. Three weeks in which he'd had to put up with 'accidental' touches and quite deliberate innuendos.

Three weeks in which his guilt and denial continued to grow even deeper. He just didn't know which one was getting worse. And to top it all off, he wasn't sure if he felt more guilty for lying to Jack or for mentally cheating on Lisa. He was starting to discover that Jack caused a profound effect on him, more so then he would have ever imagined.

Sometimes being around Jack made him want to confess to sins he didn't even remember having. He would turn around and find Jack looking at him, one of those half smirks flaunting over his lips, and he would have to fight the urge to kiss that smirk right off his lips. He knew he was drowning. It wouldn't take long with the trouble he was putting himself in. Eventually it would get deep enough to kill him. Hell if Jack ever found out about Lisa he was certain he wouldn't survive it. It would be justifiable homicide if Jack found out and ended up shooting him with that Webley he loved so much.

Still, he was often able to remind himself that he really did love Lisa. She was the whole reason he was in this position. He would keep staying here, if only to assure that he had a place to help her. He just ignored the small part of him that kept saying that he was getting more and more pleasure each time Jack made some sort of advance towards him.

He hoped like hell he could make it through this whole façade.

That's when Gwen Cooper came into the picture. Ianto couldn't figure out what to be more annoyed with…the fact that Jack was obviously interested in Gwen, or the fact that it bothered him at all.

Ianto knew the team was watching Gwen on the CCTV the entire time she was standing outside. Jack had told everyone to be ready for when she showed up. Then he'd sent a message to Ianto through email telling him to make sure he brought arse and his suit downstairs to the workstations in time for the introductions.

That bloody voice in the back of his mind had taken over his actions again when he'd typed up a quick reply and sent it before he could think it through.

_ 'Well, as it would be hard for me to leave my arse behind, only the suit is actually optional.' _

The resounding email he received back had only said '_Later_' with a bunch of smilies after it.

Jack could be so like a little kid sometimes.

Ianto was still somewhat laughing at the email when Gwen walked into reception. He had a hard time forcing the smile from his face as he opened the door for her.

He wouldn't be smiling later. In fact, he would be having a hard time not coming in his pants. But he didn't know that yet.

----------------

Ianto hadn't seen Jack when he walked up behind him. It looked like he was just getting ready to leave. He had just pulled off his suit coat and placed it next to everything he was taking home. Jack stood behind him and flicked the light back on. He saw Ianto jump at the sudden glare that surrounded the stool and computer he was sitting at and about to stand up from. Jack placed his hands on Ianto's shoulders to stop him from moving.

"Did you do it?" Jack asked, his mind on the task at hand, and trying to ignore the feel of the Ianto's muscular shoulders under his hands. Those suits hid a body he was just dying to run his hands over. And nothing was quite like it when he thought of his palms running over Ianto's naked skin.

"No sir, I thought I'd let her keep the writings and have her remember everything. That way she can come back , this time with reinforcements." He turned his head and glared at Jack with a raise of his eyebrow, before turning back towards the computer.

Jack stared in shock at the back of Ianto's head for a moment. First with the email and now with the sarcasm. He hadn't been aware that Ianto could be so decadent.

Jack leaned over and ghosted his hands from Ianto's shoulders down his back. He stopped just short of Ianto ass, running his palms back and forth along his waist and leaned in to whisper against his ear. "I do believe we had an appointment Mr. Jones."

Ianto's body tensed for a moment before he laid-back into Jacks hands. Taking that as a good sign, Jack dipped his hands further and caressed the tight ass under his fingers. Christ, from the moment he'd met Ianto, he'd wanted to run his hands over that ass. Now he was going to enjoy it, for as long as he could. He squeezed each cheek lightly allowing himself stroke along the cleft, through the trousers covering it, before going back to just stroking his hands over it.

Jack stepped closer to Ianto's body, placing himself nearly flush against the Welshman's back. He had just enough room between their bodies to keep his hands caressing the body in front of him. Leaning forward, he ran his lips softly over the back of Ianto's neck. The smell of Ianto was something that he couldn't get over. After that time he'd invaded Ianto's shower, he felt he actually needed to taste the skin under his lips.

His lips nipped at the skin with his teeth, is tongue snaking out sooth the skin after each love bite was inflicted. Jack reached up and loosened Ianto's tie. He unbuttoned the top couple of buttons of Ianto's shirt and then moved the collar of Ianto's shirt aside and sucked hard on the hollow of his collarbone, or as much of it as he could reach. He ran his tongue over the mark that remained when he pulled away.

Jack felt Ianto lean back, panting and pressing further into the body behind him. Every time Jack nipped or skimmed his teeth over Ianto's neck, Ianto's body would shudder and his breathing would speed up. Jack trailed one of his hands up, moving the suit vest and shirts out of the way, before running his fingers between the skin of Ianto's back and the fabric covering it. Ianto shuddered and Jack smiled wickedly into the skin of Ianto's neck as he realized the young man was fighting against groans that wanted to come ripping out of his throat.

Although Ianto's body was wantonly pushing backwards towards the roaming fingers, his arms remained solidly and stiffly down each side of his body. Jack looked down to notice Ianto's hands gripping the stool he was sitting on. He was holding onto it so tightly that his knuckles had turned white with the effort. Leaving his hand stroking the skin of Ianto's back, Jack reluctantly pulled his other hand away from stroking Ianto's ass and moved it forward and running it up the young man's thigh, stopping just short of caressing the erection he knew to be waiting.

Ianto's body went rigid underneath Jacks hands as he gasped in a deep breath. Then his breathing all but stopped.

Jack pulled away from the young, albeit a bit reluctantly. He had been so sure that Ianto was going to give in to the sensations. He had been hoping that the young man would do what he needed him to. "Ianto, I…" He trailed off when he heard how hoarse his own voice was.

Clearing his throat he took a few steps back from Ianto. Ianto was sitting on his stool and breathing heavily again, his head hanging down. When Jack started to speak, Ianto turned to look at him, blue eyes clashed with blue, and Jack nearly shuddered at the look of unbridled lust and darkness encompassed in Ianto's eyes. It was almost enough to make him give in.

Almost.

Jack turned around and began to saunter away. He said in a very strained voice that almost sounded nothing like him, "You're still not ready, but you're certainly getting there."

----------------

Ianto watched as Jack walked away from him **_again_**. He wanted to stop him, wanted to stand up and walk after him. But there was something still holding him back. He'd thought if he'd let Jack know, let him see the answer in his eyes, Jack might just give in. Instead Jack had left him sitting there, so bloody turned on, that he was still seeing spots whenever he closed his eyes. His body was still shuddering from when Jack was touching and nibbling at his skin.

Ianto released his grip in the stool below him, only now realizing how sore his hands were. He opened and closed his hands into fists several times trying to get the feeling to return to them. He knew that Jack was enjoying this game, but he could've sworn that Jack had been almost as much affected by it as Ianto. He could've sworn that Jack's voice was nowhere near as confident as it normally was. For Jack that was a damn miracle. After all Captain Jack Harkness was not the type to become involved. Obviously since he had been able to walk away.

Ianto stumbled as he tried to stand up, for the second time in his life losing his balance, but just barely being able to stop himself from falling over. He body was so taut, his cock so hard, that it was nearly painful. He tried to regain his composure and failed miserably. He had no idea how he was going to see Lisa and make sure she was alright when his whole body was still humming from being touched, not just by someone who wasn't Lisa, but by _another_ man.

Ianto groaned and put his suit coat back on. He needed to go see Lisa. He absolutely had to. They had just started a new dose of pain meds and they weren't sure if they were going to work right yet. At least the coat covered up his indiscretion, since the bloody erection didn't want to seem to go away, no matter how much he thought of every disgusting and depraved thing he could think of.

Ianto walked out of the office and carefully checked around the hub to make sure no one was there or watching him. Jack seemed to have disappeared again, which by every right that he could think of was probably a good thing. He turned and headed down to the unused portion of the lower ground that was quickly becoming more of a torture for him than anything else.

As soon as he got close enough to Lisa room he heard her screams. His erection finally disappeared at almost record speed as he rushed in to find her writhing on the machine that was keeping her alive.


	4. Chapter 4 Dreams Vs Reality

**Warnings:** Masturbation, swearing, graphic sex. Very, extremely, exceedingly, light S&M warning. (_Seriously, I'm telling you, I wouldn't even mention it but I noticed it. It's not really that bad. There's no bondage or anything like that, but there is a sense of Master/Slave feel to it. )_

AN: _Thanks go to mama rocks for her quickly checking over and BETAing this to make sure I didn't sound too much like a fool by mixing up pants and trousers. Sigh...  
_

Chapter 4 - Dreams Versus Reality

Ianto closed his eyes in frustration as he entered his loft. He could feel those phantom hands ghosting over his skin again, but the guilt he was feeling at what had happened earlier was still running through him. While he had been fighting his lust for Jack, Lisa had been screaming for him…begging him to come to her.

The hands continued to ghost over him, only now he felt Jack's lips adding to the foray. Ianto growled out his frustration. At this point, he was either going completely round the bend or he was totally emotionally knackered. Either way he was quite ready to walk into Whitchurch Hospital and check himself in. Unfortunately, if he did that they'd probably want to keep him there permanently, when he started talking about what was making him this way in the first place.

Ianto sat down his heavily on his sofa, falling backwards and wishing that he could just keep going back. Maybe if the sofa sucked him far enough in, it would swallow him up and he wouldn't have to think about anything anymore. Maybe there he could find some form of peace.

He stood up suddenly and shook himself. That was no way to think. After everything that was going on, he had to keep Lisa at the forefront of his mind. She was the most important thing, and this thing with Jack, well that was strictly to help Lisa wasn't it?

_'Yeah Ianto, just keep telling yourself that. That'll make the irrationality go away.'_ His mind unhelpfully chimed in. _'Just like you keep blaming Jack's pheromones for the delusions of him being there and touching you when he's not.'_

He needed a better plan then hiding Lisa in the lower ground of Torchwood. That may have been the best option at the time, but it was starting to get a lot more complicated then he'd ever imagined. He just hadn't expected Jack to be so…well so _Jack_. It was the only word he could find to describe the man. There was no one else like him and unique seemed like to weak a word.

Unfortunately, he didn't have a lot of options. The only thing he could do was try to get Doctor Tanizaki there as soon as possible. The sooner he could get Lisa fixed, the sooner they could disappear.

Ianto groaned and gave up. He headed towards his bedroom, to hopefully get a little sleep.

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Jack pulled the wristband off his arm and looked at it in puzzlement. That was the fourth time he'd put it on that night and the first three tries hadn't worked. The wristband had failed to make a connection for some unknown reason. When it finally did make the connection, Ianto had been frustratingly ignoring the suggestions he'd been trying to send. To top everything off, Ianto _wasn't even _remotely turned on anymore. Whatever he had been doing in that time that Jack couldn't find him had turned him off completely to Jack's earlier ministrations.

Jack sighed and went to work on his computer. He'd have liked to have a little more fun with Ianto this evening, but it seemed the younger man was not going to give in. He started replying to some emails he'd been avoiding for the past week. Several from UNIT and a couple that Suzie had sent to him about the glove.

After about thirty minutes of this, he came across the email Ianto had sent to him earlier. He still remembered how shocked he'd been when he'd read that email. If he could've gone up to reception at that moment he would have. Ianto would have had a hard time resisting him with the mood he was in at the time. But they'd had too much to do with heading off Gwen Cooper. It was too bad he didn't have an opening in Torchwood. He would have loved to bring her onto the team.

Jack glanced down at the wristband then picked it up and studied it. He really should have put it in the archives but he loved adding a new spin to the seduction. After that first time, he hadn't really had a chance to delve too deeply into how it worked. He turned the band over in his hands and flipped it upside down. It was only as he flipped it over that he noticed the writing on the inside of the band. The writing looked vaguely familiar, but he couldn't figure out why. He'd definitely have to look into it.

In some part of the back of his mind, he knew he was ignoring one of the most important rules of Torchwood, the rule about never underestimating alien technology. But he was **really** starting to like Ianto's reactions to him. Most of the time those reactions were tremendously rampant and extremely lustful. It was so effortless to get a response from him. He was just waiting for the right response when he was actually touching the young man, rather than only when he was imparting those suggestions.

Jack looked between his computer and the wristband. If it was a decision between listening to Suzie ramble on about that glove she was getting addicted to and responding to more dull emails, or drawing Ianto a little further into him, he certainly knew which one he'd like to choose.

Grinning sinfully, he closed his eyes and put the wristband on. He could always respond to the emails later.

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_There was something going on, something different. Ianto found himself on his knees in the Hub and he had no idea how he got there. It had to be the Hub, it was quite obvious from the background noises. They were sounds that everyone gets used to, because they were always on. He only noticed it because he was new and he was still getting used to them._

_What he really couldn't figure out was why he was on his knees. He was in a very subservient position with his head down. Things were slightly out of focus, almost hazy around the edges. He could almost assume he was dreaming, but he could feel the hard cement floor beneath his knees._

_Slowly, still trying to comprehend what was going on, he tried to adjust to his surroundings. He was in Jack's office, he could see the desk out of the corner of his eye. He still had his head down though. It was almost as if he couldn't lift it, and even stating it that way wasn't quite right. He knew he could lift his head and look around, but there was some reasoning in the back of his mind that told him he needed to stay in this position._

_He **was** able to look at what he was wearing. That alone was enough to shock him. It wasn't in the way of much. Of course, it did make some sense, as it was pretty much what he'd been wearing to sleep in. However, he knew he would **never** show up at the hub wearing only his boxer briefs._

_"Ianto?" The voice was familiar enough to shock Ianto's system. Whatever force had been keeping him in position suddenly relaxed enough so he was finally able to raise his head._

_Jack was sitting in his desk chair, turned away from his computer, looking down at Ianto with a slightly shocked expression on his face._

_"Sir, I..." Ianto's voice trailed away in adjunct confusion._

_Something definitely wasn't right about this whole situation. Right now, at this very moment in time, he was looking at Jack and he wanted him. He wanted him so absolutely and so consummately that his mind had already come up with fifteen different ways to get Jack to remove his clothes ._

_Before he could stop himself, he leaned forward and ran his hands up Jacks thighs. His hands stopped just before they reached the apex of Jacks legs. He could see Jack's trousers grow tighter as he ran his hands upwards, see the erection grow before his very eyes. His mouth watered at the thought and that was enough to make him pause, to wonder what the bloody hell was going on._

_His mind and body, however, had other ideas. They didn't want to analyze the situation. His body definitely wanted to take advantage of it. He could feel his own cock growing hard, pushing heavily against the cotton briefs. His mind was spending time cleverly coming up with ideas that involved licking and nipping every part of Jack's body until the man was writhing below him._

_There was something else he was having a hard time understanding as well. Ianto leaned forward, in close proximity to Jack's body, and inhaled deeply. That was it. He could smell Jack's scent, more powerful and potent than normal. It was nearly aphrodisiacal. Suddenly he needed to smell more of Jack's body, needed to taste the flavor of his skin._

_Ianto leaned forward and nuzzled his face against Jack's cloth covered erection, the older man groaned and bucked up into Ianto's touch. Ianto could feel the soft cloth against his cheek and the hard cock encased within._

_"Ianto? What are you…?" Ianto leaned forward and nipped at the fabric encasing Jack's erection._

_"Oh hell…"Jack muttered as his hips bucked up again._

_Ianto moaned with appreciation, his hips thrusting forward every time Jack's did. Ianto hands began to move frantically as he grabbed at the front of Jack's trousers, scrabbling to undo the catch._

_Suddenly his hands were gripped tightly in Jack's, stopping him from going further._

_"Ianto! What are you doing?" Jack asked with a slight waver in his voice._

_"Sir?" Ianto looked up at Jack in confusion._

_This whole situation was surreal in a way that he couldn't even begin to define. Despite the fact that he could feel and smell things in a very real way, he had been becoming more and more certain that he was actually dreaming. However, Jack stopping him from what he was doing made no sense. In every dream he'd ever had of Jack, Jack was normally instigating the sexual contact. And he'd **never** flat out stopped him before._

_Ianto watched as Jack looked at him and then looked down at his own arm. Despite the fact that he was finding it hard to concentrate, he noticed a strange metal wristband on Jack's arm._

_Jack released Ianto's hands, and they went directly back to the catch on Jacks trousers. He didn't get to undo them though because Jack slid forward off his chair and grabbed his head in his palms. Ianto could feel Jacks fingers digging into his chin as he forced Ianto to look at him._

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Jack was still trying to work out his shock as he stared at Ianto kneeling in front of him. When he'd placed the wristband on, he'd thought it would be like the other times he'd invaded Ianto's subconscious. Instead, the young man had appeared before him.

He was wearing next to nothing and that alone was enough for Jack's body to react. Then when Ianto had started to caress him, most of the blood in his body had obligingly rushed south. To make matters worse, he could actually touch Ianto, and Ianto could certainly touch him.

This was a very good indication that some small factor had changed. It was rather hard to concentrate though, because every time he tried to talk so far, Ianto would nuzzle his face against Jack's erection (_and lord hadn't that felt nice_), or he attempted to open Jack's catch on his trousers.

"Ianto, what were you doing before you got here?"

Christ, the young man's hands had gone back to his trousers.

"Ianto! Pay attention!" Jack held Ianto's face in one hand and used his other to stop Ianto's hands from undoing his trousers.

"What's the last thing you remember doing?" Jack watched a note of confusion slip briefly over the young man's face.

Ianto looked completely dazed, almost drugged. If he didn't know any better he'd say that Ianto was in some strange state of sleep walking.

Ianto was struggling against Jack's grip so he tightened his hold with both hands.

"Ianto, I need you to concentrate **for me**. Please, I need you to concentrate. I promise I'll let you go. Just answer some questions first. Okay?"

Ianto finally focused on Jack's face and Jack nearly came right then and there. He'd never seen the young man look at him like that. Hell he didn't think he'd ever seen anyone look at him with that expression in their eyes. What Jack had seen earlier, after he'd teased Ianto, was merely a mild version of the longing ensconced there now. There was so much desire and ferocity in the young man's eyes that he was certain he was going to burst into flames, just from that gaze alone.

"Jack…" Ianto said in a throaty voice.

"Ianto, what is the last thing you remember doing?" Jack asked again.

Jack watched as Ianto struggled to understand what he was saying. His eyes shuttered closed for a moment before he answered.

"I…I was lying down." Ianto's voice grew deeper with need as each word came from his lips.

"I went to sleep. Please, Jack. Please let me…" Ianto opened his eyes slowly and stared at Jack, his eyes dark and all but begging for Jack to release him.

Jack closed his own eyes for a second and tried to block out the effects Ianto's expression and voice were having on him. When he opened them a few seconds later, he avoiding looking at the young man kneeling before him. Instead he looked around his office. The room around him seemed somewhat hazy. Almost like everything but Ianto was just slightly out of focus. He glanced back at his chair and saw himself sitting in it.

He analyzed that for a moment. While he was doing so, Ianto struggled against him, managing to get his hands free. He felt Ianto's frantic scrambling at the catch of his trousers and then suddenly the young man's hand was inside and wrapped around his cock.

Jack's eyes slammed closed as he gasped aloud at the sensation. It was getting harder to focus, but it did help clarify a little more of what was going on. The only observation or conclusion he could come to was that when he'd put the wristband on and closed his eyes, he must've fallen asleep.

Either way, he wasn't going to fight against Ianto on this anymore. Even if they did anything, Ianto would think it was a dream, simply because that's all it was. It would add to the frustration he was building up in the young man. Jack would also get the benefit of not having to wait as long. Considering he didn't seem to have any sort of patience when it came to his seduction of Ianto, that was a good thing. He would just have to stop somehow if they went too far.

Jack relaxed into Ianto's touch and released him completely. It wasn't like he could take off the wristband while he was asleep anyway.

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_Ianto shuddered in need as he grasped Jack's erection in his palm. He just couldn't figure out why Jack was still holding him back. Jack wouldn't let go of Ianto's chin, no matter how much he struggled against him. He really **needed** to taste the skin he was holding in his hand. He needed it like he needed air to breath._

_If this was a dream, it was quickly becoming a nightmare._

_Suddenly Jack released his grip and Ianto growled as he pulled his hand out of Jack's trousers and dove his head into Jack's lap. Jack lay back as his body bucked up to meet him. Ianto growled and laved the hard cock through the fabric covering it. It was all the younger man could do to not tear the trousers away._

_The smell of Jack's skin was permeating the air and every time Ianto took a breath he could taste the other man on his lips and tongue. It hit his taste buds and exploded his whole body in sensation._

_Ianto reached his hands up, pushed Jack's shirt up and practically yanked Jack's trousers down over his hips. He licked his lips as he stared and he heard Jack groan somewhere above him. Ianto wanted to look at Jack, see the expression in his eyes, but he was too immersed in what lay before him._

_Somewhere in the back of his mind he realized that what he was staring at was amazing. Thick and rather long, Jack's cock protruded out from a nettle of black hair, lying hard against the toned muscles of his stomach. Ianto focused on it, noting the way it pulsed on its own, throbbing in tandem with the heart that beat in the chest above it. He focused on the slight curve, on how smooth it looked._

_He focused on the fact that he had no idea what to do with it._

_Ianto growled in frustration. He had never been this uncertain in dreams before. It was like his body had naturally known what to do in this type of situation. He looked up, to find Jack looking down at him. Jack obviously knew what was going through his mind because he suddenly chuckled under his breath._

_Jack reached his hand down and ran it over Ianto's cheek._

_"Just touch me, Ianto. You don't have to do anything else." He whispered softly._

_Reaching down further Jack brought Ianto's hand up from where it was resting on the upper part of his leg. Drawing it further up, he placed it on his erection. Ianto saw Jack close his eyes as he bucked his hips into the sensation. Ianto wrapped his fingers around the rigid flesh, moving slowly up and down. He brought his other hand up and cupped Jack's balls, rolling them carefully in his fingers and Jack drew in a sharp hiss of breath. Ianto nearly pulled his hand away until he realized that it was a hiss of pleasure._

_"Ianto." Jack moaned out almost inaudibly, while his hips took up a more steady rhythm._

_Ianto's eyes flickered shut for a moment at the sound. It was rough and unfiltered, and Ianto felt it quiver all the way down his spine._

_When he opened his eyes and stared at what his hands were doing, he knew he couldn't leave it at just this caress. Touching wasn't going to be enough._

_He'd known what he wanted when he put his hand down Jack's trousers in the first place. Slowly and tentatively he leaned his head down and flicked his tongue over the glans of Jack's cock. Taste exploded across his senses and suddenly he was licking, sucking, nibbling. His tongue flicked out several times as he laved Jack's cock from root to tip. Taking the head in his mouth he sucked hard, while flicking his tongue over the slit at the top._

_He wasn't prepared for the other man's reaction. Jack's moaned, his hips arching up, pushing his cock further into Ianto's mouth and then collapsed backwards again. His hips started a rhythmic thrusting. Jack's hands stroked up his cheek and through his hair. Ianto froze for a second, until he realized that he wasn't trying to force him, that he was just guiding him._

_He could hear Jack's moans and grunts all around him. They echoed off the walls and bounced back to where they lay on the floor. The sensations were so bloody real that he could practically feel Jack's body trembling in his hands._

_Ianto moaned around the feel of the hard shaft going in and out of his mouth. The velvety soft head was smooth and warm as it slid across his tongue. He tasted the salty sting of pre come on his lips and thrust his own hips forward, seeking sensation, groaning in frustration when his cock encountered the cold cement floor._

_Jack, apparently figuring out what was frustrating him, moved one of his legs forward and pressed against Ianto's erection. He whimpered around the turgid flesh thrusting in and out of his mouth causing Jack to thrust harshly up into the warmth._

_Ianto looked up towards where the older man lay on the floor until his eyes locked with Jack's. The moment their eyes met, Jack released Ianto's hair and slid his hand down to cup Ianto's cheek in his hand._

_"Relax your throat and try to swallow." He said roughly with a tender note to his voice._

_Ianto focused on trying to do as Jack told him and suddenly Jack was thrusting heavily into his mouth. He felt Jack's cock hit the back of his throat a couple of times and stopped himself from panicking and his throat from spasming by swallowing. Jack's cock went even deeper, almost down his throat, but not quite. Enough so that he could feel sparse pubic hair barely touching teasingly against his chin._

_Ianto couldn't remember a time when he had ever been this turned on, this achingly hard. The sensation of Jack fucking his throat, the smell of Jack's skin as he got closer and closer to orgasm, the taste of Jack, bitter yet sweet, on Ianto's tongue. All this combined to make an unconscionable lust that had Ianto thrusting uncontrollably against the leg centered between his own thighs._

_He groaned loudly as Jack pressed his leg further up into his erection. His teeth brushed lightly against the tender underside of Jack's cock, and without warning Jack grabbed Ianto's hair in his hands and began to thrust in earnest._

_"Oh god, Ianto! Christ, Yes! Do that again!" Jack cried out gratingly._

_Ianto looked up in time to see Jack throw his head back, his torso arching off the floor. Ianto ran his teeth lightly against the underside of Jack's cock again and Jack's hips abruptly lost their rhythm._

_Ianto felt Jack grasp his hair as he shuddered._

_"Ianto , oh fuck yes!" Jack cried out uncontrollably thrusting into his mouth as his cock swelled once, twice, three times and he was coming with a harsh moan._

_Ianto gasped and quickly began to swallow as his mouth was suddenly filled with Jack's come. Jack's head was thrown back, his body completely taut. As Ianto's eyes watched Jack he felt a harsh shudder wrack his own body._

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Across town Ianto's body trembled, his hips bucking up in his empty bed as he groaned out his release. His eyes flew open. His heart was pounding in his chest as he sat up.

Glancing down, he threw back the duvet covering him and nearly cried out in frustration.

_'Did I really just have a wet dream? Bloody hell! That hasn't happened since I was in Secondary.'_

Ianto threw the duvet towards his feet, knowing he was going to have to take the damn thing in to get dry cleaned and wondering how he was going to explain that to whomever was behind the counter. He stood up and went to clean himself off.

Standing in the loo, staring at his reflection in the mirror as he wet a cloth, he saw himself blink as tears welled up in his eyes.

"I'm never going to survive this."

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_ Reviews and contrusctive critisim appriciated!_


	5. Chapter 5 First Time for Everything

_AN:__ Thanks go to mama rocks for her quick BETA job, and her suggestions that help the story to read smoother.__ Just as a note, I actually like Gwen, though I can see some of the disadvantages her character throws in. Don't worry though, I'm not adding her into the mix. Just trying to establish a few things. There's a little more of other characters in the story, but that's because I needed it to continue the plot I have in mind. Of course, the boys'll probably hijack this chapter the same way they did with chapter 2. On another note, can anyone guess what I have had Jack and Ianto avoid doing? I mean besides several of the obvious things._

Chapter 5 - First Time for Everything

Jack looked around his office at the remaining team members of Torchwood Three. He felt so damn irresponsible. He'd completely missed how far gone Suzie was with the damn gauntlet. He couldn't help but think that this was altogether his fault. He should've seen the way Suzie was acting, should've given her some different projects to focus on. He should have fucking listened to Ianto when he pointed out how many fish Suzie was going through during her research. That alone had been enough to tip Ianto off, much less the people in Grangetown pet store.*

Hell, he should've just opened his fucking eyes to what was going on around him. The only person on the entire fucking team that hadn't been disobeying the rules was Ianto. Even Owen and Tosh had been taking alien artifacts out of the Hub. He knew that if he'd been paying closer attention, watching his team better, this would have never happened.

Jack also had a sneaking suspicion that his latest obsession with Ianto had not helped matters at all. There were a few times in the recent past that he could've sworn he should've noticed something, but because he was thinking of clever ways to drive Ianto closer to him, they had completely slipped by him.

No, he may not have pulled the trigger that killed Suzie, but he may as well have.

Then there was PC Gwen Cooper. First she'd watched as he got shot in the head. Then he suddenly comes back to life just in time for her to watch Suzie jam that gun into her chin and pulled the trigger. For someone who had probably not seen much violence or supernatural in her life, she'd certainly gotten a heavy dose of it tonight. Gwen Cooper would have to be insane to want to work for Torchwood. She'd have to be insane to want him as a boss.

Of course, that wasn't going to stop him from offering her the job.

It didn't help that he'd actually remembered his thought about wishing he had an opening for Gwen. It was like that had been the final straw for fate to fuck him over. Almost like someone had been listening to his thoughts and said _'Oh, you want her that bad. Well, I'm going to demand a sacrifice. How about your second in command?'_

He just couldn't understand why it had taken him so long to figure out what the hell was going on. One moment he's reading a report by Tosh about how rift activity is getting worse, the next he glances at the CCTV and he sees Suzie holding a gun on Gwen in front of the Water Tower. Suddenly, it was like everything about the last month just clicked in place. The murders, the knife, Suzie's strange behavior. Hell, even the god damn over abundance of fish.

Above everything, he'd seen the way Ianto had looked at him when he'd placed the knife and the glove in the secure archives. The young man had turned towards him and then quickly averted his gaze. He'd looked so frightened at that moment. Almost like he was expecting Jack to berate him for not pointing it all out sooner.

Ianto turned away from Jack eyes as quick as he could. He didn't know what was going to happen next, but he did know that what he was feeling was frightening him. Jack looked so broken, so guilt ridden, that he'd wanted nothing more than to comfort him. That reaction had felt foreign to him, enough to make him wonder when the hell he'd started to actually care about Jack.

'_Besides the lust that's been driving you insane._' His mind unhelpfully added.

Then there was the terrifying realization that he was hiding something just as bad as Suzie had been, if not worse. He was completely stuck in a void that didn't seem to want to release him. He was hiding too much, keeping too many secrets. Eventually he was going to start making mistakes. The whole situation was becoming one giant nightmare that he couldn't seem to wake up from.

So he couldn't comfort Jack, couldn't go near the other man. He just didn't know what he could do to make things better without feeling like a complete hypocrite.

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Ianto regretfully watched Jack as he walked off to go put Suzie's body down in the crypt and turned to look at Gwen. She was huddled up in Jack's chair, still shivering from the night's activities. Walking over to her, he tentatively placed his hand on her shoulder. She glanced up at him and he could tell she was still in shock.

"Would you like some coffee?" It was the least he could offer the woman. Not to mention, it would probably help with her shivering.

She nodded at him gratefully and he went to make her a cup. Owen and Tosh followed him out of the office. Owen's voice drifted up to him as he mixed the brew.

"Right bloody nutter, if you ask me. Now she's gone and Jack'll be pissed off and take it out on us. Well, I'm not sticking round for that. I'm off. You coming Tosh?"

Ianto glanced back long enough to see Tosh quickly gather her things. He heard a soft "Night Ianto" come from somewhere down below as she and Owen rushed out of the Hub.

Ianto brought the coffee back to Gwen and placed it on the desk in front of her. He smiled as she reached out and grabbed the cup in both hands. Just as she was about to take a drink she suddenly froze. He knew what was going through her mind and he smiled again to reassure her.

"It's not drugged. Don't worry." He said firmly.

After a few seconds she lifted the cup to her lips and took a small drink. Her face scrunched up as she glanced up at him in slight amazement.

"Wow. That's _really_ good." She said softly as Ianto took the seat across from her.

They sat quietly for a few more minutes, both enjoying his coffee making abilities.

"Wh…" She started to say, then stopped to study him for a moment. After a second more she finally continued.

"What do you think he's going to do to me?" She said with a slight quaver in her voice.

After a moment's hesitation, he stated rather certainly,

"I think he's going to offer you a job."

The look on Gwen's face was fairly priceless.

"But…what…" Gwen paused for a moment, with a confused look on her face. "Do you really?" She said with a hint of surprise.

"Really what?"

Ianto jumped at the sound of Jack's voice coming from behind him, a little closer then he would have expected.

'_Of course, he **would** choose to come back at that moment_.' Ianto thought as he stood up quickly and turned around. Jack was standing right behind the chair he'd been sitting in. Ianto saw that Jack still had the same expression from earlier on his face and had to struggle against leaning into the other man's personal space.

"Ianto, I'll be back in a little while. Can you watch over the Hub for me? I noticed that Owen and Tosh both took off."

Jack reached out and put his hand lightly on Ianto's shoulder as he spoke. Ianto felt himself sinking into the touch and quickly straightened up pulling away. He did it gently though, so as not to hurt Jack.

"Yes Sir." He said, his voice huskier then he would have liked.

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After giving Gwen the information she needed to show up at work, Jack told her to take a few days off and try to process everything she'd seen. When she had started making a few excuses about her police job and how long it was going to take to start working at Torchwood, he told her he'd take care of it and not to worry. Then he'd helped her get down from the roof of the building they were on and sent her on her way.

When he walked back into the Hub an hour later, he saw Ianto sitting at a workstation near the side of his office. He'd known that Ianto was going to stay around, after all he'd asked him to. Still it was a pleasant surprise to see the young man sitting at the computer, actually following his orders. At least someone actually listened to him when he asked them to do something.

He felt a shiver go up his spine as he recalled Ianto's expression again from earlier. He definitely needed to talk to the young man, at least to explain that he didn't blame him in any way for what had happened. How _**could**_ he blame Ianto when the entire thing was his fault for being so blind to what was right in front of him?

Of course, he may have mistaken the fear in Ianto's expression. But Jack had been alive long enough to know how to read most people rather easily. Unfortunately, Ianto was a hard man to read. He kept so much of himself hidden away from everyone. There had been several instances, in just the short time Ianto had been working for him, that he'd completely thrown Jack's assumptions out the window.

Jack left Ianto to continue working and went in to sit down at his desk. He nearly jumped out of his chair when a mug of coffee was set down next to him a little while later. Either Ianto was moving a lot more quietly then he used to, or Jack was way too focused on his own thoughts again.

Ianto was obviously trying not to smile or laugh because Jack noticed the corners of his mouth twitching. When Ianto finally lost the battle against his smile, Jack grinned back at him. Ianto moved as if he was going to sit on the other side of the desk and Jack grabbed him before he could do so.

Moving the coffee cup that Ianto had just set down, Jack pulled Ianto until he was sitting in front of him on his desk. He was still smiling up at the younger man when he saw a flicker of the same expression he'd seen earlier cross Ianto's features. He lost his own smile just as quickly.

"Ianto, I wanted…"

"Sir, I think I should…"

They both stopped talking as their voices overlapped. Jack didn't allow Ianto to continue as he started to speak again.

"Ianto, I wanted to tell you that I'm not mad at you. The way you looked at me earlier, so afraid. I just want you to understand that I did notice you were the only one who was obeying the rules of Torchwood."

Ianto turned away from him suddenly, but Jack continued anyway.

"I wouldn't yell at you for that. At any of you. This is my fault for not paying close enough attention. I should have listened to you when you kept sending me messages about all the things you were noticing about Suzie. I should have…" Jack's voice trailed away when Ianto turned back towards him, his face completely devoid of any hint of emotion.

Ianto stood up and took a few steps away from Jack.

"I understand sir. I wasn't thinking that, now or earlier. It isn't your fault either though. I think that Suzie was hiding something that just…" Ianto looked for a moment like he was struggling to find the right words and Jack looked at him quizzically. "I think she just got trapped between something she loved and something that she was obsessed with. So much so, that she didn't see any other way out."

Ianto's voice dropped down to nearly a whisper as he continued,

"No one could have figured it out. She hid herself too well."

Jack watched as he saw Ianto closing himself off. He could see that this whole thing was hitting the young man a lot harder then he would've expected, a lot harder than it should have been at all.

He did the only thing he could think of.

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Ianto flinched as Jack suddenly stood in front of him. He felt Jack's hands grab his hips pushing him back towards the desk. When the back of his thighs hit the edge he leaned somewhat heavily against it. He couldn't look at Jack, there was too much running through his mind right now. Guilt and shame were twisting in his abdomen, making him want to run out of that office, quick as he could and never come back.

Jack put his hands down on either side of Ianto's body, placing them flat against the desk, and Ianto groaned inwardly. Jack had to have figured out he was hiding something. He knew Jack was going to question him now. He'd obviously given something away, some small hint that he was betraying Jack just as much as Suzie had.

He was surprised when Jack leaned forward and nipped at his ear. Jack's lips ghosted over the skin as his teeth grasped the lobe, running the fleshy part back and forth between them, tugging gently at the same time. Every guilty self depreciating thought, everything that had happened that night, was swiftly and violently expelled from Ianto's mind.

Suddenly the only thing Ianto could feel and see was Jack. Jack's presence was all around him, drawing him further and further away from everything that he thought meant anything to him. He could smell Jack's scent, heady with an overabundance of arousal, feel the warmth of his body coming off him in waves, hear the lave of the tongue against his skin. It was too much sensation for Ianto to handle, he couldn't think, could barely breathe.

Ianto's hands flew down to the edge of the desk, gripping it tightly, as the other man's mouth nipped at his ear again before moving his head down. Jack's tongue traveled across his neck, licking and nibbling at every bit of skin they came in contact with. Ianto felt his body react to the touch, his cock hardened painfully, fully, within moments pressing against his briefs and the hard zip of his trousers.

Each time Jack's teeth grazed against his skin, Ianto felt a jolt of pleasure rip throughout every nerve of his body. He threw his head back arching his neck into the sensation. When Jack's mouth reached his other ear, he felt the rough tip of the other man's tongue run along the outer edge before they gripped the lobe between his teeth, giving it the same treatment as the first.

Ianto cried out, a sound rough with need, the moan coming from somewhere deep inside of him. He couldn't stop as his hips moved, bucking forward until they collided roughly with Jacks. He whimpered when he felt the answering thrust of Jack's hips against his own. Their erections collided against one another and Ianto felt another ripple of pleasure rush through him.

Jack started to pull away from his ear and Ianto grabbed him by the hips. He thrust his hips forward once more only to have Jack pull back just before their erections connected again.

Ianto sighed in frustration. He was getting so bloody frustrated with Jack's games. It seemed like every time Jack touched him, it was more powerful than the last time, more seductive. Jack pulled one his hands off the desk and stroked it down the side of Ianto's face. It was the exact same caress he'd done in Ianto's dream, while Ianto's mouth had moved around his hard flesh.

Suddenly everything he'd felt in that dream came crashing back into his body. His senses overwhelmed him, as he remembered how much he'd needed Jack, how he **had** to taste him. He remembered Jack's cock, the languid thrust of his hips as he'd plunged in and out of Ianto's mouth, the sound of his voice as he'd moaned out Ianto's name, the way Jack's body had arched off the ground when he came.

Ianto groaned aloud and leaned into Jack's palm.

Jack smiled wickedly at him, his fingers resting lightly on Ianto's cheek.

"Finally, getting there aren't you Ianto?" Jack said quietly, his voice rougher than Ianto had ever heard it before.

His hand ghosted down Ianto's cheek, his fingers slowly running over Ianto's lips.

"I think you deserve a reward." Jack said softly as his head dipped closer, his lips a breath away from Ianto's.

Ianto's body tensed. Everything up until this point could be explained away by lust. Everything could be forgiven in some small part of his mind as out of his control. But if Jack kissed him, he knew there would be no going back. A kiss was too much, too intimate. Ianto's fingers gripped the desk even tighter as Jack closed the distance between them. He couldn't think of a way to stop the other man, couldn't concentrate enough to try.

The kiss started out rather chaste, a soft brush of lips against his own. Then Jack brushed their lips together again, lingering for a little longer this time. His arms came up, his hands cupping Ianto's neck as he pressed their mouths closer together.

Ianto felt something inside of him snap. He closed his eyes tightly as he raised his hands and pulled Jack closer to him, his hands gripping Jack's braces and shirt tightly. He cried out into Jack's mouth, moaning softly into the moist lips pressed against his own. Jack's tongue suddenly darted out, mapping his lips and Ianto opened his mouth more, feeling as it swept into his mouth and brushed over his own.

Ianto tilted his head further, trying to get closer, trying to feel more. His hips moved rhythmically straining to get contact, his heart pounding in his chest, as he mapped out every part of the soft wet cavern of the Jack's mouth. Jack pulled back gently for a moment, his tongue retreating from Ianto's mouth. His teeth bit down softly on Ianto's lips before he plunged his tongue back in and wrapped it around the one that met it just as fiercely.

Ianto was moaning, his head and body full of everything Jack's mouth was doing to him. It wasn't enough, it would never be enough. Jack moved his hands down to Ianto's hips and pulled them roughly against his own. Their bodies thrust in tandem, each time they came into contact, Ianto's body grew tighter and tighter. He breathed heavily as their tongue's battled roughly with one another.

Jack's hand's moved around to Ianto's arse and gripped him securely, pulling their hips together in one strong move. Ianto cried out into Jack's mouth one final time before yanking his mouth away from Jack's and throwing his head back. He arched as his body coiled, light flashing against his eyelids, his hips thrusting roughly into Jack's.

Almost before he knew it was happening, he felt his come spill out of his cock, coating the inside of his briefs.

Jack didn't move away from Ianto for a few minutes. He wanted to let the younger man recover and he knew that if he stepped away, Ianto would probably fall over. He ran his fingers lightly down the side of the young man's face and grinned when he got a moan in response.

After a few minutes, Ianto seemed a little more in control. Jack took a step back and helped Ianto steady himself as he pulled away from the desk. When Jack pulled his hands away from Ianto's body, he heard the young man groan again.

He leaned in a little closer, almost back to where he was when he'd first kissed Ianto, and saw a shiver run through Ianto's body at his proximity.

"Only one reward tonight, Ianto." Jack said softly, as he leaned in and placed a chaste kiss on Ianto's cheek.

Jack turned him and pushed him gently out the door.

"Go home, clean up, and get some rest."

TBC

_AN: Okay, so I was right. They completely hijacked the end of another chapter. I swear, this is turning into one big smutty PWP instead of an actual story with somewhat of a plot._

* In case you're wondering where this reference comes from. Couldn't resist putting it in the story. Torchwoods External Hub


	6. Chapter 6 Trying to Avoid the Whole

AN:_ Shorter chapter this time... otherwise the next one was way too long. It's almost 4000 words without this part._

_Thanks again to mama rocks for the excellent BETA job and point out a few things that didn't quite make sense.  
_

Chapter 6 - Trying to Avoid the Whole Damn thing

Ianto lay silently in his bed, his eyes closed tightly, as he fought against acknowledging the new day. He'd woken up before his alarm had gone off, barely rubbed the sleep from his eyes, when the memory of what had happened the night before came crashing down on him. He'd groaned aloud, the sound harsh and dry, before collapsing back onto his bed and closing his eyes tightly.

On one side he was somewhat grateful. At least with what had happened, it'd stopped him from having any dreams of Jack whilst he slept. On the other side, he was completely horrified. He would have gladly put up with the dreams, to not have known how powerful an effect that Jack had over him. He just couldn't believe the way his body had betrayed him. One touch of Jack's lips against his and he'd completely lost himself. It was something that had never happened to him before, something that he hadn't even known was possible.

He really didn't want to go to work, didn't want to go see Lisa and look at her, knowing that she might be able to see his disgrace. His sins were becoming greater and greater with each touch, each caress, and especially with that damnable kiss that he shared with Jack. He couldn't help but worry that the next time it would go too far to be justifiable. That the next time he might just do as Jack wanted and beg him to shag him until he couldn't see straight.

He was so bloody tired of feeling this way.

Ianto sighed loudly as his alarm suddenly sent a harsh beeping tone resounding around the room. Reaching over he quickly shut it off, then rolled out of bed. He heard his bare feet slap against the floor as he walked. His mind kept playing what had happened like an endless film.

'_Jack kissed you and oh, by the way, you kissed him back.' _Great, now he was going to have to listen to that fucking voice remind him of that fact all bloody day. He could just see it now, he'd be sitting down with Lisa and his conscience would just be practically screaming at him, telling him he was no good and that he couldn't keep his promises.

Maybe he could avoid Jack, at least until Doctor Tanizaki came to help Lisa. It could be possible to do so, he would just have to spend as much time as possible with Lisa and in reception. '_Except for the fact that he is your boss and you can't exactly escape that factor. You'd have to see him eventually._'

Ianto found himself nodding and nearly screamed in frustration. Great, now he was starting to agree with that bloody voice in his head. He really had gone completely nutter. There was no more quite or maybe about it.

As Ianto pulled out his razor and shaving foam, he realized that there might be a more justifiable way of doing things. He could just simply avoid being alone with Jack. That would solve his problem, at least until Lisa was better.

Ianto looked at his reflection and smiled for the first time in what felt like forever.

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Jack was getting frustrated. Ianto was, simply put, driving him absolutely crazy.

Jack moved some more gadgets around the box he was sorting through as he thought about what had happened the previous night. He certainly wasn't paying much attention to what he was doing. Instead of focusing on the task at hand, he kept leaning back around his desk to check the CCTV. Every time he did, his eyes would centre on Reception and the young man that was constantly on his mind.

He still smiled every time he thought of how responsive Ianto had been in his arms the previous night. He had been smiling so much that both Tosh and Owen had given him strange looks throughout the day.

However, he had a sneaking suspicion that Ianto was trying to avoid him and he couldn't quite figure out why. Of course, not that Suzie's death wasn't affecting all of them, but what had started as a horrible night had, amazingly enough, turned into a fairly good early morning.

'_But still,_' he thought to himself, _'Ianto's barely said five words to you all day. Even when he dropped off your coffee the only thing he'd said was a quick 'Good morning, Sir' before he rushed out of the office and up to Reception.'_

What was odd, was that even Tosh had noticed Ianto was acting strange and more distant than normal, which of course, wasn't saying much. She'd asked him about it earlier and he'd shrugged his shoulders in response and asked her why she was in his office. Tosh had looked affronted for a moment before telling him what they had been tracking that evening wasn't actually a meteor, but appeared to be some type of spaceship shaped like a meteor. The program Tosh had monitoring the rift had predicted it to hit sometime within the next hour.

It was looking more and more like Gwen wasn't going to get her few days of acceptance before he had to call her in. Which, to be honest, she probably didn't really need anyway.

Jack sighed heavily and finally gave up as he moved the box from his desk. Sinking down in his chair, he stared at the CCTV and the man who was currently causing him a lot more trouble then he'd ever imagined. This situation was going to bother him until he went to Ianto and asked him what the hell was going on.

Just as he stood up to do so, Tosh called out to him through his office door.

"It's down Jack. Want me to send a message to Gwen?"

"No. I'll do it. Just get what we need together please." He said as he grabbed his greatcoat off the coat rack.

She turned to rush off and he stopped her momentarily.

"And Tosh? Can you make sure we have masks this time?"

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As soon as the team left, Ianto went down into the Hub. His eyes drifted towards Jack's office then quickly averted away. All day long he'd had to put up with his subconscious reminding him of what had happened the night before. Every time he had gone near Jack, for any reason, he felt his body aching to touch him. His mind had even come up with a million clever little ways to do so, _'brush his hand as you put down the coffee, run your fingers along his neck when you walk by him, quick whilst no one's looking, grab him and snog him senseless'_ but he was resisting every one of them. It was still proving a harder challenge then he first anticipated.

Like right now, even when Jack wasn't in the office, he was still having a tough time trying to stay away. He _**really**_ wanted to just go and lean on the edge of Jack's desk and remember what the whole experience had felt like. It didn't help that the more he tried to avoid being alone with Jack, the more insistent the voice in his mind got.

Ianto groaned inwardly as he moved toward the doorway that would lead him to the lower ground and Lisa's room. At least if he was visiting her he could remind himself why all of this was so important. All he would have to do is hold her hand, and repeat to himself how much he loved her.

The problem was, even when he did sit with her, his mind was now drifting to Jack. When she was awake, he wanted her to sleep so that she wouldn't be in pain. But today, every time he'd gone to see her, he wished she'd just open her eyes and talk to him. Help to remind him of why he was doing all of this. Help to see that he did still love her and that this was still all about helping her.

For once, he almost wished Lisa would wake up, despite the pain.

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Jack held The Doctor's hand in his palms. He checked it over carefully, making sure it was intact. He didn't see any damage on it, but he really needed to get it back in a containment jar. It was a good thing he had extras down in the Hub.

Standing up, he turned around to rush down to the Hub, almost running right into Ianto as he came through the doorway holding a containment jar full of liquid. Jack looked at him gratefully as he placed The Doctors hand in the jar. Ianto handed him a flannel so that he could wipe his hands of the liquid and Jack smiled at him again before quickly turning to look at the hand in the Jar.

Jack picked up the Jar and turned towards the door to the Hub. He stopped, putting it back on the counter before turning to Ianto.

Ianto's face started in surprise as Jack grabbed him and placed a swift kiss on his lips before turning away, picking up the jar again and walking through the door. Once Jack got back to the Hub he placed the jar back where the girl had grabbed it from and brought a stool over to watch it.

Jack knew he'd almost lost his one connection to The Doctor today. If it hadn't been for Ianto's quick actions he may not have made it back to the Hub in time. He was definitely going to have to reward Ianto.

He knew just how he was going to do it too.

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TBC


	7. Chapter 7 Rewards are Sweet like Candy

_AN: Hint at Gwack. (You know the duck sounding pair) but it's nothing specific and his more of a thought then anything. Like I said earlier, _**REALLY**_ not going there. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go pour bleach in my brain just to get that thought out of my mind. _

_I thought I'd be nice an end some frustration. Since chapter 8 is now done and with mama rocks being BETA'd and chapter 9 is almost done, I figured I'd put up chapter 7. :)  
_

_Thanks go to mama rocks for her awesome BETA job. She's really helped a lot on this story (especially this chapter) and I'm extremely grateful!! One more thing, ____j_ust to let everyone know, I respond to all reviews, even if it's just to say thank you. If you don't receive a response it's because either you posted anomalously, have your PM feature turned off, or this website has messed up again. But I appreciate all of your reviews immensely. And I'm seriously thinking of holding back on the SMUT every other chapter.**_ (So _****TOTALLY **kidding...sigh)_ I did get way more reviews when I did that though. :D_

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Chapter 7 - Rewards are Sweet like Candy Kisses

Ianto made sure everything was set right before leaving. Lisa had been asleep when he'd gone to check on her, and despite the way he'd been thinking the past few days, he was actually grateful. Guilt still gnawed at his gut, but ever since he'd started to avoid being alone with Jack it hadn't been nearly as dreadful.

However, there was something else bothering him now, he just couldn't figure out exactly what it was. He thought it over as he entered the door to his flat and closed it softly behind him. It took him a while to set things up for the morning and that gave him even more time to think about the situation. As he lay down in his bed and closed his eyes, he finally realized that he knew at least some parts of the problem.

Without Jack's_ special_ attention he was starting to feel separated from the rest of the team. He didn't think that was the main difficulty though because he _shouldn't_ be a part of the team. As soon as Lisa was well, they were going to leave. It would be much easier if he didn't form any deeper bonds with the others.

There was also the fact that he _actually_ missed spending time with Jack. Missed it more than he wanted to acknowledge and a helluva lot more than he wanted to admit, even to himself. There was something almost _seductive_ about the idea of Jack and him together. It was undoubtedly a lot more powerful than he would have ever imagined. The thought of what Jack could do to him, what he had done to him _already_, was enough to make him shiver, even now as he lay alone in his bed.

One thing of which he was certain was that his guilt was no longer associated just with Lisa. He was slowly starting to come to the realization that it had nothing to do with Jack's 51st century pheromones or the lust that would take over his own body every time he saw the other man. After seeing and hearing some of the things that Jack had admitted to him right before he'd kissed him, he was actually starting to worry about how much he was going to hurt Jack when he did leave. Ianto didn't want to think of how badly the consequences of his actions were going to affect the older man. He didn't want to take off and leave knowing that Jack would only blame himself for not paying attention, for not noticing all the signals.

Unfortunately, there was just no way to fix this situation.

Ianto let his mind wander a little further as he imagined what would happen after he disappeared. Owen would be too wrapped up in his own world, probably not even noticing Ianto was gone. Tosh, the only other person on the team that he had any connection to, would probably be hurt but she'd soon get over it. It was Torchwood. People joined and left all the time. Of course, they didn't normally leave the way he was planning, but she would still find a way to justify it.

Gwen would probably be the one to help Jack. She hadn't known Ianto that long, and with Doctor Tanizaki coming in such a short time, Ianto leaving would probably barely register in her mind. She would be the one sitting in Jack's office asking about Ianto, helping Jack to realize that none of this was his fault. That he should blame Ianto, because Ianto was fully responsible for it.

Ianto cringed against that thought as his eyes flew open to lock on the darkened bedroom ceiling. He felt a gnawing sensation in his chest.

It took him a moment to realize the very thought of Gwen comforting Jack made him _jealous_. He didn't want Gwen to be there for Jack. He didn't want the woman to console him, somehow knowing that if Jack made any overt moves, Gwen would probably fall willingly into to bed with him. He'd watched every time he'd been around the two of them together, and he'd seen it in Gwen's face when she looked at Jack. She was definitely interested, boyfriend or no boyfriend.

Ianto had also observed the way Jack looked at Gwen. He'd shown interest_, _ not as much as he had towards Ianto, but he _had_ shown interest, and that was enough when it came to Jack.

Ianto groaned and closed his eyes again. The pictures that suddenly inundated in his mind made him want to shout in frustration. Gwen and Jack rolling around in bed together, Gwen crying out as Jack ran his hands over her body. Ianto turned his head and groaned into his pillow. He really hated that idea, hated to even imagine it.

Suddenly the pictures changed. It was Ianto lying there next to Jack, him crying out as Jack entered his body, slowly. Ianto's body arching up to increase the speed of his entry. It was him clutching Jack's shoulder and digging his nails into the hard flesh below them, as Jack fucked in and out of his body with long steady stokes.

He groaned and sighed at the same time as the images flicked faster through his mind.

Now he was entering Jack's body as Jack cried out, pulling Ianto towards him and forcing his tongue into Ianto's mouth. Ianto smiled as his body relaxed further into his bed. He barely even noticed when those soft ghostly hands began to caress him and that mouth nipped at the skin of his neck and ears.

As his breathing evened out he smiled softly. _'Jack must have some type of fetish with my ears, because he is always nipping at them.' _

He drifted further into sleep, into a dream of Jack and the sensual things he was doing to Ianto's body.

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Jack sat in his chair behind his desk holding the metal wristband in his hands. He really wanted to reward Ianto, even if the young man had no idea he was doing it. However, after what had happened the last time, he was a little hesitant to use the band. He still hadn't even looked into the writing that he'd found the last time. Of course, he hadn't really had a lot of free time considering they'd had a sex crazed alien that was killing off men to feed on their orgasmic energy.

Yet he still found himself debating the wristband and almost ready to use it. If this wasn't an addiction, or something quite like it, he didn't know what the solution could be. But addiction implied that he _had_ to use it, _had_ to _keep_ using it, and he certainly didn't feel that way.

Despite how long he'd been alive and the infinite amount of patience that he'd developed over that time, Ianto often caused him to feel reckless and immature. He was starting to have just as hard a problem resisting Ianto as the young man had resisting him when he touched him. He did have a sneaking suspicion that it had nothing to do with the wristband and everything to do with the subjects involved. As much as he'd loved the anticipation and slow seduction in the beginning, he was starting to regret not taking Ianto up against a tree the moment he met him and then hiring him so he could keep doing it whenever he wanted to.

Every time he used the wristband on Ianto, there was a little more sensation, a little more lust. The reactions were stronger when he put it on, to the point that he could almost feel Ianto's side of the seduction. He could feel it as it pulled to him and increased his own level of frustration. So much so that he found he had to _**really**_ touch Ianto the next time he saw him. Even if it was just running his hands down the young man's back, brushing their hands together, or running his fingers slowly down Ianto's cheek.

No this was unquestionably more of a want, of an obsession, with the way Ianto reacted to his touch when he was wearing it. It definitely had nothing at all to do with an addiction to the wristband and everything to do with Jack himself.

Still, if he wasn't careful, Ianto was going to start to get suspicious, especially if something like the last time happened again. He grinned as he realized an answer to part of the problem. Jack placed the wristband on his arm and relaxed back into his chair, closing his eyes.

He would just have to make sure he didn't fall asleep this time.

-----------

_Ianto groaned as he felt hands drifting up his body. There was someone lying behind him in bed, someone who was most decidedly having a profound effect on his senses. He felt a hand drift down his back and cup one of his arse cheeks, pinching slightly then releasing to run over the same spot as it soothed the area._

_He drew in a sharp breath, tasted the scent in the air, and knew instantly that it was Jack lying next to him. It was Jack's hands running over his arse, Jack whose weight was causing the bed to dip slightly next to him. Ianto arched into the touch as his own body shifted closer to the warmth of the other man and he heard a soft chuckle next to his ear._

_The sound went straight to his groin and he felt the answering response as his cock began to harden quickly. He felt his briefs tighten further as Jacks hands curved around him and pulled him further back against his body, pressing his erection into Ianto's arse._

_Ianto groaned as he felt the material of Jack's clothes rub against his nearly nude body. _

"_Jack, too many clothes…" He breathed out, his voice heavy with arousal._

_Suddenly Jack's body disappeared from behind him. Ianto could still feel his hands ghosting over him, but the weight of Jack's body was gone. _

"_Jack?" _

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Jack's eyes flew open, shifting around his office. He could still feel the connection to Ianto, but only while his eyes had been closed had he actually felt and seen Ianto's body next to his. He could've sworn he'd been lying next to the young man in a bed.

'_That's certainly interesting._' He thought to himself.

It seemed that the wristband caused something different to happen depending on the conscious state of the individuals using it. Up until that last time both of them had been awake every time he'd used it and he'd kept his own eyes open. So it had worked for him by imparting suggestions of what he was thinking into Ianto's mind. Then last time both of them had been asleep and it had transported Ianto into the Hub, essentially into Jack's dream. Now, Ianto must be asleep. If he closed his eyes he could be in Ianto's dreams.

Jack decided to try it again. He closed his eyes slowly, watching the Hub disappear behind his eyelids a millimetre at a time.

Ianto's hands pushed against him, nearly knocking him off the bed. Jack watched as Ianto grabbed him, pulling his body nearly flush with his own, to stop him from falling.

"Jack, where did you go?" Ianto whimpered, as he ran his hand around, grabbed Jack's ass and yanked him forward into his own hips.

Jack heard Ianto draw in a deep breath as their hard cocks came in contact with one another.

Jack groaned, his eyes in the dream world clasping shut, when Ianto leaned forward and bit gently against his neck, then ran his tongue over it.

"Please don't leave me again, Jack." Ianto said softly as he nuzzled his mouth against Jack's neck.

"Please."

Jack grinned and ran his hands up to Ianto's hair, clasping it firmly before tilting his head and claiming Ianto's mouth in a kiss.

-----------

_Ianto's arms reached across the bed as he'd turned towards where Jack had been laying, searching for the warmth that had disappeared. He couldn't figure out why Jack had left him. He wanted more than the ghostly feel of the other man's hands, he wanted the man himself._

_Ianto felt the weight of Jack's body sink back into the mattress in front of him. Suddenly his searching hands came in contact with Jack's body again, accidentally pushing against him. He felt Jack lose his balance and quickly grabbed him pulling his body close to his own. _

"_Jack, where did you go?" He almost cringed at the whimper he heard in his own voice, but quickly suppressed it. _

_It was so hard to concentrate when Jack was with him, when he could feel his body next to his. Reaching over Jack's hip, he grabbed Jacks arse and pulled his body forward until he could feel his cock against his own. He drew in a deep breath, the sensation not quite enough to satisfy him, not when it was blocked through Jack's clothes. _

_Ianto leaned in to Jack's neck and ran his teeth over the skin just below Jack's ear, biting down softly, then running his tongue over it. After the taste of Jack's skin coated Ianto's tongue, the exhilarating flavour of it burned down his throat._

_It was too much, yet not enough. _

_He needed more, needed to know that Jack wasn't going to leave him again. Ianto didn't want to waste anymore of the time he had left with Jack._

"_Please don't leave me again, Jack." He whispered into the skin under his mouth, as he nestled his head against Jack's neck and breathed deeply._

"_Please." _

_He hated sounding so needy, hated it with every fibre of his being, but he wanted Jack **right now**._

_Jack pulled back from his questing mouth, ran his hand into Ianto's hair and tilted his head back as his lips met Ianto's in a soft kiss. Ianto cried out, his hips abruptly bucking forward into Jack's again. Jack had never kissed him in his dreams, the taste of his mouth was heady and spicy as it hit his lips. It exploded throughout his body causing him to groan his pleasure into the mouth moving over his own. The smell of Jack's body permeated the air around him, making his head to spin._

_Ianto ran his hands up and cupped Jack's face in his palms, his fingers twisting lightly in the silky hair at the nape of his neck as he opened his mouth to Jack's seeking tongue. The feelings were becoming more intense, with each moment that passed. The sensation becoming more familiar as Ianto remembered his last vivid dream of Jack. He arched up as Jack ran his own hands down Ianto's chest and his fingers circled Ianto's nipples before pinching down delicately. He thrust his own tongue deeply into Jack's mouth at the sensation, mapping out the soft cavern it found before tangling wetly with the other man's._

_Ianto released one of his hands from Jack's hair and tugged harshly at his shirt, trying to unbutton it. He cried out in frustration as his fingers slipped past the button. He tried again, a different button, only to have the same thing happen._

_Abruptly, Jack pulled his mouth away from him and leaned in towards his ear. He could feel Jack's breath brush across his skin, shivering at the sensation as the he whispered in his ear. _

"_Hold on a moment. I promise I'll be right back."_

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Originally Jack had been having a hard time trying to keep his eyes closed. However, once he'd realized the situation was malleable, he'd decided to take full advantage of it.

When Ianto had tried to remove Jack's shirt, he'd noticed the problem they were going to face right away. He told Ianto he'd be right back and opened his eyes. He couldn't remember a time that he'd moved as quickly as he had when he stripped off all of his clothes and climbed down into his hidey-hole bed.

He didn't want to have to open his eyes again unless he absolutely had to.

When he closed his eyes again he saw Ianto lying on his back with his arms stretched out above him. Jack felt his cock harden fully at the sight of Ianto looking so open and willing for him. He pressed his body into Ianto's side, tilting his pelvis until he heard the young man growl beside him.

'_He actually growled?'_ Jack thought with a grin that quickly disappeared when Ianto grabbed him and yanked him on top of his body.

Jack only stayed there for a few seconds before he sat back and looked at the young body spread out so overtly before him. He let his eyes run over Ianto's chest, taking in the sight of the dark unruly hair that covered it. His eyes followed that hair as it grew into a thin line that disappeared under Ianto's briefs. He watched Ianto breath in and out as a harsh sheen of sweat broke out in the hard planes of his chest.

He needed to get that barrier off of Ianto, needed to see the hard cock encased within. He worried for a second, thinking that he might have the same problem as Ianto had while trying to disrobe him. Taking a deep breath, he ran his hands down Ianto's body and hooked his thumbs under the briefs. He felt the soft skin on the other side of the material, before slowly working them over Ianto's hips.

When Ianto's erection was free of its confines he heard the young man groan, a sound that came from somewhere deep in his body. He pulled the briefs further down until they rested on Ianto's thighs.

Ianto's hips tilted up minutely and Jack's heart beat faster in his chest. He couldn't help the next words that came from his mouth.

"Christ Ianto. You are so fucking hot."

Ianto's breathing got harsher at the words and Jack stared at him, his eyes running longingly over every hard plane and every muscle of the younger man's body. Ianto's whole body was now covered in a fine sheen of sweat making Jack want to lick every inch of flesh he could see.

"Touch me…" He heard Ianto pant out between breaths, his voice heavy with arousal. "I need you to…"

Jack saw Ianto's hard cock jump against his stomach and his eyes locked on it in fascination. He watched it throb in time with every breath Ianto took. The sight alone was enough to make his body heat up as he felt arousal shoot through every inch of him.

He nearly jumped when Ianto all but screamed out in a throaty voice tinged with need.

"Touch me Jack. Please!"

Jack had wanted to take this slow, enjoy what Ianto was offering him, even if it was only a dream for the young man. Before he could think about what he was doing, he yanked Ianto's briefs off completely and tossed them behind him. He lay down on top of Ianto, his entire weight resting on the body below him. He groaned as his skin met Ianto's, both their bodies rubbing deliciously together. Jack felt hot…hotter then he'd ever been in his entire long life. Ianto's body was like an open flame against skin.

Jack reached up and grasped Ianto's head in his palms as he brought their lips together in a long wet kiss, feeling slight stubble scratch against his lips, as their tongues battled with one another. He groaned into the kiss, tasting the heady flavor of Ianto's mouth as it suffused throughout his entire body. Ianto's arms wrapped around Jack's shoulders, pulling him further into the kiss. His nails dug harshly into the muscles as Ianto opened his mouth further into the kiss, his tongue pushing fiercely into Jack's mouth as it battled for dominance.

Jack knew at that moment that he was never going to be able to get enough of Ianto. No matter how much time they had, he would always want another kiss, another touch, another dose of hard flesh rubbing lusciously against his own.

He pulled his mouth away slowly, suckling on Ianto's tongue as it left his mouth, before dragging his lips along Ianto's jaw. He flicked out his own tongue, tasting the sweat and skin of the young man below him. The mixture went straight to his senses before spreading out and causing his head to swim in desire and hunger. His mouth grew more aggressive as he moved it further back along Ianto's neck until he was biting and sucking, leaving love bites everywhere.

His hands traveled down Ianto's chest, feeling the soft skin against his fingertips. He felt Ianto's hips push forward into his own, the friction causing Jack to thrust downward heavily as their erections slid against one another. Their hips began to move tighter, thrusting up and thrusting down, their erections meeting, each time causing Jack to groan with pleasure.

Ianto was moaning continuously in Jack's ear with every thrust of his hips, every lave of his tongue, every brush of teeth against his skin. Jack felt precome mix with the sweat on their stomachs easing their thrusting and sliding even more. Jack sank his teeth into Ianto's shoulder as he thrust his hips down, feeling the hard body shudder under him.

He heard Ianto cry out in frustration.

"I need more, please," the words were nearly a sob, "please Jack."

Jack felt Ianto run his hands down his back, his nails digging into the soft flesh, before stopping on his ass. He felt Ianto's hands flex as they ran over the muscled planes of his buttocks prior to gripping him tightly and jerking their bodies together in one rough move. Jack gasped as his lungs reached for air and it was abruptly too much.

Jack pulled his body back far enough so that he could reach their erections. Gripping them tightly in his hand he began to move up and down swiftly. Ianto's hips bucked in time with each stroke, his lips forming harsh groans that echoed through the room, as Jack pushed the flesh together in his palm, running up and down, squeezing tighter with each downward stroke.

Pleasure burst through Jack, the heat becoming overwhelming, his abdomen coiling as he tightened his grip and sped up his hand. His other hand ran across Ianto's chest pinching the hard nub it encountered. He sped his stroking even more as he leaned in and bit down softly on Ianto's other nipple, then flicked his tongue out to taste it.

Ianto cried out, his body tensed and arched into Jack's hand, his hips spasming. Jack felt the fire of Ianto's body burning him, the flames licking up his cock until they exploded outward. Ianto's gaze locked on his as they both groaned out their release together.

Suddenly Jack felt his own bed underneath his body. His hips were still thrusting heavily, his body still shuddering from his release. He opened his eyes to see his hand wrapped around his cock, his seed covering his lower body. He smiled softly to himself as he got out of bed to go clean himself off.

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Ianto woke from his dream as he thrust his hips forward and groaned out his release. His eyes flew open, his heart still beating heavily in his chest.

"Bloody hell! Not again!" He cried out into the empty room.

He stood up to go clean himself off and froze as he noticed his briefs lying on the floor at the end of the bed.

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TBC

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_AN: I am starting to HATE that wristband. Every time it comes out, the boys decide it's time to go overboard. They weren't supposed to do that. Bad, bad, bad Ianto and Jack!_


	8. Chapter 8 Not Quite Payback

_AN: The boys are getting worse. Ianto hijacked the beginning of this chapter. Although, it worked so well for the storyline that I'm completely on his side. :D_

_Thanks to mama rocks for all the great suggestions and the extremely quick BETA job.  
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Chapter 8 - Not Quite Payback

Ianto turned and glared at the door leading into the tourist office from outside. There were times, often when he was in a mood like the one now, that he wondered if anyone would ever walk through that door that wasn't working for, or delivering food for Torchwood. He shook his head and rolled his eyes slightly. Of course no one visited the bloody office, it was full of three-year old pamphlets and information about Cardiff that was probably a good ten years out of date.

_'If I was staying, I'd fix that'_ he thought miserably as he sighed and looked at the clock for what seemed to be the millionth time in the past five minutes. If he didn't know any better he would've sworn it was moving backwards.

After he'd woken up the night before he'd been unable to go back to sleep no matter how hard he'd tried. Now he'd spent the entire day fighting the vestiges of sleep that kept threatening to take him over. He was stuck at Torchwood while everyone but him and Tosh we're chasing down some alien signature that Tosh's computer had discovered. If he hadn't had to remain on guard and make sure he didn't slip his cover, he probably would have lost the battle and fallen asleep hours ago.

'_Those seven cups of coffee and avoiding being alone with Jack may have helped a bit too you know.'_

That was another thing. When he was this drained, he had absolutely no control over his thoughts. He'd had to listen to his fucking conscience all day. If he was a little more awake, he'd have at least had a chance. But without that filter of alertness, he was delegated to thinking about everything frustrating him, including Jack Bloody Harkness.

'_Just think, if nothing had happened to Lisa, you might've been married to her by now. You wouldn't be sitting here in an empty tourist office, trying to figure out how the hell you'd ended up here.'_

Ianto grimaced and looked at the clock again. _'A million and one.'_

"You know, if I didn't know any better I'd think you wanted to take a hammer to that clock."

Ianto jumped up at the sound of Jack's voice, nearly knocking over his chair. He reached out to grab it at the same time that Jack did, and abruptly took a step back when their hands nearly collided. He knew, without a doubt, that if they touched he would have a hard time stopping. He was just too God damned knackered to even want to.

"Sir? What can I do for you?" he said while trying to keep his voice from exposing his fatigue.

Jack stood next to him for a moment, his head tilted slightly as if studying him. Ianto attempted to ignore him, tried to disregard everything that expression was doing to him. He struggled to convince himself that he wanted Jack to leave, that he wanted to scream and yell at the man to just go away and leave him be.

It didn't work.

After that bloody dream and almost no sleep, his body ached to touch Jack's. Ianto knew what he _**really**_ wanted was to just grab Jack and pull his body towards him. He wanted to rip the man's clothes off and bury himself in him. Bury all the exhaustion, all the rage, all the guilt, and all the lust that was beginning to border on addiction.

He took another step away from Jack and nearly collided with the counter behind him. Jack reached out to grab him, but Ianto carefully avoided the touch.

"Ianto? Are you feeling okay? You look like hell…well, as much you can while still looking delectable in that suit."

Ianto rolled his eyes before leaning his body a little further away from Jack's. Something about those damn pheromones was completely messing with his senses. He could smell Jack's scent all around him and it brought back vivid pictures of the previous night's dream.

"I'm fine, Sir. I didn't realise you were back. I'll go make some coffee."

Ianto started to walk by Jack and suddenly he felt Jack's hand grab his. The touch was enough to drain every sense of restraint from his system.

There was no one else in reception except him and Jack, something that Ianto didn't fail to recognise the moment he'd seen Jack. After days of avoiding this very situation, he also didn't fail to notice the irony. The only time he'd been unable to avoid the circumstances and his defences were so far down that he was helpless to prevent himself from acting on his instincts. Without even stopping to think about what he was doing, he grabbed Jack by his shirt and greatcoat and slammed him to the wall, pinning him with his own body. He leaned forward, his lips brushing lightly against Jack's neck as he took a deep breath.

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Jack groaned, forgetting where they were as Ianto slammed him against the wall. His hands came up swiftly grasping Ianto's hair as the young man leaned into his neck. He felt the barest brush of Ianto's lips against his skin and his hips bucked forward completely against his will.

Ianto pulled away from him enough to look him in the eyes. What he saw in Ianto's expression made him draw in a deep breath and hold it just long enough to think that maybe he would die of asphyxiation. Ianto's eyes alone made him think that maybe he'd already died. They were dark, full of arousal, with a hint of anger around the edges.

The arousal he completely understood. Just that small dose of dominance in Ianto's actions had his cock hard and ready for anything the young man had in mind. But the anger, _**that**_ alarmed him. He'd never seen Ianto lose his temper at anything. For the brief amount of time he'd known Ianto, he'd been extremely steady in his emotions. Never shown anything stronger than frustration.

Ianto leaned forward and captured his lips in a rough kiss, his teeth biting hard at Jack's lower lip. His tongue shot out, fucking Jack's mouth at a fast and furious pace as it ran along Jack's teeth. Jack cried out, his grip tightening in Ianto's hair as he pulled the younger man closer to his body and pushed his own tongue into Ianto's mouth.

Ianto fought back, battling against Jack's tongue for dominance over the kiss, by driving it back into Jack's mouth. His body pushed into Jack's forcing him further against the wall. Jack groaned when he felt Ianto's hard cock press into his own, harsh and unyielding. His breathing sped up as Ianto pulled away from his mouth and attacked his neck, biting and sucking on every bit of skin his lips came in contact with.

"Fuck Ianto, what …" Jack groaned out.

His words were cut off as Ianto's mouth found his again. He felt Ianto's hands run down his chest, grasping at his clothes and tugging them roughly as he pushed at the fabric, trying to feel the skin beneath. He almost didn't realize what Ianto was doing until Ianto's hands bypassed his belt and undid the zip on his trousers. He felt the young's man hand slip inside them, finding nothing else but the rigid smooth flesh of his cock. Jack's hips bucked forward as Ianto grasped his erection and began pumping almost brutally.

Pleasure and a slight hint of pain exploded around his senses. Jack gasped, his hips arching into Ianto's hand. His eyes slammed shut, arousal so heavily clouding his mind that he could only react to the sensations ripping through his body. He could barely comprehend anything as he held on tightly to Ianto's hair. He felt Ianto reach around and grasp his arse through his trousers while his hips rocked back and forth at the savage pace Ianto had set. His body was coiling, his heart pounding as Ianto's teeth bit down into his neck.

Suddenly, without any warning, Ianto pulled away from him and took a few steps back. He stared at Jack, his face a mixture of horror and arousal.

"Bloody fucking hell! I'm sorry…I just…"

Ianto stopped and turned away from Jack. He ran through the door that led to the Hub without even glancing back.

"Ianto!"

Jack started to go after him, only stopping when he heard the elevator door close and begin its downward descent. He groaned and looked down. His clothes were completely wrinkled, his erection still straining as it pushed lewdly out of his trousers. It was the first time he could remember ever coming out of a sexual situation looking so chaotic. Normally it was his partner that looked completely rumpled, not him.

Jack took a deep breath as he put his clothes back together and tried to look a little more decent. He had no idea what had gotten into Ianto, but he _**definitely**_ liked it. He was going to have to figure it out if he ever wanted to get a repeat performance. Only next time he was going to make sure Ianto didn't run away from him. He didn't know if he'd ever been this turned on in his _**entire**_ long life.

Jack headed towards the elevator trying to think of anything to make his erection go away. When that failed him, he pulled his greatcoat closed and buttoned it. He knew he'd be walking funny but hopefully no one would notice.

He'd just have to sit in his office for awhile. Maybe during that time he could figure out exactly what the hell was going on with Ianto.

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Ianto ignored everyone when he walked into the Hub. He couldn't believe he'd just attacked Jack like that. To top everything off, he was still trying to get rid of his erection.

'_Thank god for suit coats.' _He thought as he rushed up the stairs and began to make coffee. If he'd had any choice in the matter, he'd just walk out and go to his loft or go visit Lisa. But for right now, he knew he couldn't leave.

He was completely horrified and still trying to figure out why Jack hadn't stopped him. He'd practically molested Jack without even meaning to!

'_Did you notice that Jack was actually enjoying it?'_ his conscience mind threw in randomly.

He stopped for a moment as he added the freshly ground coffee into the machine. It _**had**_ seemed like Jack was enjoying himself. Ianto heard the cog door roll open and chanced a glance down towards Jack. He had buttoned up his greatcoat and he appeared to have a slight stiffness to his walk. He saw Jack start to look up at him and turned away quickly before Jack caught him watching.

Ianto placed the cups on a tray and poured the coffee. He tried to focus on what everyone was talking about. It was nearly impossible. Between what had just happened and how tired he was he only managed to get a few things. Something about ghosts and a small alien metal object _'looks like a garage door opener'_ was all he was able to grasp with his muddled concentration. He heard Owen and Gwen arguing over it and realized he didn't care all that much. He was having enough issues of his own without adding theirs.

Ianto turned to head downstairs with the coffee and suddenly realized he had a problem. He was going to have to face Jack when he gave him his cup. The thought nearly made him drop the tray he was holding.

Well, he'd just have to make sure he didn't touch Jack again.

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"Well, we can't do anything more tonight. Why don't you all go home? Gwen and Owen can go tomorrow to check out Tom Flanagan and see if it's the same one as Gwen's apparition."

Jack glanced around the Hub as the team packed up and walked out the door. Ianto had disappeared not too long after he'd given them all coffee. He sighed as he tried to figure out where Ianto had vanished to. He really needed to talk to Ianto and find out what the hell was going on with him.

Jack turned and went into his office to check the CCTV. He had a feeling the young man was down in the archives, but wanted to make sure before he walked down there. What he saw when he found Ianto surprised him enough to make him drop into his chair. Ianto was sitting at his desk in the archives, with his head down in his arms. If Jack didn't know any better, he'd have sworn Ianto was asleep.

He knew he was delaying little, but there was something about what had happened earlier that was still bothering him. He couldn't figure out if it was the anger he'd seen in Ianto's eyes or the fact that Ianto had seemed so out of control, but he was certainly going to find out.

He stood up determinedly and walked towards the stairs that led to the archives.

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Ianto settled down further into his arms as he felt hands soothing him. He could feel someone running their hand gently through his hair while another hand ran softly over his neck. It was vaguely reminiscent of what Lisa used to do when they were lying in bed together half asleep. The hand on his neck ran down to stroke his cheek and he pushed further into the caress.

"Ianto?"

Jack's low whisper cut into his dream state but he only settled further into his position. Something about the sound of Jack's voice made him feel safe. He didn't want to analyse it, he just wanted to lay here and enjoy the feel of Jack's hands gently running over him. Nothing could touch him here. Not Lisa and her pain, not the double life he was leading, and certainly not the guilt that had been wracking him from the moment he woke up until the moment he went to sleep.

"Ianto, wake up."

He felt Jack press his lips tenderly against his ear and his eyes flew open. Jack pulled away from him and Ianto sat up in confusion. His eyes shot around, taking in his surroundings before settling on Jack.

Jack was kneeling next to him, his eyes gazing at Ianto, his face in an expression Ianto had never seen before. His sleep addled brain registered the fact that Jack's hand was on his cheek and he smiled drowsily at the man in front of him. It took a few second before he really understood what was going on and where he actually was. The moment he did he groaned aloud.

"Jack? What's going on?" Ianto said, his voice tinged with uncertainty.

Jack smiled at Ianto again before removing his hand from his cheek and speaking.

"You fell asleep Ianto. Is this why you att…acted so strange when we came back? Why didn't you just tell me you were tired and leave earlier?"

Ianto winced as Jack stuttered over his words. He knew Jack was going to say he attacked him, but he chose to ignore it. He swallowed dryly and shook his head.

"I knew you were going to need me here when you came back. I wanted to make sure you had your coffee."

Jack laughed, the sound cutting across Ianto's senses waking him up a little further.

"Ianto, we could have gotten coffee from the shop. Not that we don't prefer yours, but if you were this exhausted when we got back, I would have rather you went home to sleep."

Ianto started to stand and Jack reached over to help him. The gesture woke him up even more. Jack was being extremely gentle and…well, fairly affectionate with every touch. Ianto was completely disorientated and the very act of trying to figure out his motives was confusing him more. Jack was always about lust, not about caring. Even though Ianto knew he did care about his entire team, he still held himself back from personal affection. He'd never dug too deeply into the teams personal lives either. That factor, in all his research before even meeting Jack, had been one of the reasons he'd known that he could hide Lisa at the Hub in the first place.

Ianto shook his head lightly, ridding his mind of his thoughts. He was not going to try to analyse this right now. He was still exhausted and he was obviously imagining things.

"I'm sorry for falling asleep at work Sir. I think I should go home now."

He turned away from Jack, but stopped when Jack grabbed his hand. His eyes moved down to where their hands were joined and he shuddered as he realized the exact same gesture had provoked his actions earlier that evening. This time, however, he tried to gingerly disengage his hand.

Jack gripped it a little tighter, refusing to let it go, as he pulled Ianto slowly into his arms. His eyes locked with Ianto's sleepy ones and Ianto could almost feel something change between them. His heart stuttered in his chest when Jack leaned in slowly and brushed his lips against Ianto's.

He finally released Ianto and turned him towards the stairs.

"Go on Ianto. Please drive safely. I know you're still tired and I don't want anything to happen to you."

Ianto began to walk away and felt tears prick at his eyes. It was too much to handle. Between everything that was going on, he wasn't prepared for the tenderness that Jack was suddenly showing him. He didn't want to care about Jack more then he already did, he didn't need another complication added onto the ones that already consumed his life. He fought against the emotions that were inundating his fatigued mind and failed miserably.

He waited until he reached his car to let the tears fall down his cheeks. His shoulders shook with the silent sobs that took over as he sank down into the driver's seat.

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TBC


	9. Chapter 9 Sweet Spots Bury Bitter Regret

_**Warnings:**_ Not much…really. A little sex, a little bad language.

_AN: Okay, so I had to cut another chapter in half. Seriously, do you know how hard it is to write smut out in only one chapter? :D I tell you, I'm really starting to respect the man who brought down PM Harriet Jones's reign with just six words! (LOL)_

_Thanks everyone for all the reviews and PM's. I love some of the speculations on where this is going!_

_Thanks go, again, to mama rocks for the quick BETA and the perfect suggestions on a sentence that was driving me crazy. And for a wonderful suggestion for the title of this chapter (even if I did alter it a little...lol). She's bloody brilliant, I tell you! :D To everyone….Please don't kill me. Please?_

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Chapter 9 - Sweet Spots Bury Bitter Regrets

Ianto woke up to the harsh beeping of his alarm. He reached out and hit the snooze button without bothering to open his eyes. If today was anything like the past few weeks, he knew he didn't want to get out of bed.

'_It was much more pleasant waking up to Jack's voice last night.'_

Ianto groaned as the thought flickered across his mind. It was still too early to let that memory assail him. He'd come home prepared to sleep and instead had ended up lying in bed for half the night with his mind reeling. At least he'd still gotten more sleep than the previous night. He wouldn't have to try to fight against his own fucking actions in order to make it through the day.

He cracked his eyes open and winced as sharp pain hit his eyes, making them slam shut again. They felt extremely dry and it took him a moment to remember why. He really hated the way his emotions were tormenting him. It seemed like he'd done more crying in the past month than he had in his whole life. The thought irritated him almost more than anything else did.

Just as he was debating going back to sleep, his alarm went off again. This time he opened his eyes and glared at the object. He reached out and slammed his fist down on the clock hard enough to hear something crack inside of it, wincing when he realized he was probably going to have to replace it.

Today was not going to be a good day. He couldn't help but send a silent prayer that Doctor Tanizaki wouldn't be delayed. If everything when to schedule he would be arriving in just a few days time. Ianto didn't know how much longer he was going to be able to handle the constant way his emotions kept bouncing around. He knew that the only way out of this situation was to get through it as quickly as possible.

He slowly got out of bed, dreading the day ahead of him.

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Jack glanced over at Gwen as she taped up Bernie Harris's information. He heard Ianto's sarcastic comment come from behind him and nearly laughed at the young man's wit. He turned around to find Ianto holding out a bag and a tray of coffees to him. He thought about how odd it was that Ianto hadn't made the coffee that morning as he reached out to grab a coffee and one of the doughnuts. He had also arrived later than he ever had before which was even more peculiar considering Ianto's meticulous personality. He smiled and winked at Ianto in thanks, but only got a slight smile that didn't quite reach Ianto's eyes and a small nod in return.

Turning back to the computer, he pulled up the information on the machine it was analysing. He loved it when they found artifacts like this. Every single time, it amused him more than he liked to rest of the team to know. Still, as interested as was in the machine, he was also concerned about Ianto. He kept up with the team's discussion whilst he watched Ianto's trip around his office.

When he did, he noticed something that made him rather uncomfortable. Gwen took what Ianto offered with barely even a glance in his direction. If he didn't know any better, he would've sworn she thought the food and coffee just magically appeared in her hands. Tosh was the only other one who nodded at Ianto in thanks. However, she did it in such a way that he was sure Ianto missed it. Ianto didn't even go over to Owen, instead he set down the tray and bag and went to stand by one of the windows.

Jack sat back in his chair and continued eating. He looked around at his team and felt a sliver of annoyance. They all acted almost as if Ianto was completely invisible. Even when he made a comment about the way estate agents pronounced Splott, they barely glanced at him.

He stood up suddenly.

"Tosh, Gwen, and Owen lets go find Bernie Harris. Start with what we know."

He turned towards where Ianto had been standing only to catch a glimpse of the young man walking out of his office and heading towards the elevator to go up to Reception. He sighed as he grabbed his greatcoat and followed the rest of the team out of his office.

If they didn't find Bernie Harris he was going to be highly irritated.

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Ianto stood in the shadows, watching while Jack went through weapons training with Gwen. As he observed the pair he tried to figure out what the feeling twisting in his gut was. When Jack ran his hand down Gwen's arm and pulled her close, he felt the feeling twist again and his hands clenched into fists at his side. He had a bitter taste in the back of his throat.

He was completely jealous, and he didn't like the feeling one bit.

Ianto's mind drifted back to his thoughts from two nights ago. He shuddered as the same images flipped through his mind of Gwen comforting Jack. This time there were no comforting images of him and Jack together to wipe them from his mind. He was starting to come to the conclusion that he was a lot more insignificant when it came to Jack. The only thing that Jack would ever want from him was a shag. Ianto knew if Jack ever got that he'd probably never even glance at him again.

Still Ianto watched. He drew in a deep breath when Jack stood moving forward on his own, firing the gun as he went. That image sent a thrill down Ianto's spine, lust invaded him. Jack looked so fucking hot when he focused like that. The picture burned into his brain, making his back stiffen and his cock harden. Gwen or no Gwen, he wanted to go out there, grab Jack and kiss him until they were both came, moaning and thrusting against one another.

Instead he turned away from the firing range and made his way slowly towards Lisa's room. As much as he hated to leave, he couldn't take anymore of Jack's hands on Gwen's body. Jack kept gripping Gwen's shoulders, touching her every time he helped her stand in the correct position. His movements looked anything but casual to Ianto eyes.

As soon as he reached Lisa's room he climbed up the side of her machinery and kissed her softly on the lips. She opened her eyes and he grimaced slightly. He never knew if that was just a reaction to the machines, medicines, or if she was actually awake.

"Ianto?" Her voice sounded strained.

He stood next to her as her eyes shifted towards him.

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Jack glanced up from his computer, watching as Ianto walked across the Hub and sat down at Tosh's computer. Everyone on the team had left for the evening, and he was surprised to see Ianto still there. He studied Ianto for a moment before standing up to go to him.

He'd seen Ianto's shadow when he slipped away from the firing range earlier. He'd known the young man was watching them. He'd even taken the time to put on a small show for Ianto.

Ianto had left without even showing his presence to him and Gwen. He had to wonder why.

When he reached Ianto he ran his hands down the young man's back. Instead of the shiver or groan he normally got, he felt Ianto's body stiffen.

Jack stared at the back of Ianto's head in confusion. Not only was it the first time he'd failed to get a response, but Ianto didn't even turn around. He just kept typing.

Jack leaned forward and ran his lips softly over Ianto's ear, his hand coming up to rest on the lower part of Ianto's back. He wanted a response, something other than that damnable typing. He was completely shocked as Ianto pulled away from his lips, before turning around and staring at Jack with a hard look on his face.

"Sir? Did you need something?" Ianto's voice was flat, his emotions reflecting the expression on his face.

"Ianto, are you okay?"

Jack clenched his hands at his side and looked down at Ianto in puzzlement while he asked the question.

Ianto turned away from Jack and began to type on the keyboard again.

"I'm fine Sir. Just trying to get this finished before I leave."

Jack reached out and grabbed the stool Ianto was sitting on. He turned him back toward him and stared into Ianto's face. Ianto avoided his gaze focusing instead somewhere over Jack's shoulder.

"Damn it Ianto. What the hell is wrong? Why the fuck won't you tell me?"

Jack saw Ianto flinch as his voice raised. He brought his hand up and ran the back of his fingers over a part of Ianto's cheek that had twitched.

The soft gesture was just enough to get Ianto to look at him, finally acknowledging him as his blue eyes clashed with Jack's. Jack studied the depths of those eyes, trying to find out what it was that Ianto was hiding from him.

There was so much of Ianto that still puzzled him, but he found answers. Maybe not to all of his questions, but certainly to some of them. Jack saw jealousy, pain, and hurt, but the need and desire in his eyes overwhelmed everything else.

Jack smiled softly as his hand turned against Ianto's cheek and cupped it in his palm. He started to close the distance between their lips when Ianto beat him to it. He saw Ianto's eyes close as the young man leaned further in, pressed his mouth firmly against Jack's, and moaned against his lips.

Jack kept one hand on Ianto's cheek, deepening the kiss as he did so. He tongue tangled tantalisingly with Ianto's as he raised his other hand, and loosened the tie Ianto had on, pulling it away completely when the end slid smoothly out of the knot. He started to drop it, thought better of it and reached around Ianto to place it on Tosh's desk. His hand came back and undid the top few buttons of Ianto's dress shirt. He ran his fingers over the skin he exposed, caressing Ianto's neck.

Jack pulled away from their kiss, running his lips over Ianto's cheek before coming to Ianto's ear and locking his teeth over the lobe, his tongue flicking out to lave the skin between them.

Ianto chuckled and Jack heard him whisper just loud enough for him to hear.

"What is with you and my ears?"

Jack laughed lightly, the released oxygen ghosting into Ianto's ear.

He wasn't prepared for the young man's reaction. Ianto gasped deeply, sucking in air until his chest was completely full. He raised his arms and locked his hands onto Jack's shirt. His hands yanked Jack's braces off his shoulders and ran roughly to his hips before curving around and grabbing Jack's arse to pull him between his legs. Not stopping there, Ianto grasped the bottom of Jack's shirts, dragging both out of his trousers, then moved his hands under to run over the skin of his abdomen.

Jack smiled as he realised he'd found one of Ianto's weaknesses, one of those seductive sweet spots or actions that nearly everyone had a predilection for. Jack ran his tongue into the curve of Ianto's ear and deliberately exhaled into it softly as he whispered, "Seems to me that you actually like it Ianto."

Ianto groaned loudly, releasing the air he'd been holding in his chest. His hips began to rock forward repeatedly, settling into a rhythmic thrusting that made their rigid erections collide against one another. Jack laved his tongue around the edge of Ianto's ear before going back to the centre and blowing into it again.

Ianto was suddenly panting, the air heaving in and out of his body in harsh gasps. Jack could hear a soft keening sound coming from Ianto's throat as he moved his mouth across to his other ear and gave it the same treatment, before blowing softly into it.

Ianto moaned harshly, whimpering and gripping onto Jack's body tighter, almost hard enough to bruise the skin. Jack ran his hand around to the nape of Ianto's neck and turned it sideways to have better access. He suckled every part of the soft flesh, running his tongue over the outer edge of Ianto's ear, then thrust his tongue harshly into it. He moved his fingers to Ianto's other ear and stroked it, whilst his mouth continued to torture the first by blowing a little harder.

Ianto nearly screamed.

"Oh God! Oh fuck! No more. I can't…"

Lust filled Jack's body at the sound of Ianto's cries, suffusing everywhere. His cock grew harder, pressing almost painfully against the zip of his trousers. Jack felt Ianto shudder, his body spasming against Jack's, his hips coiling over and over, as they rocked faster against Jack's.

Jack moved down from his ear and attacked the skin of Ianto's neck. His teeth latched on, sucking and biting, as he tried to taste every bit of skin he could find. He pulled his hand off Ianto's neck and quickly undid the buttons of Ianto's waistcoat, then just as rapidly undid the rest of the buttons of Ianto's dress shirt.

He pulled his mouth reluctantly away from Ianto's neck and groaned in frustration as his hand encountered Ianto's undershirt.

"You wear too damn many clothes."

Ianto laughed lustily, the sound hitting Jack's ears causing even more blood to rush down to his cock. His voice shook with arousal as he breathily replied between gasps of air, "You're the one who keeps saying I look good in a suit."

Jack leaned forward, blowing in Ianto's ear again, as he reached onto Tosh's workstation and grabbed a pair of scissors. Ianto bucked his hips up, his eyes slamming shut. He brought his hand forward quickly, whilst Ianto still had his eyes closed and cut the top of the undershirt.

Ianto's eyes flew open at the sound. Jack dropped the scissors on the floor, grabbed the sliced edges of the shirt and ripped it all the way down. His hands travelled down Ianto's chest, trailing through the sparse hair covering it, digging his blunt nails into the skin.

"Much better." Jack stated to Ianto's stunned expression before dropping forward and locking his lips around his hard nipple.

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TBC

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_AN: If I said "Please don't kill me." again would anyone listen? _

_Sorry but the wait for next chapter is **well** worth it. At least I've heard it is… :D_


	10. Chapter 10 Once Given Freely

_AN: __I tried all day Saturday to put this up by the site was having serious issues. Finally got it up after a long battle and a total workaround that I managed to find on LiveJournal. I had to replace an old document with the new chapter. Now it's just a matter of keeping straight on which one is actually chapter 10! __So don't blame me that the wait was so long. :(_

_Thanks go to mama rocks for the quickest BETA job I've ever seen...lol._

_Um…yeah. :D_

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Chapter 10 - Once Given Freely

Ianto chuckled softly, the sound turning into a low groan as Jack's tongue hit a particularly sensitive spot on his torso. Jack ran his lips up Ianto's chest and he arched his head back, pleasure exploding throughout his body. He felt teeth graze his skin, before they latched on and Jack sucked hard at his neck. The sensation travelled down his body, his cock throbbing against Jack's.

His right hand drifted up Jack's chest and over his shoulders, twisting tightly in the hair at the nape of Jack's neck as he pulled his head closer to him. Rough gun calloused fingertips stroked his skin mere seconds after Jack's mouth, causing his hips to buck up into the other man's. It felt like every ounce of blood in his body had suddenly rushed south as his cock swelled, harder than he had ever been before.

Every wet or seductive dream that he'd had of Jack, hadn't even come close to how this really felt. Every touch from Jack's hands, every rough flick of his tongue, every thrust of their cocks against each others, pooled in his abdomen, nearly enough to make him come from the sensations alone.

Ianto could feel a part of himself rebelling, telling him that they shouldn't be doing this. That **_he_** shouldn't be doing this. He'd been avoiding Jack for this very reason. However, right now, he just wanted to feel Jack, to have something to remember him by that was his and his alone. Not sex or lust, because Jack gave those out almost freely to nearly anyone he was attracted to. No, he wanted a memory, a memory that he could lock away from everyone, even Lisa.

He wanted more. He **_needed_** more.

His hand gripped against Jack's waist, pulling as Ianto bucked his hips forward at the feel of Jack's mouth teasing around his chest. His mind kept trying to rebel against the sensations, to try to figure out what this whole situation was leading up to. He moaned loudly the moment he felt Jack's teeth lock around his nipple, biting down again. It was too much effort to think. It was so much easier to feel.

Jack licked his way around his chest and began to tease the other nipple in the same way he had the first. Ianto felt his hips thrusting against Jack's, knowing that he was completely out of control. He'd tried to stop once already, tried to make his traitorous body listen to him. Then Jack had blown into his ear and it felt like his brain had completely shorted out. He knew that until he actually got a bigger part of Jack, he was at his mercy.

Ianto suddenly realized that unless he took whatever he could now, he might never get the chance. He'd been sitting there, just letting Jack touch him, while his own hand stayed on Jack's hip and in his hair.

He needed to feel Jack's body.

Though the soft strands of Jack's hair against his fingers felt nice, it wasn't nearly enough. He dropped his hand down, his fingers shaking faintly as he slipped the buttons of Jack's dress shirt through each hole. He suddenly understood Jack's irritation earlier as he encountered Jack's undershirt. He groaned aloud in frustration.

Jack pulled back minutely, keeping their hips firmly together as he looked up and gave Ianto an impious grin.

"Want some scissors Ianto?"

Ianto smirked at him as he ran his hand from Jack's hip to the front of his trousers, squeezing the hard flesh encased within. Jack moaned, dropping his head into his torso, biting down harder on his nipple than he had previously. He bucked his hips forward causing the back of Ianto's hand to brush against his own turgid erection. Ianto's body tightened for a moment, his hand grasping Jack's cock harder in reflex.

"Fuck Ianto!" Jack cried out roughly, his voice muffled slightly against Ianto's hard chest.

He lost his grip as Jack pulled away from him and he snarled loudly in protest. He was so fucking tired of Jack leaving him like this.

"Christ Jack, not this shite again! Am I not ready again? What the fuck more do you want from me?" Ianto cried out angrily.

Jack stood in front of him, staring down at him with an unusual expression on his face. Ianto saw his eyes darken even further, his lids at half mast, as he studied him. He leaned forward, his gaze never leaving Ianto's as he grasped his hands and pulled him to his feet. Ianto gasped and moaned at the same time when Jack fell to his own knees before him. They finally broke eye contact as Jack dropped his gaze to the front of Ianto's trousers.

He looked down at Jack, his dark hair shining under the bright light of the Hub, his heart thudding heavily in his chest. Seeing his boss on his knees before him was affecting him more than he ever thought it would. There was a subtle hint of submission in the pose he was holding, even though Ianto knew that Jack was, for all intents and purposes, the one in control.

Jack pushed against Ianto's hips, backing his body up until it hit the edge of Tosh's workstation. His hands came up to grasp the edge of it as Jack raised his own hands, running them over the shape of Ianto's erection through his trousers. Jack's fingers mapped the bulge in his trousers, finding the edges before gripping him firmly in their hot grasp, then relaxing but still keeping his hand on his cock. Jack repeated the motion several times. Every time Jack's hand squeezed, Ianto's hands clenched and unclenched on the edge of the workstation.

Ianto heard a steady whimpering coming from somewhere, started to look around the room until briefly realising that it was coming from his own lips. Whenever Jack tightened his hand, the noise got a little louder, a little needier, until Ianto was nearly keening.

Jack grasped him firmly through the material, this time yanking upwards in a hard motion, and Ianto's whole body tensed, a coarse moan expelling forcibly from his own mouth. His hands gripped the workstation even tighter until he could barely feel them. He watched as Jack ran his tongue out over his lips then bit down firmly on the lower one in concentration, repeating the hard stroke again several times. Jack's eyes follow the movements before he turned them up to Ianto and smiled wickedly.

Jack released him suddenly and Ianto's hips rocked forward at the loss of contact and heat. Before Ianto's lust filled mind could even comprehend what had happened, Jack had already unbuckled his belt, and undone the catch and zip of his trousers. Jack's hands ran around his hips, tugging his trousers and briefs down in one swift move, exposing his heated flesh to the cold air. He felt Jack stop tugging when they reached his ankles. Jack pressed against his ankles spreading his legs as much as possible.

Ianto cried out loudly as Jack leaned forward close enough for his breath to ghost over his tumid flesh. Every breath ran down his cock hardening it to an almost painful state. He saw Jack lick his lips when a drop of precome suddenly appeared on the tip of his cock and Ianto couldn't take anymore.

"Oh god, Jack. I can't…"

Ianto's eyes slammed shut, head whipping frantically back and forth, his words nearly a plea as he tried not to come from the image alone. He couldn't take anymore. He couldn't escape Jack's lips this close to his cock, or the look in his eyes as he stared at Ianto hungrily, like wanted to consume him until nothing was left.

It was too much. Ianto gasped suddenly, nearly in tears from the pleasure. His body tensed, his balls drawing up closer to his body, his heart thundered in his chest as his fingers clawed at the workstation behind him.

Jack swiftly reached his hand up and gripped the base of Ianto's cock, squeezing firmly and Ianto felt like the world imploded around him. He was panting harshly, drawing in deep breaths of air. The pleasure of Jack's hand on him was overwhelming his senses, the slight pain of his grip enough to stop him from coming, but not enough to ease the sensations.

"Not yet Ianto. I have a much better place for you to come." Jack said, his voice somehow rough and sedutive at the same time.

Ianto shuddered as Jack's words penetrated his lust filled mind.

At the first flick of Jack's tongue against his heated flesh, Ianto's hips rocked forward. He felt like he was drowning in pleasure, a flood of sensation that wrapped around his body and pulled him further and further down.

Jack moved forward, taking him deep into the tight wet warmth of his mouth and Ianto surrendered himself to the depths.

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Jack ran his eyes up the hard planes and muscles of Ianto's chest as he took the young man's cock deep into his mouth. He was still reeling slightly from Ianto's outburst earlier. He had fully intended to walk away from the young man, to tell him he still wasn't ready. However, the moment Ianto yelled at him, he knew that if he didn't take this seduction to the next level, Ianto would probably walk away from him. There was only so much anticipation that the young man could take. He smiled and flicked his tongue out to taste the skin moving languidly in an out of his mouth.

His fingers still gripped the base of Ianto's cock, stopping him from coming, but also holding it secure so that he could move his mouth over the hard flesh. He released Ianto's erection from his mouth, running his lips along the edge of it before pulling back completely.

"Ianto?"

He watched the young man take a deep breath before he nodded his head in acquiescence. Jack released his hand slowly, not wanting any of this to end too soon. Ianto groaned softly, but maintained his control and Jack took that moment to study the young man standing in front of him. As he did, he nearly laughed in seductive amusement.

Jack couldn't remember a time when he had ever seen Ianto look so disheveled, or delectable. His dress shirt was completely wrinkled, his undershirt hanging open, the tattered edges hanging down around him and moving with each shuddering breath that Ianto took. His body was flushed, a fine sheen of sweat covering it. Jack ran his eyes over every slick bit of flesh that they could see before moving up and locking on Ianto's darkened blue-grey gaze.

Jack leaned forward his tongue running around, then into Ianto's belly button. The taste hit his tongue, salt and sweat mixed together to invade his senses. He brought his hands up, to run over the skin, his ears listening to every harsh gasp coming from Ianto's mouth. Jack ran his fingers over the firm skin of Ianto's hips before moving them further up his chest. His hands stopped to tweak the hardened nipples they encountered and Ianto threw his head back as he cried out, his hips thrusting forward.

Ianto's cock was leaking heavily by now, but Jack ignored it.

"Ianto?" Jack said, just soft enough to be heard over the harsh panting in the air.

He didn't hear a response so he tried again.

"Ianto?"

Ianto looked down at him and Jack smiled at the confused expression on his face.

"What do you want Ianto?"

"Wha…Jack?"

Jack shook his head at the sound. He could nearly come just from hearing that voice fall from Ianto's lips. He stood up in front of Ianto, well aware that the young man was near completely nude, or as close to it as possible, while he still had all of clothes on.

He leaned in close to the young man, breathing against his lips as he spoke again slowly.

"What do you want Ianto?"

"Fuck Jack," Ianto replied, arousal heavy in his voice, "anything. Please god, just touch me again!"

Jack smirked at the young man before him.

"No love. I don't think you're quite ready for **_anything_**…yet."

Jack ran the tip of his finger down Ianto's erection as he spoke, circling the head when he got to the end.

He saw Ianto shudder at his words and watched as what Jack wanted finally clicked in his mind. Ianto leaned forward, his lips capturing Jack's for a brief moment before pulling away.

"Ple…please suck my cock Jack." He uttered in a hoarse whisper.

Jack laughed coarsely as he dropped back to his knees.

"All you had to do was ask."

Without any further preliminaries, he swallowed Ianto's erection down his throat and Ianto nearly screamed. Jack drew his head back, laving his tongue along the crown before plunging back down. He saw Ianto gripping the desk behind him and Jack reached out to grasp his hands in his own, bringing them to his head. Ianto's fingers curled tightly into his hair as he pulled Jack's head forward into the thrust of his hips.

Jack kept one hand on Ianto's hip, gripping it possessively as he ran his other hand up Ianto's thigh, stopping for a brief moment to cup his balls in his palm. He pulled his mouth off Ianto's shaft long enough to run his finger over the head, wetting it down, before engulfing his erection once more.

Jack kept his head moving over Ianto's erection, his tongue snaking out to caress the head every time he pulled back. He moved his hand back between Ianto's arse cheeks, spreading them with his fingers as he circled the small opening between with his wet fingertip, before lightly applying pressure. Ianto's erection throbbed in his mouth, stuttering against his lips, and he knew the young man was not going to last much longer.

He could hear Ianto's voice chanting above him and he hummed in pleasure as he realised that he was saying Jack's name over and over. He moved his head steadily up and down as he pressed his finger into the opening a little further, just enough to reach Ianto's prostate, and stroke it softly.

Ianto's body froze, shuddering as his erection twitched erratically against Jack's tongue. He cried out as he came, his words jumbled as he gripped Jack's hair tighter in his hand and tried to simultaneously thrust his hips forward and push back on the invading digit.

"OHMYFUCKINGGODJACK!"

Jack felt his own body stutter with pleasure as the bittersweet taste of Ianto's come coated his tongue. He swallowed it greedily, refusing to lose a single drop. He just barely recovered enough before Ianto collapsed in his arms, sinking them both to the floor.

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Ianto lay sedately on the ground. He was having a hard time concentrating, and laughed when he realised he'd never felt this fulfilled in his whole life. He felt Jack move up next to him, kissing his neck before his fingers turned his head towards him, so he could softly kiss his lips.

"You know Ianto, I think you may have just enjoyed that." Jack said with a smug smile on his face.

He smiled down at Jack lazily, for the first time in his life, not in least worried about how undignified he may have looked.

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TBC

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_An: That's it. I give. That's the last time I fight against the guys taking over the chapter. The story is all theirs from now on. They can do whatever the hell they want. Obviously they don't need my help._


	11. Chapter 11 Making Mistakes

_AN: Okay, I really didn't mean to do this, but there's a little (very minute) Gwen bashing in this chapter. It was totally not my intention, but it's a follow up of the previous days issue and she's the only one who I could use for it cause the action is just not like Tosh. BTW…this is a rather angst heavy chapter…_

_Thanks to__** mama rocks**__ for another quick BETA job and for reassuring me that my Americanisms weren't as bad as I thought at first._

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Chapter 11 - Making Mistakes

Ianto woke up to the sound of his new alarm clock beeping in his ear. He reached over and lightly flicked the button to turn it off, before sinking back down into his bed. He really didn't want to get up and face the day. He remembered going though the same motions the previous day and groaned sardonically under his breath.

Just yesterday, he had woken up, broken his alarm clock, and been in a generally contemptuous mood. Today he was nearly horrified at his own actions, his guilt so bloody intense that he wasn't sure he'd ever feel redeemed. Within a matter of twenty-four hours he'd completely managed to fuck up his life beyond repair.

He had no idea how he was going to face Jack or Lisa when he went in to work.

Ianto closed his eyes, pulling his duvet over his head and sinking further down the bed. He shuddered slightly, his mind forcing the images from the previous night back into his thoughts. The whole thing almost seemed like a dream, but he knew it wasn't. His dreams of Jack hadn't been in the same proximity to the very real feeling of Jack's mouth on his cock.

'_Bloody hell, you actually asked him to suck you off! You practically begged him to do it!'_ he thought with sickening clarity.

Ianto rolled over burying his head in his pillow, the duvet falling down to his lower back. His hands grasped the pillow as he groaned into it. He was having an exceedingly hard time forcing the images out of his mind. Pictures which at any other time of his life, would have seemed like lust induced delusions. Jack on his knees in front of him, his eyes staring up at Ianto's as he leaned in to take his cock in his mouth. That same mouth moving swiftly up and down, the sight of his own fingers twisting Jack's hair as he held on and drove into that warm wet cavern again and again.

The whole event was like an endless film repeating in his mind.

Ianto groaned aloud again, rolling back over and covering his face with his hands. He could feel a stir in his groin, his cock hardening at the memories.

'_Jack does have one hell of a talented mouth. Whatever the hell he did towards the end, when he pushed his finger in you, __**that**__ had made you see bright flashing lights. A galaxy's worth of stars that you were still seeing for a good long while, even after he had swallowed every ounce of come you shot down his throat.'_

Ianto's hands moved away from his face. He moved his right hand down under the duvet, having lost all the will to even think about what he was doing, much less stop himself from continuing. His fingers stroked down his chest, running through the coarse hairs, his nails scratching lightly against his skin the same way Jack's had. He dipped his thumb into his belly button, his mind envisioning it as Jack's tongue. He moved his hand further down, under the waistband of his shorts and grasped his hard cock in his palm.

His other hand followed the first under the cover, stopping to tweak at his hard pebbled nipples. He closed his eyes, not wanting to admit how much he really wanted Jack, how much their one intense sexual experience was making him crave even more like it. He kept the duvet covering his actions, as if it could hide his transgression, as though it would keep this a secret.

He moved his hand swiftly up and down his erection, running his thumb over the tip as he remembered Jack's tongue doing the same thing. Every time he'd pulled back from Ianto's cock that rough tongue had flicked over and stroked the tip of it.

Ianto moved his hand quicker, adding a hard twist as he reached the base. His hips began thrusting into his palm, precome leaking heavily. The liquid made his hand a slick glove as it moved over his flesh, the feeling so reminiscent of Jack's wet mouth that he nearly screamed. His body stuttered, his hips thrusting forward one last time before he came so hard he practically passed out. Warm fluid covered his hand, coating the inside of the shorts he'd worn to bed.

"Fuck yes Jack!" he cried out in a guttural moan, the sound echoing around his bare empty bedroom.

He lay there few a few minutes afterwards, his chest heaving as he tried to catch his breath. Suddenly anger and frustration surged through his body. He threw the covers off his body and stood up trying to escape his own actions. He stalked over to his wardrobe, hastily searching through it to find an outfit to wear.

"_Admit it Ianto, that really had been the best blowjob you've ever had. He made you come harder than you ever have before. It was even more superior than that one time when Lisa had…"_

He cut the thought off abruptly, his heart stuttering as he thought about how much it would hurt Lisa if she ever found out. He really didn't want to start comparing Lisa and Jack. He was having enough issues as it was. He didn't need to add to the compounded guilt he was already going to feel when he went to visit her.

Ianto yanked his sticky shorts off his body angrily and threw them at the laundry bin in the corner. He felt his frustration level shoot up another notch when they fell short and landed on the floor. Walking over he picked them up and shoved them to the bottom, underneath everything else. He knew that until he washed his clothes he didn't want to see those shorts again.

He grabbed a towel and stomped into the loo, slamming the door so hard behind him that the frame shook.

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Jack was in a good mood.

He couldn't help it. Every time he closed his eyes he remembered the way Ianto had responded to him. The feel of his soft skin, the look of his body covered in that soft sheen of sweat, and the forceful way he'd thrust his hips pushing his cock deep into Jack's throat as he'd brought him over the edge, was more passionate than any other lover he could remember having.

He'd certainly had a lot over all the years, but not one of them, that he could remember, had ever been able to push Jack into an orgasm at the same time without even trying. His actions were so uninhibited and exuberant that Jack had wanted to grab the young man and hide him away so he wouldn't have to share him with anyone else… _**ever**_. And God, the way that Ianto had screamed as he came was still echoing in Jack's mind.

The only negative that he could think of was when he had asked Ianto if he wanted to stay the night with him in his bed. The young man had declined, politely of course, stating that he needed to go home to his loft so he would have a change of clothes. Jack had told him no one would notice, but Ianto had looked down at his torn undershirt and looked back at him with his eyebrow raised.

Jack remembered laughing at the expression, but feeling more disappointed than he'd wanted to admit. After everything, he really wanted to spend more time with Ianto. The young man was really starting to get inside him in a way that no one else had in a very long time. Almost longer then he could remember.

Ianto was quickly becoming an addiction for him. Only it was a good addiction because Ianto wasn't a disappointment in any way he could see. Jack was fairly certain that Ianto wouldn't let him down. He'd already proven that once when he'd been the only one not breaking the rules.

Sure, he was secretive, but no more so than Jack was himself.

Jack hummed to himself as he got dressed and waited for the team to come into work. He had a good feeling about the day. He just knew that after his luck from the previous night with Ianto, they were going to make progress on the quantum transducer today.

'_Hell, we might even find Bernie Harris!'_ he thought blithely.

He was leaning back in his chair, his eyes closed, and hands resting behind his head when the alarms went off indicating that someone was walking through the cog door. He looked over and felt a small twinge of disappointment when he saw Tosh sit down at her workstation.

Tosh stood at her desk for a moment with her head tilted. Jack felt a moment of panic as he realised that he must have missed something when he was putting her workstation back together the night before. When she reached down he saw her hand bring up Ianto's tie, holding it in front of her.

He nearly burst out with laughter at the mystified look on her face. He quickly put his head down and pulled some paperwork in front of him before she could see him, but continued to watch her under his eyelashes. She stared at the tie for a few moments then folded it and put it on the edge of her workstation.

Jack smiled. It was definitely going to be a good day.

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The moment Ianto saw the Millennium Centre he nearly had a panic attack. The closer he got to work, or more specifically Jack Harkness, the further his vexation rose. He really didn't want to have to deal with anything or anyone there. The very thought of having to look Lisa in the eye and pretend that nothing was wrong made him almost physically ill.

As he parked his car and walked towards the entrance he tried to force his mind off Jack and back onto Lisa. The problem was he just wasn't sure what to feel anymore. He wanted so much to help Lisa, to make her better and just be with her, but he didn't know how much longer he could handle the way his life was going. He was nearly ready to just walk away from it all. If he hadn't already put so much effort into saving Lisa he would have. There was also the fact that he loved Lisa and couldn't just abandon her to the mercy of Torchwood.

'_I haven't exactly been acting like I love her lately, have I?'_ he thought with a hint of irritation.

As he entered the elevator to go into the Hub he tried to focus on Lisa and why this whole thing had started. He knew that she hadn't intentionally let this happen, but he was starting to really resent her and the position she had put him in.

He tried to convince himself that none of this was her fault, but in a way it _**was**_, she was partially responsible. She had insisted on going back inside Torchwood London when the bloody Cybermen were taking over. If she had only run away when he asked her, hell, when he'd practically _**begged**_ her to, they would have gotten out. They would have both been fine and he wouldn't be so fucking confused now. He would never have researched Torchwood Three. They would probably have stayed in London and he would have _**never**_ come back to Cardiff.

He would have never met Captain Jack Harkness.

Ianto tried to pull his thoughts together when the cog door rolled open in front of him. He kept his eyes straight ahead, not even glancing around the Hub as he walked towards the stairs to get to his coffee machine. It _**was**_ his because not long after Jack had hired him, Owen made a comment about how Jack had bought it so that Ianto could make decent coffee without having to fight the old 12 cup standard maker that they had barely used.

Just as he began to pass by Tosh's workstation she called out to him.

"Ianto?"

He turned towards her trying to put a smile on his face.

"Yes Tosh?"

She held out something to him and he felt his face burn, realising a moment too late that she probably had _**no idea**_ why he was blushing in the first place. In her hands was the tie that Jack had taken off him the previous night. He hadn't even realised he'd forgotten it.

'_Yeah Ianto, because Jack makes you forget about everything, doesn't he? He certainly made you forget all about Lisa when he gave you the most intense blowjob you've had in your life.'_

Ianto thanked her quickly not even looking towards Jack's office. He shoved the tie in his pocket as he rushed up the stairs.

If he didn't get Lisa and himself the hell out of Torchwood he was going to utterly lose his God damned mind.

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Jack watched Ianto as Tosh handed him his tie and tried not to laugh. He lost the battle a moment later when Ianto rushed up the stairs, his face a brilliant scarlet. The fact that Tosh's face got even more bewildered at the young man's reaction made the whole situation even more amusing.

He chuckled thinking it would be low enough so that Tosh wouldn't hear him, noticing he failed when she glanced into his office and gave him a slightly disapproving look. It took him a moment to finally calm down and when he did he realised that something about Ianto's reaction wasn't nearly as funny as he'd first thought.

'_Is he really that embarrassed?' _he wondered, suddenly worried.

Jack heard the cog alarms go off again as Gwen walked into the Hub and sat down at her workstation. She called out to everyone, greeting them before turning towards her computer. She obviously didn't notice that the atmosphere in the Hub was a little different from most mornings. Jack saw her pull the quantum transducer out of her handbag, trying to cover her actions so that no one would see and felt a small shard of anger go through him. After everything that had happened with Suzie and she had taken the damn thing home.

He made a mental note to discuss the rules with her before turning his attention back to Ianto. The young man was still upstairs making coffee. He was taking a lot longer than normal. Just as Jack was getting ready to go upstairs and see if Ianto was okay, he turned around and started walking down the stairs holding a tray full of coffees.

Ianto dropped a cup off at Tosh's desk and Jack heard her soft voice thank him. He felt a small token of appreciation towards her. She at least had spoken this time, giving Ianto a little more attention than the previous day. He went to Gwen's workstation next and Jack felt another shot of irritation that overrode his gratitude towards Tosh. Once more, Gwen failed to even acknowledge that Ianto had just given her something. She just picked up the cup and sipped from it, like it was a given that it would appear next to her.

He quickly dropped his thoughts when Ianto turned towards his office and walked in to set down his cup. Ianto didn't say anything as he turned away from Jack and started to walk out. Jack reached out and grabbed Ianto's arm before he could get too far.

"Ianto, are you…" he paused as he tried to find the right words without Gwen and Tosh knowing what he was asking.

"Is everything okay? You don't regret anything do you?" he finally asked in a low voice.

Ianto glanced towards him with a small smile that was obviously forced.

"I'm fine Sir. I'm just going to Reception now."

Jack didn't fail to notice Ianto's evasion of his second question. He stared at Ianto as the young man turned abruptly away from him and walked out of Jack's office. He watched Ianto drop the tray onto Owen's workstation as he all but fled out the cog door.

Jack's good mood from earlier suddenly disappeared. He sighed as an unexpected wave of frustration hit him. He stood up prepared to go and confront Ianto when his phone beeped indicating he had a message. He started to ignore it, until he realised that Owen was still absent from the Hub. He didn't want to take the chance that something had happened to the young doctor so he finally picked up his phone and checked the message. It was from Owen saying he had found Bernie Harris.

'_Well at least one thing turned out like I expected it to.'_ he thought sarcastically as he called out to tell Tosh and Gwen.

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Ianto paced back and forth in reception, trying to figure out how he was going handle Jack when he came up to confront him. He knew that Jack wouldn't let him leave the way he had without coming after him. Jack always had to get to the bottom of things, even if he didn't get the answers, he at least tried to.

'_Did you have to be so evasive? You actually hurt him. You did notice that expression on his face as you left. Even if he did make an attempt to hide it.' _

The thought made Ianto sit down on the closest hard surface nearby. Thankfully it was his own chair.

He jumped back up suddenly when he saw Tosh and Gwen coming through the door that led from the Hub. They walked by him as Tosh called out that Owen had found the kid they were looking for and they were going to talk to him.

Ianto picked up his phone the moment they left and dialed Doctor Tanizaki. When the doctor answered Ianto told him about the reservations he'd made for him and double checked to see that he was going to arrive on time. When Ianto hung up the phone, he sighed with relief.

As the day progressed, Jack was too busy to confront him. Ianto was grateful, if a little disappointed, that he wouldn't have to explain himself to Jack. Later that evening they stood in Jack's office, he practically chugged down a glass of alcohol before taking the quantum transducer from Jack and putting it in the secure archives. After Jack took off with Gwen somewhere, Ianto had excused himself and left to go visit Lisa before heading home. He felt a thrill of anticipation as he realised that he was finally going to get out of Torchwood and away from his confused feelings about his current predicament.

Even though guilt was consuming him at the thought of what Jack was going to do when Ianto disappeared.

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TBC

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_AN: I'm gonna be in trouble with the next chapter. I want everyone to promise me now, before I post it, that when it goes up no one will threaten me...lol._


	12. Chapter 12 Unsurety and Damnation

_AN: Thanks goes to mama rocks for her excellent BETA job and questioning my dictionary. :D As I do have a tendency to use some awful strange words sometimes. _

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Chapter 12 - Unsurety and Damnation

Jack sat dejectedly at his desk, staring at the metal wristband lying in front of him. He had taken it out a few hours before and still couldn't figure out if he actually wanted to use it. He wasn't worried about Ianto getting suspicious, well actually he was, but that wasn't what was stopping him. No it was for a much more intricate reason. For starters, he wasn't aiming to use it to sate his lust for the young man. He wanted answers and he wasn't certain that the wristband would work the way he needed it to.

Jack picked it up, the cold metal warming to his touch as he twirled it between his fingers. He allowed his concentration to wander as he flipped it over and over.

By the time he had come back from helping Gwen, Ianto had already left. Jack had tried to ignore the annoyance at finding him gone, but his frustration must have been easily spotted by Tosh and Owen. They'd both been giving him strange looks before they left for the evening. Of course they had absolutely no idea why he was so damn irritated, but they had definitely noticed something.

He had been sorely tempted to go to Ianto's loft and confront him there, but he didn't know if that would make things better or worse. He just couldn't understand what the hell had changed within a mere eight hours of Ianto going home and when he'd arrived the next morning. He was growing more and more irate at the fact that Ianto had managed to avoid him for the entire day. Consequently not allowing Jack to find out what the fuck was going on.

Jack tightened his grip around the metal band and then suddenly dropped it back onto the desk. He heard a sharp ringing sound when it hit, but he ignored it as he stood up. Walking to the door of his office, he stared at Tosh's workstation.

The images came on suddenly, allowing a more frustrated mood to roll over him. He could still see Ianto lying there on the floor, with himself wrapped around the younger man's body. Jack had actually been happy, albeit for only a little while, but happy nonetheless. He'd also been more comfortable and sedate than he wanted to think about. Something else that hadn't happened in quite a long time.

Sighing, he turned away from the memories and looked back at the wristband. He really needed to know why Ianto was acting so strange. Be it through fear or embarrassment, Ianto was definitely avoiding telling him something. And Jack _**hated**_ not knowing what the hell was going on, hated it more than he would ever care to admit.

'_There's also absolutely no way to know that it'll work that way. Especially since you do actually want a lot more from Ianto then answers.'_ His mind threw out capriciously.

He knew that was definitely another issue. Every time he used the wristband, it seemed like he lost a little more control and power over where his lust would take him. He had not intended on things getting so intense after that first dream of the two of them in the Hub. Even if it had been enjoyable, _'Very fucking enjoyable', _the whole situation had escalated to the point that he wasn't even sure he was in control of it anymore.

When he had first put the wristband on, it was meant to be a tease and nothing more. It had blossomed into a way tame his lust without having to wait. While Ianto had been seemingly growing more frustrated, he had been ignoring the very real probability that he might be going just a little too far. All of this, with a man that had never before had to deal with being attracted to another man and, let's not forget, was used to living by quaint Earth society rules.

With the way that Ianto had behaved after that last time, Jack had actually almost felt a little guilty. At least when they had both been dreaming he'd had an excuse, he couldn't remove the wristband.

However, that last time he had been fully awake and able to pull away at any time, and yet he'd stayed and just taken what was offered. Damn Ianto's emotions and the consequences involved.

All of which had led him to this point, contemplating something that a few days ago, he wouldn't have thought twice about doing. He didn't like the internal debate, and he certainly wasn't enjoying himself. To top it all off, on a much more aggravating level, he didn't like thinking that Ianto was upset about what had happened.

He _**really**_ needed to know if Ianto had been ready for what had already happened between them. He needed to make sure the young man was actually ready for them to escalate their relationship, which judging by his reaction this morning, Jack was starting to have serious doubts about it.

'_Why is it such a big God damn deal? Fuck it! Just do it already.'_

He growled as he stalked back over to his desk. Picking up the wristband, he shoved it on his arm and closed his eyes.

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Ianto lay in bed trying to find some vestiges of sleep. He was having a hard time as his mind kept returning to everything that was going to happen in the next few days. He shuddered when he thought about the fact that Doctor Tanizaki was arriving the next day.

'_Lisa will get better but is that what you really want anymore?'_ his mind questioned fervently.

Ianto sighed with frustration, covering his eyes with his palms. At times, he really hated his own bloody mentality. He took his hands away quickly when images of Jack overrode the darkness.

He kept picturing Jack's face, not from any of their dalliances or his dreams, but from that morning when he'd pulled away from him. That brief moment of unsurety and hurt had made Ianto want to both snog him senseless and crack him upside the head. Ianto knew that where most of the team was concerned he was nearly invisible, but why couldn't _**Jack**_ at least see that Ianto was in his own personal hell?

Never mind that Jack didn't know the reasons why. That Jack himself had pretty much created the situation with his fucking games and seduction.

'_That's complete bollocks! Jack only took what you offered the moment you met him and you know it.'_

Ianto groaned at the thought and slammed his fist into his pillow.

At this rate he was going to get less sleep then he had a few nights ago. He truly didn't want to have to deal with being that tired again. Not only did he have to be alert for Lisa, but it would also cause problems when it came to his control around Jack. And he really didn't know what the hell he would do if that situation got any more intense. He was already starting to feel Jack's presence even when he was nowhere near the man.

Like right at the moment, he could practically sense him in the room. He could smell those bloody pheromones as if Jack was lying right next to him. If he really focused, he could feel the bed shift minutely with every breath Jack took.

A hand stroked down his back and Ianto closed his eyes at the sensation. The moment he did he felt lightheaded and his mind got slightly muddled. He felt hot, as if the temperature in the room had suddenly shot up. All of his senses seemed to accelerate, taste, smell, touch. The sheet and duvet rubbed against his skin and they felt almost silky. The smell of Jack, coated his throat, making him moan as his cock hardened to an almost painful state within seconds.

His stomach lurched in an unsettlingly way and his eyes flew open. He felt as if the whole world had suddenly shifted off its axis, leaving him to stare around at his own room in wonder. He had either fallen asleep the moment he closed his eyes, or something entirely alien was going on. And working for bloody Torchwood meant it could fall under either category.

There was a light in the room, giving everything in it a cerulean hue. Ianto gasped and turned over. He was still lying in bed, but Jack was _**actually**_ next to him. He turned over at the feel of Jack's body pressing up against his. He saw shock on the other man's face and almost before he knew what he was doing, he launched his body towards Jack's.

He cried out, a groan coming from deep in his chest as he locked his lips to Jack's throat at his pulse point and bit down hard. The impact of his body on Jack's had placed him directly on top of the other man with his erection pressing heavily into Jack's hip. He shifted minutely, just enough until he felt Jack's cock hard against his own.

Ianto's hips tilted down, pressing Jack into the bed. His hands searched everywhere over the body below him, until he couldn't take anymore. He _**needed**_ Jack, needed his body in a way that overwhelmed everything he'd felt in any other dream or reality based moment. In a way, what he was feeling was pure lust, so intense that he wanted to crawl into the man and stay there. His lips and teeth moved over Jack's neck laving and nipping at the skin as the sound of harsh moans, his and Jack's, filled the room around them. He moaned aloud, his teeth releasing Jack's neck and his head arching back, as Jack thrust his own hips up hard into Ianto's.

"Oh fuck Jack. I need you. Please God...I just fucking _**want**_ you. I don't bloody care how fucking wrong it is. Please!"

Ianto had barely realized what he was going to say until the words practically escaped from his mouth.

He felt Jack try to pull away and tightened his grip on the other man's body.

"Ianto, let go of me." Jack said in a strained voice. "Please Ianto, I need to talk to you."

Ianto shook his head, his blue-grey eyes locking onto Jack's own sapphire depths. He smiled at the older man as he rocked his hips forward again.

"No, Sir. Not this time." He said to Jack's stunned expression.

The shocked expression hit Ianto's abdomen like a bolt of lightning, heating up his skin and drawing him further into the other man's body.

He felt Jack's hips buck up into his again, the friction of hard flesh rubbing almost painfully the moment he'd called him sir and he knew, just knew that Jack was in the same place as he was. Jack needed this just as much as he did. Maybe even more.

He leant in a little further down and locked his lips on Jack's earlobe, before releasing it and speaking into Jack's ear, making sure the air ghosted into it as he spoke.

"Either you're going to fuck me or I'm going to fuck you. Either way, one of us is going to feel a hard cock as it thrusts into our body. One of us is going to be screaming with pleasure while the other one fucks us through the mattress."

His tongue flicked out, running over the smooth inner curve of Jack's ear.

"So what's it going to be Sir?" Ianto said, drawing out on the last word, his voice turning the sir into nearly a purr.

"Are you going fuck me like you've wanted to from the moment you met me, or do I get to take my pleasure from your body instead?"

Jack was shuddering beneath him, his heart beating hard and erratically against Ianto's own chest. He was breathing so heavily that if Ianto wasn't certain he was dreaming, he would have been worried Jack would hyperventilate.

Ianto gasped as Jack's hands were suddenly on his arse, gripping him tightly, pulling their cocks painfully against one another's again.

"Fuck me Ianto. Right now damn it!"

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TBC

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_AN: __So, um, I know I will definitely receive death threats over this one…but you'll all live. I promise. The next section will be so totally worth it. :D Remember I got promises from some of you that that wouldn't happen! __And just to let everyone know, my wonderful BETA __**has**__ threatened me with harm if I don't get the next part to her pronto! So off to finish the next chapter…_


	13. Chapter 13 Temptation Abounds

_AN: Um…yeah. Extra long, slightly graphic chapter here. Everyone who pestered me and expected this to be Cyberwoman, eat your hearts out. I had a full night before to work with. You really think I'd jump over that? (Evil grin) Don't worry lots of angst, a few new questions asked, a few old questions answered coming up soon. For now, can I let the boys enjoy themselves? _

_Oh and this chapter goes to my wonderful BETA __**mama rocks**__, for putting up with me and helping me out so damn much. :D She really helped out with this chapter and I truly appreciate it!_

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Chapter 13 - Temptation Abounds

Jack growled as he gripped Ianto closer to him, his body tense. He couldn't let go of the young man if he wanted to.

'_Which I don't…not ever'_ he thought possessively.

If Jack had been honest with himself, he'd expected something like this to happen the moment he'd slammed the wristband on his arm. However, he never expected Ianto, prim, proper, and oh so fucking innocent when it came to sex with another man, to be able to turn Jack himself into one massive epicenter that emitted lust, pleasure, and need.

At first he had been shocked. He'd known Ianto wasn't asleep so he'd figured the only thing to do was to wait. Then suddenly Ianto had been in front of him, his body radiating a heat that soaked clear though Jack's clothes and burned at his skin. The room became hazy around the edges, a cerulean light giving everything a warm comforting glow.

He'd had every intention of trying to talk to Ianto, but then the young man had all but thrown his body onto Jack's and locked his teeth on his neck. Suddenly, the only thing Jack could think of was how very good it all felt and how much he really just wanted to sate this God damn lust that seemed to be taking over his life lately.

Still, he had _**tried**_ to maintain his thoughts and not forget why he was doing this in the first place. Just as he was about to pull away, Ianto had shifted and pressed his cock down onto Jack's, his hands grasping at Jack's body everywhere through his clothes. Every reasonable argument and restraining word that was on Jack's lips escaped instead in a harsh moan, his own hips bucking up to collide their cocks against one another again.

He wanted to think that he'd be able to maintain some semblance of control, especially after Ianto had made that comment about how wrong this was. Those words had been enough to pull him back to reality, feeling as if he'd had ice doused through his veins. But Ianto hadn't allowed him to pull back. Instead he'd called him sir. Of all the screwed up things in his life, the way that Ianto called him that whilst rocking their hips together had nearly made him come.

Just from that one little fucking word as it left Ianto's mouth.

Ianto had given him a choice, that lush Welsh accent stating that one of them was going to fuck the other, no matter what. _**That**_ was the moment he'd lost any remaining amount of restraint, however minute. He had nothing left in him, no will to stop. He wasn't even sure he even could try. He knew he didn't really want to.

Ianto surrounded him, enveloping his every thought, as Jack grasped at the young man's shorts, and yanked them off his legs. Ianto was completely bare to his eyes, his nude body glowing in the bluish hue, his cock pulsing as it lay heavily against his stomach. Suddenly, Jack felt as if he couldn't breathe.

He felt a moment of panic when Ianto reached over to open his shirt. The last time Ianto had tried and they were in a dream state, he'd been unable to even undo the buttons. Jack was just about to tell Ianto to wait a moment when the young man grasped the edges of his shirt and pulled it apart. He heard the buttons snap, a few falling to the floor and one even hitting the wall.

Ianto had a look of concentration on his face as he snapped Jack's braces off his shoulders and pulled the shirt down off Jack's arms, throwing it to the end of the bed.

Jack realised at that moment that something was different from the other times he had done this, but he wasn't about to start analysing it. Instead he grasped his undershirt and pulled it over his own head, tossing it down in the same direction as his dress shirt. His hands went to the catch of his trousers, only to be knocked away by Ianto's.

"Mine." Ianto's voice said harshly as he yanked at the catch and unzipped the trousers.

Jack groaned at the possessiveness of his tone. He'd never known Ianto could be like this, so fucking demanding and so _**very**_ intent on his purpose. With all the lovers he'd had, not one of them had _**ever**_ made him feel the pleasure this intensely.

Ianto grasped the trousers and tugged them down his hips roughly, his nails scraping against the skin on Jack's hips as he lifted them to allow easier removal. Jack thrust forward at the feeling, his body aching and vibrating with lust. He cried out when Ianto leant forward and locked his lips around the apex of his leg and sucked hard, his teeth digging into the skin. Jack felt his cock hit Ianto's cheek and his hips thrust forward of their own accord.

"Ianto, holy fucking hell!" he panted out, his voice breaking with more need than he realised.

Ianto pulled away from him, licking at the love bite he'd left behind, before running his eyes up Jack's body slowly. By the time they locked on Jack's own gaze, Jack felt faint, the air moving harshly in and out of his chest in ragged breaths.

Jack fell forward, his lips locking onto Ianto's. He thrust his tongue into the younger man's mouth, only for it to meet Ianto's as they both tried to dominate the kiss. Ianto growled as he pulled away and hauled Jack's trousers the rest of the way off before tossing them to the end of the bed. His hands ran up Jack's body until they met his shoulders, pushing him back against the bed, quickly covering Jack's body with his own.

Both men moaned, their lips crushed together as their bodies slid against each other's. Sweat broke out between their tightly pressed torsos and abdomens, allowing for better movement. Ianto's heavily weeping cock thrust into Jack's and he gasped at the feeling, his mouth falling away from Ianto's, as their hard erections slid slickly against each other's.

Jack ran his hands down Ianto's sides, his fingers encountering smooth skin and firm muscles. He closed his eyes as Ianto dropped his head and took one of his hard nipples into his mouth, biting and suckling at it almost painfully. Ianto pulled away, his lips and tongue traveling over Jack's chest. Jack felt his hips thrust forward as Ianto's tongue briefly flicked out to lave against his belly button.

Ianto slid back up his body slowly. Stopping only when their bodies were flush against each other again. Jack opened his eyes to see a very amusing, yet heart stopping look upon Ianto's face.

Ianto looked at him expectantly as if awaiting instructions.

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Ianto stared at Jack, his eyes shifting down to Jack's mouth. Biting his lower lip, he leant down and placed another brief kiss against Jack's lips before pulling back. He thrust his hips down slower than he had before, the movement causing both men to draw in a sharp gasp of air.

As much as he wanted Jack, he really had no idea what to do from this point. He was so fucking confused. He obviously knew the basics of it, but he had nowhere near enough information on how to continue. To make matters worse, he had no idea if he would be able to continue considering all of this was coming from his own fucking mind.

Jack smiled up at him, his lips curling almost wickedly.

Ianto didn't fight as Jack rolled them over. He did however groan when Jack pulled away from him. Next to the fire heat of Jack, the room was way too chilly. His skin broke out, pebbling as the chilly air caressed over it. He reached for the other man trying to pull him back to him.

He may have no idea what to do next, but he needed to keep Jack's body against his own.

"It's okay Ianto. I'm not going anywhere." He heard Jack's voice reassure him with a whisper.

He watched Jack lean down towards the end of the bed to grasp his trousers. Jack rummaged through them checking each pocket before pulling out a small tube and Ianto realised belatedly exactly what it was.

'_Lube, of course. Mental note. Jack, who is rarely prepared for anything, is always prepared for sex, even in my fucking dreams'_ he ruminated with amusement. A tiny smirk unexpectedly flitted across his face at the thought.

Jack's body was suddenly flush against his own. Ianto couldn't help the harsh groan that ripped from his throat at the sudden heat, soft skin, and hard muscles pressing into him. His arms curved around Jack's body, his hands gripping Jack's back as he pulled him closer.

"Something funny, Ianto?" Jack said with a slight tinge of laughter in his own voice.

Ianto grasped Jack, making sure his nails dug into the skin of the other man's shoulders as he rolled them back over, so that he was once again on top. Jack bucked up against him, his eyes nearly rolling back into his head.

"Not at all…Sir." he growled out, his voice rolling the last word again.

He ran his hands down Jack's arms, making sure to press his short nails into the hard muscle underneath the skin. His fingers skipped over a metal band and the vortex manipulator. His grasped Jack's hands in his own and tugged his arms above his head.

Just as he was about to lean forward and capture Jack's lips in a kiss, he froze, his eyes shifting towards where he was holding Jack. Ianto tried to ignore the feel and sound of the man below him as he attempted to focus on Jack's wrists. He couldn't figure out what was wrong. He'd seen that metal bracelet somewhere before but had no idea where or when.

Jack was gasping for air below him, his heart thundering in his chest. He felt Jack thrust his body upwards and Ianto heard him growl in annoyance when he got no response. Jack shifted below him, his head moving forward. His lips, teeth, and tongue travelled over every bit of Ianto's chest that they could reach before biting down hard on his shoulder.

Ianto gasped his eyes going down to clash with Jack's smoldering ones. Jack thrust upwards, his hips pushing hard into Ianto's.

"Are you going to fuck me or not Ianto?" Jack asked him throatily, trying to free his hands from Ianto's grip.

Ianto held onto Jack's hands for a moment longer, before pulling away the lube in his own hand. He really didn't care about the God damned metal band. He'd worry about it later, when he wasn't having the most incredible fucking dream of his life.

"You are a cruel man Ianto Jones." Jack said through panting breaths of air.

Ianto felt a moment of guilt, before he hastily looked away from Jack's gaze and turned his attention to the tube in his hand. He really hoped Jack had not seen it, but he knew that the odds were not in his favour. He felt Jack's fingers on his chin as he tilted his face up to look him in the eyes.

'_Thank God this is a bloody dream.'_ he thought with a tinge of regret.

Jack smiled at him and began to push him away. Ianto started to protest, until he realised Jack was just trying to turn over. He pulled back, sitting on his heels, as he allowed the older man to do so. Jack grabbed one of the pillows and pushed it under his own hips.

"It's okay Ianto, it'll be easier this way the first time. Believe me, this is simple. Tab a," Jack said as he reached around and grasped Ianto's cock in his hand. Ianto gasped thrusting into the tight fist, "goes into hole b."

Ianto heard Jack groan as his hand ran around his own arse, dipping into the crevice.

"But first you need to prepare me." Jack stated, his voice lower and hoarser then before.

Ianto shuddered at the sound, his body suddenly breaking out again in sweat. Jack released Ianto's erection and pulled his other hand away from his arse at the same time. He twisted around as he took the lube from Ianto. He snapped open the tube, poured some on his own hand. He grasped Ianto's hand, dribbling the liquid onto Ianto's fingers, then snapped it shut and dropped it next to Ianto.

Jack reached down, his hand grasping Ianto's cock again and Ianto cried out as he began to thrust heavily into the slick palm.

"Start with one, and go from there." Jack said softly, just barely loud enough for Ianto to hear.

Ianto felt himself shudder. He didn't know how the hell he was supposed to do as Jack asked, especially with the feel of Jack's slick hand around his cock, moving steadily with each thrust of his hips. Taking a deep breath and trying to concentrate on his task, he ran his non-lubed hand over Jack's arse, caressing it. He reached forward and ran his lubed fingers down the crevice, until they reached the tight hole nestled in between.

Ianto ran a digit around the crinkled opening, and gasped as he felt it tremor, flexing against the tip of his finger. He pressed in slowly, his palm down, feeling it give way with every slight push forward.

Without any warning, Jack released his erection. Ianto saw his arms reach out, gripping at one of the pillows tightly over his head. He heard Jack whimper, the sound turning into a soft keen as he arched his head back. He tilted his torso down as he pushed back into Ianto's hand, encasing the digit swiftly down to Ianto's knuckle. Jack began moving his hips, thrusting back into Ianto's hand and Ianto couldn't stop the low deep moan that came from his chest. Just the sight of Jack so decadent and wanton, was nearly enough to drive him over the edge. His finger curled downwards into Jack's body as his hand attempted to clutch at anything in its grasp. Jack moaned harshly, his hips bucking the moment Ianto's finger rubbed against something inside him.

_'Oh, that's what he did to me.'_ Ianto thought with a hint of amazement. His gaze locked on the older man as he thrust harder back into Ianto's hand.

"Fuck Ianto, add another one, please!" Jack cried out suddenly, breaking Ianto's daze.

Ianto moved his body, kneeling behind Jack, then slipped another finger next to the one that was already going in and out of the tight hole. He curled his fingers inside Jack again and he heard Jack sob out another moan.

Belatedly, Ianto realised that Jack was essentially doing all the moving. The next time that Jack pulled his body forward, Ianto pulled his hand back, then drove forward at the same time that Jack propelled back into him. Jack's whole body shuddered, a harsh moan falling from his lips as his body squeezed tightly around Ianto's fingers. Ianto began to move faster as Jack pushed back into each thrust. He curled his fingers, brushing against that same pleasure spot every time he entered Jack's body, drawing a whimper or a groan from the older man's throat.

He thrust a few more times and then slipped a third slick finger next to the other two, adding it the next time he drove forward. Jack screamed, his whole body tightening, a cry coming from deep in his chest. Without warning, Jack reached down and grasped the base of his own erection as he thrust backwards into Ianto's hand.

"Jesus Christ, Ianto! Just fuck me! I'm ready!" Jack cried out gutturally, his voice nearly a growl.

Ianto snarled, his hand searching for the tube that Jack had dropped next to him. He knew that whatever lube that had been on his cock was probably partially dried already and he really didn't want to have to take his hands off of or out of Jack for any longer then he had to. He kept thrusting his fingers as he searched.

He pulled them out when he found it. Flicking it open, he poured a generous amount on his hand and slicked up his cock. He kneeled behind Jack, pressing the head at the taut ring.

He should have expected it, but Ianto was still surprised when Jack pressed back into him, engulfing his erection in one smooth shift backwards. He felt the tightness encase him, gripping at his cock as he slid effortlessly all the way into Jack's body, until his hips were flush against the other man's arse. He froze for a second, allowing his body to adjust to the sensations, before thrusting in a little more, trying to get as deep as possible.

Bloody hell, he had never felt anything like this before. Heat surrounded him, Jack's body a tight glove, squeezing him. He couldn't move, could barely breath with all the feelings invading his body and mind. His hands gripped at Jack's hips tightly, hard enough to bruise. His eyes travelled over Jack's back and he reached his hand out to run his fingers through the sweat that had broken out. He could feel every flex of muscle under Jack's skin wherever his fingers touched. Ianto leant forward and ran his tongue down Jack's back, the flavour of his skin and sweat exploding against his taste buds.

He opened his eyes, not even realising he had closed them. The sensations were _**too**_ real, _**too**_ bloody intricate to just be a dream. Just as he was about to cry out at the revelation he'd discovered, Jack pulled forward and thrust back into him.

"Bloody hell Jack!" Ianto cried out harshly, all the thoughts leaving his mind in a quick rush as the pleasure travelled from his cock and burst throughout his entire body.

He had thought the feelings couldn't get any more powerful. Jack pulled forward again, obviously intending to repeat the movement. Ianto moved his hands to Jack's shoulders and pulled him back, driving his hips forward at the same time.

"God yes, Ianto. Fuck me!" Jack screamed, his back arching into the thrust.

He ran his hands down Jack's back, his eyes following their path, as he pulled out, slower this time. When his hands reached Jack's rounded arse he pressed the cheeks together as he slammed back in. He hurriedly shifted his legs on either side of Jack's, pressing them tightly together, as he pulled back and thrust forward again into gripping heat.

Jack snarled, the sound of it carrying directly to Ianto's lust filled mind, causing him to thrust erratically a few times before he regained control. Ianto's hands slipped from Jack arse as Jack reared backwards until he was kneeling between Ianto's legs, his back flush against Ianto's chest. Ianto wrapped his arms around Jack's body, his hips beginning to drive at a faster pace as he held onto the other man tightly. Ianto heard Jack moaning at every thrust of his body. His hands moved over Jack's toned chest, his fingers seeking and finding the erect nipples. He pinched them between his fingers, hard.

Ianto heard Jack gasp through the moans that were coming steadily from his throat. He twisted his torso around as his arm came up to grasp at Ianto's neck, his nails digging into Ianto's skin as he pulled his mouth into a hard open wet kiss. Ianto shifted his body forward slightly, thrusting faster and harder. Jack groaned into his mouth, his tongue suddenly fucking into Ianto's mouth in the same pace that Ianto's hips had set. He sucked at Jack's tongue as it moved, his breath coming in rough pants against the other man's lips.

Jack moved his other hand from Ianto's hip, grasping his own cock in his fist as he began to pump it fast and hard. Ianto growled, dropping his own hand and knocking Jack's out of the way. He pulled his lips back from Jack's mouth as he gripped Jack's erection in his fist and took up where he'd stopped the other man.

"Mine, Sir." he said in a rough low voice.

He saw Jack's face crumple a moment before he felt his entire body coil in his arms. Jack's arse gripped Ianto's cock tighter and tighter as he both tried to thrust forward and back at the same time as he came, Ianto's name echoing over and over from his lips. Jack's come erupted from his cock, hitting the bed and coating Ianto's hand as it moved.

He was still shuddering as Ianto plunged into Jack's body twice more before he cried out his own release. He pulled Jack back and thrust upwards, trying to get as deep as possible into the other man, as his cock erupted, spurting his seed inside Jack's body.

They collapsed onto the bed, Ianto's softening erection still buried inside of Jack.

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Jack lay under Ianto, panting roughly his body completely sated. He tried to focus, knowing he should be doing something at this moment, but not realising what it was as his brain shorted out before providing him with an answer.

Ianto shifted above him, moving away and falling heavily next to Jack. Jack moaned as the softening cock slipped out of him, his body suddenly feeling very empty. He turned to his side and curled around Ianto, pressing his lips into Ianto's sweaty neck and licking at the moisture. He felt Ianto hesitate before wrapping his arms around Jack and pulling him closer to him.

He shifted his arms, pressing them above Ianto's head as he pulled his head up to look Ianto in the face. His eyes opened wide when he saw the confused expression covering the young man's features.

"Jack, what the bloody hell is going on?"

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TBC

_AN: So what do you think? Reviews appreciated and responded to! But not a necessary action to take…lol._


	14. Chapter 14 Escape

_AN: This chapter goes to SilverCat63 for keeping me highly amused and entertained throughout the past week. I hope you like it!_

_Thanks goes to mama rocks for another excellent BETA job. This one had a few issues and she really helped fix them! :D_

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Chapter 14 - Escape

Jack stared down at Ianto, his face giving nothing away. He was smirking, something that irritated Ianto no end. If only he could be sure that this whole thing wasn't really a dream.

After all, it could be one. The only thing Ianto had to go on was a gut feeling, and lately his emotions had been so discordant that his intuition had been completely off on everything to do with alien tech. On a much more basic level he had been unable to predict what Jack would do or how far he'd go to seduce him.

Ianto watched Jack carefully, trying to find some indication that the other man was hiding his knowledge of the situation. He was fairly certain that Jack knew what was going on. At first there was nothing. Jack just kept running his hands over Ianto's body as if he had all the time in the world. However, after a few minutes of watching the other man, Ianto noticed several things that seemed to be signs that Jack was frustrated.

For one thing, he kept blinking and not in a normal bodily function way. He would close his eyes and hold them that way for several seconds. Then the lids would flutter open, before his irises would quickly move surreptitiously around, as if taking in his surroundings.

The other thing was the way his gaze kept shifting towards his own arm.

Ianto arched his eyebrow as he nonchalantly stretched. He hoped Jack wouldn't notice the way his hand shook, or the determination in his own eyes as he tried to capture the other man's wrist. It obviously didn't work because Jack suddenly leant forward and blew softly into his ear. His eyes slammed shut at the feeling, his heart pounding in his chest as his hips thrust up into the air.

His reaction to the sensation was always the same, no matter who did it. It had been embarrassing enough when he was younger and snogging a girl in the back of a car. Most of the time he had barely been able to hold onto his sanity, and on a few memorable occasions, his control.

However, when Jack did it to him, it was so much more powerful, so much deeper, that his brain all but shorted out completely. He could come from that alone.

He forgot about Jack's arm and trying to figure out what the older man was hiding. He forgot about how all of this might not be a dream. As Jack moved away from his ear and thrust his tongue into Ianto's mouth, he had a hard time even remembering his own fucking name.

Jack kissed him hard, his lips suctioning at Ianto's. Their teeth clashed against one another and Ianto groaned as he felt Jack's tongue flick over the back of his mouth. When Jack bit down gently on the tip of Ianto's own tongue and began to suckle at it, Ianto bucked his hips so hard that Jack grasped them to steady his own body.

Jack withdrew from the deep kiss and nibbled at Ianto's lips, before moving down to suck and bite at the soft skin of Ianto's jaw, neck, and clavicle.

Ianto groaned, the cry harsh and ragged. It felt almost as if Jack was trying to consume him. His cock was rock hard despite the fact that he'd come less than ten minutes before. His body throbbing as it arched into Jack's. He couldn't remember anything that felt as good as this moment.

_'Except for being inside of Jack! The tightness and heat that had enveloped me! Bloody hell! I'm going to…'_ he lost the thought when Jack's weight moved on top of him.

He felt his own body shudder underneath Jack's, the feeling of their skin connecting causing every nerve to sizzle with satisfaction. He tensed, bright lights flashing behind his eyelids as he clutched at Jack's arms. His fingers curled, the nails digging into Jack's soft flesh, hard enough to break the skin. Jack moved up to Ianto's ear again and blew another wave of air into it.

"Oh Christ. Yes Jack!" Ianto cried out, pleasure travelling through him. His erection pulsed against Jack's, his fluids coating both their abdomens as he came hard, bucking against the other man's body.

Jack cradled him for a few moments, his hands soothingly running through Ianto's hair as he came down from his orgasm. Ianto heard him whispering into his ear, but he couldn't catch the words. His mind was too overwhelmed to turn the sounds into anything comprehensible.

Suddenly he slid off Ianto's body, lying next to him again. Ianto felt him lean forward as he brushed his lips in a soft almost chaste kiss, before pulling away completely.

Ianto growled as he felt Jack withdraw from him. He reached out to try to pull Jack's body back to his as his eyes finally flew open.

The room was empty with no sign of Jack. His clothes were gone from the end of the bed. There was absolutely no evidence that Jack had ever been there.

Ianto lay back in bed, trying to ignore the tears that were unexpectedly escaping his soft eyes.

_'Why couldn't it have been real? Why do I have to choose between them? I want Lisa and I want Jack damn it! Why the bloody hell does this shite have to be so fucking confusing!'_

Ianto turned his head into his pillow and let his tears come unencumbered. He let the misery take him.

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Jack's eyes flew open.

_'Finally!' _he thought. His eyes unexpectedly slammed shut again as a wave of dizziness overtook him, causing him to grasp the edge of his desk. He took a moment to gain his equilibrium before trying to open them again.

He was still standing in the same spot he'd been when he'd slammed the wristband on his arm. However, a few things were notably different. For starters, he was standing there completely nude, his clothes a rumpled pile on the floor a few feet away. His legs felt like they were made of rubber, wobbling under him. The back of his thighs were suspiciously damp, as if Ianto's fluids were leaking out of his body. He also felt wonderfully sore, exactly the way he always felt after a really good bout of sex. Actually, he felt a lot like he'd spent the entire night getting completely and thoroughly fucked.

Furthermore, he was no longer wearing the wristband. Instead it was clutched in the fingers of his opposite hand. Jack stumbled around to his chair and sank down heavily onto it. He'd worry about cleaning it up later.

_'What the hell happened?'_ he thought as he glared down at the wristband. Jack dropped it suddenly, as if the metal band had become fire hot. He reached down to grab the wristband and hurriedly shoved it into one of his desk drawers, all the way at the back, beneath as much stuff as possible.

_'Jesus Christ, I think we actually had sex! It's not supposed to do that...is it? Did that really happen?' _

Jack glanced at the clock on his computer. It was nearly five in the morning. Essentially what had felt like maybe an hour and half of pleasure had turned into a full six hours. He was completely sated, but he was also thoroughly exhausted. The entire team would be arriving in couple of hours…including Ianto. Panic gripped him again as he thought about how he was going to handle the whole situation.

_'How the hell am I going to face Ianto when he confronts me about this? Even if he manages to think it was dream, some things are not going to add up.'_

Jack groaned in frustration and got to his feet, testing his balance before he let go of the desk. As he stood up he noticed a couple more things that made him shudder with the implications of what they could mean. He reached down to pick up his clothes and pulled his shirt out to look at it. The first thing he observed was that the shirt seemed to be missing every single button. He walked around the desk and spotted the missing buttons on the floor where he had been standing.

He gathered them up hastily, realising that if Ianto saw them when he came in, there would be no way to stop his questions. He dropped the buttons on his desk, finally acknowledging the second thing he'd been avoiding pointing out to himself. His body reeked of sex and Ianto. The latter he could handle, the former, well that would cause even more questions.

He sighed, heading towards his shower.

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Ianto lay frozen in his bed. He'd finally stopped crying after reminding himself that it wasn't helping the situation. In fact, it was completely counterproductive. It wasn't like this whole mess could be sorted out with a bucket of tears.

As much as he would've loved to claim plausible deniability, what had just happened with Jack was still too real to have been a dream. Jack's diversionary tactics when it came to Ianto's questions still needed a lot of work.

_'But if it wasn't a dream, how the hell did Jack do it? It's not as if you opened your eyes and he was still lying next to you.' _Ianto groaned aloud as his mind argued the logistics with him.

_'See, just a dream.' _it reiterated helpfully.

His alarm went off beside him and he jumped at the sound. Quickly reaching over he turned it off and pushed it towards the edge of the bedside table. He sniffed the air and wrinkled his nose as the smell of sex and semen hit his nostrils.

'_I need a shower. Can't go around smelling like Jack and sex all day._'

The thought made him pause as he began to roll towards the edge of his bed. The smell of Jack and his damn pheromones coated everything around him. The duvet and sheet were practically soaked with the scent. Ianto leaned over and pressed his face into the pillow, drawing in a deep breath. He felt his cock start to harden again and ignored it as he realised what this could all imply.

'_Bloody hell! What are you a 15 year old little girl? Nothing happened. It was all a God damned dream! All of this is just some elaborate trick of your mind. Stop fucking trying to convince yourself that something really happened!'_

Throwing his legs over the side of the bed, he tried not to notice the soreness in his body, or the way his thighs ached, as if from overuse. He also tried to ignore the fact that he was nude, his briefs sitting on the edge of the bed exactly where Jack had thrown them in his dream. Just as he stood up his bare foot pressed down on something hard and round, digging almost painfully into his heel. He knelt down to see what it was.

"Oh my God." he said to the empty room, his voice low and harsh. He fell back to the bed as his legs gave out on him, the air in his chest suddenly constricting. His left hand grasped the duvet tightly, clutching at it as his mind tried to make sense of what he was holding in his right hand.

In his fingers he held a small blue button, just like the ones that had been on Jack's shirt.

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Jack sat at his computer, his hair still dripping from the shower he'd taken. He'd spent the remainder of his time before the team arrived cleaning up all evidence of what had happened the night before. His chair was spotless, as was the rest of his office. If Ianto was going to come in and clean it today, he would find no reason whatsoever to think that Jack was hiding something from him.

He did have a problem though. There was something that could entirely ruin the whole cover-up, and he wasn't sure if he could fix it. On his desk in front of him, were all of the buttons from his shirt.

'_Well almost all of them.'_ he thought with a hint of aggravation.

He was missing one. He'd searched his office several times. He'd counted the damn buttons each time he'd finished searching and even a few times just whilst sitting there staring at them. Every single fucking time he came up one short. It wasn't like there were that many to start with in the first place.

At this point he was trying to figure out exactly what it implied. He'd be completely safe, as long as Ianto never found the button.

"And really, just one little button? What are the fucking possibilities of that?" he said to himself in a low strict voice. He knew he was just trying to convince himself, but currently it was his best hope.

The problem was, he remembered exactly what Ianto's room looked like. There hadn't been much in that room beside the basics. This was odd for someone Ianto's age, but not entirely helpful when it came to hiding something small. The fact that Ianto was also meticulous and an extraordinarily neat person made Jack's chances go way down that the button wouldn't be discovered.

He heard the cog door alarm start to screech and hurriedly gathered the buttons, throwing them into the top drawer of his desk. He'd have to take his chances.

_'For right now I'll concentrate on Torchwood. Maybe the damn rift will act up and actually be helpful for once.' _He snorted in disbelief as he looked to see who was arriving, finding Tosh settling at her station.

_'Yeah right, and maybe the Doctor will show up and take you away while he's at it.'_

Jack sighed and stood up. At least Ianto wouldn't try to confront him in front of the others. He'd just have to make sure he didn't end up alone in a room with him any time today.

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TBC

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_AN: Reviews not necessary but highly a__ppreciated! :D_


	15. Chapter 15 Fight or Flight

_AN: There is no smut in this chapter, just a LOT of angst. It's also a shorter chapter and somewhat depressing. At least it was to write out…lol. _

_As a warning, I'm not rewriting Cyberwoman. The next chapter will take place **after **that episode, with memories showing up of things that have happened during the episode. There's just not enough extras to make a whole chapter. And believe it or not, there should be smut. :D_

_Thanks to mama rocks for the great BETA on this chapter. It honestly sounded a lot worse before she got a hold of it! :D_

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Chapter 15 - Fight or Flight

Jack sat at his desk, watching Ianto on the CCTV. Something he didn't fail to realise he'd been doing a lot of lately. He was having a hard time stopping himself, even though he knew it wasn't all that productive.

As he watched the young man he noticed a few things that seemed peculiar, even for Ianto. Like the fact that he couldn't seem to sit still for more than a few minutes at a time. One minute he'd be sitting there on his stool, reading or shuffling through papers, and then he'd suddenly stand up and start pacing. During the time he spent walking back and forth behind the counter, he would alternate between staring at his phone and putting his hand in his trouser pocket.

If it was anyone else, Jack probably wouldn't even notice. However, for Ianto, someone who rarely showed his frustration, this was practically on edge.

The other things that Jack saw were less evident. These were smaller actions that Jack wasn't quite sure he was seeing clearly given the size of the video. Every time Ianto put his hand in his pocket he would appear to close his eyes for a moment, almost as if he was remembering something. Every time he looked at his phone he got a nervous look on his face. However, it was all incredibly subtle. If Jack wasn't watching him so closely, he might not have even noticed it.

Jack leant in closer to the monitor, trying to decipher Ianto's expression, then pulled back suddenly.

_'What the hell am I doing?'_ He thought with unexpected clarity. _'It's not like we're in a God damned relationship! This is about lust and seduction, remember? Not about analysing every fucking move he makes!' _He chuckled low and under his breath at the thought.

He knew he was only trying to convince himself of these facts. The argument was beginning to grow old, even in his own fucking mind.

There was something different about Ianto, he just had no idea what it was. But he did know that almost everything he'd done to the young man had felt different to a normal seduction. It may have started out ordinary, but there was no way he could accept it as that now. He didn't know if that damn wristband had caused it or what, but he was actually starting to care about Ianto and in a lot of ways that terrified him.

He avoided emotional attachments, avoided falling for anyone, for the most obvious reasons he could think of. The first one always being that he would have to watch that person grow old and die. He would have to see their eyes grow more and more cold towards him over the years as they withered and wrinkled with age, and he stayed the same, never changing. Eventually that coldness would fade and turn into resentment. The person he cared about would turn away from him and grow to hate him. He'd seen it happen a couple of times in his long life and every time it seemed to hurt more, to cut just a little extra of his heart away.

Ianto working for Torchwood would probably save him from having to watch the young man turn against him in that way. But Jack would have to face the very real possibility of losing him way too young. It may it may be a completely different ending, but it was an ending just the same. It would still hurt him just as much as watching Ianto grow to resent him.

Either way, he would end up alone and broken, and that was a chance he wasn't willing to take. It wasn't a chance he _**could**_ take. If he was going to remain alive forever, then he had to stay away from the temptation of falling in love. Even if his mind was screaming at him to think through the decision, to come up with a different answer, he didn't want to take that chance with Ianto. He had already gotten deeper than he had ever intended.

Jack reached over, his resolution determined, and flicked off the monitor.

He needed to focus on Torchwood and waiting for the Doctor to come back. It was time to stop messing around with Ianto and just stick with what he _**should**_ be doing, not what he was tempted to do. He was actually going to resist, and that was certainly an unusual route for him to take.

Standing up he walked out of his office and went to see if the rest of the team wanted to play a little basketball.

_'At least that's a more productive way of killing my endless time.__ Knowing Owen, that'll only hurt my wallet. '_

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Ianto groaned, low and aggravated as he stood up and began pacing again. He wasn't certain Doctor Tanizaki would be able to keep their appointment. He had instructed the doctor to send a text of his arrival rather than call. He couldn't risk a call being overheard.

Unfortunately, the fact that Doctor Tanizaki was unreachable wasn't the only thing bothering him. Hidden in his trouser pocket he had the button that he'd found on his floor that morning. He had spent most of the day either screaming at himself for remembering the night with great detail or chastising himself for still thinking it had really happened. He was seriously starting to wonder what the whole thing meant. And he was close, so _**very**_ close, to going to Jack, falling to his knees, and confessing everything.

'_Absolution? __**Really**__?'_ Ianto shook his head lightly.

Maybe it wasn't really that bad, but he actually was having a problem with how indecisive he was becoming. His thoughts were waging a war over what to do about Lisa and he wasn't actually sure which side was winning. Something kept telling him that he should've told Jack about this whole damn situation from the very beginning. The other side kept telling him that he was a being a fool and that Torchwood existed to destroy alien threats.

'_But this isn't exactly Torchwood London is it? Jack's regime is different, his rules are a lot less destructive.'_

Ianto sighed as he sat back down again. Ironically enough, it was this argument with himself that had caused him to realise that he did still love Lisa. He knew that inner battles were rarely fought if the person didn't care about the outcome or the people involved. He may not want to take off and leave Jack broken, but he certainly didn't want Lisa to suffer any longer than she already had.

Lisa had been his life before the battle at Canary Warf. She'd kept his mind at peace and his heart safe from ever being hurt. He would save her and they would leave. After tonight, she would be his main priority in life again. He would take care of her and everything would get better. Eventually he would forget about the damage he was about to inflict on Jack and Torchwood. After enough time he might even be able to forget about Jack completely.

'_That's highly bloody unlikely__ and you know it. What it really comes down to is that she actually needs you more than he ever will, isn't that it?'_

Ianto looked up at the wall in confusion. He had no idea where the thought had come from. It wasn't like he cared about Jack. Jack was about lust and sex, not about love.

He reached his hand into his pocket and ran the button through his fingers. If only he knew what to make of the whole damn thing. After everything he'd been through in his life, the fact that Jack was able to make him lose control so quickly, even in his dreams , had to mean something. He'd never dreamt about one person, so often and so realistically, as he had about Jack from the moment he met him. Not even Lisa and that scared the hell out of him.

Ianto felt his phone vibrate, shaking him from his ruminations. He glanced at it to see a message from Doctor Tanizaki stating that he would be arriving soon. He jumped up from his stool again and glared at the clock.

'_How the hell has it gotten so late so soon? I'm not ready. I can't do this!' _He wanted to cry, wanted to scream at the top of his lungs...but he couldn't.

Instead he stood up and walked towards the Hub.

As he stood in the lift, he tried to regain his composure. Straightening his tie he turned towards the door at the last possible moment, just as it opened. He heard the rest of the team laughing and nearly lost all that careful control on his emotions again. When the cog door rolled open he couldn't take his eyes off of Jack. He barely noticed anyone else as they tossed around a basketball.

He stared at him, knowing that this really was the end. There would be no more wondering if Jack was going to win at his seduction, no more late night dalliances in front of Tosh's workstation. Jack was never going to mysteriously show up in his 'dreams' and beg him to fuck him.

As they walked past him out the door, he caught the basketball that Jack threw at him with only a slight waver in his hands. He didn't know what he expected, but a part of him had hoped that Jack would notice something. That maybe Jack would turn to him and tell him that the dream was real, or that Ianto should come with them.

Just as the lift door began to close, he turned towards it quickly, hoping to catch one last sight of Jack, to maybe see the truth in the other man's eyes. The door was already half closed and all he got was a brief sight of Jack's legs before it slammed shut.

Ianto turned and fled towards the conference room, his inner demons on his heels the entire time.

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TBC

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_AN: You guys got this chapter cause 16 is already done (and **extensively **__long) and chapter 17 is about halfway there! Reviews appreciated, but I won't hold the next part hostage if you decide to bypass it. I know that not everyone likes to review! :)  
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	16. Chapter 16 Love and Loss Make Dreadful

_AN: Okay, so kinda a long chapter, I had tons more for this chapter but it sort of exploded out of control. So the next chapter will be the rest of this scene. :D_

_Thanks goes to mama rocks for her very helpful suggestions to this chapter. It really wasn't up to normal par without her help and beta job!!!_

_This chapter is for prospect ...as well as:_

_ an__tic__i__pa__tion __–noun _

_1. the act of anticipating or the state of being anticipated._

_2. realization in advance; foretaste._

_3. expectation or hope._

_4. previous notion; slight previous impression._

_5. intuition, foreknowledge, or prescience._

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Chapter 16 - Love and Loss Make Dreadful Companions

_'I loved her. It's as straightforward as that._

_I may not have realised the implications of what would come to pass, but I did it all to save her. I did it all to save someone I loved._

_It's amazing how much clarity finally came through after everything has ended. Life changed so unexpectedly. I cannot explain another reason behind the things I did and where they've led me. So bloody often, there was a thread of doubt and indecision, both of which I chose to ignore. _

_But the human mind is resilient. The body wears and tears and my soul has shattered into a million million pieces with every heartbreak that I suffered. There will come a time, soon I'm certain, when I will no longer remember. My memories will be withdrawn into an abyss, never to be thought of again. The flames of the past will still singe. The ashes will linger for what was lost._

_And yet…_

_I still wish for other things that cannot be and things that were never given a chance to mature. They were people in my life that had no bearing on what I had done, and I almost took them with me when I fell. I tried to use them as pillows to soften the blow. They didn't deserve what I did to them. _

_They didn't warrant the hell I put them through and for that I am so very sorry.'_

Ianto stared at the diary entry, his mind and body shivering from the pain that gripped him. Tears ran down his cheeks, but he no longer bothered to brush them away. He'd cried so much and so often in the past few days, that he knew there was no point. They'd just be replaced by more.

He closed the book and set it down on the table next to his sofa. The team would probably have it soon. There was no way after his memory was wiped that they'd let him keep anything that mentioned Torchwood in it. It might not be the best apology he could come up with for them, but maybe, just maybe after Jack had retconned him they would read it and identify with why he had done it.

There was a large part of him that realised the rest of the team most likely didn't care. If they had, they would have taken the time to get to know him, or to ask him questions about his life. Instead, the instant he had started working for Torchwood, he had become the invisible man.

_'No point in deceiving yourself. This is your fault because you hid yourself from them. Jack said it to you in those exact words. They almost died because you lied to all of them.'_

He had a faint hope that maybe Jack would understand the entry for what it was. In the middle of all that insanity, he'd known the exact moment that he'd lost everything he had intimately with Jack. The instant the barrel of Jack's Webley pressed against the back of his head, he'd nearly turned around and begged him to pull the trigger. Anything would have been preferable to losing so much within a matter of hours.

Ianto lay down on his sofa and curled up as tightly as he could. He'd only had one day back before Jack told him he needed to leave. Now he had a month before Jack would decide if he could stay with Torchwood. A month of endless days and sleepless nights to look forward to. The best that he could hope for now, is that Jack wouldn't make him wait that long to retcon him. Even if he did deserve the endless suffering, he wasn't sure he could survive it.

He was so bloody tired. Sleep had become a haven that he simply couldn't reach. Every time he closed his eyes, flashbacks would inundate him behind his lids. He hadn't turned on any lights since he'd walked through his front door two days before. He knew only too well that he deserved darkness.

The feel of a hand running through his hair would have shocked him, if he had anything in him besides heartache. It was only after he realised that Jack was probably there to retcon him, that he pulled away and huddled at the end of the sofa. He glanced over to see Jack sitting on the other end, his hand resting in the same spot Ianto's head had been.

Jack said nothing to him. He just looked at him with a familiar expression on his face. It took Ianto a moment to place when he'd last seen the same expression. His mind flashed the memory before he could stop it.

--

_Ianto gasped as he tried to breathe around the press of Jack's lips. Jack pulled away from him suddenly, his features covered in pain and betrayal, his eyes hollow. Ianto saw him place his finger to his lips indicating that he shouldn't talk, but then Jack disobeyed his own warning._

_"Why didn't you tell me Ianto?" He whispered his voice laced with misery. "I might've been able to help you both. We may not have found an answer but it would've been better than all these fucking games. Why did you hide yourself from **me**?"_

_He didn't have an answer for the other man. His mind struggled as he tried to say something, **anything**, in order to ease the pain. Just as he opened his mouth to speak he heard Lisa scream out in pain. He jumped to his feet, his heart splintering as he saw Jack collapse on the floor behind him._

_While Ianto ran towards Lisa, he suddenly wished he could be two places at the same time. One part of him wanted to hold Jack, reassure him and make sure he was okay. This side of him was screaming in rage at the injustice of how much he was hurting Jack._

_The other part, the dominant side, left Jack laying there and continued to run towards the woman he loved._

--

As Ianto sat completely still on the end of his sofa, that same expression of pain and betrayal marred Jack's features. Even now, he still couldn't convince himself to comfort Jack. All he wanted to do was turn away from him and get away from those hollow blue eyes. But something inside him wouldn't let him. He deserved everything Jack did to him.

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Jack looked at Ianto as he sat huddled at the end of his sofa. Over the past week, he'd come to understand that everything he knew about Ianto was a lie. The young man had hidden himself so completely that Jack knew he would have to retcon him. He just couldn't trust him. He wasn't sure if he would ever be able to trust him again.

He'd debated over it for days, ever since he sent Ianto home on the second day. The rest of the team had finally let him be, after discovering that he wasn't a very pleasant person to be around. He kept snapping at them every time they brought something to him.

Of everyone, he'd expected Gwen to be the one to approach him. He was honestly surprised when Tosh had been the one to talk to him and set him straight. After two solid days of him yelling and grumbling at them, Tosh had come into his office, and closed the door tightly behind her. She'd sat down in the chair opposite to him, all the while ignoring his body language that was screaming at her to go away.

--

_Jack stared at Tosh, his eyes hard and cold. After everything he'd had to deal with in the past three days, he was not in the mood for any of the team's issues. As much as he wanted to care about them, he was just too damn hurt to give a fuck._

_"Jack, you need to decide what you're going to do. I know it's hard, but there are some things that cannot be solved by snapping at everyone around. Do you want Ianto to continue working here?" Tosh asked him with a mixture of determination, sadness, and regret._

_"I just don't know how Tosh. He lied to us. It doesn't matter how fucking good his coffee is or how well he takes care of us. How the hell do we trust him again? How do **I** trust him again with all of our lives?" he said, having no idea why he was suddenly being so open. It was probably the fact that Tosh was always the softest spoken and the one he trusted the most out of the rest of the team._

_Tosh stared at him, her eyes showing more calm then he'd ever seen in the young woman. She leaned forward, her voice low as she spoke to him. _

_"Ianto was one of the best employees Torchwood has ever had. Yes he lied, but wouldn't you have done the same thing for someone you love? Haven't you ever lied to save someone?" _

_She studied him for a moment as if trying to decide to continue. She must've seen something in his eyes because the next words out of her mouth shocked him to his core._

_ "__Jack, I know there was something going on between you and Ianto. I saw some of the CCTV that you forgot to erase. Don't worry, I took care of them for you." She continued, ignoring the shocked expression on his face. "You feel betrayed. I understand that. But don't make the mistake that'll eat you up inside until you can't remember the value of what life holds for you. Don't put yourself in the place you were before you started to believe you could make a difference. And for God's sake Jack, **don't** kick **your own** arse.__" _

_She sat back and took a deep breath. _

_"Ianto has more general and local knowledge than anyone I've ever met. Owen, Gwen, and I all have our specialties, but Ianto also worked for Torchwood One. He knows the system, has extensive knowledge about alien tech, and yes," she smiled at him, "he makes a damn fine cup of coffee. He's completely brilliant and an incredible asset to the team. You just need to figure out if you can get around his betrayal in order to utilise his knowledge."_

_She stood up, not waiting for his reply and walked away from his desk. When she got to his door, she paused and turned back to him._

_ "Figure it out Jack. I know you can, because you managed to trust me even after **I** betrayed the entire country to save someone I love. If you don't decide, I'm afraid Owen and Gwen are going to help you by retconning him without your approval. I'll abstain from helping them if it comes to that, but Owen does have the authority to take command and I **know** you don't want that to happen."_

_--_

Ironically enough, that wasn't what had changed his mind. She opened the door for the choice, showing him that he was taking the situation on a personal level. It had given him a new perspective. One that wasn't based around how betrayed he felt emotionally.

He'd grabbed his greatcoat, told the team he was leaving in the calmest voice he'd used in over three days, and went to find the tallest building he could, to stand on and think. Heights always seemed to clear his mind and give him a better perspective of everything that was troubling him.

When he arrived, he stood as close to the ledge as possible and replayed every moment he'd ever spent with Ianto. It took a long time to realise that there was a part of the young man that he actually did know and trust. It may be based around the sexual aspects, but he still found that Ianto was important to him and Torchwood. The young man had too much to offer them to just erase his memories and let him go.

Jack hadn't bothered to go back to Torchwood. He didn't need anything from his office or the team. Instead he'd climbed down and headed straight over to Ianto's loft. Once he got there, he'd discovered the door was unlocked. He entered Ianto's loft, to find the young man curled up on his couch with tears streaming down his face. It was at that moment that he finally understood why Ianto's betrayal had hurt him so very much. He cared about Ianto, more than he realised and more than he thought possible.

The young man was important to him, far more than he should be considering how little time Jack had actually spent with him, and how much Ianto had hidden away from the entire team.

He was finding himself unable to bridge the gap between them. Ianto was still crying and the sight of those tears made him want to gather the young man up in his arms and just tell him that everything was going to be alright, that over time the pain would start to ease.

Moving slowly, Jack slid towards Ianto. As he pulled the young man into his arms, Ianto began to struggle and fight against him. He pulled away from Jack, his struggles getting more and more violent as his hands pushed the older man away. Finally Jack couldn't take anymore.

"Ianto knock it off! I'm not going to hurt you or attack you!" Jack snapped as he grasped Ianto harder in his arms. "Please Ianto," he said softly after a moment, "please just let me help you."

Jack jumped as Ianto suddenly attacked him, his hands grasping at the front of Jack's trousers. It took him a moment before he realised Ianto was searching his pockets and not actually trying to get the catch and zip of his trousers undone.

"Ianto what are you doing?" Jack said loudly, hoping it would be enough to shock the man out of his frantic pawing.

"I know you have it somewhere here. Where's the retcon Jack? I've lost everything! Everything! And here you are to take away the only thing left. Well I may as well make it easy for you!"

The pain that Ianto was going through was clearly expelled in each word. His hands kept digging through Jack's pocket as the words wrenched out of his throat.

Jack grabbed Ianto's hands and pulled them away from his body. Despite the fact that he knew the young man wasn't aware of what he was doing, Jack's body was traitorously reacting to Ianto's unintentional groping. He didn't want to do anything that Ianto was going to regret later. Ianto was obviously in too much anguish to think straight.

He grasped both of Ianto's hands in one of his own and used the other to grasp Ianto's chin, turning the young man's grief ravaged face towards his.

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Ianto struggled against Jack's grasp. He was so bloody tired of Jack staring at him. He couldn't figure out why Jack wasn't grabbing him and forcing the fucking retcon down his throat. He knew he'd betrayed Jack and the rest of the team. He didn't deserve to be comforted.

"I don't want your fucking pity Jack! If you're going to bloody retcon me, just do it!" Ianto screamed, staring up at Jack's face.

"Ianto, I'm not here to retcon you." Jack said softly, "I'm here because I know you're hurting. You need friends and I needed to let you know that we're all still here for you."

Ianto shook his head and laughed sardonically.

"Yeah right Jack. You don't care about me. You just miss the fucking games you've been playing with me since the beginning."

Ianto struggled to remove his hands from Jack's and the older man tightened his grip.

"You should have just pulled that fucking trigger while you had a chance." Ianto said in a harsh deep voice. He heard Jack growl as the words came from his mouth.

"Ianto Jones, listen to me!"

Jack let go of Ianto's hands and reached up to grab his shoulders.

"I'm **_not_** going to take your memories! You **_are_** coming back to Torchwood and you are not **_ever_** going to say something like that to me again."

Jack's hands dug in tighter to his shoulders, but he lightened his grip when Ianto winced.

"I've forgiven you Ianto, that's why I'm here. Now you just have to forgive yourself." He said in a whisper barely loud enough for Ianto to hear over his own heavy breathing.

Ianto whimpered and collapsed into Jack's lap. His arms wrapped around Jack's body as he wept. His body wracked with sobs for a long while. Jack held onto him, letting him get comfort the only way he could.

Ianto wasn't quite sure who started it. One moment Jack was comforting him and the next he had him pressed back against the couch, grinding his hips into Ianto's. Jack's mouth was latched onto his, their tongues duelling roughly against one another. Ianto's hands grabbed at Jack's hips and pulled them into his own. He pulled his own lips away from Jack's and groaned aloud as the sensation sent spirals of pleasure throughout his body. His cock already hard and weeping as it pressed against the seam of his jeans.

He closed his eyes and ran his tongue down the side of Jack's neck, right underneath his jaw, biting down hard on the soft skin beneath his lips.

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Ianto's mouth latched onto Jack's throat as he bit down. Jack felt the young man's tongue run over the same spot soothingly before he moved down further and began to suckle and bite at his pulse point on his neck.

His cock was already so hard that it was damn near painful.

He very nearly lost it when he felt Ianto grip his ass in his palms and press their erections together. It was enough to pull him out of the lust induced stupor that was held over him. He yanked himself away from Ianto until he was standing a few steps away from the sofa breathing harshly.

"No Ianto…not yet." He said softly but loud enough for Ianto to hear him. "Not until you actually know what you're doing. You have to make up your mind on what you want first."

"Please Sir. I just need to forget…just for a little while" The words were spoken so softly that Jack could barely hear them.

Jack stared at Ianto, his eyes softening as he realised exactly what the young man was asking of him. Despite everything that had happened, he just couldn't deny Ianto when he asked him like this. He grasped Ianto's hands in his own and pulled him to his feet.

"Take me to your bedroom Ianto." He said with a whisper.

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TBC

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_AN: Reviews appreciated!!! But not necessary unless you feel kind and want to. I'll still continue even if you don't submit one. :D_


	17. Chapter 17 Comforting Touches

_AN:So um, next chapter we will see a return f something near and dear to us all. GRIN._

_Thanks go to mama rocks for the BETA. Though she did say this chapter didn't need it nearly as bad as I thought. :D_

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Chapter 17 - Comforting Touches

Ianto stared at Jack as he removed his greatcoat and draped it over the back of his easy chair. He watched Jack unbutton the sleeves of his shirt, rolling them up his arms and exposing the hard muscled forearms as he did so. He gazed at Ianto after he was done, an expectant look on his face.

Ianto dropped his own eyes to floor at the expression he saw in Jack's blue depths.

He stayed motionless in front of Jack, his heart thundering in his chest as he realised what the older man was doing. If he led Jack to his bedroom, he had to accept that he was doing it of his own free will. There would be no more excuses that he was doing this to save Lisa, no more pretence that he was just trying to hide himself. Jack was going to fuck him, but only by his rules.

The emptiness inside his soul overwhelmed him, until all he could focus on was the darkness in the room. It surrounded his mind and dulled his senses. The only thing he could hear was the soft sound of Jack's breath. He couldn't feel anything anymore. He tried to figure out what to do, but somewhere in the back of his mind, he knew he'd already made the choice. He'd shattered the moment he'd seen Lisa's body on the floor. Now, he needed to lose himself in someone else, even if it was for just one night. He needed Jack to piece him back together, to make him whole again.

Slowly, he turned and walked towards his bedroom. He felt the warmth of Jack's body as he trailed closely behind him.

When he got to the bedroom he stopped next to his bed, his eyes still on the floor. He heard Jack shut the door and then saw his feet when he came to stand in front of him.

"Take off your clothes Ianto." Jack said in a low soft voice.

Ianto didn't even pause as he began to disrobe. He dropped each item of clothing as he removed it, leaving it where it landed. On any other day, this would've driven him completely batty, but right now he just didn't care. The only thing he cared about was complying with Jack's request.

When he was completely nude he finally raised his eyes to find that Jack wasn't even looking at him. Instead he was looking around the room. As Jack finally finished his perusal, his blue eyes came back to lock on Ianto's. Ianto was surprised that Jack's gaze never wandered down past his shoulders.

Jack cleared his throat then said in a slightly hoarse voice, "Lie down on the bed Ianto."

Ianto again moved to obey, common sense directing him to flip onto his stomach. He felt Jack's hand on his hip, stopping him from rolling over. Jack looked down at him, his expression more caring then Ianto had ever seen before. There was something strange going on with Jack, and Ianto really wanted to figure it out, but he couldn't find it in him to try. He was startled at the next words that came from Jack's lips.

"We're _**not**_ going to have sex Ianto. I'm just going to help you relax and hopefully get some sleep. Do you understand?" Jack asked him, his voice thick with concern.

Ianto nodded, his eyes watering as he watched Jack move around the dark room. He wanted to cry, to scream and shout at the top of his lungs, until he couldn't breathe. For the first time in three days, the tears wouldn't fall. His shoulders slumped, his heart traitorously beating faster in anticipation of what Jack had planned.

He saw Jack grab something from on top of his wardrobe, but couldn't tell what it was in the darkness. Jack came back over to the bed, placing the item on Ianto's bedside table, before sitting down next to where he was lying on the bed. Ianto shuddered as Jack leant down and brushed a soft kiss over his lips.

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Jack stared at Ianto with concern. The young man's body was completely tense even while he was lying down. His eyes had dark circles underneath them, and Jack couldn't help but wince when he realised Ianto probably hadn't slept very much in the past few days.

"Close your eyes Ianto." He said, his voice a whisper. It hadn't been a command, but Ianto still obeyed him.

Jack almost breathed in a sigh of relief but his own eyes had strayed dangerously over Ianto's body the second Ianto's lids had shuttered closed. He took a brief moment to admire Ianto's body, debating on taking what the young man was so blatantly offering him, before strengthening his resolve and going back to his original plan.

Sliding his own body up to the top of the bed, Jack took Ianto's head in his lap. He ran his fingers lightly through the young man's hair before moving to the top and beginning to press his fingers around the tension, massaging it out. His fingertips pressed and released as his thumbs ran over the spots that Jack could feel were stress filled knots.

Ianto groaned, his body settling further on the bed. Jack moved slowly, his hands working all the tightness out of Ianto's head before moving down to his neck and shoulders. He pulled back a moment, reaching over to Ianto's bedside table and picking up the bottle of lotion he had scoured to find. He glanced down to see Ianto, his eyes open, staring at Jack with a look of unease.

Jack leaned forward and placed another soft kiss on Ianto's lips, the position, almost making him laugh aloud. He'd kissed people upside down before, but never in this type of setting. Normally it involved restraints and bondage. When he pulled back he was smiling pleasantly at Ianto, the amusement evident on his face. Ianto smiled shyly back at him and Jack felt his heart jump at the sight. The Ianto Jones that he had seen when he walked into the loft tonight had been a broken man, the one smiling up at him now, was definitely receptive to the idea of healing.

_'Is it because he knows I__'m falling for him, or because I forgave him?'_ Jack wondered idly as he gazed down towards Ianto.

Jack leaned forward again, placing another kiss on Ianto's lips before pulling back and whispering, "It's okay Ianto. Just close your eyes again."

As soon as the young man complied with his request, Jack poured the lotion on his hands and rubbed them together to warm it up. He dropped the bottle on the bed and placed his hands back on Ianto's neck, kneading the tension out with each press of his fingers.

Jack heard Ianto groan as he hit a particularly sore spot, his hips thrusting up into the air unintentionally. With a quick glance down Jack noticed that Ianto's cock was still hard. He smiled to himself as he realised that this was not what he'd first intended, but maybe he could get a little more of the seduction to play through whilst he was helping the young man.

He slid out from behind Ianto's head, placing it gently on a pillow, and moved to sit beside the young man. He began to work his way down the toned chest in front of him. When he reached Ianto's nipples, he ran his fingers around each areole, bypassing the hardened nubs in the centre. His eyes sparkled as his nails grazed over each peak, just barely causing a slight tug downwards. Jack licked his lips as Ianto groaned, his head arching back.

_'Christ Jack! What are you doing? Not seduction, comfort.'_ He thought with a hint of admonishment. He turned to look up at Ianto, glad to see he was keeping his eyes closed. He didn't want to make Ianto think he was going to have sex with him. He had to keep his resolve steady.

Jack smiled again, his hands running over the smooth flesh of Ianto's abdomen, pressing down into each ridge and taut muscle, before starting to work on his legs. He ignored the throbbing weeping cock at the apex of Ianto's legs, but allowed his hands to sweep against it occasionally as he rubbed at the upper muscles of Ianto's thighs. Every time the back of his hands brushed softly against it, Ianto's breathing grew more ragged.

His hands moved down Ianto's legs, rubbing and pressing. He laughed under his breath when Ianto jumped as Jack caressed his knees. He raised his eyes to find Ianto watching him, his eyebrow elevated in aggravation. Jack paused, his hands resting just below Ianto's knees, his own brows lifted, until Ianto got the hint and closed his eyes again.

Jack grabbed the lotion bottle and poured more in his hands as he ran his gaze up Ianto's body. As much as he wanted to think that he was still doing this for innocent reasons, he couldn't deny the feel of his own cock as it pressed painfully against the zip on his trousers. He wanted Ianto, wanted to take him and make him scream until he couldn't remember his own God damn name.

Jack sighed under his breath, belligerently reminding himself that he needed to do this for Ianto, his hands going back to relaxing the young man. He pressed harder into Ianto's tight muscles, trying to stop his fingers from caressing the way they wanted to. As soon as he reached Ianto's feet, he picked up first one, pressing his palm into the heel and his thumbs hard into the arch, then the other repeating the action.

Ianto's body lay slack on the bed in front of him. In fact, the only thing Jack could see with any amount of tension was the hard erection, still throbbing against his stomach. Softly, so as not to startle the young man, Jack whispered "Ianto turn over."

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Ianto rolled over slowly, his head clouded with sedate pleasure. If he didn't know any better, he'd have thought that Jack was trying to kill him with sensation. The moment he was on his stomach, Jack began to work his way back up Ianto's body. Jack had already found several spots on the front of Ianto's body that he didn't even know were stress filled. As he worked his way up the back of Ianto's frame, he found a number of others.

Jack ran his hands gently over the top of Ianto's thighs and he stopped himself just before he thrust forward into the bed. He wasn't sure how much more of this he could take. As it was, he was ready to grab Jack and pull him under his body, just so he could grind against him until he came. But every time he started to move, Jack would pull back from him and tell him to stay still. Jack bypassed his arse and worked his fingers and palms up to Ianto's shoulders.

Suddenly, he felt Jack's lips suckling on the skin just above his buttocks and he finally lost the battle with his body. He thrust hard down into the bed, whimpering aloud as the sheets rubbed painfully over his erection. Jack drew away and reached for Ianto's hips, pulling them up until Ianto was kneeling in front of him. Ianto tightened his eyes and groaned as he felt Jack's hands part his cheeks. He had no idea what Jack was up to, and he really didn't care. All he wanted was for Jack to keep on touching him.

He gasped and jumped, nearly pulling away when Jack's tongue snaked out to lave against his arse hole. Jack gripped his hips tightly and pulled him back, as he ran his tongue around the taut ring. The warm wet feeling sent his senses spiralling out of control. Jack's breath hit his skin and it felt like fire crawling over it. He groaned, thrusting his hips backwards and suddenly Jack began to lick and suck at his hole. Jack's tongue thrust forward, entering him, and Ianto sobbed as light flashed behind his closed eyelids.

His hips moved completely on their own, thrusting back rhythmically against the feel of Jack's tongue entering him over and over. Ianto couldn't help the groans that were coming from his throat. He was writhing in Jack's grip, his body completely out of his control. He wanted to beg, to plead with Jack, but the words wouldn't come out. He spread his legs, pressing back forcefully onto Jack's tongue as it fucked him.

Suddenly, Jack pulled back from him, his hands grasping for the bottle of lotion.

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Jack poured more lotion on his hands, still trying to figure the exact moment he'd lost control of the situation. If he had to choose, it would be when he'd kissed Ianto's lower back and the young man had whimpered. Jack had never heard anything so fucking hot as that sound when it escaped Ianto's mouth.

Jack pressed a slick finger at Ianto's entrance, teasing it with the tip. Ianto bucked backwards and Jack's finger slid inside him in one smooth move. The young man was so relaxed that his body didn't even resist the intrusion. Jack groaned, his eyes watching Ianto's muscles move as he thrust backwards several times. His mouth attacked Ianto's buttocks, licking and nibbling every bit of skin he came into contact with. He curled his finger down and rubbed over Ianto's prostate as he began to thrust in and out of the young man's body.

Ianto cried out and Jack saw him grasp a pillow tightly in both hands. His body arched, his legs spreading as he pressed back into the invading digit. Jack added another finger as he thrust hard into Ianto's body and the young man tensed for a moment before going back to the harsh pace Jack had set.

Jack began to speak softly, his voice coated with lust.

"Someday it will be my cock thrusting into your body Ianto. I'm going to fuck you so hard and fast that you won't remember anything except the feel of me moving in you."

He drew back adding another slick finger to the ones already entering Ianto's body. Ianto groaned pressing back into Jack's fingers even harder. On every thrust he brushed against Ianto's prostate, until the young man was keening, his breathing completely out of control. Jack noticed Ianto was thrusting forward, but with his hips up the way they were, he knew the young man wasn't going to get any relief.

He kept whispering his voice hoarse as he quickly flipped over and slid his head between Ianto's spread legs.

"One day soon Ianto, you are going to beg me to fuck you. You'll be screaming for it. I can't wait until I can feel your ass squeezing around my cock. As good as this feels around my fingers, I know you're going feel even better around me when I push deep inside of you and come. "

Jack increased the speed of his hand as he came level with Ianto's hard erection. It was leaking so heavily that the slit was dripping with precome. Jack licked the head a few times, the bittersweet flavour exploding over his tongue, before taking it deep in his mouth. He curled his fingers inside Ianto and pressed against his prostate, holding them there.

A harsh moan fell from Ianto's lips, his hips thrust forward, pushing his cock deep into Jack as he came hard. Jack licked around the rigid flesh throbbing in his mouth, swallowing as Ianto emptied his essence deep into his throat. He pulled back and licked a few more times before realising that Ianto was about to collapse. He slid out carefully from between Ianto's legs, removing his fingers gently out of the young man's body at the same time.

Jack sat up just as Ianto crumpled to the bed. His eyes were still tightly shut, his hands still gripping the pillow. He was gasping for air so hard that Jack began to rub his back again. He was amused when he noticed Ianto's body was completely relaxed now. He couldn't find one single tense spot anywhere he touched.

Jack stood up, walking towards the loo. He knew that he had to get out of the room. If he didn't, he was certain he was going to strip down and fuck Ianto until he couldn't see straight. The moment the door shut behind him, he reached down and clutched his hard cock through his trousers. There was no time to undo the catch and zip. He came blindingly, hunched over, his hands gripping the sink.

"Fuck Ianto." he whispered hoarsely as he shuddered with the power of the climax. He was breathing just as heavily as Ianto had been when he'd left him lying on the bed. Even now, the vision of Ianto as he'd left him was enough to make his cock jump a few more times.

He waited a few minutes, trying to regain his composure. The sticky feel of his trousers against his body brought him back to reality. He opened his trousers and wet down a cloth, washing his hands in the process, then tried to clean up as best as he could. He rinsed the cloth and walked out of the loo to clean Ianto's body.

Ianto was asleep, his breathing heavy as he curled up in sedate relaxation. Jack sighed. He really didn't want to wake Ianto but he had to get the heavy amount of lotion cleaned up. He ran the cloth lightly over Ianto's buttocks and was surprised when the young man reached back suddenly and grasped his hand.

"Jack, what about you?" he said softly as he looked at the older man, his eyelids half open.

Jack smiled down at Ianto, leaning over and brushing soft kisses over his cheeks and lips.

"Don't worry about me Ianto. This was for you. Try to get some rest okay?"

Ianto nodded as Jack finished cleaning him off. By the time he was finished the young man was breathing deeply, his eyes struggling to stay open as he watched Jack toss the wet cloth into his laundry bin. Jack leant over and picked up the clothes that Ianto had taken off earlier, tossing them in the bin as well. He saw Ianto shuddering and felt a sharp sliver of fear shoot up his spine. He rushed over to Ianto to find the young man trying to fight against sleepy laughter.

"Sorry," he said drowsily, "just never imagined _**you**_ cleaning _**my**_ room up."

Jack smiled as he leant in to kiss Ianto, his tongue flicking out to caress against the young man's lips. He pulled back just as Ianto tried to deepen the kiss. Jack knew if he let Ianto continue he would never leave.

"Well, since we have to clean up after ourselves for the next few weeks I might need the practice." he said with a slightly devilish grin. He saw Ianto's face fall at his words and mentally kicked himself.

He ran his fingers through Ianto's hair and the back of his other hand over the young man's cheek. He spoke again, this time apologetic and gentle.

"Ianto try to get some rest. Call me if you want me to come over and visit. You'll get through this. I promise."

Jack turned and let himself out of Ianto's bedroom, stopping long enough to grab his greatcoat before walking quickly to and out of the front door. He pulled the door shut behind him, making sure it was locked before he released the knob.

He knew if he stayed any longer he was going to climb into bed with Ianto, and if he did that, he was _**never**_ going to want to leave. He placed his hand, palm flat against the hard wood of the door. He tried to steady his breathing as his heart ached in his chest. As much as he wanted to stay and make love to Ianto the entire night, he knew he couldn't. Ianto needed to heal and he couldn't do that with Jack there as a constant reminder of what he'd lost.

He turned feeling as if he was leaving a part of himself behind as he walked away.

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TBC

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_AN: Reviews highly appreciated and always replied to when possible!_


	18. Chapter 18 Endless Time and Games Jack

_AN: Wristband? Janto?? Fun??? __**GRIN :P **_

_Thanks go to mama rocks for her Beta job and her endless patience with this chapter. :D_

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Chapter 18 - Endless Time and Games Jack Plays

Jack sighed in frustration as he shoved the papers he was working on into a folder. He placed it on top of a stack of others at the edge of his desk. He was getting tired of having to do all these things himself. He'd gotten so used to Ianto taking care of the filing and making sure he had signed all the necessary documents that he'd forgotten how tedious it all was. It was only in the last two and a half weeks that he realised how much he'd come to hate all the mundane tasks he was required to do.

'_Not to mention the lousy coffee we've had for the entire time.' _He thought as he grabbed another folder and pulled out the papers inside it. _'When Ianto comes back, he is never leaving this office again. Not if I have to say anything about it!' _

He growled in frustration as he realised that the only reason Ianto had been gone so long was because he had decreed it in the first place. As much as he'd like to have the young man back, he knew on this one factor he couldn't relent. Ianto had done something that deserved punishment, and he had to stick to his decision.

'_Plus he needs time to heal. Remember?'_ the thought made Jack growl again.

He wanted to help Ianto, had hoped the young man would call him. Instead he hadn't heard one word from him since the night he left Ianto's loft. After what they had done, Jack would have worried that Ianto was uncomfortable or afraid. However, the events of that night had assured him that Ianto wasn't thinking along the same lines as he used to. He'd accepted Jack and led him straight to his room, even being under the impression that Jack was going to have sex with him.

He knew Ianto wasn't avoiding him out of fear so that didn't leave many more options. It wasn't like he had a fucking manual to leaf through when it came to Ianto and his life. The young man caused him to question himself way too often and about too many things. Something he didn't enjoy and was definitely not used to when it came to his lovers.

Like when Tosh had gone to visit Ianto. She'd come to work the next day and told Jack that Ianto had asked how Jack was doing and then asked her to give Jack his regards. That was exactly how she said he'd phrased it.

'_Regards? What the fuck does that mean?'_ he thought, remembering the same questions had run through his mind when he'd heard her say it.

The whole thing was frustrating him beyond anything he'd ever remembered. Even waiting for the Doctor was starting to seem like an easy task in comparison to trying to figure out what the hell was going through Ianto's mind.

Jack glanced down and realised he was crushing the papers he was supposed to be reading in his hands. He smoothed them out as best he could, then ruined the effort when he shoved them back into the folder. He sighed and gave up trying to work as a bad joke. There was no way he was going to be able to give each item the attention it needed in order to finish what he was doing. His mind was too wrapped around Ianto and what the hell was going on with him.

'_Not to mention the fact that you also miss him. That you can't stop remembering what he looked like laying there nude in bed. Or how about the fact that this is the longest you've ever gone without some form of sex in your entire fuck__ing life. Because for some odd God damn reason you can't even find it in yourself to go out and get fucked without feeling like you'd be cheating on him!'_

Jack groaned and covered his eyes with his palms.

'_How the hell did it come to this? Wasn't this just supposed to be a seduction, a way to sate the lust? When the fuck did I start to think this way?'_

As disturbing as these questions were, it was nothing compared to suddenly being monogamous to someone who hadn't fucking called him and probably thought that he was just trying to get sex.

He sighed, threw the folders together and pulled open a drawer to hide them until Ianto came back. Instead he dropped them messily to the floor as he heard the heavy ringing sound of metal hitting the wood. Reaching into the back he moved everything out of the way and pulled out the metal wristband.

He hadn't exactly forgotten about it, but it wasn't like the band had been at the top of his priorities either. In the back of his mind he was still trying to work through what had happened the last time he'd used it. Now, he was so fucking sexually frustrated he didn't even bother to think about what he was doing or what could happen. He slipped the band on his arm and closed his eyes.

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Ianto lay restlessly on his bed. Over the last fortnight he'd read nearly every book he owned and watched enough television to turn his brain to mush. He'd run out of ways to distract himself days ago, around the same time that he'd stopped trying to convince himself that he didn't want to see Jack. He'd hoped, after Tosh visited him that Jack that would get frustrated enough to show up at his loft, swaggering in as if he owned the place. Either that or call him and demand to know why the hell he was being so formal after what Jack had done for him.

As much as he hated to admit it, Jack _**had**_ helped him more than he thought possible. After everything was said and done, Jack forgiving him had been the door that opened his mind to healing. He knew that the pain wasn't going to go away instantly, but the night that Jack had shown up marked a turning point in his grief. Jack had made him smile and even laugh. Two things he thought he'd never do again after the hell he'd gone through.

Now though, he was getting frustrated. It was getting to the point that if Jack did show up in person, he was probably going to end up punching him again. Of course, he'd probably snog him half to death afterwards, but it was the first instinct that was bothering him the most. He wanted proof that Jack needed him in his life, even if it was only to sate his never ending sex drive. Instead he hadn't heard a word from the older man. It was enough to drive him completely batty.

'_He doesn't need me at all. He's probably __been going out and shagging a different person every fucking night.'_ Ianto's mind rather unhelpfully chimed in.

Jack specified for Ianto to phone him, but he had hoped that he wouldn't have to. He didn't want to have to beg Jack to come to him. If he did that he would always be at his mercy. He'd never know if Jack only came to him because he pitied him. After everything he'd gone through with Lisa, he couldn't put himself in that type of position again. He'd saved her for love, and in turn he'd gotten in so deep he'd almost forgotten who he really was. His life had become an absolute nightmare.

'_Right, you really are a bloody woman aren't you?'_

Ianto groaned, closing his eyes in frustration. He'd never felt so alone in his entire fucking life. For the longest time he'd had Lisa and she had kept him going. Taking care of her and hiding her existence had occupied nearly every aspect of his life. Then Jack had started his seduction and he'd rarely had a free moment to even think about how fucked up his life was getting. He wasn't used to having this much time on his hands and it was really starting to drive him round the bend. Now all he had was a sister he rarely spoke to and a bunch of work colleagues that were probably pressuring Jack to retcon him while he had the chance.

'_Now be fair. Tosh stopped by didn't she?'_ Ianto smiled at the thought.

Tosh had definitely been in the cheering section when it came to him staying with Torchwood. On his one day back she'd actually brought _**him**_ coffee. But he hadn't seen or heard from Gwen at all, and even if he called and begged Owen to come over, which Ianto would _**never**_ do, he wasn't daft enough to expect him to attempt a visit.

However, Jack was another thing entirely. He just needed some sign from the man, anything that would tell him that Jack needed him in some small way.

'_It doesn't look likely that you'll ever get it.' _

The moment the thought ran through his mind, he felt something he thought had been lost to him forever. Ianto stood up quickly as the feel of Jack's hands running over his body invaded his senses. Part of him, a very small part, had hoped that Jack would be a little more cautious, but the rest of him was just happy to finally get a sign that Jack did actually want him.

'_Please.'_ He thought in silent prayer just before he closed his eyes.

When he opened them, Jack was standing in front of him, further away than he'd expected. Ianto stared at him, his eyes watering at what this meant. The fact that Jack was willing to invade his mind, implied so much. He grinned wickedly as Jack stalked towards him, the glint of the metal wristband sparkling in the faint bluish light that surrounded them.

Over the past two weeks he'd finally remembered where he had seen that wristband before. Not only had it been in his most realistic dreams of Jack, but he'd also seen one like it when he had worked for Torchwood London.

Jack was using alien tech without fully understanding it. This might have been amusing except Ianto was anxious about the implications it raised for their future relationship. But it certainly did explain a lot of the emotions that drove him crazy in the beginning when Jack had first started trying to seduce him. It also clarified a few of the things that hadn't made sense over the past few months. Like the fact that he could smell Jack in a room, hear his thoughts occasionally, and feel Jack touching him, all when he wasn't physically there.

The moment Jack reached him, he didn't even pause before he started kissing Ianto. Ianto gave back just as good as he got, thrusting his tongue into Jack's mouth, exploring the wet depths of it. He grabbed Jack pulling him flush against his own body as he grasped Jack's arse in his hands. Jack pulled away from him and Ianto felt a warm rush of pleasure go up his spine at the look on the older man's face. His eyes were filled with lust as he began to tugging at Ianto's clothes. He allowed Jack to remove his shirt, but grabbed his hands before he could unbutton the jeans he was wearing.

"Christ Ianto. I need to fuck you!" Jack growled out, his voice low and hoarse.

Ianto smiled sardonically before stepping away.

"No you don't. You need me to fuck you Jack. I can read it in your mind."

Jack's face registered a moment of shock but Ianto didn't allow him to dwell on it. Instead he reached forward and practically tore at Jack's clothes, yanking off every single article of clothing he was wearing in mere seconds. He was amused when he noticed that Jack still wasn't wearing any underwear. The man was apparently always ready for sex, no matter what the circumstances.

Ianto pushed Jack backwards until his legs hit the edge of the bed. He collapsed on top of it a stunned but heated expression on his face. Ianto leaned over and dug through Jack's trousers to pull out the lube he knew would be there. He turned to look down at Jack and began to unbutton his own jeans, letting them fall to the floor without thinking twice about it. Leaning forward, he caught Jack's lips in a deep kiss, his tongue thrusting into Jack's mouth, tangling with the older man's. Jack moaned, reaching up to grasp Ianto's arms and tried to pull him onto the bed.

Ianto pulled back, grinning lustfully as he arched his eyebrow at Jack. He reached down and grasped Jack's hands in his own, then pulled them towards the metal headboard. Using his own hands as a guide, he wrapped Jacks' fingers around the thin bars.

"Don't move your hands Sir. Keep them there or this will stop. Do you understand? No need to talk, a simple nod will suffice."

Jack moved his head up and down, his eyes open wide. He was gasping for air, his cock hard and throbbing against his stomach. Ianto would have laughed if he wasn't so bloody turned on himself. He removed his hands from Jack's and began to run them over Jack's body. Touches so soft and light, that Jack was arching up into his palms every time he ran one of his hands over the velvety skin.

Ianto leaned forward, his breath ghosting over and into Jack's ear as he spoke in a low rough voice.

"You want me to fuck you Jack. You need to feel my cock moving in your body. You want to feel my hips slam into your arse, as I fuck you hard and fast. You're so bloody turned on right now that it's all you can think of. You don't want to fuck me Jack. Not right now."

He climbed onto the bed, pressing his body flush down onto Jack's. He thrust his hips forward, making sure their erections rubbed against one another and created a tantalising friction. Jack bucked up into him, his hands releasing the railing. The moment he did, Ianto pulled away from him, sitting between Jack's legs on his knees. He glared at Jack and the older man reached up again to grasp the metal bars in his hands.

Ianto lay back on top of him, his tongue snaking out to lick around the edge of Jack's ear. He grasped the lobe between his teeth and bit down, running the flesh back and forth between them. Releasing it he spoke again, this time a whisper.

"What do you think Sir? Am I reading your mind?"

As Ianto pulled back and pressed their cocks together again, Jack nodded once more. Ianto smiled down at him, Jack's heart was thudding so heavily in his chest that he could feel it against his own. Ianto's tongue flicked out to outline Jack's lips. Jack released one to the metal bars to grasp him by his hair and pull him into a deep open mouth kiss. Ianto allowed him to kiss him for a moment before grabbing Jack's hand removing it from his head, and placing it back on the railing. He sucked on Jack's lower lip, biting down softly before soothing it with his tongue.

Ianto began to move down Jack's body, placing hard open mouth kisses over every bit of skin he could, his tongue flicking out to taste the sweat that was beginning to cover Jack's flesh. Jack groaned, his hands tightening around the metal bars, as Ianto took an erect nipple between his teeth and flicked it with his tongue. He sucked it into his mouth as hard as possible, pulling away just before he knew it would become painful for the other man. Running his tongue out and licking his way across Jack's chest, he treated the other nipple with the same rough tease.

Jack was shaking under him, his body trembling so hard that Ianto almost became concerned. But when he pulled away to look at Jack's face, he saw something that almost made _**him**_ shudder. Jack was looking at him with complete unbridled raw lust filling his eyes. As their eyes locked, Jack moaned and threw his head back, his neck arching. Ianto felt his cock twitch at the sound as it travelled through the air. A vibration shivered down his spine as his own cock became impossibly harder than it already was.

Ianto's hands ran up Jack's sides until they reached his chest. Taking a stiff nipple in between each finger and thumb, Ianto tweaked them as his mouth began to move downward.

Ianto grinned wickedly when he read what was in Jack's mind. Instead of following the thought, he ignored Jack's cock and grasped his legs pulling them up and open. He remembered what it had felt like when Jack had done this to him and he really wanted to return the sensations.

'_What the hell am I doing?'_ He thought as a sudden moment of clarity shot through him.

He paused for a moment, hoping Jack wouldn't notice his nervousness. His eyes travelled over Jack's form and the sight of his boss, so pliant under his hands drove all the uncertainty out of his mind. He'd worry about it later, when he wasn't so bloody turned on.

Leaning forward, Ianto flicked his tongue over tight ring of muscle, feeling it flex as he laved it. The moment he did, Jack growled and tried to thrust his body further against Ianto's mouth.

'_Never thought I'd be able to make Jack completely speechless.' _

He tried not to laugh but a sharp chuckle escaped him, the breath running over Jack's skin and causing him to writhe within Ianto's grip. He held Jack tighter, his hands slipping against the sweaty skin, as he began to lick at Jack's entrance. Making his tongue into a point, he plunged it into Jack's body.

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As Ianto drove his tongue into his body, Jack groaned and clenched his fingers around the bars of the headboard tighter. He vaguely realised that he was completely at Ianto's mercy, but he really couldn't find it in himself to resist. It really did seem like the young man was reading his mind. All he knew was that if Ianto kept rimming him, he was going to come from just that sensation alone. The wet warmth of Ianto's tongue thrust into him again and he felt his cock throb against his abdomen.

His body coiled, every sensation travelled to his erection. Just as he was about to scream, Ianto pulled away and knelt between his legs. He felt Ianto's cock press against his entrance, the head slick. He had just enough brain function to notice that Ianto had managed to lube his cock and that he was going to fuck him without any further prep, before the young man slowly began to push into his body.

The thought alone nearly made Jack come. Very few of his lovers had known that when he was this sexually frustrated, he needed the burn, needed the mixture of pleasure with a slight touch of pain. Otherwise he would just get more frustrated and be unable to come.

He groaned, low and deep in his throat, as the head of Ianto's cock popped inside of him. His body clenched down on the invading member and he heard Ianto groan as he thrust shallowly a few times, driving his cock a little deeper into Jack's body.

Jack arched his hips, pressing further against Ianto's body in an attempt to get the young man's cock deeper in him. Ianto grinned at him, his eyes sparkling, as he pulled back from the movement, withdrawing his cock completely. He pressed forward, the head entering Jack's body, then pulled back out again. Jack groaned, fighting the urge to scream as Ianto repeated the move several more times. Finally, he couldn't take anymore.

"Fu..."

He started to shout at the exact same time that Ianto drove into him completely, causing him to lose the rest of the demand. He screamed, his body clenching down tightly on Ianto's cock as the young man drew back and thrust into him again. Jack tightened his thigh muscles as he pressed into Ianto's thrusts, his hands clutching the railings in a deathly tight grip.

Ianto grinned down at him as he moved Jack's legs to his shoulders and began thrusting in earnest. He felt Ianto shift his hips further up and realised he'd started chanting as the young man's cock dragged over his prostate with each movement in and out of his body.

"Fuck yes Ianto. Fuck me. Oh God, fuck me." He repeated over and over, as Ianto sped up, his thrusting became impossibly faster.

Ianto's hands grasped Jack's hips, his nails digging into Jack's skin as he used the grip to guide Jack's body against his. Jack released one of the railings, his hand travelling down to his cock only to be smacked away by one of Ianto's.

"You are going to come from me fucking you, just the way you want to Sir."

Ianto pulled back and thrust harder and faster into Jack. His hips became uneven as Jack clenched his body around Ianto's cock again.

"And you're going to do it right now."

Ianto was gasping for air, the words so broken that Jack could barely understand him. The moment it registered in his mind exactly what Ianto had said, his body shuddered. Jack arched, gripping the bars in his hands as bright flashes of light exploded behind his eyelids. He writhed, his cock jumping, come covering his abdomen, while Ianto continued propelling into his body at a fierce and almost brutal pace.

Ianto's frame stuttered, his movements erratic as he suddenly gripped Jack's hips and plunged into his body as deep as possible. He tensed against Jack's arse, his hips jerking spasmodically. Jack felt Ianto's cock as it throbbed inside him, the come warm and liquid as it coated his insides.

Ianto released his hips, his legs falling around Ianto's, and collapsed on top of him, their bodies' slick with sweat and come. He could feel Ianto's heart beating against his own, the rhythms almost tantric and he smiled sedately as he wrapped his arm around the young man, allowing him to recover. Jack's mind was completely scrambled but he had just enough presence of mind to realise that in all of his life, he'd never had anyone who had brought him that quickly to the edge. He brushed his lips across Ianto's forehead as their breathing began to even.

Ianto looked up at him, smiling as he leant forward and began to kiss Jack deeply. Their tongues tangled wetly, caressing one another in almost an after echo of what their bodies had just done. Ianto pulled away from him, smiling wickedly as he reached up and snapped the wristband off Jack's arm.

Jack's eyes flew open, his mouth grimacing as he looked around. He was back in his office, his clothes a messy pile next to him. He sank down into his chair, jumping when he realised that his arse throbbed as it met the leather.

'_Well, that was different,'_ he thought with a tone of smugness and contentment.

Just then he glanced down and noticed the wristband was no longer on his arm.

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TBC

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_AN:__ Long chapter for you guys. But as a warning it's been a rough week for me. I've been sick all week and last night my cat got sick and I had to rush him to the vet. Now I'm worried sick about him cause they can't figure out what's wrong, which isn't helping me get better! I am working on the next chapter, but try not to expect one every few days like it was for a short while. Thanks everyone!!!_


	19. Chapter 19 Confrontations and Confessi

_AN: Okay, so my cold is gone, my kitty's not so much. Anyways, enjoy another somewhat long chapter. Reviews appreciated!!!_

_Thanks to mama rocks for the quick Beta and helping me figure out a culture credence. :D_

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Chapter 19 - Confrontations and Confessions

Ianto stared at the shower wall as he let the water cascade down his frame. The liquid hit every sore spot and every muscle, helping to ease the chill from deep in his bones. He was still shuddering from the shock of what he had done. Not only was Jack now aware that he knew about the wristband, but he had taken it from Jack in the dream world. Only after he had done it did he realise the implications of what this was going to mean.

He had fully expected Jack to come storming into his loft demanding to know exactly how long Ianto had known what was going on. In fact, he had waited for him to show up for over an hour before finally giving up.

By that point a shower had sounded like a great idea. He just couldn't stand smelling like Jack any longer. It reminded him of just how far Jack was willing to go to fulfil his selfish desires. The idea that Jack was willing to pretend that nothing was going on, or that he hadn't been using the wristband for his own nefarious purposes, was more than disturbing.

As he climbed out of the shower, he glanced down at the wristband sitting on the counter. He hadn't wanted to let the damn thing out of his sight. If he'd left it out of the bathroom, Jack may have stopped by, seen it and decided to take it without telling him. Then he probably would've hidden it, hoping Ianto wouldn't bring it up, or think it was still a dream.

Of course the reality was that he already knew about it. No matter what Jack tried he wouldn't be able to talk his way out of this one.

Ianto sighed as he dried off and started tugging on his clothing. At this point, he could only think of two feasible things to do. He could wait until he was allowed to go back to work, meanwhile driving himself and probably Jack, crazy, or he could go in and confront him now. He wasn't about to leave it alone so that wasn't even an option he considered.

If he chose to go in, there was always the possibility that someone else would be there. Torchwood didn't exactly keep normal hours, and he had no idea how busy the rift had been in his absence. Then again, his chances were actually good that no one would be there. If there had been someone working, Jack would've never used the wristband and taken the chance that someone would see him in that type of situation.

'_Then again, Jack can be a right exhibitionist. Remember that time Suzie had nearly screamed because he was walking towards his office and stripping off all of his clothes at the same time? His excuse of being covered in alien guts hadn't exactly been logical, since he wasn't the only one.'_

Ianto smiled at the memory as he also remembered that Tosh had nearly fallen out of her chair laughing at Suzie's reaction.

'_Still being naked and being observed having an orgasm with an invisible lover were two entirely different things.'_ he thought as he looked in the mirror and combed his hair.

'_I remember the tests from Torchwood London on that ring. That couple of employees had blushed for nearly a week after they'd seen the recordings. They'd also tried to refuse using it again. '_

Ianto picked up the wristband and shoved it in his pocket, then left the bathroom. He walked quickly through his bedroom, grabbing the button from Jack's shirt and dropping it into one of the pockets of the coat he'd picked up.

He was still putting on his coat when he walked through the front door of his loft. Only as he was locking it behind him did he realise he'd already made up his mind. He was going to the Hub. He needed to confront Jack and see what the hell he'd been thinking when he'd used that wristband. Of course, he knew there probably hadn't been much thinking involved. That was how the bloody technology worked sometimes.

'_Especially when it comes to sex crazed aliens.'_ He thought with a cynical smile as he climbed in his car and started the engine.

'_Which, considering what era Jack was from, almost includes him as well.'_

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Jack glared around his office, hoping that the wristband would magically appear in front of him. He'd spent the past hour looking for it, with absolutely no luck. After losing that damn button the last time, he'd known he shouldn't have expected to find it, but there had still been a slight shred of optimism that maybe it had just fallen off his wrist. The best that he could hope for now, was that it had evaporated or broken and been left behind in that dream world. Because if it hadn't, that meant Ianto had it. And if that was true, he knew the young man was going to have a few choice words to say to him.

Sighing he stood up and went to take a shower. He hadn't bothered with anything but pulling on his trousers before tearing apart his office, and he still smelled suspiciously of sex. If Ianto showed up, he didn't want the man to have any more proof then he already did. The wristband was already damning enough.

When he got out of the shower, he tilted his head in confusion. The air was heavy with the aroma of coffee and not the stuff that Tosh brought them. This was the good stuff, a spicy and dark smell that only saturated the place when Ianto was making coffee for everyone in the Hub. He quickly dressed and walked towards his office. When he entered the room he saw his coffee cup on his desk, steam still rising from it. He approached it slowly, looking down at the cup with extreme suspicion.

"It's not poisoned." Ianto said suddenly from behind him.

Jack winced and stopped himself from jerking in surprise. He turned around to see Ianto standing there with a slight smirk on his face, his blue-grey eyes shimmering with an unreadable expression. He took a step backwards, his heart thundering in his chest. Ianto was actually making him nervous, something that didn't happen very often. If he didn't know any better, he'd have thought that the young man was deliberately trying to put him on edge. He turned away from Ianto, trying not to let him see how frustrated he was, then pivoted around his desk and dropped into his chair. He just barely remembered not to sit too fast. He didn't want Ianto to see him flinch and he was definitely still sore from their bout of lovemaking.

He felt inordinately safer once he had the desk as a barrier between them. When he was sitting there, he was Ianto's boss, he didn't need to make excuses for his behaviour. He finally looked back at the young man only to find him glancing between the coffee cup and Jack. Ianto smiled serenely and gestured towards it as he sat in the chair across from Jack.

Jack bit his lip and picked up the cup. As much as he'd missed Ianto's coffee, he was a little worried at how the young man was acting. He hadn't expected Ianto to come in and approach him calmly. In fact, if he was being honest with himself, he'd thought Ianto would be screaming at him by now. It was all just a little too surreal, a little too psychotic.

'_Not to mention the fact that he hasn't exactly said anything beyond the fact that he isn't trying to kill you.' _

Ianto obviously had _**something**_ planned. However, he was pretty _**sure**_ that Ianto wouldn't poison him. Even if he was aware of Jack's ability to resurrect, and Jack was fairly confident that he wasn't, Ianto didn't exactly seem like the murdering kind. He was obviously being paranoid. In fact the idea that Ianto was freaking him out so much was almost laughable.

He smiled, suddenly a lot more relaxed that he had been since he'd appeared back at the hub.

Picking up his cup, he took a small sip of coffee. The provocative taste of it coated his tongue with a rich flavour that actually made him moan aloud. He looked at Ianto, hoping his appreciation was clearly visible to the young man before gripping the cup tightly in both hands, closing his eyes and taking a much bigger drink. The moment he did a sharp ringing sound of metal hitting wood echoed on the desk in front of him.

His eyes flew open, his throat constricting at the noise, as he inelegantly choked and spit out the coffee all over his desk. Jack grimaced when his gaze locked on the wristband. He looked up at Ianto through his eyelashes, to find the young man glaring at him with a hint of expectancy on his face.

Jack opened his mouth to say something, anything, then closed it again when he realised he had no idea what to tell Ianto. Instead of speaking, he raised his eyebrows and shook his head at Ianto in what he hoped was a questioning manner. Ianto just rolled his eyes in response, stood up and walked out of his office.

'_What the hell?'_ he thought as he stood up behind his desk.

Ianto came back just as quickly as he left holding a roll of paper towels out to Jack. Jack started cleaning up the coffee watching Ianto the entire time. The young man looked slightly distressed as he stared around the office, his eyes locking on the files all over the floor then flicking out to the mess in the Hub. He sighed heavily, shrugged his shoulders, then went to sit back down in the chair he'd vacated earlier.

Jack finished mopping up the coffee, and suddenly realised why Ianto had rolled his eyes when he'd tried to look innocent. As soon as he'd choked and that coffee ended up all over the desktop, he'd pretty much admitted his guilt.

'_Nice Jack. Real smooth. For someone who hardly lets anyone get to you, you certainly screwed that up!_'

If he'd had kept his cool a little better, then he might've been able to pull off the fact that he didn't know what the wristband was. Now he was obviously going to have to answer some questions. This was a hell of a lot more frustrating than he'd ever intended it to be. All he'd ever wanted was to have a little fun. Now though, because of emotions he'd _**never**_ intended to have, he had no idea how to handle this situation.

'_Whatever happened to shagging Ianto and then keeping him around for a little fun?'_

Ianto stood up suddenly, his eyes hard and angry.

"Do you have any idea what that is sir?"

Jack frowned, suddenly feeling like a little kid getting reprimanded. If any of the other members of Torchwood ever spoke to him in that tone of voice, he'd have fired them and retconned them so fast that they _**literally**_ wouldn't have known what hit them.

"It appears to be a metal bracelet Ianto. What's so special about it?"

Ianto rolled his eyes, his tone icy when he responded.

"Yes sir. You already know that, obviously, since you've been using it for the past few months. Do you have any idea what you did when you decided to use that bloody thing on me? Do you even know what alien race it's from? Did you bother to fucking research it at all?"

Jack drew his eyebrows tight and looked at Ianto with a confused expression on his face.

"What the hell are you talking about Ianto?"

Ianto reached into his coat, grabbed Jack's hand from the desk and dropped something into it. He stared down at it a flush creeping up his face when he saw his missing button in his hand. He looked back up at Ianto, just in time to see anger in his eyes.

"Bloody hell! I'm not an idiot Jack! Did you forget that in your ever increasing need to get sex from me? Just because I tried to save someone I loved does not mean my fucking mind went when she died! Now that thing," he gestured towards the wristband, "has been controlling you on some level that you didn't even know about. Didn't you find it odd that you weren't questioning it? Or that you didn't feel the need to find out anything about it?"

Ianto leant forward and dropped his voice somewhat menacingly.

"How about the fact that you knew what it did before you even used it?"

Ianto pointed at the wristband again, this time with a look of contempt.

"_**That**_ is from a race of aliens that you _**had**_ to have known about since they are all about the benefits of lust induced games. They're called the Yefarins."

When Ianto said the name Jack looked down at the wristband again, this time in disbelief. He could tell that Ianto knew he'd placed it as soon as he said it. He picked it up and studied the writing he'd seen on it months ago.

'_Christ why didn't I notice that?'_ the instant the thought crossed his mind, he knew the answer.

The Yefarins were a race that used trickery and submission in order to get whatever pleasure they could. Most of the time, metal objects were used to induce a simple lust haze over the mind of their subjects. These objects normally gave the wearer total control over whomever they were fascinated with, but unless they removed the object on a daily basis, they could turn someone catatonic with lust. These objects had a tendency to _**make**_ someone want to use them and not wonder why. It also created an emotional and mental bond between the wearer and the one in whom they were interested.

For once, in the past few months, Jack felt a small sense of relief. He obviously _**wasn't**_ actually starting to care about Ianto more than he intended, it was the God damn wristband that was causing the problem. He dropped it to the desk and looked up at Ianto with a cocky grin on his face.

"So it's probably a bad idea to continue using it." He said to Ianto, the young man's face going from amused to shock as he spoke.

"Yes Sir. I would bloody well say so. Unless you _**want**_ to be emotionally attached to me?" he said in a subdued voice as he looked at the floor.

Jack stood up and walked around his desk. He looked down at Ianto, his eyes alight with amusement. When Ianto failed to look up at him, he knelt before the young man and placed his hands on Ianto's knees. He wasn't sure how to tell Ianto about why he couldn't become attached, but he had to say something.

"Ianto," he said softly.

When the young man finally looked towards him he leant in and kissed him softly before continuing.

"There are reasons that I can't allow that. Not only are you still trying to get through what just happened with Lisa, but I have something that could take me away at any time. Once I leave, I'm not sure if I'll ever come back. It's a bad idea for both of us."

Ianto's eyes shifted away from his, staring around the office. He pulled away from Jack and stood up, taking a few steps away from him.

"You really should have thought of that before you started these games Jack. Depending on how many times you've used it, will determine how deep you've gotten both of us. Now, if you don't mind," he reached over and grabbed the wristband, "I know I'm not supposed to be working, but I _**am**_ going to put _**this**_ in the archives, then I'll go home."

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Ianto turned away from Jack and walked out of his office. He tried to focus on his breathing, and not rushing out or stomping as he left. He was too angry not to let some of it show so as soon as he reached the stairway that led to the archives he yanked open the door and then let it bang shut behind him. In the split second the slamming sound took to reach his ears, he cringed.

'_What the hell am I so upset about? Do I honestly want a __**relationship**__ with him? Hello, I'm not gay! __**Remember**__?'_

The instant he reminded himself of that fact his whole body relaxed. He smiled to himself, his anger dissipating as quickly as it had started.

He turned around, ready to go apologise to Jack, when the door was jerked open in front of him. He saw Jack standing in the doorway, his eyes narrowing when he spotted the smile on Ianto's face. Before he could figure out why Jack was looking at him so angrily, the older man grabbed him and pressed him against the wall, their bodies flush against one another's.

"Ianto Jones, I think we still have a few things that we need to talk about."

Ianto gasped as Jack spoke the words in a low menacing tone.

"Do you even realise," Jack rocked his groin hard into Ianto's as he spoke, "that I may still want something from you? Just because emotions don't play a part, doesn't mean that I don't still want to fuck you. In fact, it'll be a hell of a lot more fun for you this way. At least if you just give into the seduction, then you don't have to worry about those quaint categories that humans love so much."

Jack leant in to Ianto and suckled on his lower lip. Ianto moaned, the sound getting lost as Jack captured his lips. He thrust his own hips forward and Jack's hands grasped his hips pulling them closer together. Jack leant in, his lips ghosting over Ianto's skin as he licked his way along his neck.

Ianto groaned, his eyes closing when Jack's mouth wrapped around his ear and bit down. He heard Jack whispering and struggled to focus enough to understand what the other man was saying.

"I knew you'd want this Ianto. You just can't resist me can you?"

Ianto's eyelids flew open, his hands coming up to push Jack away from him. He glared at Jack, his eyes narrowed, anger coating every feature of his face.

"Not everything is about you _**Sir**_. Maybe you should try to understand that before you approach me and try to sexually harass me again." he said with an icy tone.

He turned away from Jack and left the Hub as quickly as he could. As he was getting into his car, he glanced down and realised he was still holding the wristband in his hand.

'_I'll bring it back next week__ when my suspension ends__. There is no way in hell I'll give him the satisfaction of going back in there._'He thought as he started the engine. _'For once, let Captain Bloody Harkness have to wait for me!'_

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TBC

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_AN: Still trying to figure out if Jack deserves forgiveness...lol. Well, what do ya think?_


	20. Chapter 20 Late Night Dalliances

_AN:Thanks go to mama rocks for her excellent beta job and all the help she gives me!  
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Chapter 20 - Late Night Dalliances

Ianto parted the slats of the blinds, peering out into the rainy night and being careful not to let any light filter through. The room was dark around him, but he was still worried about the lamp he had on in the other room. If Jack knew he was watching, he'd probably get even cockier then he already was. Considering how he'd left things three days before, he wasn't about to add fuel to the fire. He felt a satisfied smirk flit over his face as he saw Jack walk by the building again. It was fourth time he'd made an appearance in the past half hour.

_'He might as well be standing underneath my window for how subtle he's being.'_ Ianto thought with amusement.

Ianto frowned, his eyebrows furrowing in worry. _'He's getting a little obsessive, isn't he?'_

He had no idea why, but Jack had spent practically every night since he'd stormed out of the Hub, walking by his tenement and casting furtive glances up at his windows. It was beyond strange that the man claimed not to care about him, yet spent all that time watching for him. He was starting to get the impression that maybe Jack was waiting for him to make the first move towards reconciliation.

_'That's not going to happen! If Jack wants to apologise he's going to have to come to me.'_ He thought with determination as he peered through the blinds again.

The rain was beginning to dim the night even further as it started to come down harder and faster. Ianto struggled to focus on Jack's face hoping he could read his eyes, even though he knew he was too far away to be able to see them. Jack's face turned towards the window he was looking out of and Ianto pulled away quickly. His breath caught in his throat, his heart pounding furiously at what he'd just seen in Jack's expression.

_'For a man who claimed he couldn't care about me, he certainly looks like he feels something.' _He ruminated with a heavy sigh.

He had no idea what to do. It wasn't as if he and Jack had a relationship, and it certainly wasn't like he would know if something had happened at Torchwood in his absence. The only thing he'd noticed when he'd been there the other night was how very messy it had been. On the other hand, he'd been too frustrated with Jack to pay too much attention to it.

In the past three days Ianto had a lot of time to think things through. Only now, as he was standing next to the window, did he realise why Jack's words and attitude had frustrated him so much. Not only had they been selfish, but his own reactions to Jack's ministrations had caused him to question himself on several different levels. He'd come to understand that he didn't have to be gay to be attracted to Jack. It was inherent that to know Jack, was to want him.

However, the emotional attachment he felt towards Jack was entirely a different matter. The wristband may have played a part, but since Jack hadn't worn it on a regular basis, it couldn't have been that conducive.

Ianto glanced at his mobile sitting on the edge of his bedside table as he debated on calling Tosh to see if something had happened. He couldn't assume the expression reflected on Jack's face had anything to do with him. If he did that he'd only get angry again the moment Jack turned it back around on him and made him think that there was something more than lust between them.

He debated it for several moments, weighing the pros and cons of getting some answers. If he did call Tosh and she told him nothing was going on at Torchwood, he would just get his hopes up. He couldn't afford to let Jack affect him that way again. However, he also knew that if called her and she told him about some horrific problem, he'd lose what little hope he had left for whatever it was that was going on between him and Jack.

He peered through the blinds again to find Jack gone from his view. Just as he picked up the mobile he heard a knock echo though his loft. He put the phone back down and walked to the front door, placing his hand on the lock, still trying to decide if he was going to open it.

The knock came again, a little louder, almost pounding against the heavy wood.

_'If I don't let him in, he'll probably just break down the bloody door.'_ He thought with annoyance as he moved to unbolt it.

He closed his eyes briefly as he pulled the door ajar, opening them to see Jack standing in front of him, drops of moisture dripping from his dark hair, his greatcoat dark from the water soaked into it. Pain and heartache coated every aspect of Jack's handsome face. His blue eyes were wet in a way that the rain couldn't explain and Ianto winced. His own blue-grey gaze locked onto the hurt expression and he felt his heart stutter as he realised what this could mean.

_'Guess it's raining harder than I thought.' _ Ianto thought randomly and a little wildly as he stared at the man in front of him.

Ianto sighed and made a decision that he was certain he would probably regret. However, he also knew that if he didn't give Jack a chance he'd always wonder about what the older man had to say.

"Hello." he said softly as he held out his hand to Jack.

----------

Jack grasped Ianto's hand tightly allowing him to lead him into the loft. Ianto stopped in the middle of the living room, leaving him standing there as he went to shut the front door. He felt himself shivering but didn't move from the spot that Ianto had left him at. He couldn't concentrate on anything besides the fact that Ianto had led him inside without any hesitation whatsoever. He hadn't yelled or slammed the door in his face like he'd expected the young man to. Instead he'd held out his hand in invitation, almost as if nothing irremediably upsetting had happened between them. Ianto didn't speak again, he just walked around Jack and towards his bedroom.

Jack remained standing where he was. After the hell he'd been through for the past 3 days, he wasn't going to presume anything. If the young man wanted him to follow, he was going to have to come back and get him. He figured it was highly unlikely that Ianto wanted anything sexual from him. Just because he'd brought him inside, didn't mean he was forgiven for his transgressions.

After Ianto stormed out of the Hub, he'd pretty much shrugged the whole situation off and assumed that Ianto was just too damn picky and emotional to bother with. He figured he would still keep the young man around, just not for the purposes he'd initially intended. Ianto was knowledgeable and very good at what he did. Jack had managed to get a few months of satisfaction and figured maybe that would be enough. Even if it wasn't what he'd originally intended, it was the most obvious solution.

However, something about what Ianto had said to him that night kept bothering him. It didn't matter what Jack did the next day, he found himself thinking about Ianto's insistence that not everything was about him. The words echoed through his mind over and over, keeping him beyond preoccupied. His mind had been so inattentive that he'd managed to get himself killed by tripping over a God damned book in his office and falling down into his cubby hole, cracking his head open on the floor. It was good thing that nobody else was around at the time it happened. He hadn't been in any shape to explain his resurrection to Owen or Tosh, much less deal with Gwen and her emotional indecisions.

After he'd gasped back to life, he'd spent the rest of the evening trying to figure out why the whole situation was bothering him, simply to be confronted with the very painful realisation that Ianto actually had a point. He'd been fairly self-centred and enormously callous ever since he'd started his seduction. Not only had he teased the young man, nearly to the point of frustration, but he'd also blown him off completely when it came to admitting how supercilious he'd been behaving.

In fact, the only time he could really see that he'd done anything selfless for Ianto had been the night he'd stopped by and comforted the young man. But even that had led to something more than comfort.

Without even thinking of what he was doing, he'd driven over to Ianto's building, merely to find himself unable to even approach the entrance, much less not knowing what to say if Ianto actually opened the door to him. So, instead of following what seemed to be the proper approach, he'd wandered around Ianto's tenement, staring up at the windows. Hoping to get a glimpse of the young man, thinking maybe it would help give him a better answer.

It was either that or actually give in to the idea that he cared about Ianto and that the wristband had very little to do with the emotional turmoil he was suffering. If he did that, he would never be able to turn back into the insouciant time agent he once was, someone who could leave everything behind without a second glance. He'd never allowed anyone to persuade him to settle down, despite how many times he'd actually felt the stirrings of love. Even Estelle and her various charms hadn't been able to hold onto him. Though he'd made sure she was doing well over the years since they'd been together, he never regretted running away from her. It had been the best option and given her a chance to live a normal life.

However, when it came to Ianto, he worried that the young man might actually be more than he'd ever bargained for. If he admitted all of the feelings he had for Ianto, he'd also have to admit that the young man might be the one person he wouldn't be able to run from. Then he would have to deal with the very real possibility that Ianto could be, and more than likely **_would_** be, taken from him before he was ready to let him go.

After two nights of wandering around the building and working with less sleep than he remembered having in over a hundred years, he made a decision that he knew was going affect his life. He wasn't ready for the pain the thought of losing Ianto gave him, but on a much deeper level, he wasn't willing to give up the time he could spend with young man either.

That's when he was struck with a new dilemma. He had no idea how he was going to get Ianto to understand or to listen to what he had to say.

On his third night of standing outside Ianto's tenement, he'd finally seen something that gave him hope. As he'd been gazing up at one of Ianto's windows, the rain, dripping into his eyes and slightly blurring his vision, he'd seen the blinds snap shut as if someone had just released them. Without even thinking what he was doing he entered the building and knocked on Ianto's front door.

This led him to where he was now, afraid to make any move at all, lest he screw things up again.

Ianto came back into the room and stood in front of him, holding out a towel. Jack didn't take it. Instead he stood in front of Ianto and studied the young man's expression. He saw a small smile flicker over Ianto's lips, but it didn't reflect in his eyes. Instead, when Jack focused on them he saw only pain, a hurt so deep that it made him cringe internally with the knowledge that he was the one to put it there.

Jack shivered harder, not even realising his teeth were chattering until Ianto's hand came up and ran along his jaw. After a moment, Ianto's gaze locked on his and he saw the young man's shoulders shift as he sighed heavily. Ianto raised the towel to Jack's head and began to dry his hair.

----------

Ianto ran the towel over Jack until he was reasonably sure that his hair was as dry as he was going to get it. He had no idea what was going on, but the fact that Jack was standing in his living room and not speaking put him on edge. He was obviously freezing, the icy rain having soaked through his coat and into his clothes beneath. He dropped the towel on his sofa then reached forward to pull off his greatcoat. Jack tensed and Ianto felt the last of his patience snap.

"Would you just bloody stop? I'm not the one who invaded your fucking mind for months, while keeping you frustrated and on edge!"

He yanked Jack's coat off his shoulders and threw it over the back of a chair.

"If you don't get out of these wet clothes, you'll catch your death, and that's the last thing I need right now! I can barely keep up with you when you're actually healthy, I can't imagine how bad you'd be if I had to nurse you through a bloody cold."

Ianto grabbed Jack's arm and almost dragged him towards his bedroom. He figured he could get Jack into the shower, and hopefully that would be enough to warm him up. He tried to ignore the way Jack's body tensed up further, since it only fuelled his frustration, and forced the other man to walk faster. He felt Jack stumble behind him and loosened his grip as a wave of guilt shot through him. He stopped and turned towards Jack to see him staring at Ianto as if he had no idea who he was.

_'What the hell is wrong with him?'_ he thought, the guilt disappearing as his aggravation grew.

Suddenly Jack scowled at Ianto and yanked his arm back. He turned away from Ianto and began walking back towards the living room. Ianto watched him, shock causing him to remain frozen where he stood. It was only as Jack picked up his coat that he was finally able to move. He stalked over to Jack and snatched the coat out of his hands, throwing it towards the corner. It hit the wall with a wet smack then fell to the floor.

Ianto was breathing heavily, anger nearly colouring his vision red. Without thinking what he was doing, he grabbed Jack and hauled their bodied flush together, their lips meeting in a harsh brutal kiss.

----------

From the moment Ianto had grabbed him, Jack's cock had become achingly hard. He had no idea what was going to happen between him and Ianto but whatever it was, he didn't care. He wanted the young man, almost more than he'd ever wanted anything else in his entire life.

_'Holy fucking hell! The only thing that would be better than this would be if the Doctor showed up and joined in.'_ he thought a little maniacally, before suddenly shoving the idea from his mind.

Jack growled into Ianto's mouth, his hands coming up and grasping Ianto's hair tightly as he thrust his tongue into the young man's mouth. Ianto pressed against him, pushing him backwards until his shoulders hit the wall heavily. He groaned and pulled out of the kiss, arching his head, barely noticing when it hit the surface behind him with enough force to leave a small dent in the plaster. Ianto attacked his neck, biting and laving along his jaw, and he knew that there would love bites peppering his skin the next morning, but he couldn't find it in him to care about what anyone would think.

He thrust his hips forward into Ianto's, their hard cocks pressing deliciously against one another through the fabric of their trousers. He groaned loudly as Ianto lips travelled up his jaw, his teeth sliding over the rain soaked skin before sucking it into the wet cavern of his mouth. His hips thrust forward again, his eyelids slamming shut as he gripped the short strands of Ianto's hair even tighter between his fingers.

"Ianto" Jack moaned heavily as the young man curved one of his arms around Jack.

Ianto moved one hand, grasping Jack's arse at the same time that the other one released his hip, worked its way between their tightly pressed bodies, and swiftly undid his trousers. He felt Ianto reach in and grasp his erection, curling his fingers around the hard flesh and pumping it in his fist. Jack gasped and pulled Ianto's mouth away from his neck, before capturing the young man's lips in another rough and brutal kiss.

Jack released Ianto's hair and ran his hand down the young man's chest until he reached the waistband of Ianto's trousers. He was having a hard time concentrating on anything, but he knew that he **_needed_** to feel Ianto's rigid cock in his own hand. He had to have them come at the same time, even if it meant he'd have to hold out. He undid the catch and quickly thrust his hand under the fabric, wrapping his fingers tightly around the turgid erection he encountered.

Ianto moaned into his lips, his tongue wrapping around Jack's. Jack tasted a hint of coffee mixed with Ianto's own essence and suckled against Ianto's mouth, trying to get more of the unique flavour into his mouth. He moved his thumb over the head of Ianto's cock, rubbing in the moisture leaking from the tip as his hand twisted with each downward stroke. He felt Ianto echo the movement against his own erection, causing his hips to thrust heavily into the young man's hand.

He felt Ianto squeeze his arse, his fingers tensing then releasing the hard muscle as his nails dug into him through the fabric of his trousers and he knew that Ianto was close. He deepened their kiss, his hand dropping down, his fingers trailing along the outer edge of Ianto's ear before running along the skin below. Just as he felt his own body spiralling out of control, Ianto shuddered against him and came, the warm sticky liquid coating Jacks hand.

Jack groaned, sharp spirals of pleasure travelling through his body and centring on Ianto's hand moving over his cock. His own release came fast and merciless as he spilled his essence into Ianto's pumping fist, coating the inside of his trousers. They were both still breathing harshly when Ianto collapsed against him. His own body was too weak from exertion and he barely had enough time to shift his frame before he landed on the floor with Ianto on top of him.

Wrapping his arms around the young man, he closed his eyes and tried to focus on calming down. He knew that Ianto was going to want to talk to him, but at the moment, there was no way in hell he'd be able to concentrate enough to have anything closely resembling a rational conversation. Even if he tried, the most he'd be able to come up with would be an insensible babble. As Ianto shifted against him, he opened his eyelids to find the young man looking at him with a stunned expression covering his features.

"You're still here."

Jack nodded, knowing it wasn't really a question, but figuring that Ianto needed an answer anyway. After all the times he'd disappeared, it seemed like the least he could do.

Ianto smiled sedately down at him, his eyes alight with pleasure and satisfaction. He rested his head against Jack's neck and snuggled up closer as his arms wrapped around Jack the best they could with him lying against the floor. He heard Ianto take a deep breath before releasing it, with a whispered word against his skin.

"Good."

Jack smiled at the obvious pleasure in Ianto's voice, but quickly lost it with the next sentence out of Ianto's mouth.

"We can talk and you can apologise to me."

----------

TBC

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_AN: Well, is it what you expected?  
_


	21. Chapter 21 Apologies and Aftermaths

_AN:__ Okay, this chapter is pretty long. But I lost internet connection most of this week so it kind of snowballed out of control. Do not get used to this...lol. Of course, if it was normal I would have split this into a good 2 or even 3 chapters. :D_

_Thanks to mama rocks for her awesome beta on this chapter as well as for the speed she finished at! For a long chapter she flew right through it! Also, her suggestions are priceless and really help this story along! :D_

_Also, thanks to silvercat63 for being my sounding board when I needed to bounce ideas!_

* * *

Chapter 21 - Apologies and Aftermaths

Ianto groaned aloud the moment Jack tensed up beneath him. Obviously Jack had no intention of talking or apologising to him which meant he'd just made one of the biggest mistakes of his life. He'd assumed that Jack was there because he felt something, even if it was infinitesimal, so he'd had no qualms about momentarily losing control. After all, Jack had practically been stalking him on a nightly basis, otherwise he couldn't figure out why the man would have bothered.

_'What a bloody fool I am!'_ He thought angrily as he tried to pull away. _'When am I ever going to fucking learn that Jack only cares about what his dick wants? I'm going to go completely daft if I keep letting him do this to me.'_

Jack's arms tightened around him, not allowing him to move and he suddenly lost what little patience he had left. He clenched his teeth, drawing his breath in a hiss between them as he pulled his head away from Jack's neck and glared down at him. His eyes narrowed in suspicion when he saw a cocky grin on Jack's face, the sight of it causing him to struggle harder. He felt Jack tighten his grip even further as he strained to hold onto him. Ianto growled deep in his throat and finally allowed his aggravation to overcome him.

"Bloody hell Jack! If you were looking to shag, you should have just gone out and picked up some idiot in a pub, instead of harassing me." he snapped in a low voice as he gave Jack a defiant stare.

"I wish you'd make up your fucking mind! Either you care about me, or you don't. Whatever the hell you finally decide, you better hope I'm still open to it when you figure it out!"

Jack's grin disappeared faster then he'd ever thought possible. Ianto was too livid to care. Instead he just pushed harder against Jack's chest, his fingers pressing viciously enough to bruise. He felt Jack's hands grasp each other behind his back, locking Ianto's body securely against his.

"Christ Ianto!" Jack shouted with frustration coating his voice.

"Would you please just stop for one God damn minute and let me explain!"

Ianto _**did**_ stop struggling, but it was only because rage invaded every pore of his body. He stiffened against Jack as he closed his eyes and fought against the overwhelming urge to punch and kick his way out of the embrace. He was fairly certain that Jack wouldn't let him get away with doing anything like that again. Especially seeing as he no longer had the excuse of saving Lisa to explain it.

His eyelids flew back open in shock when Jack suddenly spoke in a low and pleading tone.

"Please Ianto. I can't change what's already happened and I'm sorry..."

His voice broke and Ianto felt all of the air leave his lungs in one great gasp when he saw glistening wetness around Jack's irises.

"I'm so fucking sorry. I'm tired of fighting with you. There's no way for me to promise that things won't get bad again, but please..."

Jack finally relaxed his grip and Ianto suddenly found he _**couldn't**_ move, his muscles were frozen in disbelief. Somewhere in the back of his mind, a part of him was exhilarated, but it was buried underneath the absolutely stunned element that was telling him Jack couldn't possibly be serious. He vaguely realised he was shaking slightly and that he was staring down at the look on Jack's face, unabashedly and openly confused. His heart thundered in his chest, his eyes open wide from the way that the older man was looking at him so pleadingly.

He saw Jack's eyes light with triumph as he recognised that Ianto was no longer struggling, that he was simply too dumbfounded to even try. Jack smiled and relaxed his arms from around Ianto's body, his fingers running softly and slowly up Ianto's back in a delicate caress. When Jack's hands reached Ianto's neck he ran them gently down until he was cupping Ianto's chin in his palms. He leaned forward and hesitantly pressed a tender kiss against Ianto's lips, brushing against them lightly with his own. Before Ianto had time to react to the kiss Jack pressed against him and rolled both their bodies over.

Abruptly, Jack stood up and offered his hands down to Ianto. Their fingers curled around each others, gripping tightly as he allowed Jack to pull him upright. As soon as he was standing he relaxed his grip and tried to pull his hands free of the other man's. Jack, however, appeared to have something else in mind. He curved their linked hands around his back and pressed as closely to Ianto as he could, before leaning forward and nuzzling his lips against Ianto's neck.

Ianto sighed heavily at the feeling of Jack's lips ghosting over his skin, his eyelids fluttering closed. He felt Jack's tongue run over his neck, before he moved up and softly breathed into Ianto's ear. He knew that Jack was trying to distract him, but for the life of him, he couldn't find the will to resist the other man's touches, especially when he was being gentler then he'd ever been before. Normally when it came to Jack it was about heat and unbridled lust, not slow caresses.

However, he also knew that if he continued the way Jack was leading him, they'd only end up following where the constant sexual tension always seemed to lead them. Above all, he knew that he _**couldn't**_ allow that to happen again. They _**needed**_ to talk, to make sure that Jack wasn't going to pull the same shite he'd been pulling for the past few months.

He pulled away from Jack reluctantly, his eyes opening and focusing on the way the older man was staring at him. He saw a brief moment of uncertainty reflected in Jack's eyes, but it quickly disappeared and was replaced with a grin that lit up his whole face. Ianto tilted his head, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion. There was something about the look in Jack's eyes that was unlike anything he'd ever seen before. It was certainly not something he'd been prepared for. There there was definitely a sparkle there, as well as a certain amount of an emotion Ianto could not quite place. If he didn't know any better, he would've sworn that Jack was almost looking at him with a hint of love.

Ianto shook his head lightly hoping that Jack wouldn't notice and took a step away from the other man, trying to free his hands at the same time. When Jack held them tightly, refusing to release his grip, Ianto rolled his eyes and worked the fingers of his left hand loose. He reached up and cupped Jack's cheek in his palm.

"Jack I need to pick up your coat. I cannot just leave it sitting on the floor all night. As it stands, I'll probably have to bring it in to get dry-cleaned before you can wear it again." He said in low almost soothing voice.

Jack grinned sheepishly at him and released his other hand in a hurried gesture. However, he didn't allow Ianto to gather his greatcoat. Instead he swooped down and picked up, then shook it out roughly, spattering water drops all over the carpet and walls. Ianto flinched as he heard the liquid splash around and realised that water had even managed to hit his bookshelf and sprinkle across the bindings of several books. He grumbled in exasperation as he reached over and snagged the coat out of Jack's hands. If he let the other man continue what he was doing, he was going to end up covering the whole bloody loft in water spots. He wasn't about to try to get those out of the walls. The paint on them was already so cheap that it practically soaked up dust and dirt all on its own.

Jack tilted his head down and looked at Ianto through his eyelashes with a contrite expression on his face. As Ianto walked towards the closet near the entrance of his loft he heard Jack's voice whisper just loud enough for him to hear it.

"Sorry."

Ianto sighed as he pulled out a hanger and arranged the coat on it. He looked around trying to find the best place to put it so that it could air out and hopefully dry without getting mouldy. Just as he was about to walk into the kitchen he felt Jack's arms wrap around his waist, one of his hands dipped under the jumper that Ianto was wearing and slid over the skin of his stomach.

"I really am sorry Ianto." Jack whispered in a low voice as his lips brushed softly over the back of Ianto's neck.

Ianto turned around, holding the hanger away from them and raised his eyebrow.

"You can stop saying that now Sir."

Jack sighed as he closed his eyes.

"No, I don't think I can. After what I've done to you, I'm not sure I'll ever be able to say it enough."

Ianto grasped Jack's hand in his and walked them both into the kitchen. He hung the hanger on the overhead light fixture and laid a towel beneath the coat so that it would catch the water still dripping from the fabric. As soon as he was certain it wasn't going to fall he turned around and seized Jack, pulling their bodies closely together. He moved until his back hit the counter and leaned against it heavily as he allowed Jack to settle further into his arms. Jack tried to lean forward to brush a kiss over his lips but Ianto pulled backwards and stared into his eyes. He knew that the best he could hope for would be that Jack actually listened to him, so what he said next, he tried to articulate with as steady a tone as possible.

"You don't need to keep apologising to me Jack. Once was enough, believe me. You are not the only one at fault here. After everything we've put each other through, I don't expect us to be contrite for the rest of our lives."

Ianto heard his voice crack, almost stuttering as he spoke and cleared his throat before he continued.

"Can we at least try to be honest with one another? Can't we just start over and both admit we were wrong on equally different aspects?"

-----------

Jack stared at Ianto, his head tilted slightly to the side in confusion. He felt as if he'd just been clubbed aside the head with a very large rubber mallet. If he didn't know any better, he could've sworn Ianto had just given him a subtle, yet decisive, ultimatum.

He focussed his eyes over Ianto's shoulder and stared at the wall as he tried to come up with an answer to Ianto's question. Despite how much he'd like to, he couldn't just let Ianto get away with what he had done when he'd hidden Lisa. What he had done to Ianto did not compare, he had disturbed the younger man's peace of mind, not risked his life. Ianto had put the whole team in danger.

However, Tosh had probably been right when she told him that the reason he was so hurt in the first place was because he had trusted Ianto and the young man had hurt him on a personal level. He had told Ianto he'd forgiven him, a mere two days after Lisa had died, but if he was honest with himself, forgiveness hadn't come on that quickly. He still occasionally lamented the appalling outcome of his own failure to notice Ianto's betrayal. If he agreed with Ianto's terms he knew he would actually have to let the whole thing go once and for all.

There was also the issue that he had been the first one to shoot Lisa. Ianto still hadn't even acknowledged or confronted him about it. Either he didn't want to admit it, or he was completely blocking it out. Either way, he was certain that the young man wasn't going to be able to accept whatever it was that they were starting until he actually recognised all parts of it.

Without saying a word he pulled away from Ianto. He ignored the brief flash of hurt reflected on the young man's face as he took his hand and led him towards the bedroom. If anything, it would at least give him a few more minutes to think about the choices he was given. The moment he reached the room he began to undress, dropping his clothes in a messy pile on the floor. As he was tugging his still damp undershirt over his head he felt Ianto's arms wrap around his waist stopping him from going any further.

_'W__hat the fuck did I do now?_' he thought with a hint of annoyance.

Ianto gripped him tightly in his arms as he heard the young man's voice whisper in his ear.

"Just because I lost control once, doesn't mean I will again. I can't let you continue until I know what your answer is."

He turned around abruptly, his arms wrapping around Ianto's waist as he pulled him in and grazed his lips across Ianto's. Without even realising it, he knew he'd already made a choice. He needed Ianto in his life. If he'd learned anything from the hell he'd gone through over the past three days it was that one single fact.

Jack ran his hands under Ianto's jumper, letting his fingers stroke over the soft skin stretched over hard muscle. He felt Ianto's abdomen tighten at the caress before relaxing into it. He stared into Ianto's questioning gaze, the blue-grey eyes causing his heart to skip a beat.

"I could use a shower. What about you?" he said as he started to tug the garment up Ianto's body and over his head.

"Jack..."

"For Christ's sake Ianto! Yes! Is that good enough for you? Now would you just get undressed already? I'm standing here in front of you, my trousers sticking rather uncomfortably to my crotch and nearly freezing my bum off because my clothes are still slightly damp. Would I be here if I didn't agree with you?" Jack said with more annoyance then he'd intended.

"Now, can we go and take a shower or do I have to drag you in there with all of your clothes still on?"

Ianto yanked away from Jack, anger radiating from the action and completely evident in the way his eyes narrowed. His back hit the edge of the bedroom door and slammed it shut. Jack sighed and stepped forward, effectively trapping the young man against the door. He placed his hands on the frame and leant in until their foreheads were pressed together.

"Ianto?" he said low, his eyes closing in contrite exasperation at himself.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to lose my temper. There are some things that can't be forgotten. Instead of letting them go, maybe we should try to build from them."

Jack heard Ianto sigh just before he felt arms wrap around his waist tentatively.

"Why are we even bothering Jack? How are we supposed to get past everything that's happened? Do you have any idea how confusing it is for me to look at you and realise that I'm actually attracted to you? How about the fact that we keep misinterpreting or assuming the wrong thing whenever one of says or does anything?"

Jack heard Ianto's voice break and he opened his eyelids as he released the doorframe, then grasped the young man's chin in his palms again. He gazed at Ianto's eyes, only mildly shocked to see unshed tears filling them. Ianto tried to turn his head, but Jack tightened his fingers, not allowing him to pull his face away.

"Ianto, we need to stop assuming that we both have a motive for everything we say or do. I don't expect you to know what's in my mind so I'll start by saying that I am here because you're becoming rather important to me. Now, just to clear things up..."

He released Ianto completely and took a step away from him, pulling out of the young man's arms.

"I'm not in love with you. I don't think you'd believe me even if I said I was and I don't want you to get the wrong idea. Whatever this is between us, even if it's just attraction, can still be something unique. There _**are**_ emotions involved. Is that something you think you can handle?"

He saw Ianto exhale deeply then step forward, his gaze never leaving Jack's face as he nodded almost imperceptibly. Jack smiled cockily as he reached forward and grabbed Ianto, drawing their lips together in a quick almost perfunctory kiss before stepping away and running his gaze slowly up and down Ianto's body in a near visual caress.

His voice was rough with emotion as he spoke in a low voice that barely resonated enough for Ianto to hear.

"Now, take off your clothes."

-----------

Ianto swallowed, his throat suddenly feeling very dry. Just the way Jack had told him to disrobe was enough to make all of his senses suddenly go completely haywire. His cock hardened imperceptibly fast, enough to cause sweat to break out over his forehead. Instead of following Jack's orders he held out his hand in invitation. He tried not to show how nervous he was suddenly feeling but the obvious shaking in his hand gave his otherwise calm demeanour away.

Jack looked at him questioningly for a moment before reaching out and intertwining their fingers. Ianto wanted to explain what he was thinking, but he knew if he attempted to talk he would have a hard time trying to find his voice. He grasped Jack's hand tightly in his own, then turned away and led Jack into the bathroom, his heart pounding heavily in his chest.

Even though the wristband had allowed for him to see Jack nude, he never really realised the implications of what that meant until he released the other man's hand and he started to take off the rest of his clothes. When Jack dropped his trousers onto the floor, Ianto felt warmth flood his cheeks. He turned away and slowly began to disrobe. Jack didn't say anything about his obvious embarrassment, but both it and his own arousal were quite evident.

Ianto heard the taps turn on in the shower behind him and hesitated as he started to release the catch fully on his own trousers. He knew Jack had already seen him nude many times, but the fact that they weren't in the middle of any type of sexual act made it feel completely different. His whole body began to shake slightly harder at the knowledge that Jack was probably watching him undress.

Suddenly, Ianto heard the sound of water being interrupted, as if someone had stepped into the shower. He turned around to see Jack standing under the flow of water with his head dropped forward, his eyes closed, and his hands resting in front of him on the wall. The sight of Jack so unabashedly putting himself on display was just enough to make Ianto smile as his nervousness abruptly disappeared. He gazed at him through the clear door whilst quickly divulging the rest of his clothes in an untidy heap next to Jack's, not even remotely caring about how wrinkled or messy they would become.

Jack turned around the moment he climbed in behind him, his eyes opening and a small smile flitting over his face. Ianto pressed his body close to Jack's allowing the hot water to flow over both of them as he pulled the older man's mouth to his own in a harsh almost brutal kiss. Their mouths sealed together and Ianto flicked his tongue out, tasting the unique flavour that seemed to be even more potent than the smell of Jack's pheromones. Their bodies slid together wetly causing his cock to harden even further. Ianto felt Jack's answering hardness thrust against his own and groaned as he propelled his hips forward.

Jack pulled away from him suddenly, and Ianto couldn't stop a moan of displeasure form escaping his lips. Jack grinned at him, his eyes sparkling wickedly as he reached for one of the bottles on the corner shelve.

"It's a shower Ianto." He heard Jack say with amusement coating his voice.

Ianto arched his eyebrow and pulled Jack away from the flow of water before sliding around him so that he was under it. He laughed as Jack rolled his eyes.

"What? It's too bloody cold standing there while you hog all the hot water. I'm just trying to teach you to share."

Jack poured some shampoo into his hands, chuckling as he reached up and began to massage the liquid into Ianto's hair. Ianto groaned and dropped his head forward allowing Jack to have easier access as he relaxed into the touch and let the aroma of his shampoo wash over him. He leaned forward, closing his eyes and rested his arms around Jack's torso, breathing in deeply when the smell of Jack's skin hit his senses as well. They stayed that way for a moment, Ianto allowing every touch and scent to invade his mind, until he was nearly lax against Jack.

He was so tranquil that he nearly jumped when Jack chuckled under his breath.

"Ianto is this shampoo coffee scented or am I just imagining it because I haven't had your coffee in so long?"

Ianto cracked open his eye and grinned at Jack with amusement.

"Well, yeah. You know how much I love my coffee."

Jack shook his head groaning lightly at the same time, then pushed Ianto backwards.

"And I thought you smelling like that or my craving coffee whenever I got around you was just because you spent so much time making it. Now, close your eyes and tilt your head back."

Ianto barely had enough time to do as Jack said before the water was running over his head and down his back. He only stayed that way for a few moments before Jack managed to flip their bodies around so that he was once again dominating the showerhead. The cold air hit his back and Ianto shivered for a second as Jack grabbed a cloth, pouring a generous amount of body wash onto it. Jack worked it into a lather then reached forward to run it slowly and softly over Ianto's body.

Ianto sighed, letting Jack move him around as he washed him. His erection had dissipated when he'd relaxed while Jack was washing his hair, but began to swell again in response to the feel of the cloth. Jack teased at his nipples, running over each one several times in a circular movement. Ianto felt his body flush, warming up perceptibly with every movement of Jack's hands over his skin.

Jack growled, the sound resonated from deep in his chest as he pulled Ianto forward, letting the water wash the soap away from his chest. Ianto began to laugh, the sound changing abruptly into a moan as Jack dropped the cloth and dipped his head, taking one of his nipples into his mouth. Jack suckled at the hard nub, his teeth gripping it lightly as his tongue flicked out several times. He released it and licked a path over to the other one, giving it the same treatment as the first.

Ianto cried out, his head arching back in pleasure as he reached up and grasped Jack's hair twining it tightly between his fingers. He closed his eyes and felt the sensations overtake his body, bright lights flashing behind his lids.

"Jack..." he moaned, the word escaping his mouth in a near yelp as he felt Jack bite down a little harder than he had previously.

Jack's mouth travelled up his body and he groaned as he felt their skin slide against one another's. He couldn't stand still any longer. His hands reached out to grasp Jack's body, running over every part that he could reach. He ran his hand down Jack's back, resting it on the upper curve of Jack's arse whilst pulling their groins tightly against one another and luxuriating in the feel of their hard cocks sliding together.

Jack captured his lips, his tongue thrusting roughly against Ianto's before he pulled away.

"Christ Ianto. I want to fuck you so God damn bad. I need to be inside of you."

Ianto felt his body freeze and almost groaned as Jack began to pull away from him. He held on tightly not allowing the other man to move as he stared at Jack with what he hoped was a pleading look.

"Not yet Jack. I'm...I'm not ready for that."

Jack relaxed back into his arms, his eyes full of understanding and Ianto felt the air catch in his lungs. After all of the arguing they had been through, he was terrified that Jack wouldn't understand.

"It's okay, I'm flexible." Jack said as his hands ran over Ianto's arse and around his thighs.

"I need you Ianto. God, just fuck me. I don't care."

Ianto felt Jack's hand wrap around his cock and he groaned as he began to pump it in his fist. He struggled to concentrate, knowing that there was something he needed to say, but with every slick pump of Jack's hand he found it harder to think. He opened his eyes, not able to remember the moment he'd closed them as he finally figured out what he was trying to get out.

"We don't have any..."

Ianto gasped as Jack suddenly twisted his hand down on his cock and ran his thumb over the head,

"oh fuck, Jack. We need lube."

Jack grinned, keeping his hand moving as he used the other one to pull one of Ianto's hands away from his own arse. He released it and picked up the shampoo bottle, pouring a liberal amount into his open palm. Ianto released Jack completely and worked the liquid into a lather as Jack turned away from him and leaned forward with his head pressed against the wall. Ianto stared as the water cascaded down Jack's lean body, sluicing its way over the muscles and hard planes.

'_I knew he was fucking __gorgeous, but bloody hell. Why did I never pay attention when we were in bed before?'_ He thought as he moved his hand down the same path as the water.

He ran his fingers over Jack's arse, parting the cheeks until he could see the crinkled opening between them. He heard Jack groan as his fingertip teased hesitantly over it, brushing the opening with soft strokes. Jack arched his back and groaned loudly as he tried to thrust into Ianto's tantalising touch.

"Christ Ianto..." Jack panted heavily against the wall, "you really are a fucking tease sometimes."

Ianto grinned wickedly, then sank his finger fully into Jack's body all the way down to his knuckle. He moaned as Jack's body gripped his finger tightly, wrapping around it. He didn't give Jack a chance to adjust to the invasion as he pulled back then thrust in again, adding another finger beside the first. He felt Jack shudder as he released a harsh moan that echoed throughout the shower. Ianto gasped suddenly at the sound, his cock throbbing as need filled him so heavily that he lost his breath.

He leaned forwards and began to kiss his way across Jack's back, his hand moving in and out of Jack's body, gaining speed with each thrust of his fingers. He pulled back out fully one more time and thrust into the tight warmth adding a third finger and twisting them at the same time. Jack jumped under his mouth, shuddering as his hands scrabbled against the wall of the shower. Ianto nearly laughed as Jack began to undulate against his fingers, almost as if he was trying to get him to speed up.

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Jack groaned again, his mind swirling as pleasure invaded his entire body. Every time that Ianto's fingers entered his body he brushed against his prostate. It was nearly enough to make him start jabbering with nonsensical words. He knew that Ianto had been uncertain earlier, but it was obvious the young man was quickly becoming a natural at having sex with him.

Ianto pulled his fingers out suddenly and he felt the heavy weight of the young man's body covering his back. Ianto's arm wrapped around his torso, his fingers tweaking Jack's nipples while his other stroked over his shoulders. Jack dropped one of his hands down and reached back to grab Ianto's erection, guiding it into his body. The thick cock pressed into him at a steady pace, stretching and sliding, making him moan with satisfaction.

Jack wanted to push back, to twist into each plunge, but there was a deeper more innate need to let Ianto take control. He felt a slight shiver of pleasure run through his body as Ianto pulled out, then thrust back into his body. He was moaning heavily, gasping for breath. Just as he was about to whimper Ianto rested completely against him and began to thrust shallowly in and out of his body, suddenly hitting his prostate with each press forward.

Jack moaned loudly and felt his body shudder as he squeezed down around Ianto's cock. He heard Ianto gasp and placed his palms flat against the wall, bracing himself, just as Ianto pulled back and thrust into him hard and fast. Ianto's hands moved up and gripped his shoulders, pulling him backwards as he sped up and began to pummel into him, each time dragging the glans of his cock over his sweet spot.

"God Ianto, yes! Just like that!" he hadn't meant to scream, but the moment he did, Ianto shuddered against him and sped up impossibly faster.

He heard the young man groaning behind him, the sound of their skin hitting wetly against one another's. In a moment of sheer clarity he realised the water was growing cold around them and had just enough presence of mind to reach down and twist the taps off. He gripped them firmly in his grasp as he finally gave in to the urge to thrust backwards.

He needed to come, more than anything. He could feel his body seizing up, so close to edge, but it wasn't nearly enough. He bucked and shuddered into each thrust, Ianto's breathy moans echoing closely near his ear. He wanted to grasp his cock in his hand but he couldn't seem to release one of the taps in order to do so.

He heard Ianto moan behind him, his body stuttering and his thrusts becoming uneven. Just as he was about to groan in frustration Ianto released one of his shoulders, curved his hand around Jack's waist and gripped his erection tightly in his fist. Ianto leant forwards and ran his tongue lightly over the outer edge of Jack's ear, and Jack couldn't take anymore. He thrust forward, his eyes clenching tightly shut as he moaned out his pleasure, coming all over Ianto's hand and the wall of the shower.

Ianto was still thrusting heavily into him. He released Jack's cock and grasped his hips tightly in his hands before burying himself deep into his body. He ground forward, trying to get even deeper as Jack felt the erection throb inside of him, just before the warm wetness coated his insides.

"Oh God Jack." Ianto cried out as he collapsed against Jack's back, panting heavily.

Jack just barely managed to hold them both up, allowing Ianto time to recover. After a few moments he felt Ianto withdraw from his body and he turned around, pulling the young man's lips to his own, kissing him deeply. Ianto moaned into his mouth, his body resting lax against Jack's.

Jack pulled back and grinned at Ianto before turning back to the taps and restarting the water. He washed himself and Ianto as quickly as possible in the lukewarm water before turning them back off and helping Ianto step out of the shower.

Ianto was completely out of it, his body clearly showing exhaustion, as Jack reached into a cupboard and pulled out a towel. He almost laughed with amusement when Ianto's legs gave way beneath him and he had to grip the counter.

"Did I wear you out Ianto?" he said as he began to dry the young man's body.

Ianto looked at him lazily, his eyelids half closed. He'd never seen the young man look so sedated or relaxed in the entire time he'd known him. Jack felt a thrill of pleasure run through him as he realised he had been the one to do that. He was nearly as exhausted as Ianto, but he knew he was hiding it a mite better than the young man.

"Aren't you supposed to be the one who gets worn out? You are older than me you know." Ianto said suddenly, his smile growing even wider.

"Really Ianto? Do you want to go another round?" Jack replied with a hint of sarcasm that was completely ruined by the smirk covering his lips.

Ianto took the towel out of his hands and began to dry off Jack's body as he chuckled knowingly towards him. Jack stared at him innocently, his eyes open wide at the sound of Ianto's laughter. It had been so long since he'd heard anything sound so remotely honest as that chuckle come from Ianto. Inwardly, he made a sudden vow to try to get Ianto to laugh like that more often.

"Nice try, but you're tired. I can see it in your eyes. Can we go to bed now?" Ianto said as he dropped the damp towel next to their wrinkled clothing on the floor.

Jack laughed, grasping Ianto's hands and pulled him towards the bedroom. Ianto was just about to climb into the bed completely nude when Jack cleared his throat and stopped him from going any further. Ianto turned towards him, his eyebrow raised in question to see Jack holding out the cotton pyjama bottoms that he'd tossed towards him earlier.

"Really Jack? Why?" He said, his head tilted slightly, his eyes showing a hint of confusion.

Jack tossed them to him and walked over to the wardrobe, getting out another pair of pyjama bottoms and yanked them over his body. He turned to see Ianto had pulled on the other pair and walked over to the young man kissing him gently before answering his question.

"Because Ianto, the next time you see me nude, I'll be fucking you. I'll push my cock so far into your body that, you'll forget who you are, where you are, and probably your own damn name."

Jack grinned at him wickedly, his eyes sparkling with insinuation as his voice dropped to a low growl.

"Above all, you'll be begging me to do it. I promise you that."

He couldn't stop a wicked chuckle from escaping as Ianto's mouth dropped open in shock. He saw the young man's eyes grow wide at his words, his breathing suddenly shallow and harsh. It seemed to take a minute or two before he was able to focus enough to shake his head in astonishment. He turned away from Jack and slid smoothly into the bed. Jack climbed in next to him a little unsure at whether or not Ianto still wanted him there. He'd expected some kind of snarky response but the young man still had yet to say anything.

His uncertainty disappeared when Ianto curled around him, his head resting on Jack's chest. Jack felt his heart speed up as Ianto sighed and relaxed further into him, his ear pressed flush against it. He tried to fight against the exhaustion that was invading his mind, but three days with hardly any sleep were definitely catching up to him. Just as he was about to drift off he heard Ianto mutter something against his chest. It took him a few moments to figure out what the young man said, but as soon as he did he felt another low laugh rumble from his lungs.

"You're going to have to try a lot harder, Sir. Seduction only works for so much, and I'm not normally the begging type."

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TBC

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_AN: So, reviews are highly appreciated if you're willing to take the time! Hope the chapter was worth the wait! :D_


	22. Chapter 22 Taking Chances

_AN: Sorry for such a long time between the last update! I managed to mess up my back and was on bed rest for a week and a half. Unfortunately this chapter wasn't nearly as long as I wanted but it's not bad for being highly medicated...lol. Also there were a few people I didn't get to thank for your feedback on the last chapter and I'm sorry about that. I promise now that I'm doing better I'll start responding again! :D_

_Thanks to mama rocks for her awesome beta on this chapter! It wouldn't have been nearly as good without her suggestions! :D_

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Chapter 22 - Taking Chances

Ianto growled as he stood up from his couch. He was so bloody tired of sitting in his loft and staring at the telly. All of the programmes were so fucking unintelligent and useless. He couldn't even watch the news half the time without laughing at their inane explanations for things that they obviously knew nothing about. Sometimes the ways they came up with to explain alien involvement made him roll his eyes at how positively daft people could actually be. It reminded him of how often Jack stated that people always said the same shtick when they found out aliens were real, even when it's been shoved in their faces for years.

He stalked over to his bookshelves and turned away without reading any of the titles. He also ignored the diary sitting on his coffee table. After being stuck at home for almost an entire month, he'd read nearly every book he owned. He'd also made countless entries into his diary, so there was no point in even bothering picking it up. At this point the most he'd be able to write would be something along the lines of -_ Nothing fucking happened today either._

Ianto paced back and forth in his living room, his hands clenched at his sides. He was allowed to return to work tomorrow, but he wasn't sure he was going to be able to keep his sanity for another twenty four hours. Besides the fact that he had nothing to do, there was also the issue that he hadn't heard from Jack since he'd fallen asleep next to him.

He stopped pacing suddenly, his eyes staring blankly at the wall. If he was going to be honest with himself, he knew that's what was really bothering him. Two mornings ago, he'd woken up alone in his bed with only the scent of Jack on his sheets to let him know he hadn't dreamt the whole damn night. Well, that and the fact that his hair had been sticking up in fifteen different directions, which was why he _**never**_ took a shower right before he went to bed in the first place.

Ianto groaned and turned towards his bedroom. There was absolutely no way he was going to be able to fall asleep, his mind was too active, but at least he could try to lie down. As soon as he walked through the door he went to the wardrobe and started looking through his suits. He rolled his eyes as he realised this had been his intention the moment he decided to go to the bedroom. He was going to go to the Hub and do something...anything. He didn't care, as long as he didn't have to sit in his loft surrounded by same boring walls he'd been staring at for nearly a month. He had barely slept in two days and he was going batty just sitting around doing nothing. At least if he went into work he could try to forget about everything that was frustrating him.

'_It's only one __bloody day. Not even that! Technically it's only a few hours.'_ He thought irritably as he took out a suit and hung it up on the back of the bedroom door.

He was yanking off his pyjama bottoms when a wave of uncertainty stole over him. The only problem was if Jack was there, he'd probably send him back home. Even if the team defied him whenever they could, he was still the boss. Ianto showing up when he wasn't supposed to be there could make Jack angry enough to tell him to take another month off.

Shaking his head Ianto continued getting dressed. There was no guarantee that Jack would be there. It was late and the Hub would probably be empty. Barring some type of rift emergency, he could take the chance and not worry unless it actually happened.

'_After all, it's not like he lives in the bloody Hub!'_

Ianto froze, his shirt hanging open from his shoulders. The thought flickered though his mind again, this time a little slower and clearer. It was obviously something he'd never paid close enough attention to. If he was completely honest with himself, it was highly likely that Jack _**did**_ live in the Hub. He was always the first one in and the last one to leave. He was also the first one to arrive whenever they got called in for any reason. In fact, Jack was normally the one to send out the messages or call them in the middle of the night. Now that he'd thought of it, the idea that Jack would be living anywhere else seemed remotely absurd.

He furrowed his eyebrows as he slowly began to button up his shirt. If this revelation was correct then it was highly plausible that Jack _**would**_ be there if he went into work. He buttoned up his waistcoat and pulled on his suit jacket without even bothering to acknowledge what that could mean. He wasn't about to start doubting his decision. He'd made up his mind and fully intended to see it through. Grabbing his keys he walked towards his front door with a determined set in his stride.

He stifled a yawn as he locked the door behind him, the action barely registering as anything remotely noteworthy. Instead the only thing he focussed on was what he would actually say to Jack if he happened to be at the Hub. He couldn't figure out what a person would normally say if they've casually walked into someone's home in the middle of the night. Most likely, the person who did so would get shot or arrested for breaking into the place. And heaven forbid that they be caught sneaking into a bedroom, that would cause them to be labelled as a sexual predator.

'_Though, knowing Jack's sexual proclivity, he'd probably just grin __cockily and invite them to join him between the fucking sheets.' _he thought with a hint of sarcasm as he walked out of the building and the cool night air sent shivers down his spine.

Ianto climbed into his car, relaxed back into the seat, and smiled as he drove towards the Millennium Centre. He hummed along with the radio whenever a song came on that was actually one he knew. Working for Torchwood guaranteed that he heard a lot of Glen Miller, but he rarely had a chance to sit down and listen to music he liked. He smiled again as he realised that Jack's taste in music wasn't all that bad, just remotely old fashioned. It made perfect sense for a man who spent his life dressing in WWII clothing.

As Ianto pulled into his normal parking space, he chuckled under his breath. He could feel a streak of excitement running through his body. He wanted to see Jack, and there was a good possibility that he would get what he wanted.

'_Of course, he could be out weevil hunting. There's no way to know until you actually go inside you daft fool.__ Besides he might send you home when he sees you, remember?'_

Ianto ignored the thought and climbed out of his car, walking towards the entrance with more determination then he felt. The unsurety of his attitude was really starting to get to him and he wasn't certain that he was thinking too clearly. After all, in the two days since he'd last seen Jack, he'd hardly slept. Every time he'd closed his eyes, he was either bombarded with images of Lisa, or visions of Jack standing in the shower. He'd spent the past forty-eight hours in a state of perpetual grief and lust. The whole thing had made him too aware of just how truly messed up he really was.

As he entered the Hub, his heart thundered in his chest. A thrill of anticipation sent a shiver down his spine. He was taking an incredible risk and only now realised that it was the thought of seeing Jack that had dragged him out of his loft. It hadn't been that he was bored or that he was tired of sitting around. It was all about Jack, just as everything seemed to be for the past few months.

The moment the cog door rolled open he felt his heart and mood drop. The night he had previously visited Jack, everything had still been on. Now the place was darker then he'd ever seen before. It was also completely empty. Even Tosh's computer screens, never turned off, were barely enough to put a dent into the shadows surrounding the area. Jack's office, normally lit by at least one lamp, was pitch-black.

Sighing Ianto walked up the stairs and glanced around. Even though Jack wasn't there, he knew it had been a good idea to come in. If he'd come back to work tomorrow and seen the place as it was now, he'd have been hard pressed not to snap at nearly everyone and tell them they needed to learn to bloody clean up after themselves. After everything that had happened when he'd left, he wasn't quite sure he'd be able to get away with doing that.

From what he could see, the entire main area looked like a tornado had run through it. The coffee table had over a dozen pizza boxes sitting on it. There were stacks of crumpled napkins and a few empty beer bottles sitting next to them. Owen's station was covered with empty paper coffee cups as well as tons of paperwork that obviously needed to be filed. Tosh's station wasn't nearly as bad, but it still wasn't all that neat. She had pieces of alien tech everywhere around her computers and a mountain of empty folders sitting on the edge of the desk. He was astonished that it hadn't all fallen over yet.

Ironically enough, only Gwen's station was remotely neat. Sure she had a few things that needed to be thrown away or archived, but for the most part it looked organised. Of course, her trash bin was overflowing. He shuddered as he imagined what Jack's desk might look like, or how much of a mess the conference room was probably in.

Groaning, Ianto walked up to where his coffee machine was. He was going to need a few extra shots of caffeine if he was going to make the place presentable again by morning. He nearly laughed when he saw a sign taped to the top of it with Jack's handwriting stating that no-one was to touch it until Ianto came back. He pulled it off, at the same time noticing how clean the area looked. The only remote difference from when he left was a thin patina of dust.

'_At least it's only dust. I could've come back to find the whole bloody thing in pieces.'_ He thought as he began to gather up the mugs so he could wash them and clean off everything else.

Ianto finished making himself a cappuccino and sipped it as he moved around the Hub, cleaning up as he went. Thoughts of Lisa filled his mind, the darkness being a little too reminiscent of when she had started to take over. Without thinking about what he was doing he walked around and turned on several of the lamps. He hesitated a moment before flicking the switch for Jack's office, but after a moment turned that on as well. From what he could tell, Jack was nowhere to be seen. Either he'd been wrong about Jack living in the Hub, or the man's bedroom was hidden somewhere else.

When he reached Owen's workstation his hand brushed against one of the keyboards. An image came up on screen and he froze as he studied it his head tilting in confusion. The computer wasn't displaying anything odd, but he knew that there was something strange in what he was seeing. He printed out several sheets of information and walked towards the printer to pick them up, grabbing an empty folder off Tosh's desk as he walked by.

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When Jack woke up he was gasping from the images of his nightmare. He hated it when memories of his past invaded his mind. Whenever it happened he always felt compelled to wonder if the visions were real or just a product of his warped mind. This dream though, had been a real and much more recent memory. Of that he was absolutely certain. He still remembered what it had felt like the moment the train pulled out of the tunnel and how every man he was responsible for had died so swiftly.

Jack groaned lightly and rolled out of bed. He sighed while sitting on the edge of it, the sheet tangled around his legs, his hands covering his face as he hunched over. There was no point in even trying to go back to sleep. After the many jokes he made about not sleeping, it was only times like these that he actually didn't get at least five or six hours. However, when he had dreams like those, his mind tended to keep running for the rest of the night. Normally the only way he could get it to calm down would be to go out and find someone to fuck until he couldn't see straight. Unfortunately, right now his choices were too limited. He could go find some random shag and risk losing whatever he had going with Ianto, he could try to work off the excess energy now streaming through him, or he could go over to Ianto's and climb into bed with him.

As tempting as the idea of running to Ianto and letting him drive away the dreams was, the action was too needy, even for him. He didn't want to take the chance that Ianto would get the wrong idea. If he just waited one more day, then he could play some more. It was much easier if he didn't spend an inordinate amount of time with the young man. Keeping the situation separate from his heart was a much better idea. He was already in deeper then he'd ever intended. If he wanted to keep Ianto from hurting when he left, he had to remain detached on some level.

Now if only Ianto would understand that he was just trying to protect him, things would actually be a lot easier.

A small fluttering noise reached his ears and Jack suddenly sat up straight, his hands gripping the edge of the bed, his eyes flicking around hurriedly. The room was completely empty. Hell, he was fairly certain the whole Hub was empty. Either the residual emotions from the dream were making his mind hear things, or those fucking fairies were actually screwing with him.

He was so immersed in trying to figure out where the sound was coming from that it took him a moment to realise that the lights were on in his office. Moving as swiftly as he could, he grabbed his clothes and put them on, then climbed up the ladder. As he walked over to his desk, he blew out a breath of air, relief flowing through him. He glanced down to see a rose petal sitting on his desk and felt a shiver of fear run down his spine.

Just as he picked up the petal there was a noise from behind him. He turned to see Ianto standing in front of him. He knew he should've been shocked, but instead he felt relief. Despite the fact that the young man wasn't supposed to be there, he knew he could use it to his advantage.

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TBC (Smut up next...)

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_AN: So I actually have the next few chapters written out in longhand. Just gotta type them up. :D_

_Feedback highly appreciated!!!_


	23. Chapter 23 Assumptions through the Nig

_AN:__ First, don't kill me for how I had to leave this off. I realised that if I kept adding more to this chapter it was going to end up being 17-18 pages long, and I don't want to inundate my wonderful Beta like that. So honestly, this was the best place. I promise I am almost done with the next chapter. :D_

_Thanks to mama rocks for her quick beta job! She's absolutely essential now! :D And thanks to Silvercat63 for listening to me whinging over the weekend cause the boys were misbehaving and didn't want to do as I told them to in this story. :D_

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Chapter 23 - Assumptions Through The Night

"You shouldn't be here."

Ianto jumped slightly and slammed the folder shut in his hands as his eyes flew towards Jack. For some strange reason, Jack was looking at him with an expression he'd never seen before. If he didn't know any better he would've sworn the older man was trying to overwhelm him just with his presence. The problem was, for the briefest moment Ianto _**did**_ have to fight against the urge to turn around and run out of the Hub. He just barely managed to stifle it.

"Neither should you."

Ianto stood there for a few seconds longer, his eyes locked with Jack's. Finally he couldn't take it anymore. If he didn't move away he was going to walk forward and push the other man against the desk and snog him senseless. Jack looked way too fucking luscious while standing there appearing completely sleep rumpled. He turned away and fled quickly back to Owen's workstation.

He tried not to notice Jack following him, but there was no way he was able to ignore the man after his hand landed on Ianto's shoulder. He twisted around feeling his self control snap slightly as he let his eyes run quickly over Jack's body. The moment he saw a bulge in Jack's trousers he snapped his attention back to the computer in front of him and drew in a deep breath, tasting and smelling the other mans scent as it exploded throughout his mouth and made its way down his throat. His mouth began to water as images flashed through his mind of what he could do to Jack and what sounds he could draw from the other man while he was doing them.

'_Bloody hell, why does he have to look __**and**__ smell so fucking good?' _

Ianto struggled, the inner turmoil beginning to wear at his defences. More than anything he wanted to grab Jack and pull their bodies close together. He wanted to shove his quickly hardening cock against the other man and moan when he captured Jack's lips in a brutal kiss. He would kiss Jack so fucking hard and insistently that the other man wouldn't know what hit him.

By some means, he wasn't sure how, he managed to keep his calm demeanour. It was quickly becoming harder and harder not to give in to his desires. He sucked in another gasp of air and released it with a deep sigh, instantly regretting the action. His body tingled even more, the taste exploding throughout his senses again, his heart beginning to pound in his chest. He was dealing with just enough of those heady pheromones and fighting his lust for a sexy as hell captain. He wanted to press backwards against Jack just to feel the warmth of the other man's body through his clothes.

He sat up straight feeling Jack's hand slip from his shoulder and run down his back in a soft caress until it stayed resting just above his arse. His mind was so muddled that it literally took him a second to realise that Jack had asked him a question. He twisted back towards the other man, this time forcing his eyes to remain on Jack's face as he answered him.

"Funny sorta weather patterns."

Jack's expression changed to one of apprehension and, if Ianto didn't know any better, a slight magnitude of fear. He felt a chill run through him as he focussed back on the computer. The idea of Jack being afraid of _**anything**_ made his blood run cold.

'_But why would Jack be afraid of the weather? What is so bloody special about that?'_

Just as he was about to comment he felt Jack press against his back, the heat from the other man's body soaking through and travelling throughout his body. Before he could stop himself, a groan escaped his chest as he tilted his head back, resting it against Jack's chest. Jack leant forward and nipped at the edge of his ear, then ran his tongue along it as he began to whisper.

"Christ Ianto, all I can smell is that fucking shampoo. Do you have any idea what you've done to me now? I can't even drink a cup of coffee without getting a God damn erection."

Ianto closed his eyes as Jack's arms wrapped around him. He felt Jack's hands cupping his cock through his trousers and his hips thrust upward, trying to increase the contact.

"Are you ready for me yet Ianto?" Jack asked with a soft voice, the breath ghosting into his ear.

Ianto opened his eyes as he reached down and grasped one of Jack hands in his own. Yanking him forward, he made sure that Jack was nestled between his open thighs as he drew the other man's lips to his own. He would've laughed at the surprised expression on Jack's face if his mouth wasn't currently busy swallowing the moan that Jack emitted.

His hands curved around Jack's body, grabbing his arse and pulling him closer until their erections pressed together. The feeling was almost painful through the fabric of their clothing, but it also felt too bloody good to stop. He repeated the movement again, biting down and sucking on Jack's lower lip. Jack grasped his neck and titled his head to the side, thrusting his tongue into Ianto's mouth. Ianto groaned as a sharp spasm of arousal travelled throughout his entire body, his cock throbbing against the zip of his trousers. Pulling away from the other man's lips, he attacked Jack's neck, sucking and nibbling on every bit of flesh he came into contact with.

Jack arched his head backwards, his hands suddenly gripping Ianto's shoulders tightly. He was so intent on what he was doing that it took Ianto a few seconds to realise that Jack was actually speaking to him. Every time Ianto's teeth bit down on his neck and their cocks rubbed together, Jack's words would become garbled and almost unintelligible.

"Ianto...Iuh...when did...yoh God!"

He continued what he was doing, not caring about what Jack was trying to say. It didn't matter, the only thing that he cared about was the feel of the older man's body as it rubbed against his own. Suddenly Jack's hand moved to his hair, grasping it tightly as he yanked Ianto's mouth from his neck. He started to pull away, but Ianto felt the movement and gripped his arse tighter in his hands. He wasn't about to let Jack take control over what was going on. Even if the older man started this, he was going to make damn sure that he continued it on his terms.

"What the hell Ianto? You need to answer my question!"

Ianto felt his patience snap. He stood up and pressed Jack back against the desk, his hands running around the front of Jack's trousers, undoing them quickly. As soon as he had them open, he reached in and wrapped his fingers around the throbbing hardness that was encased within.

"Why Sir? Do you honestly believe that I'm going to just let you fuck me tonight?"

He ran his hand up and down Jack's cock, gripping it tightly and swiping his fingers over the tip. Jack groaned, his own hands dropping down to grip at Ianto's arm as it moved between them.

"I thought I was supposed to beg for it. Am I begging?"

Jack groaned again, his hips rocking forward with every downward stoke of Ianto's fingers. Ianto pushed his other hand into Jack's trousers and rolled his balls between his fingers as he kept stroking his cock with the first. Despite the fact that the trousers were becoming incredibly tight around his wrists, he still managed to press a finger behind the sac, running it over Jack's perineum. He felt Jack's body freeze for a moment before thrusting hard into Ianto's palm, a harsh groan ripping from his throat.

Ianto felt Jack take a deep breath of air, as if he were trying to find some semblance of control. He stopped thrusting into Ianto's hand and pushed the young man away from him. Ianto released his grip, confusion running through his mind, as his hands came out of Jack's trousers and dropped away.

"What the fucking hell?" Jack said with a hint of irritation coating his voice.

The tone in Jack's voice shocked him immeasurably. He saw Jack look at him angrily for a moment, then shake his head slightly as if trying to clear it. He tried not to whimper, but it slipped out when he saw Jack's expression abruptly turn darker than he'd ever seen it before. He hadn't even looked that angry when he'd told Ianto he needed to kill Lisa.

'_There's a hint of something else too. Can't you see it?'_

He tilted his head, trying to distinguish what it was that was different from the last time. Without realising what he was doing, Ianto took a small step away from Jack, his heart thundering in his chest. He really wanted to continue what they were doing, but he'd obviously done something wrong. It was the only thing he could think of that would make Jack that pissed off.

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'_Why the hell am I so fucking stupid? I've been sitting here, actually telling myself __**not**__ to go out and fuck someone because it might ruin what I've started with him, and he's been out fucking around himself! I should've known something was up the last time we had sex.'_

Jack shook his head again, then growled as he saw Ianto take a step away from him. He couldn't stop his eyes from narrowing as he stared at the young man's face. Even though he was way too fucking turned on, a streak of jealousy was running throughout him. He'd hadn't thought about it when they were in the shower together, but now that he was focussing on it, Ianto had known just a little too much then as well. The only way he could have gotten so knowledgeable about some of the moves he'd pulled, would be if he'd been with another man. Maybe if he'd gotten a little more rest, or if he wasn't still so unsettled from his nightmare, he might have been able to ignore his thoughts, but his mind was still too muddled from that lack of sleep and the arousal still shooting through him.

"Where the fuck did you learn that from. It wasn't from me, that's for sure!"

The words slipped out before he could stop them, as he hastily glanced down whilst buttoning and zipping up his trousers. He had no idea why the thought of Ianto having sex with someone else angered him so much. After all, he himself flirted with everyone on the fucking planet, and more than a few from other planets. He knew he had absolutely no right, but for some strange reason he couldn't stop. It was almost as if something was making him talk without thinking.

'_It's not like you're in a fucking relationship Jack! This is based on your terms remember?'_

Jack glanced back at Ianto to find the young man looking at him with shock clearly written all over him. His body was completely tense, his grey-blue eyes open wide and staring with a hard edge into Jack's. Suddenly Ianto took a step forward and smacked Jack hard across the face. The move was so unexpected and so unlike Ianto that Jack nearly fell backwards on his arse in shock.

'_At least he didn't punch me this time! How fucking stupid do I have to be?'_

He blinked as he saw a blush start to creep up Ianto's neck, covering his cheeks, something he'd never actually seen the young man do before. Jack sighed, his hand coming up to rub at his face as he groaned aloud in frustration. It only took a split second for him to realise just how badly he had screwed up. Ianto wasn't exactly the wandering type and he certainly didn't go out looking for other guys to screw around with. As far as Jack knew, Ianto hadn't even been attracted to another man until he'd come along.

He was actually bewildered that Ianto hadn't stormed out of the Hub as soon as he'd slapped him. He was even more shocked when Ianto spoke softly and with a hint of embarrassment. However, nothing could've prepared him for what Ianto actually said.

"I, um...after, I...after that first time with that bloody wristband, once I realised what was going on, I went online and looked up some things. I was just trying to find out..."

His voice trailed away as he closed his eyes and dropped his head, avoiding Jack's gaze.

"I wanted to know how to get some of the same reactions from you that you get from me so easily."

Jack took a step forward and reached up to run his palm across Ianto's cheek, pulling his face back up so he could look at him. He felt a shudder run through him as Ianto winced just before he relaxed into the touch. He saw Ianto's eyelids flutter open, and he stifled the urge to just kiss him and take up from when he'd first pulled away from the young man. Instead he smiled at him, aware of just how close he'd been to really fucking up everything he'd worked so hard for. After all the teasing and anticipation, he damn near lost all of the ground he'd laid so far.

'_You still might have.'_

Ignoring the thought, he leaned forward and brushed his lips softly over Ianto's. Relief flooded through him as he felt Ianto's arms come up and embrace him tightly, pulling him closer until their bodies were flush against one another. He wrapped his own arms around Ianto, pulled out of the kiss, and leaned in so he could whisper in his ear.

"I'm sorry Ianto. What can I do to make it up to you?"

Ianto chuckled and Jack pulled away, tilting his head in bewilderment at the grin on the young man's face. After what had just happened, he certainly wasn't expecting Ianto to be laughing, especially when he was pretty much offering him anything he wanted.

"As much as I would love to stay and maybe continue what you started, I'm beginning to think that we both need to go back to bed and get some more sleep. We're obviously not exactly acting rationally."

Jack laughed lightly, his hand reaching around his own back to grasp at Ianto's. He entwined their fingers together, brought them forward and up to his lips, kissing the tips of each one softly. Dropping his other hand, he grasped Ianto's erection through his trousers, squeezing and releasing it a few times, as the young man groaned and tilted his hips into the touch.

"You may be right Ianto, but I don't think your body agrees. I do have an idea though." He said in a soft voice that was probably barely loud enough for Ianto to hear.

Letting go of everything but Ianto's hand, he turned and pulled him into his office, leading him towards his bedroom. Ianto gasped lightly behind him, but he didn't acknowledge it. He would've figured that Ianto knew he lived at the Hub, but didn't know where he slept. Apparently, from what he just heard, he'd surprised the young man. Turning back towards Ianto he nearly fell over when he saw a smirk flit over the young man's lips. Ianto raised his eyebrow, an expression Jack was beginning to know rather well.

"You mentioned a bed?"

Ianto reached out and pulled him forward, pressing his lips hard against Jack's. His body reacted immediately, the erection that had begun to soften whilst he was angry, swiftly came back making him groan. Ianto pressed forward, his tongue invading Jack's mouth as he swallowed the noise. Just as Jack was about to press him backwards towards his desk, Ianto pulled away and smiled knowingly at him.

"You know, I just realised tonight that you lived here, but I had no idea that you had a room under your bloody office. It's probably messy as hell, but now at least I know where it is so I can clean it."

Jack laughed and pushed at Ianto, indicating he needed to climb down first. As soon as Ianto reached the bottom he heard him take a small intake of breath. He quickly climbed down to see Ianto looking around in amazement.

"It's a lot cleaner than I thought it'd be. It's also larger than it looks from above, isn't it?"

He nodded his head at the question and pushed Ianto back towards the bed.

"Regardless of what you might think Ianto, I do know how to pick up after myself and others if the need arises."

Ianto's eyebrow rose again and Jack found himself fighting against the urge to laugh as he pushed the young man a little more vigorously. As soon as Ianto hit the edge he dropped down heavily onto the mattress. Jack reached forward to unbutton Ianto's suit jacket, his eyes silently asking for permission from the young man. Ianto didn't say a word to him, just slowly nodded his head in acquiescence. He quickly undid the buttons and slipped it from Ianto's shoulders, placing it carefully on the end of the bed. As soon as he reached forward to undo the waistcoat Ianto's hands came up to intercept him. He glanced down at the young man in confusion.

"You first Sir." he heard Ianto say in a low voice.

"Not yet Ianto, not until we're at least on equal terms."

He heard a soft groan come from the young man's lips at his words and he leaned forward until he could whisper into Ianto's ear.

"And that means you need to stop calling me Sir. As kinky as that can be sometimes, I like it better when you're moaning my name. Think I can make you moan it again tonight?"

Ianto's breathing sped up rapidly as he spoke, making Jack nearly laugh at the idea that he could affect the young man with just a few simple words.

Jack smirked at him, pulled his hands free, and reached forward to continue unbuttoning Ianto's clothes. Working as fast as he could, he swiftly divested the young man of his waistcoat and dress shirt, laying them with the jacket on the end of the bed. Without even hinting at what he was about to do, he opened his vortex manipulator and pressed a few buttons in rapid sequence. He saw Ianto's eyes open wide as the lights went out in the Hub above and around them, leaving only the light in the bedroom on.

Ianto glanced over at one of the walls, and Jack chuckled at the obvious shock written in his expression.

"Jack, you have a window that can see into the Hub! How the bloody hell is that possible? Why can't we see it from outside?"

Reaching forward, Jack ran his hands under Ianto's undershirt and pushed it up, exposing his chest. He placed his palm flat against one of Ianto's nipples and began to knead it, before pulling back and running around the tip with his finger. Hearing Ianto moan softly, he leaned forward as he tweaked the now hard nub between his thumb and finger, rolling it gently. His other hand came up and began to wander across Ianto's torso, mirroring the movement of the first.

"Do you really care about the fucking window Ianto? Is it that important?"

Ianto reached forward, gripped Jack's neck and pulled their mouths together in a rough wet kiss. Jack felt Ianto's tongue at his lips, forcing its way into his mouth and tangling with his own, suckling it tenderly at the same time. He groaned at the invasion, then yanked at Ianto's shirt, trying to get it over his head without breaking their kiss.

Ianto chuckled against Jack's mouth and pulled away from him, his eyes sparkling with desire in the near darkness. Jack gave into the urge to join him, then pulled his own shirt off before reaching over and pulling Ianto's undershirt over his head as well. As soon as he placed the garment on the end of the bed he pressed Ianto backwards and ran his finger down the young man's cheek, tracing his jaw line down to his throat. His other hand reached out and ran along Ianto's chest and shoulders, mapping out every bit of sensitive flesh he came into contact with. He ran his fingertip over Ianto's nipples, first flicking them, then soothing with a soft caress. Ianto groaned, his hips thrusting up into the air and Jack repeated the movement, a grin flitting across his face. He reached down, intending to pull Ianto's trousers off and was once again stopped by the young man as he reached out and grasped his hands.

"Jack, I want to...try something."

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Ianto had no idea why he'd stopped Jack. A large part of his mind kept telling him to go ahead and follow through with what Jack wanted from him. He knew he was definitely headed in that direction. But the logical part of his mind still kept resisting everything Jack was offering him. What was even worse was that he knew if Jack had just shagged him instead of comforting him that first night after Lisa died, he wouldn't have been so immersed in this internal debate. He would have just accepted it as a part of his new life and not thought twice about it.

Jack sat patiently on the edge of the bed looking down at him. He smiled up at him before pulling the older man's body towards his and lightly pressed their lips together. If he worked this right, he wouldn't have to worry about what Jack actually wanted from him tonight. He would just have to make sure he kept Jack so occupied that he wouldn't remember his request. He had a feeling that what he was about to say to Jack would distract him just enough.

Jack's body settled heavily on top of his and he bit the inside of his cheeks to hold in a groan as their cock's rubbed deliciously together through their trousers. Every time he got these feelings from dabbling around with Jack, he still revelled at how he'd never felt anything quite like them in his past sexual relationships. Before he could completely lose track of his thoughts, he rolled both their bodies over and settled heavily against the other man. Jack moaned into his mouth, a sound he swallowed as he thrust his tongue out, delving and caressing with sucking licking strokes. Jack kept up with the kiss his own tongue battling against Ianto's for dominance, each sweeping movement pressing their lips harder together.

Ianto pulled away and licked along Jack's jaw line, nipping at the soft smooth plains of his neck when he came to it. Jack groaned and arched his head back almost in offering, and he delved further, suckling ferociously. He found himself wanting to leave a mark, a love bite that would show there was some part of Jack that he owned, even if it was only the sexual side. He began to bite a little harder, drawing the skin deep into his mouth as his hands ran down Jack's chest, his short nails digging into the muscles they came into contact with.

"Yes, ahh...Ianto! Oh god...ungh...holy fucking hell!"

He nearly laughed, the sound turning into a moan of pleasure as Jack's hips suddenly thrust powerfully into his, a deep groan emitting from the older man's chest. Jack's hands came up and entangled in his hair, gripping it tightly as he pressed Ianto's head savagely against his neck. His hips began to swivel repeatedly into Ianto's, nearly making his mouth lose the connection as soft waves of pleasure erupted throughout his body every time their erections rubbed urgently together.

After a few moments Ianto pulled away and gently kissed the deep red mark that was left behind. He knew Jack wouldn't let him get away without telling him what he had in mind for much longer, but there was something inside of him that wanted to delay it as much as possible. As soon as he realised it was another part of his logical mind causing the problem, he pulled up and looked Jack in the eyes, feeling the other man's hands drop down to his shoulders.

"I...I want to..." Ianto heard his voice stutter and had to fight against the urge to cringe at how nervous he sounded. "I want to taste you Jack. Can I?"

Jack stared at him, his mouth slightly ajar as he groaned deeply and gripped Ianto's body tight against his. Within seconds, Ianto saw Jack's eyes fall half closed and darken with lust as his hips rocked upwards once more. He could feel the older man's heart thundering against his chest, almost as if it was trying to match the one beating on top of it. Ianto felt Jack's hands move back to his hair as he practically yanked their mouths together again, sucking at and flicking their tongues together in another deep kiss that seemed to go on for an eternity.

Just as he felt like he was about to pass out from lack of oxygen, Jack pulled back and stared deeply into his eyes. Gasping unevenly for air, he smiled down at him, a supercilious grin that made Jack chuckle slightly under his breath.

"Are you trying to kill me Ianto?" The sound of Jack's voice was ragged and deeper than Ianto had ever heard it before. "I mean it seriously, you're going to give me a heart attack."

He didn't reply to Jack's question, just leaned forward and began to lick at Jack's neck again, his teeth brushing over the love bite he'd left earlier. He moved down to Jack's chest and began to press soft kisses along Jack's collarbone, his tongue flicking out occasionally to savour the inimitable flavour of his skin. The pheromones exploded over every one of his taste buds and he knew that no matter what happened with Jack in the future, that unique essence would remain with him for as long as he lived. Just as he was about to drift further down Jack's well toned chest he felt the older man twine his fingers in his hair again and pull his head up to gaze at him.

"I'm starting to think you like tugging on my hair just a tad too much Jack."

Jack furrowed his eyebrows, looking slightly abashed as he started to relax his grip. Ianto's hand flew up and covered both of Jack's before he could remove them, holding them in place. He knew that as soon as he went down on Jack, those fingers were going to be gripping him even tighter, and the feel really didn't bother him. He was just trying to avoid the question he knew the other man was about to ask him.

"Ianto, are you sure you want to do this? You're not just trying to avoid me fucking you, are you?"

He heard a tone of uncertainty in Jack's voice and smiled at him, leaning forward to brush his lips lightly over the other man's chest. He glanced up momentarily and winked at him before he finally felt he had enough courage to answer the question.

"I'm sure Jack. I'm not trying to avoid anything."

Leaning forward, he began to run his lips and teeth lightly over Jack's upper chest as he continued speaking between every flick and swirl of his tongue.

"I've been bloody dreaming of it for what seems like forever." He ran his tongue down Jack's chest in one long streak until he reached one of Jack's hard nipples.

"I want to taste you Jack."

His lips closed over the nub, sucking it deep into his mouth, moving it gently back and forth between his teeth. He released it momentarily, then repeated the action again, this time flicking his tongue over the tip as he rubbed it between the hard tips of his incisors. Jack's body arched beneath him pressing his chest further into Ianto's mouth, a long guttural groan escaping from him at the same time.

"Oh my fucking god..."

Ianto released the nipple again, licking his way across Jack's chest until he reached the other one, giving it the exact same treatment. Jack's hips propelled up several times and Ianto felt the other man's hard cock press frenziedly into his lower abdomen, making him moan and bite down a little more viciously than he'd intended.

"Ianto, yes!" Jack jumped and nearly screamed above him, his hips stuttering wildly against Ianto's body.

Jack's hands were suddenly pushing at his shoulders, pressing him downward. He released the nipple and ran his teeth lightly down Jack's stomach until he came to his navel, laving and nibbling at the hard plains of muscle around it.

"Fuck Ianto, please! You're such a fucking tease!"

Ianto laughed and reached down to undo the catch and zip of Jack's trousers, yanking them over his hips. Jack's erection sprang free landing heavily against his stomach and Ianto pulled away from the other man's navel, running his tongue up the underside of the cock as it lay before him. He pulled Jack's trouser down further, intending to remove them completely when Jack reached down with a shaking hand and stopped him. Ianto looked up at him, confusion clearly etched over his features.

"No Ianto." He drew in a deep breath, his gaze locking with Ianto's questioning one. "I told you last time that you wouldn't see me nude again unless I was fucking you. I meant it. You'll have to work around them."

Ianto nearly froze with shock as Jack's words penetrated his lust filled mind. He could hardly think with Jack's throbbing erection laying in front of him, his mouth watering from the idea of what he was about to do. Not to mention the fact that he was fucking nervous as hell, even if he was trying to hide that fact from Jack. Now he just had to figure out a way around those bloody trousers.

Jack looked down at him, his eyes sparkling with amusement and quite a bit of hunger. He knew this was Jack's idea of getting what he wanted from Ianto, but he wasn't about to give in. Grinning mischievously, he pulled completely back, pressed Jack's legs up, and crawled between them, effectively wrapping the older man's thighs around him. The trousers stayed around Jack's ankles as Ianto leant forward and gripped Jack's cock in his hand, running his tongue around the head in one large swipe.

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TBC

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_AN: Feedback appreciated!! :D_


	24. Chapter 24 Easier Than Expected

_AN: Thanks go to mama rocks! She's just perfect at pointing out exactly what needs work! :D_

_Also, thank you to everyone out there who reviewed and was patient enough to wait for this chapter! Hopefully it's worth it! :D_

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Chapter 24 - Easier Than Expected

The moment Ianto had pushed his legs up Jack knew that he had pretty much lost the argument. He didn't get a chance to change his mind as Ianto ran his tongue around his cock, making him buck up into the silky wetness that keep circling the head over and over, leaving a damp streak behind that sent shivers down his erection whenever the cool air hit it. His mind actually went blank for a moment, his hands gripping Ianto's shoulders tightly, before he was able to concentrate enough to think about the restriction he'd just placed on their lovemaking.

If there was one thing he didn't like during sex, it was ridiculous restrictions.

He tried to focus as he felt Ianto's arms wrap around his thighs, his fingers tracing soft intricate patterns along them, his tongue never letting up in its movement. Jack was nearly going insane with every swipe of that hot wet tongue, his lungs struggling to catch a breath, his thoughts completely muddled. Ianto just kept laving him in the same pattern, slowly and seductively, like he had all the time in the world.

"Ianto take...oh God..."

Pushing back on Ianto's shoulders, he ran his fingers through the tiny hairs on the nape of the young man's neck before he was finally able to get him to look up.

"Ianto! Please...ah...take..." Jack sputtered, trying to get the words from his chest.

Ianto didn't let him finish as he grinned somewhat devilishly and leant forward, flicking the tip of his tongue over the small opening at the end of Jack's cock. He kept staring at Jack as his lips wrapped around the head and sucked on it, hard.

Bright lights flashed in front of Jack's eyes, a howl ripping from his chest, his hands gripping Ianto's shoulders so tight he was sure he would leave bruises. He closed his eyelids momentarily, trying to wipe the image from his mind, long enough to be able to concentrate on what he was trying to say.

It didn't work. For as long as he'd known Ianto, one of the things he'd most wanted was the young man's lips wrapped around his cock. Now that he had him there, he was having a hard time trying to remember what he was going to tell the young man. It was only when he tried to spread his legs further to give Ianto more room and found his ankles practically locked together that he remembered exactly what he was trying to say.

"Oh God Ianto...take them...ah... off!" He said, the words nearly lost in a moan. "NOW!"

Ianto pulled back from Jack's erection, sat up on his knees between his legs, and reached behind his own body tugging the trousers off of Jack's ankles. As soon as Jack was free, Ianto pulled completely away from him and stood up next to the bed, looking down at his nude body with a hungry expression on his face. Jack was just about to ask him where he was going when Ianto quickly undid his own trousers and kicked them and his briefs off his legs. He picked them up and grabbed the rest of his clothes from the end of the bed, placing them on a chair that was shoved into one of the corners of the small room.

Ianto turned back towards him and Jack ran his tongue along his lower lip, just before he bit down on it, every cell in his body screaming at him to just stand up and grab the young man and pull him onto the bed. He gasped for air, his mouth going dry as he gazed at Ianto's body. His felt his erection throbbing against his stomach, desire ripping throughout him. His hands gripped the bed sheets tight between his fingers, beads of sweat breaking out on his forehead as he fought against the urges ripping through him.

Ianto lay down beside him and Jack groaned, his arms coming up to wrap around him. He closed his eyes as Ianto quickly made his way down Jack's body again, this time not teasing, but moving with singular determination. He heard a moaning keening noise coming from somewhere and was surprised to find the soft breathy sounds were escaping his own lips without him even realising it.

Just when he felt like he was going to go out of his mind, he felt Ianto's lips wrap around the head of his cock again, sucking more gently than the first time. Ianto's hand wrapped around the base of his erection and he thrust upwards, not even recognising how out of control he was until Ianto pulled back a little.

Before he knew what was happening, Ianto placed both his hands on Jacks hips and began to suck as much of his cock into his mouth as possible. Jack gripped Ianto's hair in his hands and tried to thrust upward into the deep wet heat that was moving over his pulsing flesh, only to be stopped by fingers tightening almost painfully on his waist. He groaned in disappointment, his eyes closing with pleasure as Ianto chuckled around his cock. The vibrations sent his head spinning. He wasn't going to last much longer If Ianto continued what he was doing.

Ianto pulled his mouth away for a moment, then came back and began to lick around the base of his erection. Jack barely noticed one of the hands disappearing from his hip, his mind was to focused on Ianto's lips as they moved down to his balls and sucked them gently inside his mouth. He felt Ianto teasing them as they rolled around the warm moist cavern guided by the rough texture of his tongue, and he groaned aloud as Ianto's other hand moved towards his aching erection, pumping it in time with every swipe of his tongue.

Suddenly, a wet finger pressed down on his perineum again and Jack all but screamed as waves of pleasure crashed through his body. He could feel a coiling in his abdomen, his heart pounding as he thrust up into Ianto's palm.

Ianto stopped and moved his hand to the base of Jack's erection, squeezing it tightly. He nearly screamed in frustration, his eyes opening wide to fly down to Ianto's face, only to find the young man staring at him with an expression of part amusement, part desire, and something Jack's lust addled mind couldn't quite comprehend. It took several moments for Jack to realise Ianto was speaking to him.

"Not yet Jack. I'm having too much fun." His voice was dark and practically dripping with desire.

Jack growled, his hands gripping Ianto's hair even tighter as he felt a spit slick finger teasing at his opening before pressing forward, impaling him in one swift thrust. Ianto chuckled hoarsely just before his scorching mouth engulfed Jack's cock again, eagerly sinking down on it. He shifted his body, arching his hips as Ianto pulled him deeper into his mouth, more than Jack ever expected from someone with such little experience.

"Oh fuck Ianto! Son of a bitch!"

A soft sheen of sweat broke out all over his body as he gasped for air, the slight tangy aroma of Ianto's coffee scent mixed with his own pheromones hit the back of his throat. The mixture was so potent that it coated his senses, drawing every bit of restraint he had left out of his mind. The sight of Ianto's dark mop of hair moving between his legs nearly sent his body spiralling out of control. After every teasing moment and the build up of anticipation, Ianto was almost exactly where Jack wanted him. The sound of Ianto's voice when he'd asked if he could taste Jack still echoed through his mind, continually sending shivers down his spine.

It was too almost much for him to comprehend as he watched and felt Ianto's head begin to bob up and down at a rapid pace, his tongue tracing the underside of Jack's erection, his throat tightening around the head.

Suddenly, Jack felt three things happen at once. Ianto's finger rubbed against his prostate, his thumb from the same hand pressed against his perineum, and Ianto began humming around his hardened flesh. All of it combined just enough to send him over the edge.

"Fucking hell, yes Ianto!"

His body arched up, his hips jerking sporadically as Ianto's spare hand held him down just enough so that the thrusts didn't press too deeply down his throat. Jack's body thrummed with energy, his eyes closing while it felt like the universe exploded around and out of him.

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Ianto swallowed Jack's come as quickly as he could, the bittersweet liquid sliding down his throat and coating his tongue, almost tasting like a concentrated form of Jack's pheromones. Jack was groaning heavily, his body writhing underneath Ianto's hands and he had to struggle to hold onto him, to make sure his thrusting didn't go too deep. Jack gripped his hair tightly one more time, just before he started to relax his body back onto the bed.

Before he could go completely boneless, Ianto wrapped his lips tighter around velvety smooth flesh in his mouth and sucked harder than he had previously. He pressed his finger deeper into the other man's body, massaging his prostate at the same time.

"Uhhhhhjeeesyannntooo!"

The scream echoed around the room as Ianto held Jack's hips down almost brutally, a feeling of deep satisfaction cascading throughout his body. Jack's cock spasmed inside his mouth and Ianto sighed as he felt and tasted one last surge of come coat his tongue. He held it in his mouth for a moment before swallowing it and pulling back, letting the softening cock slip from his lips. Ianto continued lapping at Jack's softening erection, his own eyes closed in amazement. After everything, he never thought he'd be able to get such a strong reaction from Jack. The very idea that he could affect the older man in such a way made him ecstatic.

He pulled back completely as Jack collapsed bonelessly onto the bed, looking more sedate and peaceful than Ianto had ever seen. Crawling upwards, he lay down next to Jack, delighted to feel the older man turn towards him and grip him tightly within his arms as he snuggled closer to him.

"Christ Ianto that must have been some fucking research." Jack said suddenly his voice somewhat serene.

Ianto laughed lightly, turning towards the older man and brushing his lips tenderly over Jack's in an almost chaste kiss. He was shocked when Jack deepened it, his tongue swiping throughout Ianto's mouth, a soft groan against his lips. He suckled at Jack's lips, his hands coming up to grip the older man's arms tightly between his fingers.

Jack pulled away from him and kissed his way across his cheek until he reached his ear, drawing it between his teeth and biting down. Ianto gasped, his eyes slamming shut as he gripped the arm that Jack had around his chest tightly between his fingers.

"It's your turn Ianto." Jack whispered as he blew softly into his ear.

Ianto struggled to breathe, his nails clawing into the other man's arm as an electric quiver cascaded through every part of his body, making his cock throb. Jack's hands ran down his sides, curving around to grip his arse pulling their bodies close together until Ianto's erection was pressed against his hip. He thrust forward, the friction of skin on skin just enough to make him groan with satisfaction. Somewhere behind his lust saturated brain he realised that Jack was obviously a hell of a lot more alert then he seemed.

He gasped again as Jack pushed him onto his back and moved between his legs. His eyes opened, locking on the bright blue eyes of his captain's as he felt a hand run across his chest and tweak one of his nipples almost painfully. He couldn't stop the sudden way his back arched or how his hips thrust upwards as it sent waves of satisfaction down his torso and straight through his heavily leaking cock.

Jack grinned at him rather mischievously and leant forward again capturing Ianto's other nipple between his teeth, running it delicately between them. His fingers ran through the coarse trail of hair that led towards Ianto's cock, stopping occasionally to caress different parts of his abdomen.

"Bloody hell Jack..."

His words were cut off abruptly when Jack's hand finally moved towards where he wanted it most. Ianto growled, his thigh muscles clenching as Jack ran his nails gently around the base of his cock, avoiding touching any part of it. Ianto drew in a trembling breath and shivered with anticipation just before a groan of disappointment ripped from his lungs as Jack bypassed his erection completely, his fingers travelling down to caress his thighs instead.

Jack tried to pull even further away from his cock and he felt something inside of him snap. He wrapped his legs tightly around the other man's waist and yanked him forward so that their pelvises were flush against one another. Jack's cock was only half erect but the feel of his skin as it met Ianto's still made him cry out. Jack's hands landed heavily on his chest as he tried to keep his balance.

"God Jack...I want...I need..."

A delicate shiver ran down his spine when Jack leant forward and ran his tongue around his lips just before he pressed it forward and ground their mouths together. Ianto's fingers clenched tightly against Jack's back, his nails digging into the hard muscled flesh as he tried to hold the older man against him.

It didn't work. Jack pulled away and moved back to his ear, whispering softly into it.

"What do you want Ianto?"

Jack rocked his hips hard into Ianto's, his eyes alight with mischief as he stared down at him. Ianto opened his mouth then closed it again as he struggled to find a way to speak around the overwhelming blinding pleasure that was wracking throughout him. He swallowed, then opened his mouth again only to find himself still unable to speak.

Jack stopped moving against him and began to pull away, drawing in a deep breath of air as their pelvises separated by a few inches. He reached back and began to unwind Ianto's legs from around his waist and Ianto suddenly found his voice.

"Bloody hell Jack!_**Please**_ don't…"

He ignored the grin on Jack's face at his words. There was no way he was going to give in to that again. He would just have to make sure Jack stayed on top of him until he got his own release. Jack's body settled down between his legs as their eyes locked.

"What do you want Ianto?" he whispered so softly that Ianto had to prop himself up on his elbows just to hear him better.

"Just touch me Jack…"

Ianto dropped backwards onto the bed and closed his eyes, feeling a shudder wrack through him when Jack wrapped his hand around his cock. He was already halfway over the edge, and just the feel of that hand drove him even closer. He opened them again when Jack didn't move, just kept his fingers wrapped tightly around his throbbing flesh.

"I'm touching you. Are you sure that's all you want Ianto?"

He moaned again, trying to figure out exactly what Jack was attempting to get from him. For some reason, Jack wasn't going to do anything unless he asked for it. He was going to go out of his bloody mind if the other man kept this up.

"Oh God, oh fuck…I can't."

His body unexpectedly bucked up into the palm that gripped him as he sought out friction. He didn't care what type it was as long as Jack kept holding him. A growl of frustration escaped him when Jack followed the movement with his hand, not allowing it to pump against him the way he needed. Jack squeezed his erection in his palm and he cried out, a wave of electricity shooting down the rigid flesh.

"Fuck Jack! Move your hand over me. _**Please just fucking move**_!"

Jack's hand began to move slowly over him, up and down in soft subtle strokes, nearly sending him out of his mind. His hips rocked upwards, fighting to speed up the leisurely pace that Jack had set, but the older man just kept the same speed, never faltering in steadying Ianto's thrusts back to the tempo he was setting.

Suddenly, Jack leant forward and ran his tongue along Ianto's ear, never breaking his rhythm. Ianto growled as Jack spoke again,

"I'm following your directions Ianto. You asked me to touch you. You asked me to move my hand…"

Jack nibbled Ianto's ear, his hand keeping the unhurried pace, the faint touch moving up and down. Jack's head travelled down, his tongue flicking out to taste Ianto's skin as it moved. He stopped near Ianto's collarbone and flicked his tongue over the skin just before he drew it deeply into his mouth and bit down. Ianto felt Jack's other hand move up his abdomen as Jack's lips wrapped around the skin of his neck, sucking hard. Just the knowledge that Jack was marking him was enough to make him gasp. He groaned again, his eyes slamming shut as it felt like a million sensations invaded his body. Jack released his neck and moved further down, sucking even harder in a different area. After a moment, Ianto felt his mouth relax, releasing the skin with a wet smack that echoed around the room.

Just as he was about to scream in frustration, Jack pulled away and spoke in a low hoarse voice.

"Are you sure this is enough Ianto?"

Ianto snarled, just barely realising what he was doing as the sound came out. If he didn't know any better, he would've sworn Jack was trying to drive him completely batty. He was so bloody aggravated that he was damn close to rolling Jack over and shoving his cock into the other man, just so he could get some fucking relief.

The only problem was that there was no way he was going to be able to pull away from what little sensation he already had. He struggled to draw in a deep breath, hearing the sounds of his own harsh breathing surround him. It took a moment for his mind to finally latch on to Jack's words. His hands reached down and gripped Jack's arse tightly between his fingers as he suddenly understood exactly what Jack wanted from him.

"Bloody hell Jack! Christ, either move faster or take me in your mouth. I don't fucking care as long as you let me come! _**PLEASE**_!"

Jack's hand sped up as soon as the words spilled from his lips, causing him to nearly scream with satisfaction. His fingers tightened around Ianto's cock, adding a slight twist with every downward stroke. Ianto's hips rocked into the movement, every thrust drawing him closer to completion. Just as he was about to come, Jack swiped his fingers over the heavily leaking head of his cock and pulled his hand completely away from it.

Ianto's eyes began to water, a choked sob trickling from his lips. He stared at Jack with his eyes half closed in frustration and anger. Jack brought his fingers up to his lips, keeping his eyes locked with Ianto's as he put them into his mouth and sucked on them, drawing them deep into his mouth. He pulled them back out and leant forward until his lips were a hairsbreadth away from Ianto's as he spoke his next words.

"I'm sorry Ianto, I need to taste you. I need you to come in my mouth, just like I came in yours."

Without waiting for a response, Jack proceeded down Ianto's body and swallowed his cock all the way to the root. Ianto screamed as he thrust into the scorching depths of Jack's mouth, his body suddenly rigid. He thrust upward, his hands gripping Jack's hair so tight that he was almost certain he was pulling some of it out, as he came deep in Jack's throat.

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Jack groaned as he felt the warm liquid hit the back of his throat. For a moment, just after he'd pulled his hand away from Ianto, he had been almost frightened of the look on the young man's face. He had wanted to tease him a little more, but it was at that point he'd realised that he might have been pushing too far. He'd done the only thing he could think of, sucking down all of Ianto's cock, knowing that the young man had probably never had someone in bed who could deep-throat him before.

He swallowed every bit of Ianto's come, relishing the sound of his scream as it echoed around them. He raised his hand and began to massage Ianto's balls, pulling back just as the young man grunted and thrust spasmodically a few more times, his cock still twitching and spurting onto Jack's tongue.

Ianto groaned as he collapsed onto the bed, his body looking utterly sedate and serene. Jack swiped his tongue over Ianto's rapidly shrinking cock, laving it before letting it slip wetly from his mouth, pressing a soft kiss on the head as he pulled completely away.

Ianto reached down and grabbed him, tugging him upwards until Jack was stretched out next to him. His arms wrapped around Jack's body as he turned and placed his head against Jack's chest, his eyes closing with exhaustion. Jack lay there for a moment before reaching up and running his hands through Ianto's hair, letting the short strands weave through his fingers. He chuckled lightly and Ianto's face turned towards him, his eyebrow arched in confusion.

"You know, it was a helluva lot easier to get you to beg then you said it would be."

TBC

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_AN: Reviews appreciated and responded to! But I do understand if you don't want to. This story **will **get written either way...lol._


	25. Chapter 25 Tripping Over the Edge

_AN: Okay, so first, I'm going into hiding until the uproar around this chapter dies down...lol. Don't worry, I'll keep writing, but please don't throw rotten tomatoes my way. Just to let you know, there are about 5 different versions of this chapter. The boys just couldn't make up their mind on what they wanted to do._

_I __**REALLY **__want to thank mama rocks for her beta job and her help on this chapter. You folks reading have no idea how much better she makes it. :D_

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Chapter 25 - Tripping Over the Edge

Ianto growled and grabbed Jack's wrists as he rolled his body fully on top of the other man's. There was no way that he was going to allow Jack to think that he'd relented in any way, though if he was honest with himself he was more ready then he wanted to let on. After everything they'd already done, he knew that it could only get better, and the thought of Jack thrusting deep into his body was enough to make his cock twitch again with arousal.

Leaning forward, Ianto nipped at Jack's lower lip his teeth worrying the soft skin gently. Jack groaned and Ianto pulled away from him, a smug grin flitting over his mouth. Every time he managed to get a reaction out of Jack, he felt empowered in a way that he never knew possible. It was something he could focus on, a way to prove just how much Jack wanted him.

He left his mouth a hairsbreadth away from Jack's, chuckling softly when he heard another low groan, this time of frustration when he refused to give in and kiss him. Instead he spoke, his own voice sounding huskier than ever he'd heard it before.

"I did no such thing sir. If I recall correctly it was you begging me to take off your trousers."

Jack grinned at him, his blue eyes sparkling with mirth, reflecting the dim light around them. Leaning up, he pressed a swift kiss against Ianto's lips just before he thrust his body unexpectedly upwards and rolled both of them over. Ianto barely had time to struggle as Jack twisted his hands around and captured both of his wrists within one of his palms. Ianto groaned, his cock hardening even further, all his arguments escaping his mind as Jack pressed their groins roughly together.

"I _**don't**_ think you're recalling correctly Ianto. Ironically enough..." Jack said unfalteringly as he tilted his hips again, "for once, I think I can actually prove you wrong."

Ianto blinked a few times, his mind completely befuddled. Despite the fact that he had felt fully sated a mere five minutes before, he was nearly ready to grab Jack and snog him senseless, thrusting against him until he came again. He arched his body, his hands opening and closing in frustration within the confines of Jack's restraining one. He really wanted to touch Jack, to feel the skin sliding smoothly against his.

He was surprised when Jack suddenly released his wrists and pulled back until he was kneeling between his thighs, looking down at him with a hint of vainglory. Ianto moved to grab him, but Jack pushed his arms back down just before he moved his own hands behind his back, with a completely innocent look on his face. Ianto's mouth dropped open in shock as the raspy and desperate sound of his own voice suddenly echoed throughout the tiny room begging Jack to let him come.

"What the bloody hell? How did you..."

His words were cut off as Jack covered him again, this time sealing his mouth against Ianto's, weaving their tongues together slickly. The kiss was rough and desperate, so hard it might have hurt, except that Ianto was pressing back just as vigorously. Jack's teeth grazed his lips and Ianto felt a shudder wrack his body as he fought for dominance over the kiss, pressing their mouths together with even more force. His hands came up to grip Jack's body closer, his nails digging into the hard muscles of the other man's arse. He growled as he tried to push Jack back over, only to have the other man hold him down by pressing against him vehemently.

They struggled against each other for a moment, almost wrestling, until Jack finally pulled away, his lips kiss swollen and quirking with a grin. Ianto glared at him for a moment with his eyes narrowed, then couldn't stop a deep laugh escaping from his chest, or the wide smile that graced his own mouth. Jack laughed with him, the sound sending waves of relief throughout Ianto's entire body.

Ianto's laughter superseded into a groan the moment Jack rocked their hips together once more, his eyes nearly rolling back in his head. Amusement faded quickly becoming replaced by a burning desire that invaded his whole body. Staring up at Jack's face he finally admitted to himself that he was ready for Jack to fuck him. He wanted more than anything to feel Jack taking him, thrusting deep into his body and making him lose control.

"I'm..." he said with a low voice, almost unaware that he was speaking until he had already started, "...ready Jack. I need to feel you. I need you to fuck me."

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Jack struggled for a moment, every part of his body screaming to just take Ianto up on his offer. His smile faltered for a moment, then came back somewhat haltingly. Something was stopping him, something that told him Ianto didn't quite know what he was asking for. If he actually gave in, there was no turning back for the young man. He knew that 21St century people lived within very defined categories. Ianto had never been in a relationship with a man before and Jack was almost certain this was a step further than the young man realised in the midst of a lust filled moment. At this point, Ianto could still walk away and brush the whole thing off as curiosity. Just because he'd explained that there were emotions involved, didn't mean Ianto fully comprehended the depths that they could get to.

Rocking his hips into Ianto's, he leant forward and ran his lips along the young man's jaw line, moving up until they brushed against the lobe of Ianto's ear.

"You're not ready Ianto." He breathed softly as he ran his hand over Ianto's chest, stopping to tweak one of his nipples.

"You may think you are, but there's still some doubt left. I can see it clearly when you look at me."

Ianto growled and grabbed Jack's hand on his chest trapping it and not allowing him to move. He wrapped his other arm around Jack's waist, pulling their bodies tightly together. Jack tried not to wince, but Ianto tightened his grip even further as he spoke with a slightly menacing tinge in his voice.

"I'm not going to fucking beg Jack. Forget your God damn fantasy."

Jack pressed his lips against Ianto's throat, sucking and biting at the soft skin. Ianto released his hand and grasped Jack's hair tightly between his fingers, pulling him away from what he was doing. Their eyes met and Jack was honestly surprised at the angry glare that challenged him.

"You're not going to distract me Jack. Just bloody tell me, yes or no?" he said with a growl.

Jack tilted his head, staring down at Ianto almost quizzically. Pressing his lips upwards against Ianto's neck as he spoke softly, making sure his breath slid into Ianto's ear with each word.

"Turn over Ianto....on your hands and knees."

Ianto looked at him, suspicion written over every aspect of his face. Everything from his arched eyebrow to his slight scowl told Jack that the young man knew he was up to something. Instead of arguing he released Jack and pushed him away. He was still watching Jack with doubt as he rolled onto his stomach and propped his body up. He spread his legs minutely, giving Jack unrestricted access and a view that made Jack struggle to maintain control.

Jack sucked in a deep breath, drawing in the air until it filled every bit of his lungs. Every cell in his body was screaming at him to take what Ianto was offering him and just deal with consequences later. However, under the lust and need that all but consumed him, he maintained enough control to draw out the anticipation. When he finally did take Ianto and made sure he owned him body and soul, Ianto would understand why he had kept control for so long.

He closed his eyes, trying to block out Ianto's luscious muscular frame from his mind. The image still assaulted him, but it was much easier to regain his senses when he didn't have the temptation invading his sight. He took a few deep breaths and opened his eyelids again, with a much stronger hold on his control. Reaching forward, he ran his palm down the young man's spine, mapping out each ridge with his fingertips. When his hand reached the soft swell of Ianto's arse, Ianto groaned and dropped his head, his breathing starting to come in soft shallow panting gasps.

Jack leant forward and draped his body over Ianto's, resting all of his weight against the young man's frame. He wanted to show him something of what to expect, but wasn't sure Ianto would accept it. Leaning forward, he grazed his lips and teeth along the edge Ianto's ear, feeling the warm hard body shudder under him. While Ianto was distracted he dug between the bed and wall, pulling out a small bottle of lube.

He dropped the small tube beside their bodies and began to press soft kisses along the ridge of Ianto's ear as he started to speak in a near whisper.

"I could make you beg Ianto, you do know that right?"

He ran has hands down Ianto's arms, caressing every inch before bringing his fingers back up to run along the young man's shoulders.

"It would be so easy, and such a fucking turn-on."

Jack sat up, making sure his own cock rested against the round hills of Ianto's arse as he grasped the young man's shoulders and pulled their bodies flush against one another. Reaching down, he grabbed the lube he'd just dropped and flicked it open with his finger, then turned it over dribbling it on his own cock. He closed the bottle and dropped it again, then grasped Ianto's arse, spreading the globes so that his cock slid smoothly in the valley between them. He gave a few experimental thrusts, closing his eyes as pleasure radiated from the easy slide of skin against skin.

Ianto bucked backwards against him, keening loudly, causing Jack to nearly growl in frustration. For a moment, he'd lost himself and forgotten exactly what he was trying to do. He continued where he'd left off, his voice cracking a little more than he'd like as he spoke.

"I could rim you. From how you reacted before, that would have you damn near writhing. Can you feel it Ianto? Can you feel my hot and moist tongue thrusting into your body, over and over? Can you feel the rough ridge coating that tight ring of muscle as I point my tongue and press deep into you?"

Jack pulled back and ran his tongue down Ianto's spine, fighting the urge to laugh as the young man groaned and arched into the wet touch. He pulled back even further dipping the tip of his tongue into the beginning crevice of Ianto's bottom, flicking it just above where he knew Ianto was aching to have him. Ianto groaned and shifted his body, tilting his stomach towards the bed as he tried to shift closer to the invading and teasing tongue.

Jack straightened back up, lined up his cock, grasped Ianto's hips and thrust against his body again, gasping as he felt the tight ring of muscle flexing against the bottom of his cock. He knew Ianto had done it deliberately, but there was no way he was going to acknowledge it. If he had any chance of reigning in the urge to just thrust into Ianto's body, he was going to have to remain dominant. Instead he curved his hand around Ianto's hip and wrapped his fingers around his weeping cock. Until that moment, he'd been avoiding touching Ianto's erection. Ianto made a noise that was something of a cross between a growl and a groan as Jack's fingers began to stroke his hard flesh. Ianto's hips canted into the rhythm, keeping up with the slow steady stroking of Jack's hand.

Jack closed his eyes, giving in to the urge to thrust heavily a few times against Ianto's arse. Some of the sounds that escaped Ianto's lips when he pleasured him hit Jack with way too much emotion. Ianto was one of the most receptive lovers he'd ever been with, and Jack knew with his history, that was an indication of something he really didn't want to focus on.

"Bloody hell Jack, would you just fuck me!" Ianto said suddenly, his voice high and coated with need.

Jack didn't answer him. Instead he pulled his cock away from Ianto's arse, letting it slide down against the young man's perineum and nudge against his balls. The temptation to just spread Ianto open and thrust deep inside of him was starting to get a little too intense, a little too real. He kept moving one hand over Ianto's cock as his other one stroked over the young man's cheeks, squeezing and moulding the tight flesh between his fingers.

"I could press my fingers deep into your body, stretching you, sliding my fingers against your prostate as I pull back. Just when you'd start to think I was about to remove my fingers, I'd thrust into you again even harder."

Jack ran his thumb through some of the lube that was coating Ianto's arse and pressed it against the tight ring of muscle, surprised as it gave way with absolutely no resistance. His thumb slid smoothly into Ianto's body all the way to the knuckle. He thrust his groin against Ianto as the young man's body gripped the digit tightly, flexing and releasing around it. Ianto's hips rocked quicker and more urgently against Jack's hands.

"God, Ianto, you are so fucking tight." Jack said before he could stop himself.

He was still mentally kicking himself as he spoke again, almost as if he had no control over his own mouth.

"So fucking hot and so fucking tight."

He shook his head and bit down on his lip to stop anything else from escaping. Pulling his thumb back, he thrust it inward again and was rewarded when he heard a groan come from Ianto as it invaded his body. Jack shifted his legs pressing Ianto's thighs closed around his cock and thrust forward, groaning himself as his cock slid smoothly between Ianto's thighs.

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Ianto was ready to lose his bloody mind. Every fucking word out of Jack's mouth was drilling through his nerves and making him ache to feel the other man's cock inside of him. Every movement of his hands on Ianto's body drove the anticipation higher and higher. The need was beginning to burn through his body, making him feel as if he was going to spontaneously combust if Jack didn't fuck him soon. Even though he'd already demanded Jack take him, he had a feeling it wasn't going to be enough. For some reason Jack had an inane notion that Ianto still wasn't ready.

'_If I was any more bloody ready, I'd roll over, spread my legs and __pull him close enough to draw him into my fucking body.'_ He thought as Jack shifted against him again, drawing a moan from deep inside his chest.

Unfortunately, Ianto was too bloody distracted to concentrate enough to do so. Every time he settled on doing what he was thinking, Jack's mouth would spout something else that would drive the idea from his mind. Just the feel of Jack's slick hand moving over his cock was going to make him come. The fact that Jack's own erection was sliding with quick short stokes against his perineum and rubbing along his hole was nearly enough to force him over the edge. Every forward thrust nudged the head of Jack's cock against his balls, making Ianto see bright flashing lights as he squeezed his eyes tightly shut, fighting for control over his own body.

Ianto's body moved uncontrollably against Jack's hands, thrusting forward into the slick tight palm and then backward into the thrusting thumb embedded deep within him. Ianto concentrated, focussing his thoughts trying one last time.

"God Jack, please quit teasing me. I _**want**_ to feel you inside of me." Ianto gasped out, his body tightening and coiling with pleasure, making the words come out sounding more like a growl then he intended.

"I _**need**_ you Jack...so fucking much."

Jack moaned and moved his hips quicker, thrusting his cock between Ianto's thighs with even more force. His thumb pulled out of Ianto's arse and Ianto allowed the pleasure to consume him as Jack's hand sped up stroking him, gripping him tighter in his palm. Just as Ianto thought Jack was going to finally give in, he felt Jack press two fingers into his body and drag heavily over his prostate.

Sharp spirals of pleasure and heat exploded in his abdomen. His balls drew close, his body coiling tightly, squeezing down against the invasion. He felt Jack's hand grip and twist over his erection as it swelled and throbbed in the tight grasp. Ianto gasped as he tumbled over the edge of control, crying out, come coating his abdomen with long spurts of heated wetness.

"Oh god!" Ianto groaned, his eyes slamming shut against the sensations overwhelming his body and mind.

"Ahhhhh...Jack!"

He heard a strange choking noise and realised it was coming from his own lips as the smell of Jack and sex invaded his senses. He kept gasping, every press of Jack's body against his causing sensation to spiral throughout him. Jack just kept thrusting heavily against him and Ianto knew that there was no way the other man was going to fuck him now. He wasn't sure if Jack had ever intended to in the first place.

As his mind began to settle and calm down, Ianto found himself gasping, his lungs working heavily to draw in air. Jack's body dripped with sweat, sliding against Ianto's making his own cock twitch and contract with one last spasm of arousal. When he was finally able to focus, he realised he no longer cared if Jack fucked him _**this time**_. At the moment, more than anything, he just wanted Jack to lose control, to hear the other man moan his name as he came hard and consummately.

Ianto heard a growl behind him as Jack pulled his fingers out of his body and removed his hand from his cock. Jack's hands moved to encircle his waist, gripping it tightly as he draped his body completely against Ianto's, thrusting uncontrollably. He locked his elbows, making sure he was holding both their weight, allowing Jack to take whatever he needed from his body. Just as he was starting to wonder what was wrong, he heard a low frustrated groan echo in his ear and knew in some dim part of his sensibilities that Jack was struggling to find his completion. For some strange reason, he couldn't seem to get it.

He wanted to give Jack just as much pleasure as the other man had just given him. With every ounce of willpower he had, he focussed the only strength left in his body and squeezed his thighs tightly around Jack's cock.

"Ianto..." Jack gasped suddenly, his hips jerking roughly against him.

If he wasn't already straining to hold both their weight and had any strength left he would have tilted his hips. Either way it didn't matter as Jack's body froze against him, every muscle tense, his hands gripping Ianto's hips so tightly he was sure he would have bruises. Ianto felt wet liquid heat bathe his balls and groaned low in his throat. He shuddered at the feeling as he struggled to hold both of them up. He lost the battle collapsing bonelessly onto the bed, Jack draped heavily on top of him, surrounding him with his scent and warmth.

It took a few minutes for him to be able to move. Pressing backwards, he managed to roll Jack's heavy weight off of him. Jack moaned somewhat weakly and Ianto smiled softly as he rolled over and studied the other man, his heart still thundering in his chest. Jack's eyes were closed, his face completely relaxed. Just looking at him so sated and relaxed, sent a thrill of emotion running throughout Ianto's body, making his heart stutter inside his chest. The feelings were something he didn't want to focus too deeply on. He was too worried about what they actually meant.

Ianto leant forward and brushed his lips over Jack's. The kiss was gentle and soft, barely more than a slide of wet pressure against each other. He hear d a soft sigh escape from Jack's lips, the air blowing gently over his own, causing him to smile with contentment.

Ianto closed his eyes and pressed his body fully against Jack's, his head resting against the other man's neck. Just as he began to relax and let the exhaustion take over his body, Jack spoke in a low somewhat worry tinged voice.

"Are you disappointed Ianto?"

Ianto pulled his head up and cupped Jack's chin in his palm, their eyes locking. Jack's eyelids were half open, a hint of unsurety leaking through his expression and Ianto sighed shaking his head lightly.

"Why do I get the feeling there's something you're not telling me?"

Jack reached up and pulled him close, brushing his lips against Ianto's another soft light kiss. He sighed as he grasped Ianto's hand and weaved their fingers together. His other hand pressed Ianto's head back into his neck.

"There's quite a bit about me that I need to keep secret Ianto, but I'm not sure you'll believe me if I do tell you some of it."

Ianto close his eyes, drawing in a deep breath, allowing Jack's pheromones to invade his senses. He knew there were reasons, but something inside of him wanted to know everything about Jack, every nuance and every secret. He knew it was impossible, but he couldn't help hoping that someday Jack would open up to him.

"Why don't we talk about it in the morning Jack? I'm too bloody exhausted. You certainly know how to wear me out."

Jack's body shuddered under his and Ianto smiled as he realised Jack was chuckling under his breath.

"Go to sleep Jack."

Ianto followed his own advice and allowed the exhaustion to finally overcome him. Just as he was starting to drift off, he felt Jack's arms come up to wrap around him, drawing them even closer together.

TBC

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_AN:__ So seriously, the different versions of this chapter had everything from Ianto falling asleep to storming out. I think this was a nice compromise...lol. Reviews highly appreciated and responded to!_


	26. Chapter 26 Harsh Realities

AN: Thanks go to mama rocks for such an incredible BETA job on this chapter and for putting up with my stubbornness. :D

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Chapter 26 - Harsh Realities

Ianto opened his eyes, blinking rapidly as the soft light of the room struck his irises and caused his vision to clear. He stared rather unfocused at a lamp on his bedside table, then closed them again as he momentarily snuggled his body further under the warmth and softness of the sheets.

Even though he was still mostly asleep, something about the sight of that lamp bothered him. However, the exhaustion continued to cloud his thoughts, denying him the lucidity to understand what was wrong. Just as he was about to drift back into a blissful state of unawareness a thought finally flickered through his mind, making him open his eyes wide in shock.

'_That's not my lamp.'_

It took him a few seconds to actually comprehend where he was. After a minute more, his sleep addled mind began to clear a little and he sat straight up in bed, his body completely tense. The more he began to wake up, the more intense his embarrassment and shock began to grow.

Images of the previous night's activities with Jack assaulted his mind as well as the sound of his own voice begging Jack to let him come and pleading with him to fuck him. His hands came up to cover his face, horror shooting through every cell in his body.

_'What the bloody hell is wrong with me? Why the fuck did I beg?' _

He thought somewhat manically as he turned towards the other side of the bed.

_'Thank the bloody hell he turned me down.'_

Ianto tilted his head in slight confusion as his hand dropped down to the empty space beside him, feeling the still warm fabric run over his fingertips. He toyed momentarily with the idea of dressing and slipping out of the hub, but quickly discarded it. Jack had to have gotten up recently for the bed to still be dissipating his body heat. There was no way he'd be able to slip out if Jack was in the Hub. The best he could hope for would be for Jack to return and go back to sleep. Only then could he maybe escape without having to worry about confronting the other man.

He shook his head and glanced longingly towards the cover that hid Jack's bedroom, then lay back down somewhat reluctantly. He really didn't want to imagine what type of fuss Jack would kick up when he discovered Ianto gone, but he also didn't like the thought of having to wake up next to the older man in the morning. That would seem like a relationship, it would be too intimate.

Ianto closed his eyes quickly as a shadow crossed over the edge of the bed, cast down from Jack's office. There was a faint squeaking sound that resonated through the small room, which he assumed was Jack climbing down the ladder. He drew in a deep breath, letting it out slowly whilst trying to ignore the way his heart was pounding heavily against his ribcage. There was a slight rustle of clothing that indicated Jack was getting undressed. He felt the mattress dip slightly and nearly groaned in frustration when the sound of Jack's voice echoed softly into his ear.

"You're awful at pretending to sleep, you do know that right?"

He cracked his eyes open to find Jack's face right in front his, the bright blue of his eyes sparkling with a faint tinge of mirth. He was staring at Ianto with his eyebrows raised, his torso propped up on his elbow, seeming completely at ease with the situation. Ianto rolled his eyes, then sighed as he shifted to lie on his back, avoiding touching the other man in any way.

"What time is it?" he asked while he attempted to cover his movement.

Jack chuckled softly, reached over to him and pulled Ianto against him, wrapping his arms tightly around his waist and spooning their bodies together. Ianto sighed again, trying to relax within the circle of Jack's embrace only to find that he couldn't. The whole situation felt way too intimate. He could still envision his licentious behaviour and hear his words from earlier echoed through his mind. Sexual encounters were to be expected, especially considering it was Jack, but anything else seemed like a betrayal so soon after losing Lisa.

"About four in the morning. I wouldn't have gotten up but an alert went off. Turned out to be Myfanwy biting on a cord that was in her nest, but I took a look around anyway. It'll probably have to be fixed later."

Jack's hand raised and Ianto felt his fingers caress the nape of his neck drifting slowly back and forth, sending chills down his spine. Ianto just barely had enough presence of mind to remind himself not to tense up at the feeling. He tried to focus on the rough sound of his own breathing as the air moved heavily in and out of his lungs. He was so intent on staying in control that the soft sound of Jack's voice startled him, making him jump slightly. He opened his eyes, briefly trying to remember when he'd closed them and turned towards Jack's questioning gaze.

"What's wrong Ianto?"

Ianto closed his eyes again, slowly. He drew in a deep breath intending to tell Jack that he needed to leave, to go back to his loft and convince himself that he wasn't going completely batty. Instead, a question spilled from his lips, making him cringe.

"Why did you reject me last night Jack?"

He had no bloody idea why he'd asked the question, because he'd certainly never intended to address the issue.

'_As a matter of fact,'_ he thought rather erratically, _'I don't want to fucking know.'_

He shifted his body again, pulling away and looking Jack straight in the eye, afraid to hear the answer. The fear didn't stop his curiosity from growing, especially when he saw the expression on Jack's face. Jack stared at him rather quizzically, a frown marring his features in a way that Ianto had never seen before. Silence stretched between them, drawing out longer and longer, until Ianto was nearly ready to roll out of the bed, throw on his clothes, and flee back to his loft as quickly as possible.

"That wasn't a rejection Ianto." Jack said suddenly, his head turning away so that Ianto couldn't read his eyes.

"I just didn't think you knew what you were asking for. I still don't. Despite the fact that we've discussed this already on some level, I get the impression that you don't realise the implications of having sex with another man."

Jack turned back towards him, his eyes studying Ianto, almost as if he was trying to measure if he actually believed him.

"What a load of fucking rubbish Jack."

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Jack winced as the words left Ianto's mouth. As much as he hated to admit it to himself, Ianto was right. He wasn't being completely honest and it was certainly obvious. The issue wasn't entirely with Ianto, it was also with himself. Something about being with Ianto scared the hell out of him, even more than his own immortality did. From the first time he'd touched Ianto, he knew that the young man was a lot more open to the sensations then he even knew himself. He was honestly starting to worry that his attraction towards Ianto wasn't as blithe as he'd first thought, even after that damn wristband wreaked havoc.

'_Not that I can't blame myself for that fucking snafu as well.__'_

The musing crossed his mind almost fleetingly.

"Ianto, maybe we should get some more sleep. Three hours can't be nearly enough for you. As much as I hate to admit it, you're acting odd, almost to the point that I'd get suspicious again if I didn't know any better."

Ianto glared at him, his blue eyes looking like shards of ice, sending a chill deep throughout his body and nearly causing him to recoil. Instead of reacting he smiled at Ianto, ignoring his own thoughts as he berated himself. Ianto yanked away from him and rolled out of bed, grabbing his clothes and tugging them angrily onto his body.

Jack made no move to stop him. He was honestly too stunned to try. He knew he had no right to be confused, but he couldn't figure out why Ianto was so upset. All he had done was make a comment about them needing more sleep. As Ianto began to climb up the ladder to leave his room, he repeated what he said in his mind and finally figured out exactly why Ianto was so upset. Not only had he managed to hurt him hours before, but now he'd also made it sound like he didn't trust him. As much as he would like to think that Ianto knew better, he knew the young man still had doubts that Jack had forgiven him for the whole Lisa fiasco.

Jack scrambled out of his bed not bothering to get redressed and took off after him. By the time he got to the main part of the Hub, the elevator was on its way up to the tourist office. Without thinking of what he was doing he ran to the invisible lift, climbed onto it and used his vortex manipulator to start it moving.

The moment it reached the sidewalk, he saw Ianto storming up the stairs from the pier. He took off running towards him, only slightly feeling the cold misty rain that was coming down from the sky and beginning to condense on his bare skin. He caught Ianto just as he reached the top of the stairs, breathing a little heavier than normal. Ianto glanced at him, obviously not very focused on who he was and turned away heading towards the street. Just as Jack was about to call out to him Ianto froze and turned towards Jack staring at him with his mouth agape and his eyes open wide in shock. The expression would have been almost comical if Jack wasn't so worried about what Ianto had been thinking when he'd stormed out of the Hub.

"Are you fucking insane Jack? What the bloody hell are you doing? Has your mind gone completely barmy?"

Jack walked up to him and grabbed him, cupping Ianto's chin between his palms. Ianto tried to pull away but Jack wouldn't let him. Instead he saw Ianto's eyes shoot around the Plass somewhat worriedly. After a moment he relaxed slightly and his gaze locked with Jacks.

"You need to at least go inside and put something on. Beside the fact that you'll catch your death, you can't go running around starkers in Cardiff! You'll get arrested! You're lucky there's no one around..."

"Shut up Ianto." he said softy and with a little more forcefulness then he'd intended.

Ianto's mouth snapped closed so hard that Jack actually heard his teeth clash. He stared at Jack with just as much anger and frostiness as he had in his bedroom, before struggling to pull away. Jack tightened his grip and looked him directly in the eyes. Ianto tensed up but stopped struggling after a moment, still glaring at him coldly.

"I didn't mean that the way it came out. I do trust you Ianto...probably even more than you realise and more than I should, considering everything that _**has**_ happened in the past few months."

Ianto was still glaring at him, but Jack saw something in his eyes shift minutely, just enough to give him reason to continue with what he was trying to do. He stepped closer pressing against the heat of Ianto's body, only now realising that he was actually cold. Ianto tensed up, but didn't try to pull away from him. Jack took that as a good sign and released Ianto's chin, wrapping his arms around Ianto's shoulders, pulling their bodies flush against one another.

"You don't trust me Jack. No one does anymore. I understand why, I honestly do...but I wouldn't change what I did. I was trying to save her. She loved me..."

Ianto's eyes shuttered closed, his voice coming out so low that Jack almost had to strain to hear him.

"...and I loved her more than anything and anyone."

Jack rested his forehead against Ianto's, gazing at his face with concern. He knew the young man couldn't see it, but he obviously felt something because he relaxed heavily against Jack. Suddenly he pulled away, his eyes opening to lock on Jack's.

"So you see Jack, I really do understand. After everything, I know that I need to earn that trust back. I'm honestly starting to wonder if it's even possible. The moment I think I'm making progress, you say something that completely eradicates it and shows me just how much you don't trust me."

Jack sighed and leaned forward, close enough to brush his lips over Ianto's but not quite pressing them together. He let his breath ghost against Ianto's as he spoke, low and barely audible.

"Ianto, there's something I need to tell you...something that you might find hard to believe."

TBC

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_AN:Just to let you know, the next chapter is almost done so it shoudln't take near as long as this one. :D Reviews appriciated!  
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	27. Chapter 27 New Distractions

_AN: This chapter goes to my wonderful Beta Mama Rocks and to Silvercat63. Silvercat63 for helping me out when I was first having issues with it and Mama Rocks for helping me get it to place I was comfortable with! She was extremely patient with me on it…lol. _

_I hope everyone has a happy holiday, no matter what holiday you celebrate. This chapter is everyone's present! You a little smut and a little mystery! :D Enjoy it! Lots of angst coming up soon!_

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_Chapter 27 - New Distractions

Ianto sat silently at his desk hidden away deep in the archives. There was a noise coming from somewhere near the entrance but he was trying _'unsuccessfully'_ to ignore it. Normally when he came down here it was the silence that helped him to concentrate on whatever was bothering him. He'd been down here ever since the rest of the team had started arriving early that morning. After he and Jack had talked for several hours, long enough to last until Tosh arrived around 6:30, he'd needed to take some time away from everyone to think about their conversation.

He still had no bloody idea how to comprehend everything Jack had explained to him. The trust that Jack had shown him was nearly enough to make his mind completely scramble whenever he thought about it. He had absolutely no doubts about Jack's faith in him anymore. Now he just had to worry about whether or not he would be able to hold onto it. He was almost certain that what Jack told him hadn't been mentioned to anyone else at Torchwood, much less anyone in the 21st century. He still wasn't sure how to construe the confidence Jack had put in him.

Hell, he could barely understand the specifics of what it could mean for their somewhat existing relationship, if that's how he could even describe it.

They'd never even gone back to bed. Though he had made Jack finally put on some clothes. The sight of him standing nude and wet had caused too much havoc on Ianto's senses. He had a hard enough time concentrating on what Jack was telling him without the added distraction.

The noise began to get louder and Ianto sighed with frustration. If it kept up he was going to go completely barmy. After a little while longer he couldn't stand it anymore and he stood up to go check it out. Just as he took a few steps away from his desk, the noise stopped suddenly. He couldn't help the sigh of relief that escaped from him the moment it did. The bloody archives had an echoing quality that amplified noises no matter how minuscule they seemed to be.

Turning back towards his desk, he caught sight of something out of the corner of his eyes and paused for a moment to turn and stare at it. His head tilted in confusion as he studied the filing cabinet with Jack's name written clearly across one of the drawers in old fashioned handwriting. During his time at Torchwood three he had been too preoccupied with organising the deeper archives, they had seemed to need more attention. He'd chosen to merely to straighten up around his desk and his work area and focus on what was around it later. Of course, he had made that decision when he was still expecting to be gone with Lisa by then.

He walked over to the cabinet slowly studying it with more concentration than was probably required. After a moment longer he tugged hesitantly at the drawer, only slightly disappointed to find it locked. He had no idea why that bothered him, but it did. After all he was the bloody archivist wasn't he?

Though, if he was honest with himself, for some reason the sight of Jack's name on that cabinet sent a cold feeling throughout his body and covered his thoughts in icy unsurety. He _**was**_ curious, but there was a deeper feeling of anxiety coating it too. After a little longer to think about it, he started to realise that curiosity was winning the battle between the two. He tugged a little harder on it, trying to figure out a way inside, every time the drawer stopped at the catch.

'_There has to be a key somewhere. They're not going to keep it locked against the bloody archivist!'_ He thought as he turned to look at his desk speculatively.

He turned back towards the cabinet, his head slightly tilted as an idea struck him. There was no way the key was hidden in his desk, he would've known about it. However, there was a chance that whoever worked the archives before him may have used the old standby of actually putting it in an obvious hiding place. Just as he started to reach around the back of the cabinet to see if it was hidden there, the noise that had been bothering him, started up again, louder than before.

Ianto sighed aggrievedly and turned away from the cabinet, forgetting about it, yet storing the information in the back of his mind for later. He had to stop that bloody noise even if it turned out to be a God damn dragon trying to escape. He already had a slight headache from the first time, and he wasn't about to let it get any worse.

Making his way through the archives, he took several shortcuts behind a few crates and one that was actually hidden _**in**_ a crate. Every time he made his way through the place it reminded him vaguely of those Harry Potter books and the school the kids went to. The archives had that mystical quality and enough secrets that it could bloody well be Hogwarts. Of course, most of the stuff in the place would probably make those kids run screaming in terror.

As he neared the entrance, the noise began to grow louder, causing him to speed up. If something was that close to the main part of the Hub, there really was a likelihood it could escape and cause more havoc than he cared to clean up, not to mention the possibility that someone on the team could get hurt. He rounded one last corner and stopped suddenly, staring at the sight in front of him. For some strange reason, he couldn't make sense of what he was seeing.

Not only was Jack standing there with a devilish look on his face, but he was _**also**_ holding a small metal bar in his hands. As Ianto watched, Jack pulled back the bar and tapped it lightly against the metal frame of the shelves, causing the echoing noise he'd been hearing for the past half an hour.

Ianto groaned and closed his eyelids momentarily in frustration. The instant he opened them back up, Jack dropped the metal bar and stalked towards him, his own eyes filled with a predatory gleam.

"What the bloody hell Jack? That noise has been driving me batty for the past...."

Jack grasped him and pushed him backwards against one of the shelving units behind him, pressing his mouth heavily against Ianto's, cutting off the rest of the sentence. Ianto kissed him back automatically, barely comprehending what was going on for the first few seconds, but amused to note how natural the action was becoming to him. His hands came up and grasped Jack's braces and shirt, pulling him closer as Jack's tongue thrust between his lips, teasing and wrapping around his own. He felt Jack's teeth nip at his lips and he groaned as the action sent shivers down his body.

Jack's hands began to run down his sides and curved around to grasp his arse, pulling their pelvises together roughly and Ianto closed his eyes at the feeling. Every time Jack touched him it seemed to get more and more intense. Then again, after the way Jack had denied him the previous night, he was nearly ready to tear the other man's clothes off his body and push him to the floor, cold concrete be damned. Just as he began to rock his hips against the older man's Jack pulled away, his mouth pulling up on one side with a rascally grin, then turned and began to walk back towards the doorway to the Hub.

Ianto stood there, completely dumbstruck, snapping out of it just before Jack reached the doorway. He stalked after Jack, both annoyance and arousal shooting throughout every cell in his body. The moment he caught up with him he grasped his arm, turned him around, then pressed his body flush against Jack's forcing _**him**_ backwards and trapping him against the wall.

"Yes Ianto?"

"What the bloody hell was that about Jack? Do you have any idea how much that noise has been irritating me?" Ianto snapped at him, slightly harsher then he'd intended.

He softened his words by rocking his hips lightly against Jack's, pleased to note the other man's eyes darken slightly as their erections rubbed against one another through their trousers. It was the only thing that even hinted at the fact that Jack wasn't as unaffected as he made it seem. Ianto was pleased to note that he could actually tell the difference now. When Jack had first started this seduction of his, Ianto had honestly thought that the other man never got frustrated.

"I'm going out with Gwen to visit an old friend. I just wanted a kiss goodbye."

Jack smiled cheekily for a moment, his eyes flicking back and forth from Ianto's lips and eyes. Ianto gave in, brushing his lips lightly over Jack's before pulling away and arching his eyebrow in question. Even after he did so, Jack's gaze still continued to shift between his eyes and mouth. Just as he was about to give in and properly snog him, Jack burst out laughing, the sound coming from deep in his chest. Ianto joined him as the absurdity of the situation finally struck him.

Jack pushed against his chest half-heartedly and Ianto stepped back allowing him to move away from the wall. Jack glanced at him, started to turn away, then turned back the smile mostly gone from his lips and replaced with a worried frown.

"Ianto, have you...do you..." he paused for a moment, his tongue flicking out to wet his lips, anxiety clearly indicated in his eyes and voice, "...have any questions about what I told you this morning?"

----------

Jack watched Ianto's face, trying to read his emotions and failing miserably. In the short time he'd known the young man he'd been too good at hiding things. The whole situation with Lisa had proven that. As relieved as he'd been when Ianto had come back into the Hub with him, even though he'd insisted Jack get dried off and dressed, his reaction to what he'd told the young man still had him slightly worried.

Ianto sighed and Jack found himself wishing that he could stay and talk to Ianto, maybe even have wild sex somewhere deep in the archives. The problem was that he knew that Estelle really wanted him to come and see her seminar about her "good fairies" and after everything he'd put her through in the past, he didn't want to let her down, even if she did only believe that he was the son of the man she had once loved.

Walking forward he cupped Ianto's chin in his palms and leant forward to brush their lips lightly together. When he pulled away Ianto was staring at him in confusion, his mouth pouting slightly. The sight of Ianto's face in that expression had Jack struggling against his own fucking libido. There was something so completely innocent and yet sensuous in the way Ianto's lips tilted down slightly, the lower one a little puffed up. Every cell in his body screamed at him to just take Ianto, consequences of the future be damned.

He knew he didn't have the time for what he _**really**_ wanted to do, but he was also willing to concede and make a compromise with his wants. Pulling Ianto's arm up he glanced at his watch and noted that he still had a good hour before he had to leave. It might make him and Gwen a little late, but it would also be well worth it if he managed to make Ianto scream with pleasure.

Grinning lasciviously he pushed Ianto against the wall and fell to his knees, ignoring the way the young man's mouth fell open in shock. He had the catch on Ianto's trousers undone within seconds, pulling his boxer briefs out of the way and releasing the hard cock out of its confines. He ran his hand down the length of it lightly, his fingertips just barely making contact. Ianto shuddered and Jack smiled triumphantly when a small drop of precome appeared at the tip. Leaning forward, Jack licked the tip drawing in a deep breath of air as the salty fluid exploded over his taste buds. Of all the men he'd done this to in his long life, Ianto's unique flavour was something he'd never be able to forget.

Jack flicked his tongue out again, coating the glans of Ianto's cock with saliva. He kept his eyes on Ianto, watching him closely and looking up at him through his eyelashes. Ianto's head was thrown back, his chest heaving with every brush of Jack's tongue. Jack pulled away, wrapping his hand around Ianto's erection, pumping it languidly.

"Ianto, look at me. Don't take your eyes off me. If you do..." he said with a subdued voice as he stared at the unbridled lust Ianto's face exuded, "I'll stop. Understand?"

Ianto nodded slowly as their eyes locked and Jack smiled wickedly up at him. He was going to make sure that Ianto wouldn't be able to recover for hours after he walked out the door. Ianto watched him, his eyes half lidded as Jack leant forward and flicked his tongue over the head of his erection once more. His hand moved slightly quicker smiling softly when Ianto's hips began to thrust into the rhythm. He twisted his hand on a down stroke, then pulled back suddenly when Ianto closed his eyes.

"Jack...please..." Ianto said, his eyes opening again slowly, "God...please."

Jack felt Ianto shudder as he wrapped his hand around the hot throbbing cock again.

"How do you want to come Ianto?"

Ianto stared down at him, a slightly confused look on his face. The expression was odd as it mixed with the lust darkening his irises. Jack struggled for a moment, trying to hold onto his own frustration level. For some reason, when Ianto looked at him in that way, he wanted to grab the young man and fuck him until he couldn't walk straight.

"My hand?"

Jack moved his head back and began to stroke Ianto's cock faster for a moment, then slowed down again. Ianto groaned, his hips thrusting into the tight grip wrapped around him, trying to speed the strokes back up.

"My mouth?"

He watched Ianto's face closely as he leant in and ran his tongue along the bottom, down the length of his erection, pausing when he reached the end to blow a soft breath of air along the same path his tongue had travelled. Ianto groaned above him, his hands coming up to wind in the short strands of Jack's hair. Jack slid Ianto's cock between his lips, taking it fully into his mouth. Ianto moaned loudly, his fingers tightening and releasing reflexively in Jack's hair. As Jack began to bob his head up and down, Ianto's hips thrust rhythmically in tandem with the movement of his head.

Jack pulled back, quickly replacing his mouth with his hand, nearly laughing aloud when he saw the expression on Ianto's face. He looked like he was ready to throttle him. Soft moans randomly came from his mouth every time Jack twisted his hand or flicked his thumb over the glans of his erection.

"Or I could turn you around and press my cock into you?" Jack said hoarsely, the image suddenly vivid in his own mind.

"You want that don't you Ianto? You want me to fuck you? To take that part of you and make it completely mine?"

"Oh fuck Jack..." Ianto growled, his head twisting back and forth.

"Don't...Christ...don't ask me that. I know you...ahhh...w-won't do it."

Jack stood up suddenly, leaning in to nibble lightly on Ianto's earlobe. He knew Ianto was right, but at that moment, he was nearly ready to not even fucking care if it made him late. However, reason invaded his senses. He didn't want to make love to Ianto for the first time in the archives. When he finally took Ianto, he wanted it to be in a bed, with soft sheets that Ianto could grip and slide against as Jack thrust into him over and over.

"You're right Ianto. We can't right now. But the next time we have a moment alone and I don't have to be somewhere, I'm going to. It's time."

He smiled sinfully as Ianto's mouth dropped open and a low moan issued from his throat. It could have been from shock, but Jack had a feeling it was probably simply the way he ran his thumb around the young man's cock as he said the words.

"However, for right now..."

He dropped back down to his knees, relaxed his throat, and swallowed Ianto's length in one smooth motion. Ianto gasped, his hands coming back up to Jack's hair and gripping it tightly, almost painfully between his fingers. With a few flicks of his tongue along the underside of Ianto's cock, Jack had the young man coming, harder than he ever had during any of their sexual dabbling.

"Oh God!"

Jack felt Ianto's cock expand then contract a few times deep inside his throat. He pulled back, letting Ianto's come slide over his tongue as he swallowed almost reflexively. A minute later, Ianto collapsed, bonelessly falling backwards against the shelf behind him. Jack cleaned his cock off, then tucked him neatly back into his trousers. He stood up slowly, holding Ianto up so that he wouldn't collapse onto the floor. Ianto was breathing hard, still gasping somewhat heavily for air.

'_You're going to be late and you can't do that to Estelle.'_

He brushed the thought aside and just stood there holding Ianto close to him. For some reason, he didn't want to leave. A completely new emotion was struggling from within the depths of his mind and he really wanted to figure out what it was. As Ianto finally seemed to be regaining some of the strength back into his body, their eyes locked and he finally understood it.

He nearly pulled away in shock, but just barely managed to hide the streak of possessiveness that shot through him. He only hoped Ianto wouldn't figure it out.

After a few minutes, Jack did pull away, but Ianto grasped him by his braces, growled and pressed their lips tightly together. Their tongues danced and caressed one another as Ianto grasped him tightly against his body. Jack broke the kiss, then smiled at Ianto, ignoring the way his own erection pressed painfully against the zip of his trousers. Grasping Ianto's arm he raised it checking the time and realised that if he and Gwen didn't leave soon, they really were going to miss the whole thing.

He pulled away somewhat reluctantly for the last and final time, brushing his lips over Ianto's again. Just as he took a step away, Ianto started to collapse back again and Jack quickly reached forward, gripping his arms and holding him steady. His lips curled softly, a regretful smile appearing.

"Are you okay Ianto? I actually _**do**_ have to leave."

Ianto nodded somewhat absently and then gripped Jack and kissed him one more time before pushing him away.

"Bloody hell Jack. Sometimes you really do completely blow my mind."

Jack leaned forward and nipped at Ianto's ear just before whispering .

"That's not all I blow."

Ianto was still staring at him dumbfounded as Jack turned away and walked out of the archives, heading towards the Hub.

As he shut the door to the archives behind him, he shuddered visibly, just barely aware of how close he had been to doing so in front of Ianto. The best that he could hope for would be that Ianto never found out about how possessive he was suddenly feeling. He wanted to lock the young man up and never let anyone else near him.

For now, he'd just have to make sure that Ianto stayed beside him, no matter what.

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TBC

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_AN: So, um, should I go into hiding now? :D reviews appreciated, as I always state. But I do understand if you don't want to leave one. Sometimes people would rather remain anonymously. :)_


	28. Chapter 28 Just when you think it’s

_AN: Okay, to be fair, I did warn that there would be angst with this chapter. For everyone who tells me not to go into hiding, I'd still write. The hiding is so I can get **more** writing done…lol. _

_Thanks go to Mama Rocks for really working with me on this chapter. She did an awesome Beta job and she made some perfect suggestions to make it even better!_

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Chapter 28 - Just when you think it's safe...

"Ianto I think I found something."

Tosh's voice cut through the light noises of the Hub and echoed up to where he was cleaning the coffee machine. He sighed heavily as he dropped the cleaning supplies and headed down to her workstation. Jack and Gwen still hadn't come back from where they had gone to earlier. As much as he wanted to deny the feeling, he was starting to get agitated. Not only did he have to deal with what felt like a million butterflies fluttering in his abdomen, but he was also starting to wonder about some of Jack's more recent actions.

He had been okay for the most part when Jack left. However, after he'd made his way back to his desk in the archives, he'd remembered a few things that caused him to pause with uncertainty. First, there was the filing cabinet with Jack's name on it. After what had just happened, he was now even more hesitant to find a way to open it. He glanced towards it again then looked away. For some reason that single old fashioned cabinet had taken on an ominous quality. He had a really terrible feeling that if he did actually find the key and get it open, he would regret knowing whatever secrets it held.

The second thing that moved through his mind was the expression on Jack's face the previous night when he'd mentioned the unusual weather patterns. Jack had looked exactly the same way when he'd walked out of the archives. And just as the door had shut, he could've sworn he'd seen the man shudder.

What really bothered him was that he couldn't figure out what it all meant.

After standing next to his desk for only a few minutes, he suddenly hadn't been able to endure remaining in the archives. It was too bloody quiet. So Instead of staying and going through the more recent additions, he'd come up to the Hub and started to research the weather patterns he'd found the previous night. After talking to Tosh about what he'd found she had volunteered to help him synchronize his results. Tosh had managed to create a file that showed how extremely odd the phenomenon actually was.

Just as he reached her station, the lights on the cog door started flashing. He turned towards it to see Jack and Gwen walking in together, so intent on their conversation that they barely acknowledged Tosh and Ianto. Gwen followed Jack into his office and Ianto's eyes narrowed with suspicion as Jack shut the door behind them. The only comfort he could find was in realising that the two of them were actually more arguing than discussing something. However, that relief was offset with the knowledge that Gwen obviously knew something that no one else on the team knew.

'_What the bloody hell?' _

He didn't get too much of a chance to wonder. Gwen left Jack's office, glancing back at him with a look on her face that Ianto knew very well by now. When she first started with Torchwood, she'd had that same look on her face, both adoring and somewhat worried.

'_It's so fucking apparent she has a crush on him! Why the hell is he messing around with me when it's so bloody obvious he wants her?'_

He scowled as he turned away from Gwen, his eyes nearly rolling from the look of puppy love on her face. He hadn't realised how much that look bothered him until that very moment. Of course, there was always the possibility that he just hadn't cared when he'd seen it before. Though he honestly couldn't figure out why the hell it bothered him now. Jack had made it quite clear that emotions were involved but he wasn't in love with Ianto.

"Ianto?"

He turned towards Tosh to see her looking at him rather concerned. Shaking his head to assure her that he was okay, he walked the rest of the way to her desk and leaned forward to find out what she had found.

An hour later, he found himself standing in front of the coffeemaker staring rather vacantly at the wall behind it as he worked the machine. He made a cup for each member of the team with barely a thought towards what they normally liked, instead serving them all the same. He was too distracted to make different types, so they would have to settle for Jack's special blend. The only changes he made were to add more sugar to Gwen's and more cream to Tosh's. For Tosh it was simply because he knew she would at least appreciate it. Gwen's because he didn't want to hear her complain.

For some reason, his mind just kept throwing the image of Jack and Gwen cosied up together in his office and the expression on Gwen's face as she walked out of there. Almost as if it was trying to point out how very wrong his relationship with Jack was. Every time Jack touched him, even if he was just brushing up against him, two sensations would be at war within him at the same time. The first, always the most powerful, would be desire, a lust so powerful that he almost couldn't see straight and nearly knocked him to his knees.

However, there was a second emotion, an underlying awareness that what he was feeling was wrong, that maybe Jack being more interested in Gwen was right...more natural. Along with that would come the certainty that Jack should be going after what he really wanted, even if it wasn't him. Ianto sighed, pulling his body up straight when realised he'd been standing in front of the coffee machine for nearly five minutes staring at the wall.

He was still somewhat absent minded as he took the cups in and began to pass them out to everyone. On that front, at least from what he could tell, nothing had changed. Owen took the cup without even glancing at him, Gwen took her cup and set it down in front of herself, and Tosh locked her eyes with Ianto's and nodded her head in thanks.

He was so distracted that it took him a few seconds to figure out what they were talking about. When he finally understood he had to hide a smile. Of all things that Torchwood had laid down in front of him, he had never in a million, million years expected them to be discussing fairies.

After hearing all of them debating, he couldn't resist contributing, even if it was only to take the piss out of them.

"I blame it on magic mushrooms." He said somewhat jovially as he set down Jack's coffee in front of him on the table.

He was fully surprised when Jack didn't even bat an eyelash before remarking back at him.

"What you do in private is none of our business."

Ianto stared at him for a second, then turned back towards the rest of the team. The best he could figure was that Jack was giving him some subtle hint to keep what they were doing after hours a secret. Which was odd considering he wasn't about to go shouting it from the rooftop. All at once everything began to click into place, making perfect sense. It was so bloody obvious that Ianto was surprised he hadn't figured it out sooner.

Jack didn't want to discourage Gwen. Ianto closed his eyes momentarily, only now realising that Jack was just trying to finish what he'd started when he'd first met Ianto. Once he'd done that, he'd have nothing holding him back. The moment he gave in and added Ianto to his list of conquests, he'd move on and start a _**real**_ relationship with her.

His thoughts drifted inward again as the team continued their debate over the picture.

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Jack winced, his back popping rather loudly as he stood up from his chair. Gwen had finally decided to leave his office and he was somewhat anxious to find Ianto and distract himself from everything he'd lost that night.

As much as he hated to admit it, he wasn't nearly as affected as he wanted to be when it came to losing Estelle. In his mind, he'd lost her many years ago. Her death, albeit painful, was nowhere near as bad as it would have been if he'd stayed with her and had her resentment cultivate to extreme levels when he failed to grow old with her. He'd cried his tears as he held her in his arms, now he just wanted to go find Ianto and celebrate being alive.

Jack sighed as he walked out of his office. He was really starting to regret not telling Ianto about his immortality. He had no idea what he was going to tell the young man when he did finally find out. He was at that point that if he didn't tell Ianto, something terrible was going to happen. Ianto would end up finding out some other way and hate him for it.

As he reached the centre of the Hub he realised that the only person around was Gwen. He turned towards her curiously.

"Have you seen Ianto?"

Gwen was rushing, trying to get her things together to leave. She glanced up at him hurriedly.

"When I came out of your office he muttered something about making sure the tourist office was locked up and took off in that direction."

She paused and looked speculatively at him.

"Did you want to talk some more Jack?"

He shook his head as he turned away and walked towards the elevator. There really was only so much of her sympathetic and puppy love looks that he could handle. He wanted to see Ianto, to spend time with someone who didn't look at him with any type of hero worship. As much as he enjoyed flirting with Gwen he knew it would never go anywhere. He was starting to trust her as a friend and employee, but that's as deep as he was willing to go. If he and Gwen started something up, she would only end up hurt. At least with Ianto he could...

Jack froze, holding his finger down on the button that would bring him to the upper level.

_'Could what? Care about...m__aybe even love?'_

His heart was thundering in his chest as his arm slowly dropped down. The doors closed quickly and noiselessly in front of him. The lift accelerated upwards and he found his knees giving out as he sat down rather ungracefully on the floor. Somehow, in the middle of all of this, he had started to let Ianto into his heart. He knew that he had to put a stop to it now, before it got to be too late. What had to remain important was the Doctor's return. Even if he did tell Ianto one of his deepest secrets, he didn't have to tell him everything. He would keep his immortality hidden and just hope Ianto never questioned him.

As the elevator slowed to a stop he jumped up hurriedly, leaning back against the wall trying to look casual. It was a waste of time considering Ianto was probably still in the tourist office, but he didn't want to be caught off guard. If he was going to remain in control of both his heart and his life, he needed to at least keep up appearances.

The elevator opened to a darkened empty hallway. He walked down the tunnel slowly, barely noticing when the doors slid shut behind him and the elevators nearly noiseless descent began. As soon as he reached the entrance that led into the tourist office, he stopped. The wall wasn't nearly as thick as he would have liked, but at this particular moment in time, he was going to use that to his advantage.

Standing there, he leant forward and focussed, trying to hear what Ianto was doing. He knew that Ianto's story of straightening up that he gave to Gwen had been his way of getting away from the Hub. Ianto always made sure everything was situated properly when he locked the office in the afternoon. There would have been no reason for him to return to reception. He had no earthly idea why Ianto had felt the need to escape, but he was going to find out.

He heard a shuffling noise and nearly jumped out his skin when something hit the wall next to the door. Just as he was about to go in and see what the hell was going on, he heard the elevator returning behind him. He turned to see Gwen walking towards him and took a few steps backwards, fading into the shadows. He didn't want to have to answer any questions from her about why he hadn't gone directly into reception and he didn't want her to start talking, thereby letting Ianto know he'd been standing there.

Either way it didn't matter. She was so intent on a conversation she was having with Rhys on her mobile that she never even glanced his way. He waited for her to walk out the back entrance that led to the parking garage before he came out and stood next to the entrance again. Ianto had gone silent, probably in response to hearing Gwen walk by, but for some reason Jack felt a stir of unease run through him.

'_Get the fuck over it! You're __too God damn old to be acting this way!'_

Reaching forward he slowly opened the door and stepped through, a lot more hesitant than he wanted to admit. His eyes flicked around the room, quickly taking in his surroundings. The place looked immaculate, more so than it normally did. The only thing that broke the picture in front of him was a shattered knickknack lying on the floor next to the door. Ianto stood stiffly in the archway that led to the storage room, his back towards Jack.

"Ianto, is everything all right? Did you get attacked by something?" Jack said, unable to remove his gaze from Ianto's tense shoulders.

Jack nearly winced as Ianto turned around quickly, his face a mask of calmness. Ianto's gaze settled somewhere on the wall above his head, his eyes never even coming close to looking directly at Jack's.

"No Sir. Everything is fine. I just dropped something and haven't had a chance to clean it up. I'll get right to it."

His voice was a lot more formal than Jack had heard in a very long time. Jack stifled a shudder that wanted to go through him. The last time he'd heard Ianto speak like that was when he'd been trying to hide the fact that Lisa had started to take over the Hub. Shrugging away his unsurety, he walked towards Ianto, grinning lasciviously. At this very moment he really wanted to take the young man down to his room, strip off his clothes, and do what he'd promised earlier that morning.

He was completely surprised when Ianto sidestepped him and walked towards the broken glass on the floor, not allowing Jack near him. Jack stared at Ianto, his eyes narrowing as the young man knelt down and began to pick up the slivers carefully and meticulously. His patience was wearing thin and the reality that Ianto had just lied to him didn't help matters. Besides that fact, Ianto was still avoiding looking at him.

"I'm sorry Sir. I'll clean this up and go home."

Jack snapped, his anger finally boiling over. It was the 'Sir' that did it. He had really started to enjoy the fact that Ianto was calling him by his name. Truthfully, the very obvious extent of Sir's within a matter of minutes was just too much to handle.

"What the hell is wrong with you Ianto?"

Ianto froze, his whole body tightening and vaguely reminding Jack of a snake that was about to strike. He saw Ianto's hand grip the broken glass in his palm hard enough to cut him and almost went over to check, when Ianto stood and threw the broken pieces back to the floor. Jack's mind focussed absurdly on the fact that they shattered into smaller pieces at the same moment that Ianto turned towards him, his eyes hard and cold.

"What could possibly be wrong with me Sir? Is it the fact that you fucking lied to me?"

Ianto stalked towards him, his hands tight fists at his sides. Jack remained where he was standing, more out of shock than anything else. If his mind had actually been working he might have been able to figure out what the hell the young man was talking about.

"Or maybe, just maybe it's the fact that you'd rather be fucking Gwen? Is that why you turned me down last night?"

Ianto paused, drawing in a deep breath of air before nearly growling.

"What's the matter Sir? Did I ruin your bloody game?"

As Ianto stopped about a yard in front of him, Jack's eyes opened wide in shock. He stared at Ianto with perplexity and amazement. He couldn't figure out where the hell the young man was getting these ideas from. On top of all of that was the fact that the last time he'd spoken to Ianto alone, they'd been fine. Now Ianto was suddenly acting like a jealous lover and Jack was too God damn shocked to be able to figure out what had changed in just under seven hours.

Jack tilted his head at Ianto, trying to work out the puzzle that was the young man's mind. Ianto was silent, staring at him almost as if waiting for an answer to the insane questions he'd asked. After another few seconds Jack gave up trying to figure Ianto out and took a couple of steps forward. He locked his gaze on Ianto's icy blue-gray irises and spoke in a voice calmer then he thought possible.

"Ianto, I have no _**idea**_ what the hell you are talking about."

Ianto scowled at him and turned away, stalking towards the doorway. Jack walked forward, catching his arm before he could go into the dark hallway. He yanked Ianto around until they were face to face, anger coursing through every part of his body.

"No Ianto. You don't get to do this! You can't just stand here and accuse me of things that make absolutely no sense, then leave before you explain yourself!"

Ianto snatched his arm away from Jack's grasp, stepping away from him again.

"What's the matter Sir? Did I ruin your plans for the night by actually seeing through your bloody game? Did I upset you by not allowing you to add me to your list of conquests?"

Jack nearly reeled away from Ianto as he spoke those words. This was beginning to get ridiculous. Not only was he not making any sense, but Ianto was acting like an entirely different person. Pushing past Ianto he began to stalk towards the elevator. Nothing about what Ianto was saying made sense and he really had no desire to work out or demand an explanation. He stopped suddenly when he realised that Ianto had already tried to run, if he chose to follow through on the action, there would be no hope for them in the future. He turned around, glaring at Ianto with more emotion showing than he liked.

"Ianto I have no fucking idea what the hell has gotten into you. You need to go home before you say something else that you're going to regret." He paused, taking a deep breath before continuing.

"Now go home."

The words came out with a harsher tone than he intended, but it was the best he could do with the amount of rage that was coursing through him. Ianto winced at his tone and Jack nearly sighed with relief. He reached towards Ianto, placed his hand comfortingly on the young man's shoulder. Ianto reached up and knocked his hand away, his face flushed.

"Why am I not fucking surprised _**Sir**_? The moment you get asked questions by anyone _**but**_ _**Gwen**_, you get angry."

Ianto scowled and turned away, stalking down the hallway. Just as he reached the door that led to the parking garage he turned his head back towards Jack, looking at him with more hatred than Jack had ever seen before.

"Fuck off Jack."

The words echoed down the hallway, causing Jack to shudder as Ianto let the door slam shut behind him.

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TBC

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_AN: So what do you think? Are the boys going to ever get this worked out? (evil grin) The next chapter is almost done, and from what Mama Rocks said, it's a great addition. Reviews/feedback appreciated, but the story will get written even if you choose not to leave one...lol. :D _

_BTW…I was amazed at the responses I have been getting. You all are so sweet! :D_

_One more thing! HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!!!!! Please have a safe and fun night!_


	29. Chapter 29 Never Underestimate the Pow

_AN: Okay, this should have been up about 9 hours ago, but my work has gone and blocked fanfic . net from our computers so I had to wait until I got home from work. Gotta admit, they do have a point...lol. Anyway, a little more angst in this chapter, and as much as I hate to say it, more in the next (which is nearly done). However, there is a **massive**_ _amount of Smut coming up soon! I promise!!! :D_

_Thanks go to mama rocks for a wonderful BETA job and for, once again (grin), questioning my dictionary!  
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Chapter 29 - Never Underestimate the Power of Alien Technology

Ianto stormed into his loft, slamming the door angrily behind him. He couldn't believe that Jack had been so bloody arrogant. Between his secrets and his confidence in Gwen, Ianto was ready to chuck it all and leave Jack bloody Harkness _**and**_ Torchwood behind. Every time he thought about the way Jack and Gwen had been sitting cosily in his office, obviously discussing something that Ianto was not privileged enough to know, his vision turned red with anger. He knew it was complete bollocks that Jack would tell him he trusted him in the morning, then treat him like he was the fucking tea-boy, as Owen so rudely claimed him to be, the same fucking night.

Ianto tore off his suit jacket and angrily threw it against the wall, not caring at all where it landed or what happened to it. The suit was one he had bought because of Jack, knowing the man appreciated how he looked in certain colours. Ianto scowled as he suddenly realised that he was so fucking irate, that he was nearly ready to take a knife to the thing and cut it to shreds, even if it was one of his more expensive suits.

'_At least that way Jack would never be able to enjoy the way it looks on me ever again!'_ he thought furiously.

Leaving the jacket on the floor he stalked towards his room, slamming the door behind him. The force was so hard that he actually heard the frame crack. He scowled as he realised that he'd probably broken it enough to cost some serious repair money.

'_Yet another thing that I can blame Captain fucking Harkness for!'_

Ianto growled ignoring the thought and looked around his room, his eyes shooting around the sparse decorations. The last time he'd been this angry he'd actually managed to tear up three or four of his books before he'd been able to stop himself. It was one of the main reasons he'd taken himself away from the living room and come to his bedroom. He needed to throw something, anything...as long as it wasn't something he was going to regret losing.

He turned, scanning the top of the wardrobe, dresser, and bed tables. Stomping towards the dresser he knocked a few things off, feeling a soft strain of relief shoot though him as they fell and shattered on the floor. He yanked open the top drawer and abruptly stopped, his eyes locking on the metal wristband he had taken from the Hub that time he'd argued with Jack.

Ianto felt the anger leave his body in a rush. Reaching down he picked up the wristband and stumbled backwards, falling rather ungracefully on his arse next to the bed. He stared at it, studying the intricate writing around the edges. There was a warning, he remembered that much, but at the moment he really didn't care what it said.

With barely any hesitation, he pulled up his arm and placed the band on it, tightly closing it around his wrist. He knew what he was doing was wrong, but something inside of him kept telling him he needed an explanation. He was tired of Jack holding back on him. From his brief experience of harbouring a life changing secret, he wasn't about to let Jack keep him in the dark. His only thought was that maybe he could find an answer. That maybe...just maybe, he would be able to read Jack's thoughts the same way he had before.

As soon as the warm metal slipped over his wrist, he drew in a deep breath of air and closed his eyelids.

He remained that way briefly, slowly releasing the air he'd just taken in. After a moment of uncertainty, he called on every bit of psychic training he'd learnt from Torchwood one and mentally opened his eyes.

He found himself standing in Jack's dark and very vacant bedroom. The blue haze lighting that always came from the use of the wristband made everything stand out in sharp relief, reflecting against the furniture and throwing out shadows that looked somewhat ominous.

'_**Empty**__...'_ his mind unhelpfully pointed out.

'_Well you were never that bloody good at the psychic training, remember? Is there anything you don't cock up?'_

Ianto sighed, his shoulders dropping as a surge of disappointment raced through his body. He only had a split second to wonder if Jack might have some type of special abilities that allowed him to focus the power of the wristband, before he felt hands grip his shoulders roughly yanking his body around. The room spun amazingly fast, nearly making him dizzy as he came face to face with Jack's startlingly narrowed blue eyes, the irises angry and darkened with lust.

Ianto gasped, shock radiating throughout him. He knew at once that this was suddenly more than he had bargained for. He'd never seen Jack as angry as he was in that moment, not even when he'd found out about Lisa. Jack scowled at him for a moment, his teeth sparkling in the hazy lighting and making Ianto shudder at how livid he actually looked.

'_Evil, that's the word you're looking for.' _he thought rather panicky, _'He looks evil and you've __**never**__ seen that before.' _

Ianto started to reach down and twist off the wristband, but Jack's fingers grasped his, tightening and holding him still.

"What the fuck are you doing Ianto? You put on that God damn wristband after everything we went through the last time!"

Jack's eyes narrowed even further as he spoke with a cold tone. So cold, in fact, that it actually frightened Ianto.

"You said you were going to put it in the fucking archives!"

He didn't give Ianto time to respond. Instead, Jack's mouth collided roughly with his, his tongue thrusting furiously into Ianto's mouth. His response was automatic, giving in and kissing Jack back with just as much prepotency. Jack didn't relinquish any semblance of control as he gripped the back of Ianto's neck with his palm, using his other hand to hold his chin steady. Ianto had enough presence of mind to realise that Jack was pushing him backwards towards the bed just as his legs hit the edge and he fell sprawling on top of it. Jack didn't hesitate at all as he covered Ianto's body with his own.

Their pelvises crashed together and Ianto groaned, lust slamming throughout him so heavily that he was almost certain he was going to come with nothing more than that brief intimate pressure. Suddenly Jack pulled back away from him and grasped his shirt ripping it open. Ianto heard a few of the buttons strike the walls, then lost track of the sound as Jack leant forward and captured one of his nipples between his teeth, biting and sucking on it.

Jack's tongue flicked over the hard nub before he pulled his mouth away and began to work his way across Ianto's chest, teeth and tongue moving roughly over his skin. His mouth latched onto the other taut nipple, rubbing it almost painfully between his teeth, his tongue flicking back and forth over the tip. Ianto's mind clouded over, every pore in his body caressed with fire. He felt a deep flicker of heat, bright as an open flame race from his chest to his groin, his cock growing painfully rigid.

Jack pulled away from him again, his hands gripping the catch on Ianto's trousers, tugging them apart and nearly breaking the zip. When Ianto's hand travelled down to stop him from doing more damage to his clothes, Jack growled at him, low and deep in his throat.

The sound of that growl suffused Ianto's body like cold water, snuffing out the fire that had been racing through him and diffusing the lust clouding his mind. He shuddered against the pressure of Jack's body on top of his, gasping for air and trying to find some level of sanity. He pushed Jack away from him with one hard shove and pulled himself backwards until he was sitting up against the headboard, his arms wrapped around his legs.

Jack sat on his heels at the end of the bed, his eyes nearly completely black with lust. Ianto shuddered again as Jack moved towards him. His hand came up pressing against Jack's chest and holding him away.

"No Sir. Don't you dare come near me! Just keep your bloody distance." he said harshly, wincing as he heard a slight tinge of fear coating his own voice.

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Jack pulled back as Ianto spoke to him, clarity and reason permeating through the anger and lust in his mind. He threw his own body backwards, sitting heavily on the end of the bed, nearly losing his balance and falling to the floor. He couldn't stop a horrified look from crossing his features as he stared at Ianto.

Ianto shuddered again and Jack almost moved to comfort him, just barely stopping himself from doing so. Even if Ianto had started this whole fucking thing by putting on that damn wristband and arguing with him over things that made absolutely no sense, he wasn't about to go against his wishes. He'd never heard fear like that in Ianto's voice, and if he was going to be honest with himself, he never wanted to hear it again.

Jack closed his eyes momentarily, drawing in a deep breath of calming air before slowly releasing it and opening them again. After the argument they'd had earlier, he had been certain that Ianto was completely lost to him. Obviously that had been a total misconception, considering the young man had gone home and decided to use the fucking wristband from hell. It was harder to concentrate considering how much the damn thing affected his libido, but he made the effort. He needed to know what was going on in Ianto's mind and that little metal band might just be the answer to his problem.

When Jack was finally able to tamper down his lust, he turned his gaze back towards Ianto. What he saw made him wince with pain. Ianto was shuddering, curled up on himself, his head buried in his knees. Jack was only mildly surprised that he hadn't made another move to take off the wristband. After all the last time he'd tried, Jack had stopped him and nearly attacked him.

Slowly, almost as if he were approaching a rabid animal, he began to move forward towards Ianto. He didn't want to frighten him again, but he couldn't just sit there and let the young man stay unhinged. On the plus side, the wristband allowed him the insight of knowing that Ianto wouldn't get more upset as long as he didn't move aggressively.

It took nearly five minutes before he found himself sitting next to Ianto. He raised his arm to wrap it around Ianto, pulling him as close as possible and ignoring the way he cringed at the touch. The entire time he'd been working his way over to Ianto, the young man's mind had been expecting anger and aggression, not a soft touch.

Ianto slowly pulled his face out of hiding and turned towards Jack, surprise written over his features. Jack smiled reassuringly at him and sighed as he leant backwards, pulling Ianto tighter into his embrace.

"Ianto…"

Jack sighed, just barely able to hide his frustration when Ianto tensed up in his arms. After a few moment's longer he tried again.

"Why were you so upset earlier?"

He stayed quiet a moment, trying to sort out Ianto's jumbled thoughts. After a little while, he finally sighed with relief. The wristband obviously wasn't meant to be used in the fashion that he was attempting to utilise, but with all of the training he'd had at the time agency he was at least able to figure it out.

He sighed as he realised what he needed to do in order to reassure the other man. He was going to have to tell Ianto everything. If he didn't Ianto would just let the aggression and frustration build until Jack was the epitome of all his problems.

"Ianto, we need to talk and it can't be with one of us wearing the wristband. Hold out your arm."

He spoke softly and somewhat reassuringly so that Ianto wouldn't begin to draw on that deep well of unworthiness he'd somehow created inside himself.

As Ianto raised his hand up, Jack intertwined their fingers and pressed a soft kiss on the back of his hand.

"Do you want me to come over or would you rather come back to the Hub?"

Ianto didn't reply vocally, but Jack understood by listening to his thoughts. Just as the young man opened his mouth to reply, Jack slipped the band off his arm.

Ianto paced back and forth next to his bed. He'd been doing so ever since he'd reappeared back in his loft. He'd also been berating himself for the better part of twenty minutes.

_'How could I have forgotten that the person wearing the fucking thing was the one whose mind got read? How could I be so fucking daft?'_

He knew the answer as soon as the questions flickered through his mind. He'd been so bloody upset that he hadn't been thinking clearly.

He knew Jack was on his way over and that one fact frightened him more than anything else did. He had no idea what the other man might have found in his mind, but he had an inkling about what he'd been thinking about. From the moment Jack placed his arm around Ianto, he'd understood a lot more about his reactions to Gwen and Jack's relationship. He was jealous because somewhere in the middle of everything they'd been doing, he started to really care about him. He knew he wasn't in love with him, but it was definitely more than lust.

Ianto stopped pacing, his body tensing as he heard his front door open. He'd obviously been so angry that he'd forgotten to lock it. He stood stock still as footsteps echoed throughout the loft, growing closer to his bedroom. The knob began to turn and Ianto sucked in a deep breath of air.

His fear turned to confusion when the door failed to open.

"Ianto?" Jack said confusedly, his voice muffled by the door.

Ianto gaped, his mouth open in shock. He knew he'd broken the door, but honestly hadn't thought it'd been that bad.

"I um...it's stuck Jack."

"It's not blocked by anything? This isn't a subtle hint that you want me to go away?"

Even through the door Ianto could tell Jack was worried. He groaned, his eyebrow rose in consternation before he could stop it. He drew in a deep breath, releasing it slowly before responding.

"No Jack."

He said somewhat softly as he walked towards it and placed his hand on the wall.

"You were right. We do need to talk. I...I was rather upset. I shut it rather hard when I came in."

Ianto sighed, frustrated. He felt like an idiot talking through the fucking door. He shook his head and moved slightly closer to the door, his nails digging into the wall as his fingers curled.

"Stand back Ianto." He heard Jack say rather loudly.

Ianto took a few steps backwards realising the absurdity of the situation. He knew Jack was going to ram against it, which made perfect sense considering the damn thing swung toward him. He vaguely started to wonder what he would've done if Jack hadn't come over, just as he heard a loud thump against the door. The wood creaked but didn't release. Just as he was about to tell Jack that he might have to call someone with some tools he heard another loud thump.

The door swung open all the way, crashing against the wall. However, Jack had used enough force to keep him propelling forward. Before Ianto could step out of the way, Jack crashed into him, knocking them both sprawling to the floor. All of the air was forced out of his body in one great surge as Jack landed heavily on top of him.

Jack groaned low and slightly pained, but Ianto was still trying recapture the air that had been forced out of him. Unfortunately the weight of Jack's body on his torso wasn't allowing him to do anything more than gasp in light shallow breaths.

Jack shifted slightly, moving his weight away from Ianto's chest, then placed his palms on either side of his head and propped his torso up. His eyes were wide with worry, obviously from the way Ianto was gasping. Ianto closed his eyes, drawing in deep breaths, filling his lungs completely several times.

"Are you all right?"

Ianto started to answer him but he absurdity of the situation struck him suddenly and he found himself laughing, loud and uncontrollably. Jack's eyebrows furrowed together and Ianto found his laughter doubling in its intensity. The more confused Jack became, the more amusement he saw in the situation. His eyes watered, tears leaking from the corners of them, trailing down and landing in his hair.

Jack pulled away from him and was on his feet in a flash. The speed at which he managed to get upright was almost scary and Ianto found his laughter cutting off just as abruptly as it had started. He was momentarily frightened until Jack offered his hand to Ianto, a cocky half smile on his lips. As soon as Ianto was on his feet Jack cupped his chin and leant forward brushing a soft kiss against his mouth. He pulled back and tilted his head at Ianto contemplatively.

"Are you ready to talk Ianto?"

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TBC

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_AN: So, out of curiosity...Did that wristband slip everyone else's mind as well? Ironically enough, even this won't be the last time we see it...lol. Reviews appreciated, but understandable if you don't want to. :D_


	30. Chapter 30 The Best Laid Plans

_AN: __Guess what! I actually have access again from work! Unfortunately, it's the beginning of the year and the health care industry, so still a delay in the posting…lol. Well, as a warning, this chapter may upset a few people because of drastic actions. Mama rocks said it wasn't that bad, but it's pretty angsty and fluffy. You'll figure out what parts are what._

_Thanks goes to my wonderful beta Mama Rocks who, as normal, did a fantastic job! _

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Chapter 30 - The Best Laid Plans

Jack smiled at Ianto, his eyes alight with pleasure. He knew they were going to have a long night of talking, but at this point he was ready to do almost anything to make sure Ianto wouldn't stay so locked up in his misconceptions. He had to somehow make him understand why he had trusted Gwen. It wasn't because he'd had a choice, it was simply because she had seen the evidence the night he hired her.

As soon as he pulled away from kissing the young man, he ran his hand down Ianto's arm and twined their fingers together. He started to lead Ianto towards the bed but the young man stopped him by holding up his hand.

"No Jack. If we get on the bed we'll only end up having sex. We need to talk and we'll _**never**_ achieve anything if we don't do it elsewhere."

Ianto's voice sounded more panicked than anything else and Jack sighed, glancing down at their linked hands. He knew the young man was right but there was a certain draw to lying down and holding Ianto close. He really liked to cuddle and Ianto made the best teddy bear. If he had to spill his soul, he wanted to at least be comfortable when doing so.

Ianto's arm raised, his hand cupping Jack's chin gently as he lifted his face until they were looking each other in the eyes. The moment their gaze met, he felt his heart stutter, his hand squeezed Ianto's tighter. Ianto's mouth twitched in an obvious attempt to smile, but Jack could tell he was too nervous to make it fully appear. In that one moment he remembered his resolution to make Ianto laugh more and realised he had made very little effort to make that come to fruition. Instead Ianto had been suffused with tension, stress, and every misdirection that Jack could throw his way.

Now that he was back at work it was even worse, considering he had to rebuild the trust the rest of the team had in him. Jack glanced regretfully towards the bed and turned back to Ianto with his eyebrows raised.

"Where do you want to talk?"

Ianto frowned momentarily. It was so quick that Jack was almost certain he'd have missed it if he hadn't been looking directly at him.

"The kitchen? I could make us some coffee?" he said, his voice low and unsure.

Jack smiled reassuringly at him and turned away from the bed, tugging lightly on Ianto's arm as he led him down the hallway. When they reached the kitchen he propelled Ianto into one of the chairs and turned towards the coffee machine. Ianto started to stand up and Jack turned back towards him pushed him back down.

"Let me Ianto. Just sit there please."

Ianto grimaced, his eyebrows shooting up with surprise. Jack began opening the cupboards and Ianto almost stood up again until Jack threw another look at him. He settled back into the chair, a doubtful look on his face.

"But...you can't make coffee."

Jack didn't turn back to him. He'd finally found the coffee beans and a grinder hidden in the cupboard above the machine. Which, when he really thought about it, made perfect sense. Ianto was way too organised sometimes.

"I can make coffee Ianto. I've been around a _**lot**_ longer than you. It may not be as good as yours, but it's also not as bad as Gwen's."

He began to measure out the coffee beans into the grinder, glancing over at Ianto as he spoke. Ianto looked worried but it was obviously more towards what damage Jack could do to his coffee machine than from what Jack was saying. After a few moments more, his words must have finally penetrated Ianto's mind because he tilted his head in confusion.

"Jack, I know you're older than me, but it can't be by more than ten years or so. That's not exactly a lot longer."

Jack sighed, covering up the sound by starting the grinder. He knew this was going to be difficult, but he'd had no idea it would be _**this**_ hard. Even in the past when he'd explained his immortality to a select few of his lovers and wives, he'd never been this nervous. Which, looking back now, he realised was highly unusual. For some strange reason, he felt as if there was so much more hanging on the balance of this conversation than he'd ever had before.

Jack released the button and quickly placed the rest of the coffee ingredients together in the machine, before turning back towards Ianto. The young man was staring down at the table in front of him, his finger tips tracing the wood grain nervously. At the sight of Ianto looking so incredibly innocent, Jack suddenly wanted to gather him up and hold him, maybe even protect him from the rest of the world. Ianto had already been through too much anguish for such a short life. Now Jack was about to put another secret on his shoulders. A secret that could very well destroy any future he may or may not have with the young man.

He knew if he told this truth, he was taking the very real chance that Ianto would never speak to him again.

Without looking back at the machine he flicked it on, then moved over to the table to take a seat next to Ianto. He reached over and grasped the hand that was still tracing across the table, wrapping their fingers together tightly. Ianto still wasn't looking at him, but he was slightly reassured when the young man curved his own fingers around Jack's.

"Ianto, I..."

His voice cracked nervously and Ianto's head shot up, looking at him with amazement and a little shock. It took him a few seconds to get his nerve back, but now Ianto's gaze never wavered from his face.

"I...I can't die." his voice was a mixture of gravelly and soft, nervousness not allowing him to speak normally.

He watched Ianto's eyes closely as he continued.

"The only reason that Gwen knows about this was because she saw proof of it the night Suzie tried to kill her. Suzie shot and killed me first in front of her."

Jack was completely stunned when Ianto tore his hand away and stood up quickly, knocking his chair into the wall just before it tipped on its side. Jack had a moment to notice the absurdity of someone in the next loft pounding back against the same wall, just before he glanced up to see Ianto glaring at him, completely livid.

"I thought you were going to tell me the truth Jack! If I had known you were going to just sit there, look me in the eye and lie I would have told you to go to hell or to fuck off again! Get the bloody hell out of my loft!"

Ianto started to walk away and Jack grasped his arm, yanking him back.

"I'm not lying Ianto! I'm trying to be honest. Please just sit back down and listen to me!"

Ianto remained standing next to him and tugged his arm out of Jack's grasp.

"Yeah right Jack. You can't bloody die! I'm sure that problem comes up in every fucking relationship in the world! Or maybe it's just the ones that have someone in them that can't tell the truth!"

Jack stared at Ianto, his mind working as fast as possible. He knew Ianto wasn't going to believe him, no matter what he said. He also knew that if he didn't do something to make Ianto believe him, the young man was going to throw him out and never speak to him again.

Reaching down, he pulled out his gun and placed the barrel under his chin, ignoring the shocked look on Ianto's face. Just as he began to pull the trigger, Ianto's hand moved so quickly that he didn't see it before it was too late. The trigger collided with Ianto's finger, stopping it from pressing all the way back.

Jack's hand went limp and Ianto yanked the gun away from him, tossing it across his kitchen. Jack watched its progress as it slid across the floor and crashed heavily against the bottom of the counter, thankfully not going off. He shifted his gaze back to Ianto, completely shocked to see tears falling slowly from his eyes.

"What the bloody hell are you thinking Jack? Were you honestly going kill yourself in front of me to try to prove a point?!?"

Ianto's voice hitched for a moment, his eyes closing and sending a couple more tears coursing down his cheeks.

He opened his eyes and fell to his knees in front of Jack, grasping his chin tightly in his palms, so tightly that it was nearly painful. Jack didn't pull away, even when the throbbing began to radiate through the back of his neck. He knew that if he had any chance with Ianto, he had to remain where he was. Ianto gasped in a couple of shallow breaths, then leant forward and pressed his forehead against Jack's.

"You can't just do that Jack. How could you be so bloody thick?" he said unevenly, with a catch in his voice.

"Even if what you say is _**true**_, and I'm not saying it is, think of what that could have done to me! I can't lose you because of something as stupid as that! You're my only sanity right now since everything else in my life has gone to complete shit! The only reason I get up in the morning is because I know you'll be there to distract me when I feel like I can't take it anymore."

Jack closed his eyes, trying to ignore the ache that had begun to creep into his mind. The only time he'd ever seen Ianto cry was when he'd lost Lisa just over a month ago and the successive times afterwards when he was still trying to heal. The intensity of how much Ianto's tears affected him was frightening and something he didn't expect. With a start, he suddenly realised that he'd almost made Ianto live through much the same emotions as when he was fighting to keep Lisa alive.

He opened his eyes and raised his hands, running his thumbs softly over Ianto's cheeks and wiping away the moisture covering them.

"I'm so sorry Ianto. I..." he drew in a deep breath and released it before continuing.

"I didn't mean to hurt you. I just needed to show you that I was telling the truth. I wasn't thinking of what effect it would have on you. I would have come back minutes later, I promise."

Ianto opened his eyes and Jack noticed they were still watery, moisture clinging to the lashes surrounding his grey-blue irises. At that moment, certain clarity stole over him, infusing his mind with the reality of their relationship. Ianto was already extremely important to him. He still wouldn't say he loved him, but he definitely _**needed**_ him, more than he could have ever realised if this hadn't happened.

Jack pulled away and stood up suddenly, pressing Ianto back into the chair he'd just vacated. Ianto stayed where he was seated as Jack began to move around the kitchen, pouring coffee for the both of them, then picking up and sitting in the chair Ianto had been in previously.

"Why don't I tell you about my life, or as much of it as I can remember? Okay Ianto?"

----------

Ianto sat quietly listening to Jack's voice as he spoke, sipping the coffee that Jack had poured for them. It wasn't nearly as good as his own, but considering the source, it was a lot better than he'd expected.

There were a lot of gaps in his story, but he could tell that Jack was describing things that he'd obviously either never spoken of before, or hadn't said in a very long time. There were a few instances when Jack would get a faraway look in his eyes, then suddenly describe something else about his life in the Boeshane Peninsula with a look of surprise on his face. Almost as if he was shocked he'd remembered it.

Ianto also knew that there were things that he was deliberately leaving out, but he was so stunned that Jack was placing this trust in him that he didn't question it. Instead he just listened avidly to everything Jack told him.

Jack talked about his brother Gray and Ianto found himself trying to picture him as a child, running around with a younger boy that looked like him. The pictures in his mind grew dark when Jack suddenly skipped to his early twenties and signing up with the Time Agency. He very nearly questioned him about it, but there was something deep inside of him that told him not to ask. Ianto smiled, amused to see Jack looking so proud and peaceful when he'd talked about being a poster boy.

Jack stood up suddenly, reaching for Ianto's cup so that he could refill it. Ianto passed it over to him, smiling softly at the idea of their obvious role reversal. As Jack poured their coffee, he continued talking.

"I'm missing two years of my memory from the time agency. They stole my memories and I have no idea why. It was like I went to sleep and woke up two years later. I tried to get them back several times and failed. Even when I became a conman..."

Jack turned towards him with a cocky grin and winked, apparently aware of the way Ianto was looking at him with shock. Ianto rolled his eyes and waved his hand, indicating that he should continue. Jack brought the cups back and placed Ianto's in front of him carefully, then sat back down in his chair.

"I tried to get answers by scamming the agency, it never worked. That's when I met the Doctor and Rose. That was the last time I tried to get my memories back."

When Jack mentioned the Doctor and Rose Tyler, Ianto's eyes opened wide. Just the name brought back images from Torchwood London and everything that had happened there. The Doctor had passed by the office he was working in when he was being led towards the Ghost Machine. Everyone in the office, including him, had gotten up and run to the door, just to try to get a better glimpse of the man that Torchwood had been built to protect England from.

However, he had actually run into the Doctor nearly an hour later, just before everything started going to hell. The Doctor had given him a look that was so strange, he still got chills whenever he remembered it.

"So that's when I started travelling with the Doctor..."

Jack's voice broke through the thoughts that were invading Ianto's mind, but Ianto held up his hand tentatively. As much as he wanted to find out about Jack's life, especially about his time with the Doctor, he knew that the other man would want to know about whatever he remembered from that day. Jack stopped talking as soon as his hand raised, his head tilted in question.

"I saw the Doctor and Jackie Tyler the day that Torchwood One fell."

He said softly, before dropping his eyes to stare at the coffee cup now cradled in his palms. He waited for a few minutes debating on drinking it, but put it down when Jack failed to respond to him. He glanced up to see Jack's complexion had gone extremely pale, his eyes open wide with astonishment. He started to stand up but Jack waved him back down and then made a motion for him to continue.

"The first time it was nothing more than the both of them being led down the hall by Yvonne Hartman and a bunch of guards. But the second time..."

Ianto paused, struggling to find the right words to explain how awkward the expression on the Doctor's face had made him feel. He gave up after a few moments, shrugging the discomfiture away and shaking his head lightly.

"I didn't speak to either of them. But when I ran into the group about an hour later, the Doctor looked at me...strangely. Almost probing..."

Ianto paused, his eyelids closing as vivid images of a hyperactive man in a brown suit and, in one of those instances actually wearing 3D glasses, flashed through his mind.

"I don't really remember a lot about that day, like most days that turn into nightmares, but I do remember...I remember the Doctor and Jackie Tyler. The only time I ever saw Rose was when Dr. Singh called up to Yvonne to say there was an intruder. One of the guys had hacked the system so we could see what was going on. I just wish we'd kept watching. I might have been able to get out with Lisa in time to save her."

Jack reached over and grasped Ianto's hand tightly in his own warm grip. When Ianto looked up, their gaze locked and he had to fight against the urge to turn away. Jack smiled at him reassuringly before speaking.

"Why don't we talk about it later?"

Ianto nodded solemnly and Jack smiled at him again, squeezing his hand for a moment then releasing it completely. Ianto sighed, momentarily feeling as if Jack had pulled away from him mentally as well as physically, but Jack began talking again and the feeling faded as quickly as it had appeared.

"When I was travelling with the Doctor and Rose, I died. I was brought back and I don't know why."

Jack stood up and walked over to where Ianto was sitting, pushing his mug out of the way and sitting on the table in front of him. He looked Ianto directly in the eyes, then ran his fingertips down the side of Ianto's face softly as he spoke.

"Ianto, I wasn't lying when I told you I couldn't die. The Doctor uses the rift to recharge the TARDIS, so Cardiff seemed like the most logical place to wile away the years. I've been waiting for over a hundred and fifty years for my timeline to coincide with the Doctor's, so that I can find out if I'll ever be normal again."

Ianto chuckled lightly and Jack started to recoil away from him. Reaching out he grasped Jack's legs, not allowing him to move away.

"Jack I wasn't laughing at you. It was _**the phrase**_."

He smiled up at Jack, his eyes twinkling with mirth as he continued.

"Even in the small amount of time we've known each other, I would never label _**you **_as normal."

Jack smirked, a light anguished groan escaping from his lips. Their eyes locked and Ianto burst out laughing, the sound escaping from him almost involuntarily. That laughter died away slowly and Ianto saw Jack's eyes change as he kept staring at him. Within moments Jack's eyes were dark and filled with desire. With another groan, this one sounding more lust induced, Jack reached forward and drew Ianto towards him, their lips locking together in a rough wet kiss.

Ianto growled, his eyelids slamming shut as he grasped Jack's braces and pulled him closer. He thrust his tongue into Jack's mouth, running the tip along his teeth and mapping out every crevice, drawn even further in by the unique flavour that coated his taste buds. After a moment Jack's tongue joined the fray, tangling wetly with his and flicking against the tip. His hands fell to Jack's hips, tugging gently as he tried to guide him forward into his lap.

Jack's palms ran down his neck, landing gently on his shoulders and pushing him backwards, breaking the kiss. Ianto couldn't stop the whimper that escaped him or the way his head tried to follow Jack's. He heard Jack sigh and his eyes flew open to look at him with confusion. Jack chuckled as Ianto grabbed him and tried to pull their mouths back together. Ianto heard another whine come from his lips as Jack pulled even further back, tilting his head minutely as if studying him.

"I...I still have a lot more to tell you Ianto. We shouldn't get distracted." Jack said softly and surely as he ran his hand downs Ianto's cheek again.

"Jack, I don't need..."

Jack shook his head lightly, interrupting his statement, then sighed heavily with a hint of regret. His thumb came up and ran around Ianto's lips gently, tracing them in a delicate caress. Ianto raised his own hand, capturing and gripping it tightly as he stared at Jack questioningly.

"I worry that if I stop, I'll never get another chance to tell you everything."

Ianto chuckled and squeezed Jack's hand tighter momentarily, then loosened his grip again before speaking.

"Jack, what I was going to say is that I...I don't need to hear everything. You've already told me more than I would have ever expected, especially considering that a little over a month ago, I thought you'd never trust me again. It's nearly three in the morning and I'm not sure I could stay awake for a hundred and fifty year history lesson."

"Ianto, there's only one more thing I want you to know..."

This time, it was Jack that broke off as Ianto ran his hand along Jack's thigh slowly, stopping a few millimetres from his goal. He could see Jack's cock encased within his trousers, half-hard and slightly throbbing, but Jack had begun to tense up the closer he got to it. He started to pull his hand back but Jack shook his head minutely and he left it where it was.

"I think you need to know that the woman we lost tonight, Estelle? I was in love with her a long, long time ago. I couldn't stay with her. She would've found out about...well, for lack of better words, my immortality."

Ianto frowned and stood up quickly and Jack flinched visibly as if he was afraid Ianto was going to walk away from him. Instead he wrapped his arms tightly around Jack in a comforting embrace. Jack hesitated momentarily, obviously surprised, then slowly brought his own arms up to wrap around Ianto's waist.

"I'm so sorry Jack." He said in a whisper, leaning in to speak softly in his ear.

He pulled back and almost chuckled at the look of unrestrained shock on Jack's face. Before Jack could respond to him, or say something else that would lead to another few hours of talking, he kissed him slowly. He lingered for a moment, his mouth parted slightly, trying to memorise the way Jack's lips felt against his, then pulled Jack's lower lip between both of his and sucked lightly on it.

Jack moaned, gripping Ianto tighter and tugging his body between his legs, pressing their pelvises flush against one another. This time it was Ianto that pulled away before Jack could even deepen the kiss. He smiled solicitously, then took a step backwards and held out his hand to Jack in offering.

"Can we go to bed now Jack? We're going to need at least a few hours of sleep in order to focus on the fairies tomorrow and get this mission over with."

Jack stood up, ignoring Ianto's hand in favour of unbuttoning his shirt and dropping it casually on top of the table. He began walking towards the bedroom, stripping off his undershirt as he walked. Ianto laughed low, his heart thundering in his chest as Jack turned back towards him and raised his eyebrows in question.

"You coming?"

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TBC

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_AN: You know what's up next don't ya? _

_Reviews appreciated, but not a necessity! I completely understand if you just like reading and don't want to comment. Sometimes you just can't. :D_


	31. Chapter 31 The Trigger Effect

_AN:__ Sorry about the long delay between chapters! First I had to deal with a pinched nerve in my neck (which cut my typing speed nearly in half) __**and**__ I had Mama Rocks look over the chapter several times because I changed a few things between her corrections._

_I gotta say thanks to Mama Rocks who is incredibly patient with me and is such an __**immense**__ help on this chapter as well as doing such a great Beta job!_

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Chapter 31 - The Trigger Effect

The speed at which Ianto appeared behind Jack would have been almost frightening in its intensity if he hadn't been expecting it. He was still momentarily surprised when Ianto's hands came down on his shoulders gripping him tightly and flipping him around to push him against the wall. Jack gasped as Ianto leant forward, slowly running his tongue along his clavicle, nipping and sucking the soft skin into his mouth. He groaned loudly as Ianto ran strong fingers down his chest, massaging his muscles before flicking over his nipples, tweaking and pinching them.

Ianto growled as Jack raised his hands, tangling them in his hair and pulling him closer. He could feel Ianto's teeth, scraping against his skin lightly just barely brushing against his neck, and he thrust his hips forward, crying out unintelligibly as his hard cock pressed into the young man's hip.

Just as Ianto dropped his hand to the catch on his trousers, Jack captured his wrist, stopping him from opening them. Ianto pulled away, his eyes narrowing as he stared at him questioningly, his fingers grazing lightly against Jack's cloth covered erection with every deep breath he took. Jack shook his head minutely, before flipping Ianto around and pushing him heavily against the wall, pressing their bodies flush against one another. He captured both of Ianto's wrists in one of his hands and raised them above his head, holding them steadily and tightly within his grasp. He thrust his hips forward and Ianto groaned when their erections rubbed together, trapped and straining as they glided against one another.

Leaning forward, Jack ghosted his lips over Ianto's, suckling gently on the bottom one before pulling away and smiling wickedly.

"We need to even the score Ianto. I guarantee that tonight, you're going to lose your clothes _**long**_ before I shed mine."

Ianto's eyebrows rose and he chuckled lightly, the movement causing Jack to grunt loudly as their bodies rubbed delectably together. Taking advantage of Ianto's position, Jack ran his other hand across the young man's jaw, pausing to run the tips of his fingers along his lips. Ianto's tongue snaked out, flicking over the ends of them.

Jack watched, unable to turn his eyes away as Ianto leaned forward, drawing them into the warm cavern of his mouth and sucking tenderly. He felt Ianto's tongue circle his fingers and rocked his hips against the young man's, hard and fast, the movement completely involuntary. The fact that it was unintentional didn't matter, the moment his hips snapped forward, Ianto growled, his teeth biting down lightly on the tips of Jack's fingers.

Jack's breath left his lungs in a tortured gasp, his heart beginning to race as he pulled his hand away from Ianto's mouth hurriedly, bringing it to the bottom of the young man's undershirt and tugging the cloth up out of the way. He tucked the shirt around Ianto's neck and ran his palms across the young man's chest, stopping only long enough to flick one of his fingernails over each pebbled nipple as soon as he encountered them. Jack watched Ianto's face carefully, taking in every aspect of his expression and every sound that fell from his parted lips. Ianto's eyes slammed shut as Jack's fingers ran along his stomach, the tip of his finger dipping into his navel and teasing delicately at the tiny indent.

Jack dropped his hand further and gently closed his fingers over Ianto's throbbing erection, cupping and slowly stroking it as it strained against the zip of his trousers. Ianto gasped harshly, his chest heaving as he tried to draw in air, his nostrils flaring with every breath he took. He could feel Ianto's hands flexing and releasing, mirroring his movements on the young man's cock and Jack licked his lips, his mouth watering with anticipation. More than anything, Jack needed to fuck Ianto, but the thought of taking the hard pulsing flesh he was currently caressing into his mouth was quickly becoming just as important.

After a torturous moment longer, Jack released Ianto's wrists and dropped to his knees. Before Ianto could stop him, he leant forward and ran his mouth over the cloth covered cock, nipping and biting at it through the heavy material. Ianto groaned as Jack raised his hands and gripped his thighs, running his fingernails up and down, nearly shivering at the sound it made. At first, Ianto's hands remained where they were when Jack had released him. The moment Jack's mouth began to tongue him through his trousers, Ianto's palms jerked downwards landing on the top of Jack's head, gripping his hair tightly between his fingers.

His hips thrust forward as Jack reached up to hastily undo the clasp and zip, yanking the garment down the moment he had them undone. Once he had divulged Ianto of his trousers, he stood up swiftly only to have to fight back laughter at the sight before him. Ianto was all but collapsed against the wall, his dishevelled dress shirt gaping open, undershirt rumpled and coming lose from where Jack had secured it as his hard cock strained and throbbed inside his boxer briefs.

Briefly Jack tried to think of a time when he had seen anyone look as debauched as Ianto did in that moment. He shook his head minutely, dispersing the thought. He was having a hard time imagining any of his previous lovers. To be perfectly honest, he was much more inclined to pay attention to the glorious form before him, instead of what he had lost.

Pressing his body against Ianto's he leant forward and drew in a deep breath of air, smiling absently as he noticed a heavy smell of arousal and a deeper more subtle scent of pheromones coating the young man's body. After over a hundred and fifty years on earth only one other lover had a pheromone level developed enough that he was actually able to detect it. That lover had been female, a one night affair and her potency had been nowhere near Ianto's.

For a moment, Jack's mind actually drifted away in thought as he wondered how he had managed to walk away from the young man the night he'd first met him. He'd known how aroused Ianto was from the instant he'd introduced himself as _"Jones, Ianto Jones"_ and he'd had to use every amount of self control he had inside of him to restrain himself from just taking Ianto and fucking him against a tree. He drew in several more deep breaths, thinking back and remembering how that smell had been coming off him in waves.

Jack sighed and licked his lips as he focused back on the present. When he pulled away he found Ianto looking at him oddly, his head tilted to the side with curiosity clearly evident in his expression.

"What are you doing Jack?"

Jack pulled Ianto away from the wall and manoeuvred his body around, pressing him backwards towards the bedroom. As soon as Ianto's legs were against the bed he leant forward again and ran his tongue along Ianto's throat, sighing with pleasure at the flavour of the young man's skin exploding across his taste buds. He pulled away again, grinning at Ianto while he tugged both of his shirts over his head and tossed them unheedingly onto the floor. It was only then that he finally answered the question.

"I can smell and taste your arousal Ianto. Your pheromones may not be as strong as mine, but you do have them. And..."

He paused for a moment, leaning in again to draw in a deep breath of air and flicking his tongue out to run along Ianto's chin. He moved up, capturing the young man's lips in a deep kiss, just long enough for the taste of Ianto's mouth to coat his own before pulling back and continuing.

"...your flavour is so fucking incredible Ianto. It's almost enough to make me want to drown in it."

Jack pressed Ianto backwards until he landed heavily on the bed, then gripped the waistband of his boxer briefs, pulling them down over his hips. Ianto's erection sprang free, slapping heavily against his abdomen as Jack reached forward to run his fingertips over the glans of the young man's cock. He smiled seductively, using the tip of his thumb to trace a vein down to the base before wrapping his fingers around the hot, thick length of it and squeezing gently.

Ianto shuddered, arching into Jack's touch as he began thrusting into the tight grip and moaning steadily. The sound was enough to drive through Jack, making him drop to his knees between Ianto's thighs. Jack leant forward, rolling his tongue over the head of Ianto's cock before sucking it into his mouth and lapping at the small hole almost reverently. Ianto's cock was already leaking heavily and the taste of his precome was nearly enough to drive Jack completely out of his mind. He brought his other hand up to cup Ianto's balls between his fingers, rolling and squeezing them tenderly as he allowed his fingers to press against his perineum.

He was so intent on what he was doing that he barely heard Ianto as he gasped and arched. It was only as Ianto's cock began to be forced further into his mouth that he realised just how out of control the young man was. Jack pulled away, releasing him completely with one more practiced sweep of his tongue along the end of his cock. Ianto groaned in frustration, his arms reaching towards him to pull him back and Jack took a step out of the way, a teasing smile on his lips.

"Jack..." Ianto whimpered suddenly, a pleading tone to his voice.

Jack laughed lightly, licking his lips and sighing with gratification when Ianto's flavour exploded throughout his mouth, stronger and much more potent than before. Moving forward he covered Ianto's body with his own, his legs hanging uncomfortably over the edge of the bed. He started to swing sideways and Ianto growled as his arms encircled Jack's waist, holding him close, not allowing him to move. Jack sighed resignedly, still trying to shift to the side as he realised Ianto wasn't going to allow him to escape again.

"Is a blow job all you really want Ianto? Because I _**was**_ planning on doing so much more."

He thrust his hips rather ungracefully into Ianto's as he spoke, unable to control it the way he could have had he been better positioned. He wasn't quite sure, but he figured it was the best he could do to make the young man aware of his intentions.

Ianto released him quickly, his teeth worrying his lower lip as he stared at Jack with unrestrained lust. He grasped Jack's hips and pressed against him, allowing him to move until he was lying next to him. As Jack shifted to get more comfortable, Ianto spoke suddenly, his voice hoarse with need and a strain of suspicion.

"What _**exactly**_ do you have planned Jack?"

Jack grinned, running the tips of his fingers down Ianto's chest again, mapping out the contours of his muscles and playing with the sparse hair that trailed down it.

"Well, that really depends on _**you**_ Ianto. Are you willing to ask for what you want?"

Ianto sighed, reaching over to undo the catch on Jack's trousers and tried to yank them over his hips. Jack didn't move to help him, knowing that if he allowed Ianto to continue, he'd never hear what he wanted to come from the young man's lips. After struggling against Jack's unwilling movements Ianto finally groaned in defeat.

"Bloody hell Jack! Would you _**please**_ just get undressed and fuck me?"

The moment the words came from Ianto, Jack stood up and pulled off the rest of his clothes in a frenzied rush. He saw Ianto scoot back against the bed, getting more comfortable as he watched Jack avidly. Jack smirked at him sinfully as he joined him on the bed, covering Ianto's body fully with his own and thrusting down so that their erections rubbed along one another, the heavily leaking heads providing an adequate amount of lubrication to allow them to slide smoothly. The slick feeling was just enough to remind Jack that he'd forgotten to grab the lube from his trousers. He started to pull away and Ianto grasped him tightly not allowing him to escape again.

"Ianto, I need to get the lube. I can't fuck you unless I prepare you. I don't want to hurt you."

Ianto didn't say anything just quickly reached over to his bedside table, opening the drawer and pulling out a small box. Jack nearly laughed aloud when it was thrust into his hands and he read the label. He hadn't picked up the normal lube that most people used for regular sex. Instead Ianto had managed to find a box of _Astroglide Anal Shooters_. Jack gazed at Ianto with both shock and surprise evident on his face, allowing his laughter to finally break free from his lips when Ianto's face began to flush bright red. He was still marvelling in the fact that the young man was so adept at managing to astonish him in a way that no one else had ever done before, when he leant forward and pressed a soft slow kiss against his lips.

He pulled back after a moment, taking a second to wonder how long ago Ianto had purchased the lube and then thrust the thoughts aside as he ripped open the box and pulled out a couple of the small packets. He threw the box carelessly back onto Ianto's bedside table and snapped open one of the tubes, drizzling the cool liquid on his palm. He could tell Ianto was slightly nervous and he fully intended to make the young man remember this night for the rest of his life. Jack was still chuckling lightly as he reached down and wrapped his slick palm around the young man's cock, slowly pumping it up and down.

Ianto gasped, his hands fisting tight in the bed sheets.

"Oh God, Jack no..."

It was a whimper more than anything else and Jack smirked as Ianto's hips began to thrust into his slick fist.

Jack leant forward, placing his mouth at Ianto's ear, making certain to blow in it as he spoke softly.

"What Ianto? Were you thinking I was going to do something else?"

Ianto's eyes flew open in shock at his words and Jack chuckled again, his hand moving a little quicker. He tightened his grip and flicked his thumb over the glans of Ianto's cock slowly, rubbing the slick gel into the soft skin and Ianto groaned again, his head beginning to thrash back and forth. Just as he was about to give in and give the young man what he knew he wanted, Ianto cried out and jerked his hips backwards. Jack nearly jumped when Ianto spoke suddenly, his voice more of a growl than anything else.

"God Jack. I want to come with you inside me. Not from a bloody hand job!"

Jack kept moving his hand as he leant forward and nipped at Ianto's ear, whispering in it.

"You know what you have to do to get that, remember?"

He squeezed Ianto's cock giving one long hard stroke as he finished talking and Ianto nearly screamed. Ianto spread his legs, his knees bent and falling open as he thrust into Jack's slick palm, his hands twisting the bed sheets so violently that they began to come loose. Jack took advantage of the position, using his other hand to trail his fingers through the lube coating Ianto's cock and running them down to his puckered opening. He pressed gently with the tip of one, not letting more than the very end of it to enter the tight ring.

"Oh fuck, oh God! _**Please**_ Jack! I need you to fuck me. _**Please**_!"

Ianto cried out, a pleading tone to his voice as he thrashed his head back and forth trying to thrust back onto Jack's finger at the same time.

It was exactly what Jack had been waiting to hear. He released Ianto's erection abruptly, sinking the rest of his finger completely into Ianto's body down to the knuckle.

----------

As Jack slid his finger slowly into Ianto's body, he began to thrust backwards. He knew his behaviour was extremely wanton and needy but it felt like he'd been waiting for Jack to fuck him for an eternity. If he didn't do it soon Ianto was going to lose his bloody mind.

Jack smiled cockily as he added another finger, curling them both in a come hither motion just enough to rub gently over his prostate. His other hand caressed Ianto's abdomen lightly, brushing the side of his hard weeping cock every now and again, causing him to buck his hips upwards. Ianto was groaning heavily his eyes half lidded with arousal. Just when he felt like he was going to come from the anticipation alone, another finger was added. They scissored inside his body slowly, pressing against his prostate with every withdrawal and impale.

After another few minutes, Jack pulled his fingers completely out of him and began kissing and licking his way up Ianto's torso. Ianto growled low in his throat as Jack settled between his thighs. Jack reached down and grasped Ianto behind the knees, placing his calves on his shoulders. He used one arm to hold Ianto in position and grasped his cock with the other, placing the head at Ianto's puckered opening. Just as Ianto began to believe Jack was going to enter him, Jack grabbed the second pack of lube that he'd pulled out and poured it over his hand, quickly coating his cock. As soon as he was finished, he tossed the small tube over his shoulder. He lined up the glans of his cock again and began to press forward, gradually entering him as Ianto clenched his teeth around his lower lip, a soft groan escaping from his mouth.

The head of Jack's cock suddenly entered his body and Ianto felt himself go tense as a sharp stab of pain shot through him. Jack pressed in a little bit further and Ianto started to arch his hips away pulling back from the pressure.

Abruptly, Jack allowed Ianto's legs to drop from his shoulders. Ianto was beginning to gasp with pain when Jack leant forward and began whispering in his ear. The sound was rough and coated with worry making Ianto freeze as he listened to Jack's voice.

"Relax Ianto. Open yourself up to me. The pain will go away when you do."

Ianto closed his eyes and drew in a deep breath of air as he concentrated on relaxing all of his muscles. After a few moments longer, the pain flowed out of his body, leaving behind a feeling he couldn't describe. He heard Jack groan softly and reached up to wrap his arms around his waist only to feel him shivering somewhat uncontrollably.

"Jack...look at me." Ianto said quietly.

Jack's head pulled away from him, their eyes locking. Ianto nodded at him, struggling to hold Jack's shaking body steady, still trying to figure out exactly what was wrong with him. He knew Jack wasn't going to keep going unless Ianto gave him some sort of indication that he was ready, but even after giving him the okay, Jack still didn't press forward.

Reaching down he grasped Jack's buttocks firmly in his palms and pulled his hips forward. There was one more slight spasm of pain, but it disappeared as quickly as it came. He heard Jack gasp and threw his own head back, a deep groan spilling from his lips. Once Jack's cock was seated firmly inside of him he dropped his hands back to the sheets and gripped them forcefully. Jack moved his own hands down and loosened his grip from them. He raised Ianto's hands above his head and intertwined their fingers tightly.

At first Jack didn't move, instead staying stock still as if giving Ianto time to adjust to the invasion. Ianto sighed and shifted his hips further up, allowing Jack's cock to sink even deeper inside of his body. The same feeling he'd had minutes earlier came back, growing in its intensity. He struggled momentarily, still trying to figure out what it was, but it was only when Jack's hips drew back minutely and thrust forward that he was finally able to understand it.

Jack began to slide slowly in and out of his body, each thrust angled just perfectly for the head of his cock to brush against Ianto's prostate. The movement felt like waves of the ocean, his body clenching down on the invasion, the tight ring of muscle able to feel every ridge and dip of the cock gliding in and out of him. He moaned softly, his eyes closing as he took in the wonder of the sensation and began to cant his hips to match Jack's rhythm. His legs came up to wrap around Jack's waist, holding him close.

Jack surrounded him, his cock rigid and filling him so completely that every press of his hips caused Ianto to gasp for air. It seemed to go on forever until Ianto was almost certain that Jack had been thrusting inside of him for years. The minutes flew by but Jack never once increased his pace. Ianto arched his head back in pleasure, his eyes squeezed tightly shut. If only he had recognized what he'd been missing, the way that Jack was moving and the feeling of being so full...so open to the other man. If he'd known Jack could make him feel this way he might have bent over Jack's desk and begged him to fuck him sooner. Hell, he might have let him take him the night he'd met him, right there in the woods against a tree.

After what seemed like hours of blissful rocking Ianto heard Jack's voice whispering to him.

"Ianto open your eyes. Look at me."

The words were soft, filled with more emotion then he'd ever heard in Jack's voice before. He opened his eyelids slowly, grey blue eyes locking on his own cerulean depths as pleasure rippled throughout his body. Jack's fingers tightened in his, their hands intertwined just as intimately as their bodies. He kept his gaze locked on Jack's, the feeling of gentle swaying drawing him over the edge in the slowness of the thrusts.

"Jack..." he whimpered as his heart thundered inside of his chest.

"Oh God...please Jack..."

Ianto would've balked at the neediness in his voice but he was too immersed in the pleasure of this act. The very idea of submission to the man above him, the one who continued thrusting in and out of him at a leisurely pace, overwhelmed him. His body began to tense, his mind clouded with rapture, as the coiling grew stronger and stronger within his abdomen. He had no idea what was going to happen next, the only thing he knew was that it was going to be explosive. Heat suffused him, his cock straining against Jack's stomach, his frenulum rubbing deliciously against the muscled abs with just enough pressure to bring the fire racing through him to a raging inferno.

Ianto's sight began to grow foggy, his heart feeling like it was beating in tandem with their movements. Just as he began to think he was going to die from the sheer intensity of this moment, Jack's voice drifted to him. His rough tones encased soft words that met his ears in a frenzied haze.

"I need you to come Ianto…for me…"

White light exploded throughout him, his mind suddenly blank of everything but the sound of Jack's voice and the feel of his cock as it slid in and out of his body. The coiling finally tightened to the breaking point, shattering within him. He shuddered as come erupted from him, coating their abdomens with fiery liquid heat. His cock throbbed again and again, the feeling exploding out of him as his body clenched tightly around Jack. He heard his own voice whimpering and moaning, barely able to comprehend the sounds as anything he was remotely capable of making.

Jack's grip tightened on his hands as he buried his cock deep inside of Ianto, letting the pleasure move over his body. It took him a few minutes to recover, but the moment he did Jack pulled completely out and then thrust back into him again slowly.

Working his hands free, Ianto reached up and ran his fingers through the short strands of Jack's hair. Jack's arms wrapped around his shoulders, his nails digging almost painfully into the muscles as he gripped him tightly, using Ianto's shoulders to guide his thrusts in and out of his body.

He stared at Jack's face trying to memorise the way it looked in that moment. As Jack pulled out again his hips seemed to stutter almost fighting the movement, the head of his erection rubbing slowly against Ianto's prostate. The action sent an electric jolt throbbing through Ianto's cock, which had begun to fade, thickening and hardening it again. Jack dropped his mouth and began to nip at Ianto's ear as he moved, before working his way down.

He groaned as Jack pulled back again, the feeling of his body closing at the withdrawal. Jack's head was buried in his neck, licking his clavicle as he sucked the skin deep into his mouth and bit it softly. Jack moaned against him and Ianto gasped as he suddenly thrust hard and fast back into him.

"Oh God Jack, what..." he sputtered out barely able to form the words, "...what are you doing?"

Jack pulled away from his neck, staring at Ianto as he pulled out again, his hips scarcely making it halfway before thrusting back in hard. Their eyes clashed and Jack released a soft tortured sigh before pulling his hips back again, his body tense and shuddering as he thrust back in even harder and faster than the last time. He leant forward nipping at Ianto's ear as he blew softly in it and spoke with a low coarse voice.

"Coming Ianto..."

Jack managed to pull back once more, but this time Ianto felt his cock throb inside of him, a burst of hot semen spurting against his prostate. His hips canted upwards, hard and fast, pushing Jack deeper into him then he'd ever anticipated. Ianto felt a sharp spasm go through him as he came again, nowhere near as powerful as he had less than five minutes before, but enough to make him cry out Jack's name with a fervent growl.

Jack seemed to curl up around him, his lips capturing Ianto's in a forceful wet kiss that seemed to encompass everything inside of him. He stayed buried inside Ianto's body, his cock spasming and coating his insides with what felt like liquid fire. Ianto kissed him back with just as much energy, gripping Jack's hair so tightly he knew he had to be hurting him.

After a moment longer, Jack broke the kiss and suddenly collapsed, his weight resting heavily on top of him. Ianto felt his legs drop from Jack's waist, falling weightily onto the bed on either side of Jack's hips as he drew in deep ragged breaths of air. Jack's cock, now almost completely soft, slipped out of him and he groaned at the sudden empty feeling inside of him. Jack started to shift off him and Ianto found enough strength in him to raise his arms and wrap them tightly around the other man, stopping him from moving away.

"Ianto, I'm not leaving. I just need to get us cleaned up."

Jack said softly, his fingers coming up to run the tips down Ianto's cheek.

"No Jack, not yet. Please...just stay here for a minute."

Jack propped himself with his hands looking down at Ianto with a slight half smile.

"Ianto, you're going to regret it if we end up glued together."

Ianto shook his head minutely, leaning up to brush his lips softly against Jack's before falling back and smiling sedately at him. He was obviously worn out, considering he couldn't even keep his body propped up.

"No Jack. I like you where you are."

Jack sighed and dropped his body on top of Ianto's, nuzzling his neck and drawing in deep breaths of air. Ianto almost laughed when he realised that Jack was probably still smelling the pheromones he'd mentioned earlier. The only thing stopping he laughter was the fact that exhaustion was making its way quickly throughout his body, making him drift into a semiconscious state.

Just as he was about to drift off completely he heard Jack whisper something in his ear. He struggled against the heaviness invading his limbs as he spoke with a sleep leaden voice.

"What?"

----------

Jack gripped Ianto's chin, tilting his head towards his own and brushing their lips over one another's. Ianto's eyebrows drew together, forming a worry line between them and Jack's finger smoothed over it, wiping it away.

"Ianto, there's one more thing I think you should know before tomorrow morning catches up with us and makes it hard to say."

Ianto sighed with resignation, his eyes growing even more concerned. He was beginning to wake up and that was the last thing that Jack wanted at that moment. What he needed to tell Ianto would be much easier if he took the chance that the young man wouldn't remember it.

"I..."

Ianto's eyes widened with shock and Jack knew immediately what was racing through his mind. He shook his head, trying to get Ianto's mind away from where it was obviously headed.

"No Ianto, I'm not about to tell you I love you. But..." he cupped Ianto's chin in his palm, caressing his cheek with his fingers.

"...I do _**need**_ you Ianto. More than I ever thought possible."

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TBC

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_AN:__For those of you who asked about updates before this chapter was posted, I try to keep my profile up to date on the progress of this story. Oh and for the one who asked, my kitty is all better. Can't even tell the furry rug rat was near death a couple of months ago!_

_So, comments? Questions? You don't have to if you don't want to, but they are always appreciated and responded to!_


	32. Chapter 32 Reflections

_AN: I want to thank Mama Rocks again for helping me so much with this chapter and doing such a great Beta job. She helped straighten out a few things that were really bothering me. :)_

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Chapter 32 – Reflections

_It was happening again..._

_Ianto stood in the elevator trying to ignore the tears that fell continually from his eyes. He had no idea how he'd managed to go back in time and end up living through this hellish nightmare all over again. All he could figure out was that he was bound to repeat this night over and over until he finally got it right. Perhaps one of these times he would actually be able to save Lisa. Or maybe, just _**possibly**_, he might actually be able to fix it all without hurting Jack as much as he had the first time they'd lived through it._

_He was never going to get that option though. Whatever demon or alien that was holding him hostage and insisting he relive this __abominable__ time over, never gave him the chance to take it back. Every single time the ordeal started over, it would be with him walking towards the elevator. It was always _**after**_ the damage had already been done, ultimately when he'd already managed to destroy something between himself and Jack that had just barely begun to grow. Instead of receiving absolution, the look on Jack's face when he said he had nothing left to lose would haunt him for the rest of his wretched life. _

_He shook his head, ridding himself of his thoughts. He needed to focus on saving Lisa. That was what was important. It was so bloody obviously the reason he had to relive this hell. If it had been about saving what he had with Jack, the monster doing this would have taken him further back in time. _

_It might have taken him longer than he expected, but he finally found the answer he'd been looking for._

_Standing in the elevator, he cast his gaze downward. His hands hung limply to his sides as he gripped a gun loosely with his fingers. Ianto drew in a deep breath, trying to remember what was supposed to occur next. That was another thing that happened each time he relived these few hours. Every occasion he started over, it never left him with the memory of the paths he'd taken before, only the heinous endings and what had happened the very first time. _

_He__ still didn't want to admit that Jack was right, not after fighting to keep Lisa alive for so long. It seemed completely ironic that Jack would order him to kill her, when he himself was an obvious avid believer of doing the right thing. After all those months trying to keep her alive, trying to save her, he just couldn't see the right direction leading to her death. _

_The elevator came to an abrupt halt and he moved slowly, pointing the gun as he exited it. He didn't want to have to defend himself, but he knew that until he was actually able to get Lisa to remember who she was, he was vulnerable._

_The moment he entered the Hub he knew something was wrong. He glanced around hurriedly trying to figure out what else could possibly be amiss, seeing nothing more than the mess that was left behind when they'd escaped on the invisible lift. There was a pool of blood where Lisa had been attacked by Myfanwy, but she was nowhere to be seen. Either Myfanwy hadn't managed to kill her or on this occasion her corpse was ensconced somewhere up in the pteranodons nest. _

_In his heart, he figured that Myfanwy was probably chewing on her dead body, enjoying the meal that Jack had so willingly provided for her. It would only be fitting since he knew that was how the last time had ended._

_He turned quickly, intent on going up and collecting her before Myfanwy could desecrate her any further and suddenly stopped as his gaze was drawn to a couple of pizza boxes scattered haphazardly along the edge of the pool. He walked over to them and knelt down, pulling them out of the water with the tips of his fingers. Something about those boxes was bothering him and he couldn't figure out exactly what it was. After a few seconds longer, he grimaced irately as a thought flickered through his mind._

'Damn it! They forgot the bloody coleslaw!'

_He knew that wasn't the answer, but with everything that was currently going on, he just couldn't focus enough to figure it out. There was still something troubling him and it seemed to be centred on how closely this occasion was beginning to reflect what had happened the first time he'd gone through this night. _

_After a few minutes longer, he shook his head and stood up, beginning to walk towards the pathway that would lead to Myfanwy's nest. He needed to get to Lisa's body and bring it down before the pteranodon did any more damage to it. Preferably before the rest of the team came to finish her off. If he could show them her dead body, maybe then Jack would be able to look past the situation and understand why he had betrayed them. _

_Suddenly he froze and turned back towards the pizza boxes, a sharp streak of dread slamming throughout his mind. He couldn't believe he'd been so fucking blind to not have figured out why he was so unsettled by them. _

'Where the bloody hell is the Annie?'

_The moment the thought ran through his head, he knew the answer. _

_His hand tightened on the butt of the gun as he took off towards the lower level. He had no idea when she had arrived, but perhaps this time he wouldn't be too late to save her. Maybe, just maybe, he could do one thing right today and actually save a life, instead of be an accomplice to a murderer._

_It was only as he was running that he finally realised the woman he loved, the person he'd fought to keep alive for nearly __five months was truly dead. She had been replaced by a cold blooded killer who regarded humans as nothing but expendable tools, only in need of upgrades to make them just like her. Lisa was nothing more than a memory, that no matter how much he fought against and no matter how many times he had to relive, he could no longer keep alive._

_Jack had been right after all. Even now, as he was running, he realised how much he was going to lose if Lisa managed to kill another innocent human being again. _

_The moment he reached Lisa's room his eyes flicked towards her dead body on the floor, then turned away. His gaze instead shifted towards the corner, knowing what was coming, still trying to catch his breath from his sprint. He stared at the darkened corner, dread welling up inside his chest. _

_The rest of the team would be there soon and they would deal with the girl now __moving slowly out of the shadows. As the figure stepped forward in a quick marching stride he heard a horrified gasp come from his lips. The person coming towards him, the one whose emotions were completely devoid on their face wasn't Annie..._

_...i__t was Jack._

_Ianto's mouth dropped open as he began to scream._

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_

Jack opened his eyes, bolting out of the bed as he heard Ianto yell out. He stood there silently for a few seconds trying to get his sleep addled mind to focus on his surroundings, then turned around to look at Ianto. He was still asleep, even after Jack's abrupt exit, however, that didn't worry him. What did bother him was the way Ianto was curled up in a tight foetal position and the frightened whimpers that were still coming from the young man's mouth.

After what had happened a few hours before, he couldn't stand to see Ianto so distraught. He dropped down quickly next to the young man's head and ran his fingers through his hair in a comforting gesture.

"It's okay Ianto. I'm here...you're safe" he whispered softly, still caressing Ianto's forehead.

Ianto didn't wake up, but his whimpers did fade away as he relaxed further into the bed. Jack chuckled under his breath as Ianto tilted into his hand, almost like a cat leaning in to be stroked. It wouldn't have surprised him at all if Ianto started purring in that moment.

As soon as Ianto had settled down, Jack shifted backwards, propping himself up on his feet looking at the young man with speculation. He couldn't stop the grimace that appeared on his lips as he realised what Ianto was probably dreaming about. He also had absolutely no doubts that the reason Ianto was currently having this nightmare was because of the stunt he had pulled earlier when he'd been trying to prove a point to the young man.

After a moment Jack leaned in again to run his fingers lightly along Ianto's jaw line as he thought about the way he'd acted earlier. After Ianto had passed out he'd managed to get out of bed and get them both cleaned up, but when the moment came for him to leave, he hadn't been able to. Instead he'd taken one look at the young man sleeping peacefully and had decided he'd much rather spend the night next to him.

Even if it did lead to an uncomfortable morning after scene.

Jack sighed heavily as he stood up and glanced at the clock. It was already six in the morning and Ianto normally turned up at work around half past seven. If was going to leave, he knew he had to do it soon otherwise he'd be taking the chance that Ianto might get the wrong idea when he woke up. He turned away and began to look around the room, trying to figure out where all of his clothes were. After shifting a few things around he finally found his trousers and slipped them on, then wandered into the hallway to pick up his undershirt and pull it over his head. He glanced around again looking for the rest of them, then belatedly realised that his shoes and his dress shirt were still in the kitchen, along with his gun.

He hurried into the room, picking up and tugging on his dress shirt before moving over to pick up the Webley, giving it a brief cursory examination to make certain it was okay. Once he was confident it wasn't damaged, he shoved it into the holster and walked back towards the table falling heavily into one of the chairs.

'_What a fucking mess you've managed to get yourself into.'_ Jack thought acerbically as he ran his hands over his face.

He had no idea what the hell had come over him the night before. One moment he'd been planning on taking Ianto as hard and as fast as possible, essentially fucking him into the mattress, and the next he was making love to the young man. He couldn't delude himself into thinking it was anything else. After all his talk about refusing to get too deeply involved, Ianto had completely blown him out of the sky. He figured it had something to do with Ianto's personality and how outwardly innocent he appeared to be, but there was so much more when it came to the young man...way more than he expected when he'd first met him. The more time he spent with Ianto, the more he reminded Jack of hidden treasure you might find in a garage. Something that one day you decide to donate to charity, only to open it up and find a stash of perfectly cut diamonds hidden inside.

He had no idea how the hell he'd managed to get himself in so deeply, but he was certainly going to figure it out.

Standing up he started to walk into the living room to get his great coat, but instead found himself turning back towards the bedroom. He had only taken a few steps when Ianto screamed louder and more bloodcurdling then when he'd woken Jack up in the first place. Without even thinking of what he was doing, he ran towards the bedroom.

This time, Ianto had obviously woken up from the nightmare. The moment he entered the room, Ianto turned towards him, his eyes round and full of terror. Jack took one look at him and moved to kneel next to him. He reached a hand up to run it through Ianto's hair like he had when he was asleep and Ianto moved away from him with a terrified look on his face.

Jack tilted his head, puzzled at the reaction. It bothered him a lot more than he wanted to admit. Even when he'd been holding a gun on him during the whole Lisa fiasco, Ianto hadn't shied away from him the way he was doing now. He reached out his hand again and this time Ianto visibly flinched, closing his eyes as if he expected Jack to attack him. After a moment longer, he actually started shivering, which really began to concern Jack.

"Ianto?" Jack said softly, worry clearly evident in his tone, even though he was trying not to let it show.

"Look at me please Ianto. I promise I'm not going to hurt you."

He watched as Ianto opened his eyelids warily, his irises still clouded from whatever nightmare he was trapped in. After a few moments longer they began to clear, the last of his sleep laden mind obviously dissipating. His gaze shifted quickly around the room, then came back to Jack, locking on his face with confusion.

"Jack?"

Jack didn't answer him. Instead he moved up onto the bed, climbing in next to Ianto, and wrapped his arms around him. His shivering was beginning to subside, but Jack was still worried. Whatever Ianto had been dreaming about had evidently been worse then he'd originally thought.

Ianto curled up next to Jack for a moment then pulled away with one last shudder, his eyes closing as a he drew in a deep breath of air. All of a sudden, seemingly out of nowhere, he turned to Jack and shoved him away. Jack reached towards him again and Ianto actually stood up, moving away from him as quickly as possible. Jack stared down at his hands, only mildly surprised at the way Ianto was acting. After everything they'd already gone through, he'd already started to notice a trend in their relationship. They always seemed to be either completely irate with one another, or so turned on they obviously couldn't think straight.

'_That's going to get old real fast.'_ He thought as he turned to look at Ianto.

After a moment longer, he leant forward staring at Ianto's back, trying not to get distracted at the way the smooth skin ran deliciously down his spine and curved over his arse. He had a sense that to do so would only add more fuel to whatever fire had already been inadvertently started.

"Ianto?"

He stood up taking a step toward Ianto. It definitely helped in keeping his mind from going south, but it didn't when it came to figuring out the enigma that was standing in front of him. Ianto obviously heard his approach, because he took another step forward, moving further away.

"Just get the hell out of here Jack." Ianto said suddenly, his voice coarse and distant.

As Ianto spoke, Jack moved back, collapsing heavily on the bed behind him. He sat there for a few moments, his mind cluttering with everything that had happened in the past twenty-four hours, trying to figure out what could have possibly caused the anger that was now obviously coursing through the young man. There were too many things that could have created the situation, everything from what they had discussed about his past, to him saying he needed him.

Jack groaned exasperatedly, suddenly unable to escape the feeling that he was floating in the ocean without a life jacket in sight and a torrent of sharks surrounding him. At the same time though, another emotion was driving throughout him. Anger quickly overrode everything else and he stood up swiftly, moving over and grabbing Ianto by the shoulders to flip him around until they were face to face. The moment he did, Ianto pushed him backwards, forcing him to land prone on the bed. Before he could even recover, Ianto pressed his own body against Jack's, grasping his hands so he couldn't move.

He struggled for a moment, then glanced up at Ianto only to go completely slack when he saw the expression on his face. Mixed between the anger and aggression, he saw a deep seated hurt that was completely bewildering, even if Ianto was trying o hide it.

"Ianto, aren't you getting a little tired of this? Every time we talk alone, we either end up yelling at one another, or tearing off each other's clothes." He said quietly, still trying to figure out what was going on.

Ianto released his hands and glared down at him for a moment longer, then suddenly relaxed and collapsed on the bed next to Jack, a deep sigh escaping his lips. His head fell sideways as he looked at Jack and gave him an ambivalent, yet exhausted, grimace. Jack turned towards Ianto, placing his hand on the young man's chest over his heart. He lay silently, still watching Ianto as he felt the strong steady beat of it under his palm.

Ianto closed his eyes briefly, before reopening them and sighing as he sat up. Jack's hand fell to his thigh and he glanced down at it, shaking his head at the same time.

"Yes sir, I'm so bloody tired of trying to live up to this ideal you have of me that it's going to drive me completely batty."

_-----------_

Ianto turned towards Jack, trying to ignore the look of shock he was receiving from the other man. He reached down and grasped Jack's hand, moving it aside as he stood up. Without focusing too much on what he was doing, he began to walk around his bedroom, gathering the things he needed in order to take a shower and get ready for work. He'd barely made it to the wardrobe when Jack stood up and walked to him, turning him around with much more consideration then he had the first time. Ianto found himself staring at the floor for a moment, until Jack's fingers moved to his head and tilted his chin upwards making their eyes lock.

"What _**ideal**_ are you talking about Ianto?"

Ianto sighed, slightly uncomfortable with the fact that he was standing completely nude, while Jack was fully dressed. It made him feel more vulnerable then he would have liked to admit to anyone, much less Jack. Not to mention the fact that it was one of the reasons he'd gotten angry in the first place. It just reminded him of the moment that Jack had appeared in his bedroom doorway, obviously well on his way to sneaking out before he himself woke up. He turned away and reached into his wardrobe to get out a pair of track pants, pulling them on before turning back towards Jack and answering him.

"Jack, why is it that you have this insane notion that I'm devoid of emotions. Or..." he paused, hesitant to admit the truth before realising that if he didn't get this out, it was just going to end up driving a wedge between them.

"...I guess it would better to ask, why you think that it's not going to hurt me when you act with subterfuge and deception? How is it that you can act like you trust me one minute and the next you do something so incredibly cruel?"

Jack's eyebrows rose at the questions, obviously still trying to figure out what the hell Ianto was talking about. He walked over to the bed and sat down on the edge of it, raising his hands to run lightly over his face, then clenching them tightly together under his chin.

"Ianto, let's try to start at a place where I might actually understand what the hell you're talking about. Because as far as I know, I've trusted you more in the past eight hours, then I have _**anyone**_ in over a hundred and fifty years."

Ianto's lips curled up in distaste as he turned away and, once again, began to put together anything he would need to get dressed for work. He was trying not to let the anger start up again, but as he grabbed a comb and placed it on top of a towel, he managed to break it half. He nearly growled, just barely managing to tamper it down as he heard Jack stand up and begin to walk back over to him. Without waiting for the inevitable grasp of his hands, he whirled around and glared at Jack as he finally let everything that was bothering him come to a head.

"Jack, you had sex with me and then tried to sneak out without even bothering to say anything! What else am I supposed to think except that you finally got what you wanted from me, and now you're going to pretend like nothing happened! Did you think that I was going to wake up and shrug away the fact that you disappeared _**again**_? Did it even occur to you that I might come to figure it all out, _**especially**_ after some of the lies you declared as truth last night?"

He began to advance towards Jack, reaching out at the last second to grab his chin tightly in his palms and not allowing him to look away.

"I suppose the fact that you told me you needed me _**just after**_ you had sex with me was supposed to reassure me? I am a bloody man too Jack. I know how sex makes you say things that you don't actually mean!"

Without waiting for an answer, he released Jack's chin and seized the pile of items he'd been gathering, then stalked towards his shower. Just as he was about to close the door behind him, Jack's hand came up and crashed against the wood, stopping it from closing. Ianto gasped, nearly wincing as Jack pushed against it, slamming the door forcibly into the wall behind.

Jack stood in the doorway, studying him for what seemed like forever. When he did finally speak, his voice was extremely controlled and even.

"Ianto, when I told you I needed you last night, it wasn't because I'd just had sex with you. Maybe I..."

Jack closed his eyes for a moment, drawing in a deep breath of air before continuing quietly.

"...well, I never actually meant to tell you in the first place, but even so, I did _**mean**_ it."

Jack moved forward and Ianto found himself being pressed up against the counter behind him. He started to move to the side and Jack's hands came down, trapping him where he was standing.

"Now Ianto, you need to answer one of my questions."

Ianto fought against the urge to shudder at the tone of Jack's voice, losing miserably and allowing it to break across his body. Ianto bit into his lower lip as Jack pressed closer to him, forcing him to nearly sit on the edge of the counter. He tried to ignore the way his body was reacting traitorously to Jack's proximity as he spoke his next words with a slight quaver in his voice.

"What question is that Sir?"

Jack licked his lips as his eyes travelled first down then up Ianto's body slowly. Ianto nearly groaned, just barely able to hold it in as he recognised the look on Jack's face. Just as he was about to ask the question again, Jack leaned even closer to him and raised one his hands, ghosting along Ianto's chin.

"Why does it really matter to you if I'm gone before you wake up? I would think it would be easier on you considering this thing between us isn't exactly your normal preference."

Ianto's mouth opened and closed a few times before he could stop it until he managed to shut it in a slight frown. He stared at Jack, more confused about his own desires than about what the other man had said. Jack shook his head minutely and dropped his hand back to the counter again before looking at Ianto with pain evident in his eyes.

"Ianto, I've been in this situation before and I can't take the chance of certain circumstances happening again. I'll never pressure you into anything, but I won't invest in anything serious with _**us**_, until you can be honest with yourself. Even then I may have a hard time because of how much I've lost in the past."

Jack pulled away, turning as he began to walk out of bathroom. He was almost back at the doorway when he suddenly stepped back and brushed a slow kiss over Ianto's lips, cupping his jaw with his palm at the same time. He turned away again, walking out of the room and Ianto heard his voice mutter while he was obviously gathering up the rest of his stuff from the living room. It was so low that Ianto was almost certain he wasn't supposed to hear it.

"I just hope like hell that I'm actually ready and can handle it, if you do finally figure it out."

His legs gave out from under him as he heard Jack open and close the front door behind him. Without the support, he found himself sitting down dejectedly on the floor and curling his arms around his legs as his body began to shudder uncontrollably. His voice came out with a soft whisper before he could stop it.

"I...I didn't know. I'm so bloody sorry Jack."

_-----------_

TBC

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_AN: __As always, feedback appreciated but not essential! __Not much in the way of author's notes, but it's been a long week…lol. :)_


	33. Chapter 33 The Price of Righteousness

_AN: Well, it's been a **long **and difficult week. My back is out again. In case you haven't noticed, I'm falling apart...lol. Getting old I guess. :D Anticipation only has about 7 more chapters __(give or take a few)__, but I have started on an outline for the sequel. It will probably be a little darker since it's going more on their established relationship. Anticipation will only go through the end of Countrycide._

_I want to give a great big hug of thanks to Mama Rocks! She really helped me a lot (fairly normal, but she's just that awesome!) and I appreciate how much she does when she works with me on this story! :D  
_

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Chapter 33 - The Price of Righteousness

The fact that no one commented on his driving gave proof to just how upset Gwen, Owen, and Tosh truly were. He'd already damn near gotten into two different accidents on their way back to the Hub. Jack refused to give into their tactics, not saying a word to them in much the same way they were avoiding speaking to him. At this point he was ready to chuck them all out of the damn SUV and let them walk back to the base. The fairies had made it quite clear what would have happened if Jasmine hadn't gone with them. Now, because he chose to save the world instead of destroy it, he was once again the bad guy.

The thing that irritated him the most was how utterly upset Gwen was over the whole situation. She had been there, had heard every single one of the dire destructions the fairies would enforce if they didn't get their way. He'd had to deal with her scepticism and foolishness the entire case and now she seemed to be the one who was the most irate with him. As he ran another light, just about crashing the SUV for the third time in the process, Gwen let out a huff of annoyance. It took every bit of restraint in his body not to turn around and tell her to shut the hell up.

With the way he was driving, it didn't take very long to get back to the Hub. He'd just barely started to pull the SUV into its garage when Owen jumped out and slammed the door behind him. The car was still moving as Gwen opened her door and followed him. Tosh lingered only long enough for him to throw the SUV into park before she got out. Jack waited for the inevitable slam as he sat silently behind the wheel of the car and stared vacantly through the windshield. He nearly jumped out of his skin when she opened the passenger door and slid into the seat next to him quietly.

"Why did you give her to them Jack?"

He sighed and glanced at her before turning back towards the windshield. He'd known she was going to approach him ever since the driveway when she'd turned to glare at him and her expression had flickered to confusion.

"They promised to destroy the world Tosh. If you had been there even a minute earlier, you would have heard everything they would have done, had I not allowed her to go with them."

He spoke softly, turning his head towards the driver side window to stare at the walls that enclosed the SUV's hidden parking garage.

"All of you can be angry at me, but the truth is, I made the right choice. If I hadn't let them have Jasmine, they would have killed everyone...starting with all the children at her school. What choice did I have? It was her or the world!"

When he turned back towards her, he noticed even more confusion on her face. She grimaced for a moment, almost as if she was struggling with her own emotions, before looking at him. He knew she was still annoyed, but the intensity of that anger had lessened, shifting more towards uncertainty, since she had climbed into the SUV.

"If you had just been honest with us from the start, then maybe we could have found a way Jack. Instead, you only told us half truths, like you always do. You need to accept that this is partially your fault..." she said with a harsh tone in her voice.

Jack growled and grasped the door handle, thrusting it open hard. He climbed out of the car, then suddenly turned back towards her. He saw her flinch as he leant forward to grab the keys from the ignition and nearly threw his hands up in indignation.

"I talked about everything Tosh. I told Gwen what to expect! Should I have let them turn the world to ice or make the seas wild? Should I have let them kill every living thing on the planet?"

He leaned forward again placing his hands against the seat as he tried to control his temper. Without realising what he was doing, he looked up at Tosh with pleading in his eyes.

"She wanted to go with them Tosh. I made the choice to let her go where she wanted and allowed the rest of the world to live in the process. Could you have made _**that**_ decision?"

Without waiting for her to answer he slammed the door and walked out of the garage towards the invisible lift. He stepped onto it fully, then suddenly turned away and began walking towards the tourist entrance. He didn't want to go inside and deal with the team, but above all, he really didn't want to find Ianto waiting for him, looking at him accusingly. He had no doubt that Gwen and Owen would have told Ianto what had happened by the time he made it down there. He really wasn't sure if he could handle getting the silent treatment from Ianto. Not when he knew he'd made the right decision.

He needed something to take his mind off all the things that had happened in the past few days. Everything from losing Estelle to giving Jasmine to the fairies was starting to weigh on his mind...not to mention the countless exhausting rollercoaster of emotions he'd been going through with Ianto. After all of that, the idea of sitting in front of the ocean seemed like a downright fabulous idea. Hopefully it would help remind him that he wasn't the monster that everyone saw him as.

Maybe, just maybe, he could listen to the sound of the waves and the seagulls and not feel like a man who lost everything and everyone he loved over time. Then again, maybe he just needed to take a break and put off the inevitable silence that was bound to greet him when he did go inside.

_'One of the only fucking disadvantages of living in the damn Hub__! I can't exactly make the others leave when I want to be alone.'_ He thought morosely as he found and sat down on a bench that faced the ocean.

'_Might be a good idea to look around for a different place to live again.'_

He knew the idea was pointless, there was no way he could leave the Hub every night and pretend like it didn't matter.

Jack sighed again as he watched the small waves break against one another. It did help calm his thoughts, although what they were replaced by wasn't any better. Instead of feeling comforted and reassured he was starting to wonder if Tosh had been right. His next thought sent a niggling fear cascading throughout him.

_'Was there another choice?__ Could I have saved her?'_

He closed his eyes in frustration, not wanting to admit the rest of the team may have been right.

Despite the brightness of the day, the sunlight didn't pierce his darkened lids. Instead several pictures began to form. The sound of the waves and gulls dissipated slowly as the images of a dry seabed and howling eruptive wind took their place. The harsh cracked plain of the seabed was broken only by skeletons of the animals that once habituated the water, every one of their bodies frozen in rigors of pain. He cast the focus towards what used to be land and found it looked much the same. Most of the buildings were gone, only sporadic crumbling ruins remained like jagged teeth thrust out of the earth. There were skeletons everywhere, children and pets included. A moment longer of these images invading his mind and he realised he was suddenly gasping for air. He was going to die from asphyxiation again and again, with no one to hear him, no one to scream out to...

"I saw you come out here on CCTV. I thought you might like some coffee."

Jack jolted backwards, his head hitting the wooden wall behind him heavily as he drew in a harsh gasp of air and his eyes flew open. Ianto didn't move away from him, despite his reaction. Instead he stood his ground holding out a coffee cup towards Jack. Ianto's mouth twitched slightly, a small worried frown flickering across his lips as Jack reached out and hesitantly took the cup from him. After a brief moment he raised the cup and took a small sip of the warm liquid. The moment the coffee hit his taste buds he gasped and took a deeper drink, staring down at the liquid with amazement.

Ianto sat down next to him, his hand coming up to rest on Jack's leg and grip it in a comforting gesture. He turned towards him with surprise, his head tilted with sudden suspicion. He was further shocked to find that Ianto wasn't even looking at him. Instead, he was gazing out at the ocean, his blue-grey eyes sparkling imperceptibly in the sunlight.

"This isn't the coffee you normally give me Ianto..."

Ianto's eyes never wavered from where he was looking, but a soft smile did curve over his lips as his hand tightened momentarily on Jack's thigh.

"I don't make it unless it's needed and after what Tosh..." Ianto paused, his eyes finally shifting towards Jack's for a split second before moving back towards the dark blue water.

"Well, needless to say, I thought it might help."

At Ianto's words, Jack closed his eyes again, the images of the dead world coming back quickly to invade his mind. Suddenly, a new vision appeared, making him wince and nearly cry out. Among the ruins of the Hub, he saw Ianto's body frozen in the agony of death throes. Just as he was about shudder he felt Ianto's fingers caressing his chin in an attempt to get him to turn towards him. He allowed the movement, opening his eyes slowly, if only to reassure himself that what he was seeing with his mind's eye was false.

"You did the right thing Jack."

Jack felt his body tense up as soon as Ianto spoke. It took him a few seconds to realise exactly what Ianto had said and when he did, he couldn't stop his mouth from dropping open with shock. He stared at the young man beside him, confusion invading every part of his mind and body.

"_**You**_? You think giving Jasmine to the fairies was the _**right**_ thing?"

He shook his head lightly, still trying to comprehend the words. It was almost as if Ianto had spoken a different language. Which, considering how many he knew, wouldn't have been all that surprising.

Jack placed the now empty coffee cup on the bench beside him and stood up. He walked over to the railing, gripping the chain and one of the posts tightly with his hands as he drew in deep breaths of air. Ianto came up behind him silently, startling him again as warm arms encircled his waist. He felt the young man's chin come to rest on his shoulder as he finally sighed with relief. He knew that Ianto wouldn't stay where he was, he was too damn self conscious about his attraction to Jack, but he was going to take the comfort for as long as the young man remained there. After a moment longer he relaxed backwards, letting Ianto take his weight. He was extremely surprised when Ianto tightened his arms around his waist and pressed closer into him. He could feel every inch of the young man's bulk as it covered him from behind and, despite the circumstances, felt his own body begin to react to the proximity.

Jack sighed with contentment, relief flooding throughout him as he finally accepted Ianto's comfort as honest. He released the railing and raised his own hands to cover Ianto's, twining their fingers together in the process. Ianto sighed against his cheek then whispered softly in his ear.

"Close your eyes Jack."

Jack shuddered, not able to fight a grimace from what he knew he would see, but did as Ianto requested of him. The moment his eyelids fluttered shut, the dead world invaded his senses, forcing its way to the forefront of his mind. He began to tremble perceptibly and Ianto tightened his arms further, just enough of a distraction for him to hear Ianto whisper again.

"Listen Jack. Pay attention. Feel me."

Ianto's lips brushed lightly along his ear, his tongue swiping out to travel along the edge, before closing gently over the lobe. He groaned, low and under his breath as Ianto began suckling and nibbling on his it. Before he could do more than thrust his hips backwards, Ianto released his ear, running his tongue and teeth along his neck, nipping and tugging gently at his skin. Jack moaned again and Ianto pulled back from him almost reluctantly. Jack started to open his eyes in protest, but Ianto growled at him, though not harshly.

"No Jack. Keep your eyes closed...but look...watch."

If anything was going to confuse him right then, it would be that statement alone. Just as he was about to ask Ianto what the hell he was talking about, he felt something odd begin to happen. While Ianto had been kissing his neck, the images of the dead world had begun to fade quickly. Now though, he was beginning to see a new vision, one that almost seemed to be thrust into his mind.

He gasped suddenly as he heard the wind begin to blow, the sound almost musical as it ruffled the silver leaves of trees. He knew his eyes were closed, but the bright bluish-amber sun in the sky nearly made him want to squint. The sky was a brilliant orange, clouds moving so slowly through it that the progress almost imperceptible. In the distance, he saw mountain ranges and metal buildings glittering and sparkling, reflecting the glimmer of the bright glare of the sun. He drew in a deep breath and felt Ianto's arms squeeze him softly, his thumbs sliding gently over the tops of their entwined fingers. He started to turn around to see if Ianto was with him in this unusual place and was suddenly distracted when he realised he was standing knee deep in vivid purple grass.

With a harsh intake of breath, Jack wrenched his eyelids open, the sea before him becoming a dark blue blur as he whirled around to look at Ianto. Not only was he still struggling against the arousal that was coursing through his body, but his shock at the visions of that place was practically palpable. He had no idea where Ianto had gotten that place from, but he was even more stunned that the young man had been able to plant it in his mind.

"What the _**hell**_ was that?"

Ianto dropped his head abruptly, looking almost contrite as he stared down at the dock they were standing on. When he didn't say anything, Jack reached out and grabbed him, thrusting him against the wooden post of the railing and dropping his hands to the chain, trapping the young man where he stood.

"Or an even better question would be, how the hell did you do that?"

Ianto sighed still gazing down at the weathered wood beneath their feet. He knew that Jack's questions were perfectly valid, especially considering the definitive way he had invaded the other man's mind. For some reason, he was almost frightened, mainly because of the way that Jack was now hovering over him. There was something else though...

He was also mildly surprised.

If Jack had investigated him as deeply as he said he had, he should have found out about his training. It wasn't exactly as though Torchwood London had kept it hidden. In fact, everyone who had received the training had it clearly marked in their employment file, just in case they needed to use that person in any of their research.

He closed his eyes briefly then shifted them back towards Jack's almost hesitantly. He was somewhat afraid that Jack would be glaring at him with hatred, particularly since he'd managed to essentially invade his mind, even without the benefit of alien technology. As their gazes locked, Ianto nearly collapsed with relief. Jack wasn't staring at him hatefully. Instead what he found was nothing more than innate curiosity, almost intricate in its openness.

"Did you like it? It's the place I pictured when reading _Wuthering Heights_." he said softly, his gaze shifting quickly back and forth between Jack's eyes.

Jack shook his head minutely and Ianto almost groaned with disappointment, until he realised he was just brushing the question aside. He knew Jack was still waiting for an answer to his second question, but he was actually enjoying knowing something about himself that Jack hadn't been able to find out from reading his file. After another few moments he gave up and turned away, staring towards the tourist office.

"I had basic psychic training in London. They taught me slightly more than most others because of my eidetic memory. I'm still not all that good at it, but I do have some unique talents."

From the corner of his eye he saw Jack's head tilt slightly. The expression was so intense, his scrutiny so probing, that Ianto actually felt his cheeks begin to warm and flush. Jack released the chain and sidestepped around Ianto, finally allowing him the freedom to move. He turned sideways and looked at Jack, a soft smile playing across his lips before he could stop it. Jack smiled back at him momentarily then shifted his gaze back out to the ocean. Just as he was starting to think Jack wasn't going to comment he heard the other man sigh.

"You do realise how much of a mystery you are, right Ianto?" Jack said with an amused tone in his voice.

"I knew that file didn't say everything after I'd spent more than five minutes with you. The damn thing said you were an able student, but not exceptional. Anyone with your knowledge base couldn't have possibly been average."

Jack smiled conspiratorially at Ianto and reached over to pull him close, brushing a soft quick kiss over his lips.

"You know Ianto, normally my mind is an impenetrable safe haven. Yet within months _**you've**_ actually managed to invade it...twice. First with that wrist band, and now this..."

He released Ianto suddenly, taking a slight step away from him.

"Who are you?"

Ianto raised his eyebrow, in what he was certain was becoming a familiar expression to Jack. After a quick moment of internal debate, he dropped the smile and relaxed his body, holding out his hand in invitation. He tried as hard as he could to look the exact same way he had the night he'd met Jack. It was a little difficult considering he was now wearing a suit and that night he'd been a lot more casual, but he knew he'd achieved his goal as Jack's eyebrows quirked up in obvious amusement.

"Jones, Ianto Jones."

The moment the words left Ianto's mouth, Jack began to laugh. He ignored the outstretched hand, instead reaching forward and pulling Ianto towards him, gripping him in a tight bear hug. Ianto chuckled as he wrapped his own arms around Jack, holding him tightly and pressing his face against the crook of Jack's neck. They stayed that way for a few minutes, Ianto taking deep breaths and letting Jack's scent invade every one of his senses. He pulled out of the embrace to see an easy smile on Jack's face and returned it with one of his own. Entwining their fingers, Jack began to lead him towards the tourist entrance, stopping only long enough to grab the coffee cup from the bench. He stopped again just outside the door and glanced at Ianto unsurely.

"Do you think I had another choice Ianto?"

Ianto shook his head before he even finished the question. He knew Jack was questioning himself because of the team's reactions, but Tosh and Gwen's stories had told Ianto that there had been very little choice in the matter. Jasmine would have gone to the fairies eventually regardless of Jack's decision. He raised his other hand and ran the back of his fingers down Jack's cheek, pausing long enough to trace along his jaw line.

"Jack, from everything that Gwen told me, you _**did**_ have two options. However, I think that you took the only choice you could have made to save the most people. That's something I learnt from you the night Lisa died."

He paused, squeezing Jack's hand tighter for a moment before completely releasing it, reaching up to cup his jaw in his palms.

"You can't save everyone Jack. You can only save the ones who want to be saved."

Jack's eyebrows rose in amazement as Ianto turned away from him and opened the door. He held it open long enough for Jack to follow him in, then shut and locked it behind them. The moment he threw the bolt, Jack grabbed him and pressed him against the wall, bringing his mouth against Ianto's in a rough kiss.

Ianto whimpered, grabbing onto Jack and pulling him closer, his hands cupping the other man's chin possessively. He heard Jack gasp in a breath of air as he used his thumb to tug down on his lower lip, his tongue flicking out to lick teasingly over the other man's. Jack's tongue swiped deliberately across his teeth, teasing and tantalising Ianto's mouth to the point of recklessness. Ianto felt his knees weaken and he grasped Jack tighter, thrusting his hips forward to collide roughly with other man's until they both moaned heavily. He was already hard, his cock pressing almost painfully against his zip. From that brief pressure against Jack's own hips, he knew the other man was just as turned on.

He reached up, attempting to unbutton Jack's shirt only to be stopped by hands intercepting his intentions. He struggled for a moment, trying to release his hands from the tight grip of Jack's fingers. A few seconds later and he conceded, growling in frustration. Jack chuckled under his breath, holding his wrists against his chest with one hand as he ran his other hand down Ianto's abdomen. His fingers trailed over Ianto's erection lightly, tracing over the outline through his trousers. Ianto canted his hips forward, trying to increase the pressure as his own fingers scrabbled against Jack's shirt, trying to grip it.

Jack cupped his erection tightly, stroking his hand up and down a few times. Ianto's vision blurred for a moment as he finally yanked his hands free, reaching around to grasp Jack's arse and tug him harshly against his body.

Ianto's mouth attacked the skin just below Jack's ear, sucking and biting it hard enough to leave a mark. He heard Jack chuckle and sucked the skin into his mouth harder, turning the sound into a deep growl. Jack pulled away roughly, taking a few steps back and gasping harshly for air. He was trembling, obviously struggling extremely hard for control over his arousal. Ianto started to step towards him, confused at why he was holding himself back when they were both so obviously ready. Jack's hand came up, motioning for him to stay away.

"Ianto, you do remember where we are right?" he said somewhat broken, between panting for air.

"Do you honestly want anyone to come up here, or to see us having sex on the CCTV?"

Ianto growled, stepping forward while reaching out to grab Jack and yank their bodies back together. He heard a muffled surprised gasp as he attacked Jack's neck again, this time on the other side. He pulled his mouth away after a few minutes, taking pleasure in the love bite that was formed perfectly in the light skin. Jack stared at him, his eyes half lidded and darkened with arousal. He smiled libidinously at the unrestrained lust reflected on Jack's face and leant forward to suck his lower lip into his mouth. Jack's hands grappled at his back, digging his nails so hard into the fabric of his jacket he was honestly worried about it ripping. He released Jack's lip with a soft popping sound, then gasped with surprise as Jack's hands moved down to his arse, gripping and kneading the globes in his palms. Ianto smirked, taking in every aspect of the man in front him as he rocked their hips together again.

"Jack, do you really think I give a fuck anymore? If you didn't notice while we were outside and I was practically draped over you..." Ianto paused, leaning forward and running his tongue along Jack's jaw before continuing in a low whisper.

"...I don't bloody care if anyone sees us."

He started to move forward again and Jack pulled away from him completely, a mixture of both suspicion and confusion on his face. Jack took a few steps away, before turning abruptly and slamming his hand down on the button that would open the entrance to the Hub. Just before he walked through the door he glanced back towards Ianto and shook his head minutely.

"That doesn't change in just one day Ianto."

Ianto gaped at him as he disappeared without any further explanation.

TBC

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_AN: I think my muse is setting something up but I'm not sure where it's going. That vision even made me go "huh?" _

_So what do you think? I thank all of you who are nice enough to review. It's not necessary, but boy do I **love **it when you choose to leave one! The story will get written either way, but I do adore you folks for taking the time and also making me laugh occasionally! :D  
_


	34. Chapter 34 Naked Hide & Seek

AN: Okay, I know I disappeared for a while there and I know most of you did not get a response to feedback and messages, but I had a valid reason. I lost my favourite uncle about a month ago. Things are starting to get back to normal but I spent a lot of time helping my cousins get things situated. I promise the wait for the next chapter will not be as long next time!

Anyway, this is the second version of this chapter. I let Mama Rocks choose which one she liked better. Then she did an awesome job in BETAing it as well! She also managed to choose the longer chapter...lol.

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Chapter 34 - Naked Hide & Seek

Jack grinned wickedly as he shut the door behind him. He'd been trying to hold it in, to not give Ianto any clues to what he had planned, but it had slipped out unwillingly. He knew that Ianto had probably seen it, which gave him a lot less time than he anticipated. If he plotted his next move carefully, he might just be able to shock the hell out of him. The idea of ruffling Ianto, perhaps making him speechless, had an incredible draw to it.

The moment the latch clicked in place Jack turned and took off running down the corridor. He was fairly certain that only he knew how much of a maze these tunnels were and he was going to take full advantage of that fact. Instead of calling the elevator when he reached it, he turned and started to walk down the tunnel. He had only taken a few steps when he found a flaw in his plan. He tilted his head slightly as a thought ran through his mind.

'_How do I give him directions?'_

After a split second of debate he allowed another wicked smile to flit over his lips and kicked off his shoes. Just as he leant down to arrange them he heard the door mechanism began to whir again indicating Ianto was finally coming after him. He finished what he was doing as quickly as possible, and took off running, trying not to laugh so as not to give away his position.

The instant he made it to the next corner, he stopped again and glanced back, pulling his belt from his trousers at the same time. The sound of Ianto's footsteps echoed towards him and made him look up as he began to arrange it into a rudimentary arrow, pointing in the direction he was going. Ianto had paused as well and Jack was fairly certain that he'd found the shoes. The best that he could hope for would be that Ianto would follow his bread crumbs.

Jack stood up and began running again, aiming to get well ahead of Ianto. He paused now and again to leave behind another item of clothing...another clue, making sure that each piece was arranged so as to point in the right direction.

By the time Jack reached his intended target he was breathing heavily from exertion. He glanced down and let out a low barking laugh. Apparently there had been more corners than he'd realised. The only clothing he had left were his trousers and socks. After a quick look down at the concrete floor he shook his head and unsnapped his trousers, slipping them down his legs. There was no way he was going to let his toes touch that icy floor. He'd lose the socks when he got into the next room. There was a nice thick carpet that covered the floor and he wouldn't have to deal with cold feet.

He dropped the trousers, not bothering to arrange them into any kind of clue. The short hallway he was in only led to one door so he wasn't worried about Ianto getting confused. Turning away, he walked a few paces and slipped through the doorway, shutting it softly behind him. He glanced at the wall in front of him, smiling conspiratorially before turning away and looking around the room.

He hadn't needed to use this room in a long while and it certainly showed the effects of time abandonment. Everything in it was covered by dusty white sheets which may have been a little disconcerting if it was dark, but the wall provided enough light to be able to see quite clearly. Jack reached forward and tugged one of the sheets off, revealing a bare heavy oak desk with a soft leather chair pushed up against it. Both gleamed in the light that shone from the opposite wall, reflecting the obvious care that they'd undergone when Jack had last seen them.

In some ways, he really regretted closing up the room. If he had used it when Suzie was alive he might have been able to see things a little clearer. Maybe then he would have known just how psychotic she'd gone over that fucking glove. He didn't dare think about how it could have given him insight to Ianto and Lisa as well. The problem was he'd made the decision several years ago to put trust in his team. At the time, he'd known the chance he was taking. He just had no idea where the consequences of that faith would lead. Even now, after everything that had happened, he was still choosing to believe in them. However, he was hoping that Ianto would find the secret of this place incredibly remarkable.

Jack jumped as a low noise came from outside the room, shocking him out of his reverie. He'd nearly forgotten what he was doing with Ianto which, considering the fact that he was standing there with nothing but his socks on, wasn't exactly conducive to the game he'd started. Without glancing around any further, he moved over to the corner and slipped quietly behind one of the taller items that he was fairly sure was a covered wardrobe, just as the door began to open. He wanted to be able to see Ianto's face when he understood what was so special about this room, knowing it was something the young man had no idea existed.

Keeping to the shadows, he peeked around the edge watching carefully as Ianto's head poked into the room.

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It had taken Ianto very little time to recover despite the fact that his shock had been so palpable that he'd honestly stood there with his mouth hanging open. It was only the glimpse of Jack's devilish smile as he closed the door that had brought him back to himself. He knew that grin well, having seen it a hundred times in the past few months whenever Jack was getting ready to try some type of seduction on him, however minute. Nevertheless, that expression was highly confusing under the current circumstances. After all, Jack had just turned down an opportunity for sex. He started to walk forward and paused as he glanced around the room, his eyes narrowing when they locked on the camera in the corner.

_'But did he really? Or was he just trying to make sure our dalliances stayed just between us?'_

Ianto had denied the idea when Jack mentioned it, but he was still mildly confused when it came to his attraction for the other man. Jack seemed to understand that factor in their relationship, even if he himself ignored it. Without any further hesitation, he slammed his hand down on the button for the door and walked through it, shutting it quickly behind him.

As soon as he began to walk towards the elevator he knew Jack was up to something. Jack's shoes were arranged into an arrow, the toes touching and pointing down the corridor. He walked towards them quickly, flicking his eyes around the dim cavern. As he stooped down to pick up the shoes a flash of reflective light caught his gaze. He headed in the direction it came from as a smile flitted over his lips.

Ianto kept smiling as he began to walk down the corridor toward the glare he'd seen. When he reached the next corner he spotted Jack's belt and felt laughter bubble out of him. He reached down to grab it but kept walking. He hadn't gone too much further before he came across Jack's great coat. The sight of it hanging so carefully from the light fixture made him chuckle again.

_'Thank God for small miracles. If he'd left it on the bloody ground I would've had to get it dry cleaned again.'_

It was as he was tossing the coat over his shoulder that he realised that was probably the reason why it was hanging up in the first place. He chuckled again and began walking faster. He could hear Jack running somewhere in the tunnels, but he was far too amused to do more than pick up his pace. It didn't take too much longer to spot Jack's braces. They joined the growing pile of clothes in his arms. He started to jog, his eyes scanning every turn and one or two doorways he passed, looking for another clue.

He very nearly missed the next clue, only glimpsing the dress shirt from the corner of his eye as he passed it. He picked it up as he turned, still jogging. He'd never been in this section of the tunnels before and had no idea where they led to. He did notice a definitive slant in the floor, so he at least knew he was heading downwards. Beyond that, he had no idea what to expect.

He snatched Jack's undershirt as he turned another corner and slowed back to walking. As much as he hated to admit it, this game was making him insanely curious. With the way it was headed, he was almost certain he was going to discover a very nude Jack at the end. The thought alone sent arousal coursing throughout his entire body, making his trousers become slightly uncomfortable as his cock began to harden.

He was so busy imagining what he was going to find that he nearly walked into a wall. He stopped just short of it and glanced around in confusion. He hadn't seen any turns or doorways for quite a while, yet the tunnel that he was walking down seemed to be a dead end. He groaned in frustration, smacking his hand onto the wall at the same time. He was almost positive he hadn't missed any turns. Jack's undershirt had led down this tunnel and there had been no other directions to take since he started along it.

Ianto turned around, his gaze flitting along the edge of the walls as he began to walk back towards his last turn. He'd only gone a few paces when he saw something sticking out of the ground. He moved towards it and nearly jumped when he realised there was another hallway somewhat hidden behind the brickwork. The effect made the archway disappear when it was seen from the other direction and barely visible from the way he was walking as well. If Jack's trousers hadn't been lying on the floor he would have missed it completely.

He picked up the trousers and added them to the rest of Jack's clothes before hesitantly stepping forward. As soon as he entered the hallway he saw a doorway at the very end with a bright light cascading from underneath it. The beam had an odd quality to it, flickering and stuttering as if a television was on behind the door.

Testing the doorknob, he found it unlocked. Ianto sucked in a deep breath of air, holding it as he began to push open the door. Despite the fact that he was still fighting against his arousal, he was suddenly nervous and unsure. He poked his head through the opening as his teeth began to worry his lower lip.

"Jack?"

----------

The unsurety in Ianto's voice almost made him come out from where he was hiding.

Almost.

In fact, if Ianto hadn't looked over at the far wall at that moment, his mouth dropping open in shock, Jack would have revealed his position. He watched as Ianto stepped fully into the room, his arms holding the bundle of clothes that Jack had left behind as clues. Jack smiled again with amusement as he saw that all of them were bunched up together, but his great coat was draped over Ianto's shoulder safe from the obvious wrinkled state of the rest.

Jack was barely able to suppress laughter as Ianto took a few hesitant steps, dropping the bundled clothes on top of the desk in front of him and kept moving forward. His hand came up tentatively, running the tips of his fingers over the smooth glass that covered the wall. Ianto glanced around furtively, then took a step forward and pressed his palms fully against the glass, tilting to touch his forehead against it.

After a few minutes Jack was once again ready to step out of his hiding spot, more now because he was worried, but Ianto turned away suddenly. As his face shifted towards where Jack was hiding, he saw a gleam of confusion and fear reflecting in the young man's expression. Jack pulled back quickly and quietly, trying to breathe evenly. If he hadn't known any better he would've sworn that Ianto had tears in his eyes. For reasons he couldn't explain, it made him wonder what was possibly going through Ianto's mind to affect him so deeply.

He heard Ianto sigh softly and peeked around the corner again trying to figure out what the young man was up to. The moment he did, he nearly jumped out of his skin as Ianto grabbed him and yanked him from behind the wardrobe pressing their bodies flush against one another.

"Really Jack? Naked hide and seek? Doesn't it count as cheating when you lead me right to you?"

Jack laughed pressing closer to Ianto as he raised his hand to run the tips of his fingers along the young man's chin before cupping it gently in his palm. The feel of Ianto's suit rubbing against his naked body burned just enough to make him tug the young man closer to him, a soft growl resonating from deep in his chest. The moment the sound left his lips Ianto rolled his eyes wanly, his mouth forming a tight line as the corners tugged up in an apparent attempt to hold back a smile. He obviously had something on his mind, but Jack couldn't seem to figure out what it was.

"Well, how else were you going to find me? It's not like I told you we were going to play a game."

Ianto snorted somewhat uncouthly and suddenly took a step away from Jack. It wasn't until that moment that Jack realised Ianto hadn't raised his arms or pulled him close like he normally did. He hadn't needed to untangle his fingers from Jack's neck or hair and he certainly hadn't run his hands over Jack's nude body. In fact the only one who had been trying to get closer was Jack himself. Ianto hadn't done anything more than yank Jack from behind the covered wardrobe. The rest of the contact, Jack had managed to impugn on both of them.

"Every thing's a bloody game to you, isn't it Jack?" Ianto said with a gruff voice as he averted his gaze to look at the wall again.

After a moment longer, Ianto turned away from the wall and began walking around the room. He stopped at each covered item and ran his fingers lightly over the sheets, shaking his head as clouds of dust puffed into the air. He paused for a moment as he came across a doorway, different than the one they'd entered from, then stepped past it without another glance. After he circled the room fully he ended up back at the wall and closed his eyes, leaning forward to place his forehead against it in much the same way he had when he'd first seen it.

"Why are you showing me this Jack? It's not some kind of subtle hint that you're watching me is it?"

When Ianto turned back toward Jack, his mouth so grim he was almost pouting, there was a definite sparkle of moisture in his eyes again. Jack stared at him, confusion running rampant through his mind. Without thinking about what he was doing he moved towards Ianto, his arms encircling the young man tightly in his embrace as he pulled him away from the wall.

"I wasn't hinting at anything Ianto. I just thought I would play up to your obvious sudden need for exhibitionism."

Ianto pulled away from him, his eyebrows furrowed in mystification. Before Jack could even try to figure out why Ianto was confused, the young man burst out laughing, his eyes sparkling with obvious amusement. His laughter began to grow in intensity as his eyes flicked over Jack's frame. Jack pulled away from him and went to the desk chair, dropping into it dejectedly trying not to show Ianto how irate he was suddenly feeling. Ianto drooped backwards, falling bonelessly against the wall, his laughter becoming muffled as he struggled to control it.

"_**My**_ need for exhibitionism? Where the bloody hell would you get the idea that _**I'm**_ an exhibitionist? Are you sure you're not just tapping into your own desire?" Ianto said after a few minutes when he was apparently finally able to gain some control.

Jack glared at him for a moment, his eyes narrowing in frustration. He was trying incredibly hard not to simply give up and walk out, but with every word the young man said he was starting to realise Ianto had no idea what he was referring to. Standing back up he moved towards Ianto slowly, almost stalkingly. Whatever amusement Ianto was finding in the situation seemed to suddenly dry up as his laughter abruptly ceased. Jack couldn't stop his lips from forming into a half smirk as he saw Ianto gulp, his throat bobbing rapidly in reflex. He kept moving forward, taking immense pleasure in the way Ianto was breathing shallowly and how his eyes grew wider with every bit of space that diminished between them. Jack began talking, almost whispering as he approached him.

"We could test that theory. After all, you all but began to strip in the tourist office, in front of the video camera. You were draped over me on the docks. Are you honestly going to try and tell me that the thought of having sex here doesn't turn you on?"

Jack reached out and began to unbutton Ianto's shirt as he leant forward to nip at his earlobe. He heard Ianto suck in a deep breath of air and chuckled lightly. Releasing the soft skin from his teeth he ran his lips along the outer edge of Ianto's ear as he continued.

"Are you going to deny that fact? Deny that the image of me bending you over that desk and fucking you until you scream my name in front of all of them doesn't make your blood boil?"

Ianto sucked more air into his lungs, his whole body quivering beneath Jack's fingers. Jack grinned again, his lips travelling down to Ianto's neck and sucking the skin harshly into his mouth. He pressed his palms upwards, slipping Ianto's shirt from his shoulders and letting it fall to the floor. After a few seconds he moved to Ianto's other ear and blew softly into it as he spoke in a whisper.

"Breathe Ianto."

Ianto exhaled harshly, gasping and growling softly at the same time. As Jack moved to pull his undershirt over his head, Ianto knocked his hands away and yanked it off himself. Before he realised what was happening Ianto spun them both around and pressed him against the wall, thrusting his hips harshly into Jack's.

Ianto groaned, glancing over Jack's shoulder at the same time. Jack chuckled lightly, smiling halfway when Ianto's gaze locked back on his own. The irises were dark and passionate, his chest heaving as he tried to breathe normally. Just as Jack reached forward to pull Ianto's lips to his own, the young man tangled his fingers in Jack's short hair. Leaning forward, Ianto's mouth drew close to his own pausing a few millimetres away. His breath tickled Jack's lips as he spoke softly.

"They can't see us?"

Jack shook his head minutely and closed the distance between them.

----------

Ianto allowed the kiss to overwhelm him, his hands dropping to Jack's arse and tugging him closer. He tilted his head back as Jack's lips broke from his, moving across his chin and locking on his neck. Jack's teeth scraped over his skin and he growled, his nails curving and digging into the naked flesh.

At first when he'd seen this room he'd been completely baffled. The idea that Jack could spy on the Hub any time he wanted without anyone knowing he was even there, was a frightening thought. The room was so well hidden behind the bare wall of the hub and looking out, every workstation was clearly visible. Because of the very wall he now had the other man pressed against, Jack had the power to discover secrets that the rest of the team might be tempted to hide from him. He knew exactly why Jack would want a place such as this, but after walking around the room and noting the evident dust, he'd realised it hadn't been used in a long time. It had sent shivers up his spine when he'd thought about the way he'd hidden Lisa and how Jack could have easily known about the whole situation if he'd just used this room.

Jack's hands ran down his shoulders and Ianto jumped, pressing his body fully against the other man, his mind coming back to the present. His own hands ran up the hard muscles, allowing his nails to scrape lightly over the soft skin that covered them. Curving them around Jack's waist, he continued moving up until he reached the hard plains of his chest. Jack growled in his ear as Ianto's fingers began tugging on his nipples, tweaking and pinching them. Before Ianto knew what was happening, Jack had him pressed face first against the wall that showed the Hub. He knew why Jack had flipped him around, but it was still a shock to see Gwen walk past them as Jack pressed his cock against his cloth covered arse. The fact that she never even glanced their way didn't matter. Jack's voice drifted to his ear as his lips began to travel the back of his neck closing over every ridge of his spine.

"What do you want Ianto?"

Ianto shuddered as he felt Jack's tongue swipe over a particularly sensitive spot. Jack's hands continued moving over his body slowly, but he was too preoccupied to notice what they were doing. Instead he just kept watching the hub, arousal and terror mixing throughout his body at the thought of anyone being able to see them. It took him a few seconds to realise he'd been asked a question.

"W-Want?"

He felt Jack chuckle behind him, his lips curling into a smile.

"Yes Ianto. Are we going to leave so that your exhibitionist streak goes unfulfilled? Or do you want me to take you against this very wall?"

Ianto groaned low, his hips thrusting back towards Jack's body as the thought cascaded through his mind. The image that came to his mind at Jacks words was so arousing that he nearly collapsed. He heard Jack chuckle again.

"Maybe not the wall. How about over the desk so you can see everything?"

Without waiting for an answer, Jack pulled him away from the wall and began to draw him backwards. He nearly tripped and glanced down with confusion as his trousers caught his ankles. Apparently while his mouth had been tormenting Ianto's neck, Jack's hands had been busy unbuckling his trousers. He kicked them off and kept moving backwards, only stopping when Jack did.

As Jack began to push him onto the desk, Ianto stopped him, turning around to wrap his arms around the other man's waist.

"Jack, is it...er...can they hear us?"

Jack grinned, shaking his head at the same time.

"Not unless we want them to." Jack said as he pressed him backwards.

Once Ianto was lying prone he grinned devilishly and quirked his eyebrows. Just as Ianto was starting to wonder what he was up to, Jack leant forward and nibbled on his collarbone, flicking his tongue out to soothe the area while talking softly.

"Or unless I make you scream _**really**_ loud..."

The moment that Jack finished speaking, Ianto gasped in surprise as a finger pressed into his entrance. He was still slightly sore from the previous night, but the ache was more enjoyable than painful. The tip of the finger ran lightly over his prostate, making him jump as a shock of pleasure travelled straight to his cock. He heard a loud groan echo throughout the room, only realising it had come from him as it began to dissipate.

Jack pulled his hand back for a moment, his mouth travelling down Ianto's chest to latch onto one of the pebbled nipples, before Ianto felt the finger return slick and cool. He spent a split second wondering where Jack had managed to hide the lube, then realised he didn't care as another digit pressed in next to it. Ianto's head tilted back, his eyelids slamming shut as Jack's mouth drifted across his chest, his tongue flicking out to circle the other nipple, before closing over it.

Just when he thought he couldn't take anymore of the double assault, Jack added to the pleasure by wrapping his palm around Ianto's erection. He moved the tight fist up and down, stroking him in time with the thrust of his fingers. Ianto's body arched upwards before he could stop it, his hands grasping tightly to the desk as his hips struggled to keep pace with Jack's movements.

"Bloody hell Jack! Would you just fuck me!"

----------

Jack pulled completely away from Ianto, unable to stop a grin from covering his lips. He was fairly certain Ianto had no idea how loud he'd been moaning since Jack started touching him, much less the volume to his voice when he'd screamed.

"It's a good thing these walls are mostly soundproof Ianto." he said in a low voice as he ran the tips of his fingers down the underside of Ianto's cock.

Jack chuckled again as Ianto gasped and thrust his hips up into the touch. He started to pull away only to be stopped by Ianto's hand capturing his own, pressing it fully against his erection. He let Ianto control his hand for a moment then began to pull it back, only to stop abruptly when Ianto released a menacing growl of warning from his chest.

The sound went straight through Jack's body, his cock twitching in anticipation.

If it wasn't for the shocked look that Ianto suddenly had on his own face, Jack probably would have come without any warning. Instead he found himself fighting back laughter as he leant forward and grasped Ianto's wrists, forcing them above the young man's head. Ianto moaned in frustration, tugging his arms and narrowing his eyes at Jack.

"Turn over Ianto."

The words had barely left his lips when Ianto yanked himself out of Jack's grasp and scrambled to do as he was told. He lay face down across the desk with his legs hanging over and slightly spread, his arse arched up in invitation. Jack shifted him slightly, making sure he was facing the Hub, before allowing himself to move behind him. He knew Ianto was expecting him to just thrust into his body, but Jack took a little time to study the young man before him. He loved the way Ianto looked like this, when he was so spread out and open before him. There were times when he told Ianto he looked good in those suits that he was sure the young man thought he was just playing up his normal flirting. What Ianto didn't know was how often Jack had found himself staring at Ianto's arse whenever he bent over or turned around and walked away from him. Quite often, Jack would find himself sucking in a deep breath of air and trying to remember how to breathe as he stared at those smooth rounded buttocks.

Jack sighed, running his hands lightly up the back of Ianto's thighs, luxuriating in the feel of the silky smooth hairs covering them as they tickled at his palms. His fingers spread out as he reached Ianto's arse and cupped each cheek in his palms, stroking and squeezing them. He continued to caress and knead, focussing on the whimpers and gasps of pleasure that Ianto released every time he clasped them. After a few minutes, Ianto cried out and gripped the edge of the desk forcing his arse further into Jack's touches, spreading his legs wider in the process.

"Oh God Jack, please…._**please**_…"

Jack grinned and allowed himself one last caress before running his hands up Ianto's back, forcing his fingertips to brush along every ridge they came across. Ianto's whimpers were beginning to drive the desire deeper into his cock, making it twitch and weep with anticipation, but he held off, wanting to bring the young man closer to the edge. As his fingers neared Ianto's neck he curled them, allowing his nails to scratch lightly at the skin.

He was wholly unprepared for Ianto's reaction to the sensation. Before he could stop him, Ianto reared up, releasing the desk to reach back and grasp Jack's cock, pressing his hips backwards, trying to force it into his body. Jack heard a strangled moan come from his own chest as he pressed Ianto back down and reached for the lube, slicking up his cock as quickly as possible. He closed his eyes and started to press forward, relishing in the pleasure that exploded throughout him as the warmth of Ianto's body enveloped him. The tightness of it drew him in further as the head of his cock popped fully into the young man.

"Fuck Ianto, you are so God damn hot and tight…" Jack said in a low whisper before he could stop himself.

Ianto groaned in response as he reached back and grasped Jack's hips, trying to pull him further into him. A soft chuckle fell from Jack's lips as he locked his legs, not allowing Ianto what he wanted. Instead, Jack ran his hands down Ianto's back, once more allowing his nails to scratch lightly over the muscled plains. He heard Ianto cry out again as he pressed backwards suddenly, drawing Jack's cock completely into his body in one smooth move before he could stop him. The shock of the slick heat closing over his cock made Jack jump, thrusting forward, trying to get deeper into him. He heard a whimper and started to pull back, only to feel Ianto's fingers curl around his arse and pull him back in, holding him there.

"Oh God Jack…"

The sound of his name when Ianto moaned nearly made him come. It took every bit of restraint in him to hold back as his fingers wrapped around Ianto's arse cheeks, spreading him open further. He pushed his hips forward and draped himself over Ianto's back, struggling to remain in control.

Jack was so wrapped up in the feel of Ianto's body that it took him a moment to realise that the young man had his eyes tightly closed. He cast his own gaze forward and groaned as he realised that Gwen was coming back down the stairs, no more than ten paces away from where he was buried inside of Ianto. After a brief moment of internal debate he smiled.

Drawing in a deep breath of air, Jack draped himself further onto Ianto, licking along the back of his neck, relishing the flavour of his skin when the taste exploded over his tongue. As he neared Ianto's ear he began to whisper, biting down on the skin his mouth came into contact with.

"Ianto, open your eyes and look straight forward."

He watched as Ianto followed his direction, timing his movement by pulling his hips back and thrusting forward the moment the young man saw Gwen.

Ianto screamed and arched his abdomen, his hands curling and digging nails into Jack's arse. Jack gasped at the feeling, pulling back and thrusting forward again, quicker than he had the first time. He saw Gwen pause next to the wall and glance surreptitiously at it, but he ignored her and pulled back again, too caught up in what lay before him to care if she heard them. Ianto's hands grasped his arse tighter and he reached back to seize them.

The feeling was just too intense to let them remain there.

Instead, he captured both of Ianto's wrists in one of his hands and pressed them into his back as he began to thrust in and out of his body, rougher and faster than he intended to. Ianto actually gasped, but to Jack's amazement it was one of pleasure instead of pain. Glancing down, Jack watched his cock as it pressed in and out of Ianto's entrance, nearly laughing when he realised the young man was actually reacting to the way he was holding him by trying to thrust backwards. He slowed down long enough to press Ianto's thighs together and capture the young man's legs between his own. Every time Jack pressed forward he heard Ianto moan in pleasure and it drove his hips faster.

"Fuck Jack...oh God...yes...fuck me..."

The sound of Ianto's whimpers and moans made him speed up even faster as exhilaration spread throughout him. He knew Ianto was getting off on the fact that Jack was restraining his arms and an image that came to his mind of the young man tied up to the very desk he was lying on nearly drove him over the edge.

Jack ran his other hand down Ianto's back, feeling the slick sweat that was now covering his soft skin. A hint of Ianto's scent drifted though his senses making him growl as he curled his hand around Ianto's waist and gripped the young man's erection tightly in his fist. Ianto moaned as he began to stroke him in time to his own thrusts. He heard Ianto let out a low cry of pleasure and he growled again in response.

"Give it up to me Ianto. Come for me..._**right now**_."

It was a command more than anything else, but it also seemed to be just what Ianto needed to hear. Ianto's body tensed under him as he released a loud guttural groan. Slick fluid covered his fist as Ianto's deflating erection continued to twitch in pleasure. His arse tightened, squeezing and quivering around Jack's cock and driving him over the edge as well. He released Ianto's wrists and wrapped his arm around his waist instead, pulling his hips back tightly against his own groin as he shot his essence deep into the young man's body.

Jack's body was still rippling with satisfaction as he collapsed heavily on top of Ianto's back and released a low moan of pleasure. He heard Ianto grunt as his weight rested on top of him, but was too drained to change the direction he'd fallen. After a few moments, his deflating cock slipped from Ianto's arse and he groaned at the loss.

Just as he was starting to regain some of his strength, Ianto chuckled under him. He pulled back and dropped into the chair behind him, pulling Ianto with him and into his lap. When he finally got up enough strength to move again he glanced at Ianto, to see the young man grinning at him.

"I guess we both have an exhibitionist streak, yeah?"

Jack chuckled and nodded his own mouth bending into an answering smile. Just as Ianto curled deeper into his lap and embrace, Jack grasped his chin and pulled his lips to his own. He reached down and grasped Ianto's wrists again, capturing them in one of his hands as he dipped his tongue into the young man's mouth and ran it along his teeth. When he pulled back he saw Ianto staring at him suspiciously.

"Maybe a little bondage fetish as well?" Jack said softly with a teasing tone.

He burst out in laughter as Ianto's face flushed bright red.

----------

TBC

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AN: So was it worth the wait?


	35. Chapter 35 Lies and Misdemeanours

_AN:__ Me and my Americanisms...thank the goddess for Mama Rocks...lol_

_Okay so just to let everyone know, this chapter is what started this whole story. It's the first scene that ever came to mind when I was plotting Anticipation. :)_

_Thanks go to Mama Rocks for helping me out and another great Beta job!_

_

* * *

_Chapter 35 - Lies and Misdemeanours

Ianto had tried to stay quiet...he really did.

The problem was that Owen wouldn't shut the hell up. If he kept up his yammering and whinging, it was going to drive him around the bloody bend. Ever since Jack had told him they were going to the countryside, all of them, Owen had been complaining about one thing after another. At first the complaints had sounded somewhat valid, no one to monitor the rift, why the hell was Ianto going, and such.

Some of the things Ianto had been wondering himself...especially the fact that he was going.

However, Jack had shot down each complaint with a valid answer. He would monitor the rift with his wristband, Ianto was a part of the team and he wanted them all to work on their team building skills...

It had only taken Ianto one glance at Jack's face to know that "team building" wasn't the reason he was going. The truth of it was more basic than that. Jack was still worried about the whole Jasmine situation. He wanted to make sure that he had someone to talk to who wouldn't be snide towards him.

It also didn't help that Ianto and Tosh were the only two who knew they might be camping out there. Ianto had a feeling that Jack might be avoiding telling Owen as his complaining would probably get worse. As for telling Gwen, well she was still testy from the previous few days' actions. She'd exchanged very few words with Jack since he and Ianto had emerged from the archives a few days ago. He'd been amazed to realise the door from the hidden room had led into them. The hallway leading out had been just as hidden as the one they'd entered it from.

After the more logical complaints Owen moved onto the petty ones. Things like who got to sit up front in the SUV and he wanted to make it back in time to go out and find a shag.

Ianto had stayed silent for most of the complaints, but then Owen had made a comment about the smell of the grass. He just couldn't take anymore.

"They have grass in the city Owen. Now would you please quit being so bloody-minded about this case and shut the hell up."

Owen's mouth narrowed into a thin line, but at least he was silent for a while. He started to chuckle when he realised that Owen hadn't ceased talking because Ianto had told him to stop, but because he couldn't seem to come up with a decent snide retort. A quick glance towards Jack had been even more amusing when he saw the other man's lips tug up in the corners as he tried to fight a smile.

When they finally stopped for lunch, Owen had resumed his complaining. However, the plus side of it being lunchtime was that he was able to get Owen to shut up by shoving food into his hands. His mood seemed to be getting better until Jack pointed out that they would be camping. Ianto couldn't stop the irate glare that he sent Jack the moment he let the truth slip out.

Owen's petty complaints had resumed with a vengeance. Once they'd reach the site he must've realised that he was no longer getting a rise out of anyone else, so his complaining shifted direction, instead focusing on Ianto and his supposed lack of planning. He _**was**_ doing a splendid job ignoring or fielding the comments until Owen snapped something rude at Tosh and managed to hurt her enough to make her slump her shoulders with rejection. It took every bit of restraint in Ianto's body not to go over and punch Owen when he'd seen her face fall. Instead of giving in to the urge, he focused on pounding a tent stake further into the ground and trying to ignore everyone around him.

After about five minutes, Gwen apparently got bored. He was just leaning over to grab a camp bed to sit on when she started to play some inane question game.

"So who was the last person you each snogged?"

Ianto felt his whole body tense up at the question, dropping the camp bed just so he could lean over and pick it up again. He glanced over at Jack, only to see him sitting in the open SUV, barely paying attention to what was going on. Without saying anything, he walked slowly over to the place everyone else was sitting and looked at the ground while he joined them.

He listened to their answers, getting more and more aggravated as Gwen grew uncomfortable and Owen more smug. Ianto narrowed his eyes at Jack as he suddenly looked up when Owen stated the last person he kissed was Gwen. The idea that Jack was interested in that fact irritated him almost as much as Owen's arrogant tone. Without any more thought on the issue, he realised how to end this stupid game before he completely lost his sanity. He waited for Jack to field the question in his less than obvious misdirected way, then spoke up with a deliberate lie.

"It's my turn is it?" he said softly as his gaze stayed locked on the ground, "it was Lisa."

He regretted the lie as soon as it left his lips. Jack, whose laughter was so distinctively cheerful only moments before, was no longer even smiling. Instead he was glaring off into the distance, his mouth curved into a scowl. His eyes flicked between Gwen's irritated face and Owen's self-righteous one, laughing slightly as they both shifted uncomfortably.

"Ianto, I'm sorry..." Gwen said so contritely that Ianto almost believed her for a moment.

"Sorry she's dead or sorry you mentioned it?" He said sarcastically as he gazed at the ground then glanced back up at her.

"No...I-I just didn't think..."

He snorted lightly, so low he was sure no one else heard, and smiled sardonically at the sudden awkward expression her face. It surprised him to realise how much pleasure he was getting from her reaction and at how amusing it all was, until he figured out exactly _**why**_ she was looking so uneasy.

"You forgot?" he said quietly, amazed when he managed to keep his voice even.

'_Talk about ridiculous.'_ He thought with a hint of disbelief.

The idea that Gwen could forget about that night was stunning, especially considering how long she had avoided him for after it happened. Of all the things that had happened since he started working for Torchwood, he'd actually found something mindboggling.

He just couldn't believe it was something as simple as _**this**_.

He was so intent on staring at Gwen that he almost missed the angry glare that Jack sent towards him, catching it only in his peripheral vision. The fierce look only lasted a second but it was long enough to make him regret the whole bloody conversation. As Owen and Gwen made some flimsy excuse and took off, Jack finally stared directly at him, but it was an expression Ianto really didn't want to see. Something about that gaze made him uneasy. He could almost swear that Jack wasn't just angry, he also appeared to be immensely hurt. Ianto glanced away from him hurriedly, avoiding the emotions the gaze sent through him.

It didn't work...he could still feel Jack's eyes on him.

He stood up abruptly, walking as quickly as possible towards his tent and not looking back. He didn't care that he had no specific idea of what he was going to do once he got inside it. The only thing that mattered was getting away from that hurtful glare and the guilt it made him feel.

'_I bet he's regretting bringing me now.' _Ianto thought sarcastically as soon as he got inside.

The sound of the wind striking the tent didn't help his mindset. It was an ominous noise, almost cloying the way it drove through him, making him shudder. He ignored the way his mind was telling him to hide in his sleeping bag and glanced around the half empty tent again.

On one hand Ianto was entirely grateful that he had packed the supplies for the trip, considering it meant that he didn't have to sleep in the same place as Owen and Gwen. On the other, he was almost certain that Jack was intending on sharing the tent with him. He just wasn't sure he'd be able to handle the temptation to not give into his baser instincts with Jack so close to him. The best that he could hope for would be that if something did happen, Jack would keep quiet enough for no one else to hear what they were up to. The worst, that Jack would take his newly found knowledge of Ianto's exhibitionist streak and be deliberately loud.

Ianto shook his head lightly, trying to ignore the thrill of pleasure that shot directly into his cock at the idea.

Just as he bent over to look through the only bag he'd brought, he heard someone walk up behind him. He knew it was Jack, but he still nearly jumped out of his skin as the hands came down on his shoulders and whirled him around.

He'd known this argument was coming...hell, he'd _**expected**_ it the moment he saw Jack's face glaring at him after Owen and Gwen had left.

What he wasn't expecting was the feel of Jack's mouth suddenly gliding smoothly over his own. Jack's hand cupped his chin lightly, his tongue teasing at Ianto's lips, forcing entrance and making his knees weak. He felt Jack's other hand cupping his arse, thrusting their pelvises tightly together, as his tongue plundered into his mouth and swept over the roof of it before tangling and battling his own for dominance. The hand cupping his chin moved up and back, tickling along the edge of his ear, before sliding into his hair and gripping it tightly. The fingers tensed, tilting his head as Jack's mouth assaulted his.

He heard and felt a moan come from his throat, only for the noise to be swallowed by Jack's mouth as it pressed closer to his. He couldn't stop the way his own hands curled into fists grasping Jacks great coat so tight that, had he been coherent, he would have worried it would actually rip. Jack growled into his mouth and pressed in deeper, his hips still, even though Ianto's had begun to cant forward.

Just when he thought he was going to pass out from lack of air, Jack pulled his mouth away. It didn't stay gone for very long, only enough for Ianto to suck in a deep gasp of air and nearly drown in the scent of Jack's pheromones as they permeated throughout his senses. After a split second that felt like an eternity, Jack's mouth locked onto Ianto's again, biting and nipping at the curve of his lower lip before suckling on it. Ianto groaned, inhaling sharply, the taste of Jack coating his mouth and tongue until other man was all he could sense or feel. Jack's lips moved up to capture his again, applying a light suction, their teeth bumping rough against one another. Just as he was about to open his mouth to allow Jack's tongue entrance again, he felt a thumb press against his chin, tugging his lips apart. Ianto nearly cringed as he heard another sound come from his chest...

...one that sounded disturbingly like a whimper.

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As much of an effort as it was for Jack to remain in control with the way he was kissing Ianto, he was struggling even harder to not grin with triumph, especially when he heard him whimper. He'd known from the moment he'd walked into the tent and seen Ianto's arse delectably on display in those jeans as he rummaged through a backpack that he was going to get this type of response. However, the fact that Ianto had shown a slight bit of shock when he'd first started kissing him made him wonder what the young man _**thought**_ he was going to do.

He also knew that if he didn't finish what he came in here for, he was going to end up taking Ianto without getting what he wanted.

With a somewhat regretful sigh, he pulled out of the kiss and gazed at Ianto with narrowed eyes. He was rather amused to note that Ianto was completely dazed and apparently still reeling from the kiss. As Jack pulled back even further a look of confusion crossed across the young man's features, making him struggle harder against the urge to laugh. Before Ianto could fully recover, Jack leant forward and spoke in a soft almost gentle voice.

"Who was the last person you snogged Ianto?"

The puzzled expression on Ianto's face grew more intense with each word, but the sight was more arousing than anything else. Ianto's hands struggled at his shoulders, trying to pull him back towards his lips and continue the kiss, but he was obviously still too dazed for it to have much of an effect.

"Jack?" Ianto said with a questioning whimper as he continued to try to pull their lips back together.

Jack smiled smugly at the question and finally took a full step away from Ianto. Despite the fact that Ianto's voice had sounded more pleading than anything else, it was exactly what he had been aiming for. He hadn't been asking if the answer was right, he'd been begging for Jack to continue the kiss. He held out his arms to steady Ianto, making sure he wouldn't fall over without the support he'd been providing for the past few minutes. As soon as he was certain Ianto would remain upright he turned and began moving towards the entrance of the tent.

"Don't forget it this time." He said in a gruff voice as he walked away.

He only made it a few steps before hands grasped tightly at his waist, yanking him backwards at the same time. Ianto growled next to his ear as he pressed his erection flush against Jack's arse, his hands moving down to cup his hard cock through his trousers. Jack moaned, his head dropping back and landing in the cradle of Ianto's neck as he thrust his hips forward and back, unable to figure out which felt better.

"Really Jack? You know, it wasn't exactly like you told the truth either..." Ianto whispered with a lust induced voice in his ear.

Jack growled as he thrust his hips forward. He knew Ianto had a valid point, but something about the look on his face when he'd lied to the others had gotten to him. Maybe Jack would have been able to overlook it if Ianto hadn't sounded so heart wrenching as he admitted that Lisa was his last kiss. He shook his head and abruptly turned around, pressing their pelvises flush against each other again, making sure their erections slid tantalisingly along one another.

Ianto moaned, his hands moving to Jack's arse to hold him where he was. When it appeared certain that Jack wasn't going anywhere, one of his hands moved to the front of Jack's trousers, deftly undoing the catch. He pulled away and glanced down in surprise when he encountered more fabric blocking his goal.

"Since when do you wear underwear Jack?" Ianto tilted his head and smiled as another thought apparently occurred to him.

"Actually, the better question would be...since when do you own any underwear at all?"

Jack grinned back at him, his eyes sparkling with amusement as he threw back his head and laughed. He had never considered himself unpredictable, so being able to surprise Ianto gave him an inordinate amount of pleasure. He'd been living for way too long to start changing things now. That thought brought him up short and he stopped laughing as he suddenly began to study the young man in his arms.

If he really thought about it, Ianto _**had**_ managed to change something in him. When he used to reminisce about his past, it would be with a longing to finally lay to rest, or for lack of better words, to die. However, now that he had Ianto in his life, he found himself luxuriating in things he had completely forgotten about. For the past few months he had been so intent on the seduction, the drive to get Ianto into his bed, that he had failed to notice he was enjoying things that he hadn't allowed himself to even think about in a very long time. Small things like plotting ways to make someone else smile or laugh, being with someone long enough to find out all their little kinks and turn-on's, even holding and watching a lover as they slept.

Hell, Ianto had even made him start to relish the flavour of coffee when it exploded over his taste buds. For as long as he could remember, coffee had just been something he drank in order to wake up in the morning. The worst part about it all was that Jack hadn't realised exactly how much he missed these types of things until they'd suddenly reappeared in his life.

Ianto had managed to turn his world around and he hadn't even noticed it was happening.

Jack closed his eyes slowly, his brow furrowing as he concentrated on the way Ianto felt, wrapped up in his arms. It amazed him to realise that the situation didn't feel as awkward as it should have. In fact, Ianto felt like he fit perfectly in his embrace, almost too perfectly.

As if he belonged there...

Jack was so busy concentrating that he nearly jumped when he felt fingertips brushing lightly between his eyebrows. He opened his eyes to find Ianto staring at him with a look of speculation on his own face. Ianto opened his mouth slightly, then abruptly closed it again, biting on his lower lip with hesitation. Jack watched him closely as several emotions cascaded across his features. After a few more seconds he apparently made up his mind and opened his mouth to say something. Before he could get out any words Jack leant over and captured his lips again.

It didn't take nearly as long for Ianto to reciprocate as it did the first time. Within moments his hands slid quickly up Jack's back, gripping the short strands of his hair tightly between his fingers. Jack gasped, his tongue thrusting harshly into Ianto's mouth as he clenched his fists even tighter, tugging it almost painfully. His own hands moved down to the swell of Ianto's arse, clutching the muscular jean clad globes tightly in his palms and groaning with pleasure as their erections pressed against one another again.

Ianto's fingers tightened again briefly, just long enough to draw another deep gasp from Jack, sucking up the air that the young man released in a harsh pant. He loosened his hands from Jack's hair, running the tips of his fingers down his chest, stopping briefly to tweak the hard pebbled nipples they came into contact with, before continuing downward. Just as Ianto was about to pull his erection from its confines, Jack heard Owen shouting in the distance. Ianto had obviously heard him as well because he yanked his body away and turned towards the back of the tent. He was still gasping for air when Tosh threw open the tent and came walking in unannounced.

Tosh froze, her eyes flicking hastily between Jack and Ianto. After a moment longer her confused gaze settled on Jack's face.

"Owen and Gwen found a body." She said in a near whisper.

Jack nodded in assent, realising a moment too late that she hadn't seen it. She had already turned and left as soon as she finished speaking. He started to sigh, wondering vaguely if she assumed they were fighting until he heard Ianto sniggering lightly over his shoulder. He glanced towards him with his eyebrows raised in question, only to see Ianto point towards his trousers. His eyes followed the direction Ianto indicated, laughter bubbling out of his chest when he saw his trousers were hanging open, his erection pressing heavily against the fabrics of the boxer briefs.

"I think Tosh probably knows what's going on now." Ianto said with an amused tint to his voice as he kept chuckling.

Jack buttoned up his trousers as he walked towards Ianto. The moment he reached the young man he leant forward and brushed their lips lightly against one another before pulling back and walking towards the opening in the tent. Just before he stepped through it he heard Ianto speak softly behind him.

"Later?"

He nodded as a thrill of anticipation shot through him.

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TBC

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_AN: Hard to believe it all started with __**this**__ huh? Feedback and reviews appreciated, but I do understand if you choose not to leave anything! Some of the things you guys reply with amuse me to no end…lol. :)_


	36. Chapter 36 Stumbling Through it All

_AN: First, don't kill me for this chapter. It's heavy on the angst and probably somewhat depressing. But things have to progress..._

_Thanks go to Mama Rocks for such a great Beta job! I changed up one or two things after she sent it back so any mistakes beyond that would be my fault...lol._

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Chapter 36 - Stumbling Through it All

Jack grunted, his arms tightening around Ianto momentarily as a low buzzing filled the air. His hand shot out quickly searching the bedside table for whatever was making the sound. He kept his eyes tightly closed, not quite yet wanting to admit a new day, especially considering it felt like they'd just barely gone to sleep.

His fingers closed tightly over a small rectangular item, nearly dropping it when it vibrated again in his palm. His mind was so completely sleep addled that it took him a few seconds to realise he was holding Ianto's mobile in his hand. As soon as he did he started pressing random buttons, trying to get it to stop its inane buzzing.

He finally cracked an eye open when the phone abruptly switched from vibrating mildly to issuing an irritatingly glaring shrill noise. Before he could figure out exactly what he had done wrong, Ianto's hand burst from under the covers, grabbing and effectively silencing the offending instrument. Jack watched with both eyes open now, heavy amusement cascading throughout him as Ianto dropped the phone to the floor and rolled over, issuing a soft snore as he did so. He chuckled under his breath as Ianto burrowed further under the covers, his hands moving up to settle below the pillow his head was resting on.

The image of Ianto looking so innocent and so relaxed sent a thrill of arousal throughout him that he couldn't quite explain. After a moment of debate he shifted closer towards Ianto's warmth and reached up to twine the short strands of his hair between his fingers. When Ianto failed to respond, he began to map out the features of his face with his fingers, almost as if he was trying to memorise them by touch alone, being careful to avoid the various cuts that he'd sustained that day. After tracing over his eyebrows, he ran them down along the bridge of Ianto's nose, smiling as he reached the small dip that coalesced into the endearing bulbous end that always reminded him of a newborn. The tips of his fingers moved down further, outlining along the edges of his lips and causing Ianto to pout slightly as he released a soft sigh.

"Jack..."

Jack's eyes widened slightly at the sound, his smile growing wider. He moved his hand again, allowing his palm to run tenderly across Ianto's cheek, cupping it gently. Ianto's face tilted towards his touch as he sighed again, smiling contentedly in his sleep, causing Jack to suck in a deep breath of air at the sight. For reasons he didn't want to focus on, the way that Ianto was reacting to his touch, even in his sleep, was beginning to make his heart stutter with emotion.

He closed his eyes for a moment, his fingers still caressing Ianto's face as he tried to sort out the thoughts that had been plaguing him for nearly ten hours. Ever since he had paused in shooting at those insane lunatic cannibals and turned to seen Ianto bound and gagged on the floor, he'd been running on immense fear and sheer rage. He'd turned back towards the degenerate cop who was _**actually**_ trying to go for his gun and fired one more time, just barely realising that he'd aimed for his hand when he should have shot the arrogant vermin in the heart. In that instant, he honestly wished he'd gone more for kill shots when he first came into the place. It had only taken a split second for him to realise exactly how close he'd been to losing the young man, as well as the rest of his team, and it terrified him to no end. To be perfectly honest, he was still regretting allowing Gwen to talk him out of killing the bastards who'd put them _**all**_ there like that.

He should have just ignored her pleas and annihilated the lot of them on the spot. Especially since he knew she wasn't going to get the answer she wanted. She had been looking to find some sort of logic in the midst of all that madness, when he could have just told her that she would never find it. Logic and reason left life when it came to situations like that. This was probably his motivation for only giving her five minutes with the psychotic freak instead of the full hour she asked for.

'_She should feel grateful that she got that much! You can't get something from nothing and those animals were the __**definition**__ of nothing.'_ his mind supplied as his eyes slowly opened back up.

Jack focused his gaze back on Ianto, silently willing him to wake up and look at him with those startlingly blue-gray irises. He knew he should let him get some rest, but the yearnings inside of him were nearly overwhelming, almost to the point of painful. They ripped through him violently...he wanted to see Ianto smile at him, to feel the pressure of his body against his own, to hear him moan Jack's name in pleasure.

Above everything else though, he _**needed**_ to reassure himself that Ianto _**was**_ alive and well.

The strength of that need startled him, making him quickly draw his hand away from Ianto's face. Ianto shuddered, whimpering softly in his sleep at the swift movement, but Jack was too lost in the uneasy feeling that had suddenly settled into his bones to take notice. It concerned him that he hadn't noticed, that somewhere in the midst of all the madness that Torchwood brought down on them, Jack had lost complete control over the situation.

It didn't matter how much he struggled or how often he denied what he was feeling. The truth of the matter was, he already cared for Ianto way too much. He could still honestly say that he wasn't in love with the young man, but he was certainly hurdling in that very direction.

There was something else that was niggling at his mind, something he'd noticed from when he was kissing Ianto in the tent as well. Ianto was most assuredly starting to care about him too. Which, if he was honest with himself he noticed it happening, had watched it progress and had been unable to stop it, no matter what he did. He was still uncertain as to how their relationship had progressed to this area already. Jack had witnessed the lengths to which Ianto would go to protect those he loved when they had found Lisa. Once his care was established it would not be easy to shake it free.

Which would end up being problematic at best and heart wrenching at worst.

Because what it all came down to was that everything would be excruciatingly painful in the end. The simple fact was, he still needed answers from the Doctor, and even if he didn't find him within Ianto's lifetime, the young man would still eventually die and leave him behind. The only reason he'd lost touch with his humanity in the first place was because he was tired of losing people, tired of living lifetime after lifetime with nothing to show for it but pain and heartache in the end. One of them would be left behind, hurt and alone. That's how it always ended...

Making a decision, Jack sat up and turned back to look at Ianto. He knew that what he planned was going to be painful for both of them, but he also knew that if he didn't start pulling away now he would end up regretting it. He would take tonight and make it one for Ianto to remember, as well as a time he himself could be completely happy, however fleeting it would be.

Fully awake now, Jack reached out and ran the tips of his fingers up Ianto's jaw line, softening the touch as soon as he reached the young man's ear. He tickled it lightly, chuckling as Ianto snuffled and reached up to bat his hand away, despite the fact that it was already gone. Jack repeated the action, a mischievous grin covering his lips as Ianto grunted and rubbed at his ear. Just as he reached forward to do it one more time, Ianto's hand snagged his own and drew the tips of his fingers to his lips.

Jack's eyes snapped back to Ianto's face to find the young man gazing up at him, a soft smile playing against his mouth as he nuzzled the fingertips, his tongue flicking out lightly over each one. When he reached Jack's middle finger he sucked it gently between his lips allowing his teeth to graze the skin lightly.

Jack groaned softly and deliberately closed his eyes. It hurt to even look at him and he was worried that Ianto would see that something was off if he kept their gazes locked. Ianto released his middle finger and switched to his index finger, his tongue circling the tip seductively before drawing it fully into his mouth. He shuddered, his eyes tightened until it almost felt as if he wouldn't be able to open them again if he tried. He felt Ianto release his hand hesitantly, pulling it away from his lips at the same time.

"Jack?"

The insecurity in Ianto's voice made him realise how poor a job he was doing at hiding his thoughts. He shook his head lightly, instinctively flipping his hand around and grasping Ianto's within it, intertwining their fingers tightly together. He took a moment to focus all of his energy on why he was choosing the path he was about to take, then violently shoved it all out of his mind.

It took a little longer then he would have liked, but after a couple of minutes he opened his eyes and smiled. Ianto tilted his head slightly and opened his mouth, but before he could get any words out Jack leant forward and captured his lips with his own.

He poured everything he felt into the kiss, his tongue flicking out to tease at Ianto's mouth until he relented and opened up for him. Ianto returned the favour, his own tongue flicking out to meet with Jack's tangling wetly with it. Jack could taste his own desperation and concentrated on not allowing Ianto to discern it.

He felt a thrill of unease go through him when Ianto pushed him away suddenly, but it disappeared when he saw a blush creep up the young man's face. Jack thrust the feeling away and smiled again at Ianto, reaching forward to run the back of his fingers down Ianto cheek.

"What is it Ianto? What do you want?"

Ianto gazed at him shyly then closed his eyes. In any other time he might have relished the look that was reflected in Ianto's expression, but for right now he was too worried to see the amusement in the situation. After a split second Ianto reopened his eyes and grinned somewhat impishly at him.

"Can I...I mean, would you let me..." As Ianto spoke his face went from slightly flushed to completely red.

Jack quirked his eyebrows, watching Ianto's face questioningly while remaining quiet. He knew that Ianto would eventually get out whatever it was that he wanted to ask him, he just had to be patient. After a few more seconds when Ianto opened and closed his mouth several times, a look of determination came over his face. Reaching forward he yanked Jack down and covered his body with his own, thrusting his hips roughly forward. His lips met Jack's possessively, taking control and making Jack growl with the lust that suddenly consumed him. When they were both breathing heavily, Ianto pulled away and reached down to grip Jack's wrists in his hands, raising them above his head and holding him down.

"I'm going to tie you up Sir."

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Ianto grinned as Jack sucked in a deep breath of air, his irises growing so dark with lust that they all but took over the blue haze. Jack nodded his head in assent, apparently unable to respond, but still wanting to show that he approved of the idea.

It was at that nod that Ianto began to look around the room, trying to figure out exactly what he was going to use to follow through with his plan. On the one hand he didn't have to worry about getting their clothes out of the way, since they had both climbed into Jack's bed nude. On the other though, every time Jack struggled against him it was distracting. He glanced back down at Jack, releasing his wrists at the same time and climbed out of the bed. As Jack's gaze travelled up and down his body he saw something strange flicker in his eyes. It was gone as quickly as it had appeared, but it still brought back the odd behaviour Jack had been exhibiting when he first woke up.

'_Whatever it is, I'll ask him later.'_ He thought blithely as he turned to look around the room.

Jack apparently knew what he was looking for. As he turned back Jack leaned over and opened a cabinet with a various array of items in it. He paused, his eyebrow raised in question, if not a little bit of suspicion, until Jack reached into the cupboard and pulled out a receipt and shoved it in his hands. Apparently everything in the cupboard had been purchased the day after they'd left that secret room. Chuckling lightly, Ianto knelt down and began delving around the cabinet, pulling out several different items. He saw Jack out of his peripheral vision trying to lean around him and spoke with a low warning in his voice.

"Sit back and _**don't**_ make me tell you again Sir."

Ianto turned around long enough to get his point across, a brief thrill of pleasure running through him when he saw Jack shudder. Once he was certain that Jack was going to follow his order, he resumed rummaging with a soft smile on his face, pulling out a couple of fur lined cuffs and a small teardrop shaped ring, piling them carefully on the floor. He debated for a second then grabbed a blindfold before standing back onto his feet and turning to face Jack.

His smile faltered for a moment until he felt Jack's hand capture his, squeezing it reassuringly then releasing it again. Jack pulled back, sitting on the edge of the bed obediently waiting for Ianto's orders.

"Stand up and face the ladder." He said trying to sound as authoritative as he could, yet unable to shake the feeling that he sounded foolish.

The sensation disappeared as Jack hastened to do as he was told, standing up and reaching forward to grip the sides of the ladder. Ianto stood next to him and raised up the blindfold, deftly slipping it over his head. Jack gripped the bars tightly in his fists and drew in a deep breath, his whole body tensing up. He started to turn around and grab the restraints when he paused and leant forward, whispering into Jack's ear.

"Safe word Sir?"

Jack tilted his head towards Ianto's voice, his lips quirked up in a half smile as he apparently tried to think of an answer. After a moment of apparent debate, he turned towards Ianto and drew their lips together by feel alone. Ianto allowed it, but not for long. He pulled out of the kiss and pushed Jack backwards, holding him against the ladder.

"Jack?" Ianto said with warning in his voice again.

Jack started to chuckle, the sound abruptly tuning into a moan when Ianto's palm smacked lightly against his arse. His hips bucked forward uncontrollably as his cock began to harden. Ianto reached down and ran his fingertip along the top of it, smiling as he felt Jack's erection throb underneath the touch. Jack started to reach out and Ianto pulled back away from him, chuckling when Jack's arms flailed uselessly.

Jack sighed and dropped his arms turning back towards the ladder. Once he was back in the same position, Ianto took a step forward and waited patiently next to him, making certain every breath of air he exhaled moved over his bare skin, pebbling slightly.

After a moment Jack finally whispered a word softly under his breath. Ianto pulled away as soon as he heard it and turned to grab one the leather cuffs. He worked quickly and somewhat methodically as he secured Jack's wrists to the ladder. He ran his hands lightly up Jack's arms, testing the restraints and making sure he couldn't get loose, before moving to his back and running his fingertips along the muscles.

Ianto curled his fingers allowing his nails to scratch along Jack's back, being careful not to break the skin but still leaving red trails along their wake. Jack's body froze, stuttering under his touch. He moved his hands forward, wrapping them around until he had access to Jack's chest, his palm covered hard pebbled nipples. Wrapping his thumb and forefinger around each one, he twisted them lightly, fully rewarded when Jack's hips thrust back into his.

He continued teasing him, tweaking and pinching until Jack was groaning heavily, his head dropping to his chest. Ianto finally released him, running his nails down Jack's abdomen until he reached his erection to find it hard and weeping. He chuckled lightly in his ear as he grasped Jack's cock and pumped it a few times. Jack gasped at the sudden movement, his hips thrusting forward into the movement. Once he was certain he was completely distracted, he slipped the small silver ring over Jack's cock and balls.

He released Jack completely and took a step away from him, taking in the sight before him with more pleasure than he thought he should, but pleased nonetheless. He felt more laughter bubble up from his throat as Jack shifted backwards and the cock rings smooth teardrop edge rubbed against his perineum, making him gasp in pleasure. Before Jack could shift again, Ianto leant forward and growled low and hoarse into his ear.

"You don't come until I do Jack..."

Jack gasped at the words, his hips starting to shift again. Ianto's hands grasped his waist, stilling the movement before it could go far enough to allow any pleasure.

"Ianto...please..." Jack said suddenly, his voice a near whimper.

He grinned softly at the sound, keeping his hands on Jack's hips and making sure he couldn't move them. Just as Jack whimpered again he leant forward and ran his teeth along his neck, biting down and sucking hard enough to leave a small love bite. He pulled away just long enough to speak clearly and authoritatively.

"Shall we start Sir?"

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TBC

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_An: Seriously, don't hurt me...We all know Jack does some things without thinking them all the way through! :) Feedback appreciated, though I understand if don't have time. The story will get written either way!_


	37. Chapter 37 Finding the Line

AN: So I know I disappeared off the face of the earth for a while. I am sorry...really. I had a lot going on in my life and unfortunately it kind of took over for a while. I am back to writing now though! I have the next chapter outlined and I'm currently working on it.

Just as a warning, this chapter deals with quite a bit of BDSM. If you don't want to read it you don't have to. I don't think you'll miss anything of big consequence. There's another scene coming up in the shower and then one final chapter (maybe 2) of Anticipation. After that I'll move onto the sequel. I hope you enjoy it!

Thanks goes to MamaRocks for helping me out so much and being so tolerant of me these past few weeks! She did a great beta job!

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Chapter 37 -Finding the Line

Jack's whole body shuddered at Ianto's words, his mind a jumble of sensation. With the blindfold taking away all his visual consciousness, every other sensation was beginning to clarify into extremely sharp focus. Even the soft grazing of Ianto's lips against his skin stood out and drove jagged sparks of pleasure straight into his cock.

He felt Ianto's fingers sweep slowly along his side before curving around to lightly caress his stomach and growled in response. A soft chuckle echoed in his ear accompanied by a tickle of air and he growled again, struggling against the bonds that held him tightly to the ladder. He was quickly losing patience with the slowness of the young man's seduction.

"Ianto..."

His voice trailed away, slipping into a low groan as Ianto suddenly wrapped his other hand around Jack's erection. He tugged lightly on it a few times then released Jack completely and suddenly, taking a step away.

Jack whipped his head around pointlessly, trying to figure out where Ianto had gone. He was seriously starting to regret allowing Ianto to blindfold him. Without visual stimulation, his mind had abruptly gone into overdrive. Thoughts that he would have normally avoiding began coming to the surface in a way that would have made him shudder if they had occurred to him at any other time. Like the fact that he had given Ianto complete control over his body, or that when Ianto had asked him for permission to tie him up, he hadn't even hesitated before agreeing.

It was a testimony to how deeply he'd let Ianto into his life. Something he'd been trying to avoid doing for months now.

A sharp stinging slap from the palm of Ianto's hand landed on his arse and he jerked forward gasping as the pain shot pleasure straight through to his leaking cock.

"You need to stop thinking Jack. Stop wondering what I'm doing. Stop fighting me."

Ianto's fingers returned to travel down his spine, carefully mapping out every vertebra. Just as Ianto reached the soft curve that arched into his arse, he curled his fingers, allowing his nails to graze Jack's skin. Jack knew without a doubt that with the pressure he exerted there had to be red trails left behind. He gasped again, the sensation not quite painful but definitely enough to make him arch both away and towards it. The cock ring pressed against his perineum and he heard a sound that was disturbingly close to a whimper come from his lips.

"Ianto...quit fucking teasing me!"

Ianto chuckled again from somewhere over his left shoulder and he whipped his head towards the noise, tightening his fingers around the ring of the ladder he was tethered to.

"That sounded a little like an order..." he heard Ianto say softly from the opposite side of where he was facing.

He pivoted his head again towards the younger man only to hear another chuckle come from where he'd just turned away.

"Problem is sir, I don't think you're actually in a position to make any demands from me right now. Do you?"

Ianto's fingers returned, running down the side of Jack's face and tracing along his jaw line. They began to glide across his lips and Jack swiped his tongue out, drawing one deep into the recess of his mouth. He heard Ianto sigh softly before starting to withdraw his hand away. Jack captured the soft digit between his teeth, not allowing him to pull away. He began to smirk around it, then gasped suddenly and released it as another sharp smack landed against his arse.

"I'm making the rules, you have absolutely no say in the matter. Quit trying to take control from me Jack."

Suddenly, Jack gasped as he felt Ianto's body drape over his own, covering him completely from behind. It was almost as if Ianto had engulfed him entirely. The smell of the young man teased at his senses, permeating the air around him and coating his tongue with each breath of air he gasped in. Ianto's hard cock nestled snugly between Jack's arse cheeks as warm arms wrapped around his waist, pulling their bodies flush against one another. The sensations grew even more intense when Ianto's velvety smooth lips closed over his earlobe, nipping and suckling at it. Jack moaned aloud causing him to nearly miss the soft whisper that Ianto spoke with in his ear.

"Relax..."

His eyes slammed shut, tension running through every muscle as Ianto began to leisurely move his hips in a slow circular thrust, his cock sliding smoothly between the cheeks of his arse. He felt his muscles clench at the feeling, sharp spikes of pleasure radiating throughout him. After a few languorous thrusts Jack began to lose conciseness of everything around him. The only thing he could focus on was the feel of Ianto's body against his.

Despite that feeling, his mind still refused to relinquish. Every bone in his body demanded he not listen to Ianto's command and to take back control of the situation. It was completely against his moral fibre to submit in the way that Ianto expected him to.

He felt his jaw clench in frustration, his eyes tightening beneath the blindfold as he thrust back against Ianto almost unconsciously. He had just barely managed to complete one rotation of his hips before Ianto grasped them forcefully keeping them still within his palms. Ianto's nails bit into his flesh, his fingers pressing tight enough to leave bruises as he gasped in surprise and his hips stilled.

Ianto began to pull away, pausing as he heard Jack groan in frustration. Before Jack knew what was going on he felt another sharp stinging slap against his arse making him gasp with surprise as Ianto put more space between them. Jack's eyes flew open in surprise only to be confronted with more darkness as the blindfold remained in place.

For a brief moment, he felt the obscurity overwhelming him until he heard Ianto release a quiet sigh behind him. A low rustling whispered aside him and he whimpered as Ianto smoothly slid between his body and the ladder. He had no idea what Ianto was doing, but he pressed forward in an attempt to increase the contact between them. Ianto's palm pressed against his chest, holding him back as he leant forward and brushed an almost chaste kiss over his mouth. Ianto's lips travelled across his cheek until he reached Jack's ear, brushing so lightly along his skin that it was nearly imperceptible.

"Just give in Jack." Ianto murmured, his breath skimming along the ridge of Jack's ear as he spoke.

When Jack failed to do as he was told he heard Ianto whisper again, this time with a pleading note to his voice.

"Trust me...please..."

He shook his head minutely in response, struggling to follow wherever Ianto was trying to lead him. The problem was, he couldn't even make a valid attempt to follow the orders. There was something inside of him, holding him back. He was acutely aware of a fear that seemed to be coating the edge of his refusal, a dread that was almost tangible, bitter and unyielding. He knew without a doubt that if he relinquished, he would lose a battle that he had been fighting ever since he met Ianto in that dark and wild forest. One that seemed to be relentlessly raging between his heart and his logical mind.

He winced as he realised he could practically feel the terror spreading throughout every nerve in his body like a virus, tensing his muscles to a rigidity that practically put his aroused cock to shame.

Jack gasped aloud, the coiling in his body coming to an abrupt halt when he felt warm fingers wrap tightly around his wrists, just above where they were tethered. His right hand went completely lax as he felt a thumb slide smoothly between the cuff and his skin, pressing down gently on the centre of his wrist.

He gasped, a wave of fire racing through his veins, ebbing the tension out of his body as it moved. His mind went utterly blank, hazy and unfocussed in a way that he had completely forgotten existed. He felt Ianto's opposite thumb slide under the leather and press down the same way and it snapped the world back for a split second, just in time to understand the next words the young man spoke.

"Pressure point?"

Jack nodded heavily, barely able to move his head and he heard Ianto chuckle in response. He felt Ianto apply a slight bit more pressure and all the air left his lungs with a heavy gasp, completely forgetting to inhale afterwards. Jack's thoughts began to drift, struggling to find some form of concentration as his body began to protest. He had no idea why, but he was getting extremely woozy. It was only as Ianto leant forward, pressing his lips lightly against Jack's ear and spoke that he realised what was going on.

"Breathe Jack...just breathe."

The lightheaded feeling that was starting to overcome him disappeared as he gasped in a rush of air, completely filling his lungs, before letting it go again. It released from his body slowly, his muscles losing all their tension as it left. He found himself relaxing against Ianto until he was utterly sedate, trusting him to support his weight completely. His mind settled into a haze of quiet content, aware only of Ianto and the way the young man's skin felt pressed against him and the hard cock gliding smoothly along his own erection.

Ianto's hands released his wrists and began to travel lightly over his body, mapping out every bit of skin they encountered, brushing it with the barest of caresses. Jack sighed, drifting further away, aware of every stroke that whispered over his body. He was so lost in the sensation that he barely realised when Ianto slipped out from in front of him. He collapsed against the ladder with nothing but the leather wristbands holding him up.

Warm hands cupped his arse lightly, squeezing and caressing before smoothing over where Ianto had smacked earlier. Jack relaxed into the touch, pushing back towards Ianto without even realising he was going to do it. Fire cascaded throughout him as Ianto pulled back and slapped his arse again, lighter than he had previously. He moved his hips towards the sensation, unaware of anything but the tingling imprint it left behind. Ianto breathed heavily against his neck, murmuring quietly with arousal coating his words.

"That's much better Jack. Just a matter of finding the right subspace..."

Jack's head shot up at the words, his mind clearing as Ianto's hands released his arse. It had been a very long time since he'd gotten that close to letting go and the idea of submerging fully into subspace was just too terrifying for him to comprehend. He found the strength returning to his body again and stood up on his own, using the rung of the ladder to pull himself upright. The moment he regained his stance Ianto pressed flush against his back, draping over him completely. His hands ran up Jack's arms and wrapped tightly around his wrists for a second time. Jack's legs wobbled beneath him as Ianto's thumbs pressed down with solid intent.

"You're still thinking a little too much Jack. However..."

Ianto paused, breathing in and out slowly next to Jack's ear. The air ghosted over Jack's skin and made him shiver as he felt goose pimples rise in response. Just as he was beginning to wonder what the young man was going to do, Ianto gave a low laugh and continued.

"I think I know how to still that overactive mind of yours sir."

Ianto released his wrists and Jack heard a soft shuffling behind him. He barely had a moment's notice before he felt the cheeks of his arse being parted and a warm wet tongue pressed against his entrance. Pleasure exploded throughout him, his whole frame shuddering at the fire that was suddenly racing straight into his cock, making it throb heavily. Ianto's tongue teased at his entrance, circling and pressing forward, breeching the muscled ring, slowly fucking in and out of it.

"Oh fuck...Ianto...Christ...yes!"

Jack thrust his hips back towards the invasion and Ianto allowed it, pulling his cheeks further apart as his tongue sped up thrusting in and out. His hands gripped the rung of the ladder, every shift of his hips causing the cock ring to rub against him, increasing the inferno that was shooting throughout his body. Every muscle in his body tightened with anticipation as he hurdled towards the precipice, his heart hammering against his ribs. He thrust back one more time and growled out in frustration when the warm metal slid roughly against his perineum and completely denied the completion his body sought.

"Fuck! Ianto...I...I need..."

Ianto's tongue suddenly pulled completely out of him without warning. He heard the young man chuckle as his lips glided across to one of Jack's arse cheeks and nipped at it, his teeth biting into the soft flesh almost harshly. Jack growled as the pain flared along his skin, sending a bolt of sheer pleasure through his cock. As Ianto moved across to his other arse cheek Jack heard another sound erupt from his mouth, this time disturbingly like a whine.

At that sound, Ianto began to slowly work his way up Jack's back, his lips and tongue nipping and suckling every bit of skin they encountered. Jack shuddered, whimpering again as Ianto reached the back of his neck and closed his lips around the top of his spine. Ianto's teeth bit down hard into the flesh, his lips applying a suction which was hard and brutal enough to leave a mark. Jack's hips thrust forward at the ruthlessness of the action, his whole body arching both away and towards the painful sensation. Just as the pain started to become almost unbearable, Ianto released him and ran his tongue soothingly over the area.

Jack struggled against his bonds for a moment, arousal coursing through his body in sharp agonizing spasms. He heard a continuous whingeing coming from somewhere and just barely realised the noise was coming from his own lips as Ianto's voice began to shush him comfortingly.

"Shhh...It's okay Jack...this will help..."

The soft welsh tones began to penetrate his arousal, at the same moment he felt a slick finger against his entrance. Jack felt the digit press forward and breach the tight ring of muscle completely to the knuckle in one smooth thrust. He groaned as Ianto began thrusting in and out of his body, barely noticing when he added another finger into the mix. It was only as Ianto added a third finger that he realised how much the young man was actually holding back. Jack's body was thrumming, on the edge of coming with no way to discharge the tension. He remembered the young man's earlier demand and gasped as he realised that Ianto was really going to deny that release to him, for as long as it took.

"Ianto please! Oh God..."

* * *

Ianto smiled at Jack's words, grateful for the fact that the other man couldn't see it. It had taken way too long to break down Jack's defences, but it had been well worth it when he finally had. Finding his pressure point helped more than anything else. It still amused him that Jack thought of him as innocent in so many ways. Even though it was true that he had never had sex with or been attracted to men before Jack, that didn't mean he hadn't learnt a few things or tried other aspects of sex with Lisa.

Jack's moans and groans had begun filling the room from the moment that Ianto's hands had started on his body. Even though it had taken a little while to figure out, Ianto had realised that Jack had no idea of the noises he was making. He was also fairly certain that the other man wasn't even aware how long they'd been playing this little game of theirs, despite the fact that he'd had Jack tied up for the better part of an hour and a half.

Ianto curved his fingers, nearly laughing aloud when he heard Jack gasp as they ran over his prostate for the first time. As soon as Jack's body thrust back at the sensation he yanked his fingers from the other man's body. More than anything he wanted to claim Jack, own him in a way that he never had before. Every other time in the past, he'd always held a part of himself separate, ashamed of his attraction and lust for the other man. However, once Jack had agreed to let him tie him up everything had suddenly seemed to become crystal clear.

Ianto poured the last of the tube of lube into his palm and grasped his erection, slicking it up as quickly as possible. Jack was saying something but he couldn't comprehend or distinguish quite what the words were through the heat of arousal coursing throughout him. Despite the fact that he didn't understand the words, he knew Jack hadn't once said his safe word. He made sure to listen for it just in case he pushed Jack too far.

Leaning forward, practically draping his body over Jack's, he grasped his erection and pressed forward against the other mans entrance. As the heat and tightness of Jack's body began to envelop his cock, he groaned low in his throat. Pleasure flooded through his body, fiery and consuming in a way that he'd never felt before. As the head of his cock popped fully into Jack's body, Ianto heard the other man gasp and groan at the same time. He paused where he was, closing his eyes and drawing in a deep breath of air, fighting for all the self control he knew his body possessed, despite how far away it seemed at the moment. As soon as he was certain he had himself in check, he opened his eyes and fixed on the man in front of him.

Ianto moaned as the image before him came into focus.

Jack looked stunning, there was no other way to describe him. His head was arched back against Ianto's shoulder as his fingers gripped the rail of the ladder tightly. He was gasping quietly, a continuous stream of the word yes flowing from his lips over and over. There was a light sheen of sweat coating his arched neck that begged for Ianto to lean forward and run his tongue along the column of his throat. Ianto leant towards him and did just that, relishing the way the flavour of Jack's pheromones exploded over his taste buds.

Just as Ianto began to move his lips towards Jack's ear he felt the other man push his hips back. Ianto followed the movement easily, chuckling low in his throat when Jack growled with frustration. He smiled to himself, amused to note that he was finally starting to recognise some of Jack's tricks and divert them when he wanted to. Jack's chest rumbled with discontent as he tried again, moving quicker, only to fail for a second time.

Ianto's lips closed over Jack's earlobe biting down before working it gently between his teeth, his tongue darting forward to flick against the flesh. His arms wrapped around Jack, crisscrossing across his chest as he pulled their bodies nearly flush together, being careful to keeps their hips at the same distance. He heard Jack whimper faintly as his coarse chest hair came in contact with the other man's glistening smooth skin.

"Ianto, please..."

Ianto chuckled around Jack's ear, releasing it as he ran his hands up the muscled plains of Jack's chest and captured each of his nipples between his thumbs and forefingers. His fingers tweaked then twisted each hard peak at the same time that he pressed forward, sheathing his cock the rest of the way into Jack's body. Jack released a long guttural groan as he moved, his body frozen in place.

Ianto flicked Jack's nipples with his fingertips before releasing them and running his palms up the other man's arms wrapping his hands around his wrists again. He felt Jack shudder as he pressed his thumbs down, reminding him exactly who was in charge of the situation. Jack growled in acquiescence and remained still, seemingly waiting to see what Ianto was going to do. Ianto released his wrists and covered Jack's hands on the rung of the ladder with his own. He buried his face against Jack's neck, inhaling deeply before trusting himself to go on. When he was finally under control, the fire coursing through his body tamped down enough, he whispered Jack's name against his skin. The sound of his own voice startled him as he heard arousal coating it, sounding sexy even to his own ears.

It was just enough to shatter what little control he had left. Without moving he whispered Jack's name again. When Jack nodded, he spoke in the same soft gravelly voice that he barely recognized as his own.

"Fuck yourself on my cock Jack. Make me come."

Jack growled and moved his hips, pulling away from Ianto's cock and pressing back onto it fast and hard. Ianto tightened his fingers around Jack's, gasping harshly as the sensation of snug heat stroked over his erection. His hands dropped back to Jack's wrists and wrapped around them as he spoke again.

"Go slow Jack. I want to feel every part of you," he paused then pressed his thumbs down on Jack's pressure points as he continued, "and I want you to feel every part of me."

Jack released a harsh sob at his words, but followed his direction on the next thrust. He pulled his hips away slowly, the smooth cavern of his body gripping Ianto's cock as it fought against the loss, before pushing back. Ianto shifted slightly as Jack pressed back, aware of the way the head of his shaft rubbed slowly over Jack's prostate as it entered him again.

"Fuck Ianto, I...I can't..."

Ianto tightened his fingers around Jack's wrist and pressed his thumbs down again as he shifted, making sure the head of his cock was continuously pressing against Jack's prostate. Jack's body froze at the pressure, another sobbing moan erupting from his throat.

"You can and you will Jack. Remember, I come first."

Ianto leant forward and sucked on Jack's neck, moving his lips over his pulse point and allowing his tongue to flick out, tasting his skin. A heady rush of power and fire coursed through him as Jack gasped again. He could tell that Jack was hanging on the precipice, stuck with the need and desire to come, yet unable to. He also knew the cock ring had to be almost torturing the other man as it rubbed against his perineum with every shift of Jack's hips. He had to assume that Jack was okay, because he hadn't uttered his safe word.

His lips moved along the edge of Jack's ear as he growled out his next words.

"Then and only then, if you're good, I'll make you come so hard you'll forget everything."

Jack gasped for air, his throat bobbing as he obviously tried to focus on what Ianto was telling him. He began to pull forward and push back against Ianto's hard cock, harsh growls and sobs coming from deep in his throat every time Ianto's cock slid over his prostate. It was nearly enough to make him come, but he held back, despite the struggle it took to do so.

For the time being, Ianto kept his fingers tightly wrapped around Jack's wrists, hyperaware of every shift of his hips. He concentrated on his breathing, keeping it steady so that he wouldn't give anything away to Jack. As Jack's body pressed back again, Ianto pressed his thumbs down one more time, then released them completely and wrapped his arms around his torso. His fingers found Jack's nipples again, flicking over them every time the other man pulled forward. Jack's mouth fell open, his breathing heavy and erratic. Ianto fell forward resting his chin against Jack's shoulder for a moment before reaching up and grasping Jack's chin, turning his face towards his own. He captured Jack's lips, thrusting his tongue into his mouth, kissing him deeply.

Jack moaned against his lips, his hips speeding up as their tongues wrapped wetly around one another. Ianto allowed the speed, but pulled out of the kiss and rested his forehead against Jack's. He gasped for air and tried to find his voice, taking longer than he knew it should have, but the sensations were too overwhelming. Almost as if the stimulation alone was threatening his vocal cords.

"You're going to have to try harder than that Sir."

Jack groaned at his words, speeding up further, his hips now moving so rapidly that Ianto drew in a harsh breath of air. Ianto's body felt like fire and ice, the heat exploding throughout him as the cool air of Jack's room washed over his sweat covered skin. One more thrust backwards as Jack's body tightened around his cock and Ianto felt the heat that had been threatening to consume him take over. He wrapped his arms tightly around Jack's waist and pulled his hips back burying himself as deep as possible.

"God, Jack..."

He couldn't stop the harsh groan that erupted from his throat when that fire exploded out of his cock, thought and reason disappearing as he emptied himself deep inside Jack's arse. His shaft throbbed, pressing against Jack's prostate with each pulse that ran through it. Somewhere along the edge of his mind he heard Jack groaning, but he was too wrapped up in the feel of the other man's body to recognise it.

He collapsed against Jack's back, his hips thrusting sporadically as his cock began to soften. He heard Jack groan again and kissed the shoulder he was currently leaning against in response. He knew that Jack had been on the edge for what had to seem like forever to his own mind.

As Ianto began to regain the feeling in his body, he pulled out of Jack, grinning at the frustrated moan that came from him. Jack's body pressed backwards, obviously seeking Ianto's again, but Ianto had taken a step away. Ianto grinned again, his body utterly sedate and relaxed now that the fire had been dampened within him.

Jack however, was another story.

Ianto studied him for a moment, almost completely breathless at the state of arousal that was still coursing through Jack's body. His skin gleamed with sweat, giving it a sheen and sparkle that reflected the soft light that was surrounding them in the small room.

As quietly as possible, Ianto slipped around to Jack's side, trying not to give away his position. He lost control momentarily when his eyes locked on Jack's erection and a soft gasp escaped him. That was all it took for Jack to turn towards him, a whimper of need coming from his throat. His cock jutted out, so hard that it was nearly flush against his abdomen. He drew in another deep breath, and Jack's erection twitched at the sound, the head leaking copiously with precome, nearly purple as it throbbed in time with his rapid heartbeat.

Ianto closed his eyes for a moment, shaking his head with discontent. If he had any idea how much pain Jack had obviously been in, he would have handled it much sooner. He had intentionally avoided touching Jack's erection while he was inside him because he knew that he was already in a torturous state. It was almost as if Jack had purposely used Ianto as an excuse to persecute and inflict pain on himself. If it had been anyone else, they would have used their safe word ages ago.

"Ianto I need to come...please...oh God...please..."

Ianto winced at the wounded tone in his voice and leaned in to speak softly in his ear.

"I know _cariad_...I know..."

Ianto froze, realising a moment too late that he had just revealed a secret he'd been trying to keep from Jack. He held his breath, waiting to see if Jack would understand him. After a few seconds of silence, he realised he would never really be sure as Jack didn't give any indication either way.

The last thing he wanted to do right now was cause the other man more pain. However, on a baser level he was also aware that this torment was something Jack _needed_. If he hadn't then Jack _never_ would have never let it get this intense. Somewhere, entrenched in Ianto's mind, he was starting to get uneasy. However, it was neither the time nor place to address such an arcane issue. He thrust the thoughts currently cascading through his mind to the very back and ran his fingernails lightly up Jack's arm, wrapping his fingers tightly around the other man's wrist.

"Just let me look at you a little longer. Let me get pleasure in seeing you in this state...in knowing you belong to me and only me right now."

'_Well, in for a penny, in for a pound...'_ Ianto thought as he hesitated as for a split second before continuing.

"_Cariad_, just let everything go and let me take my pleasure in looking at you."

Jack whimpered, his teeth catching his lower lip and biting down so hard that Ianto was honestly worried that he would break the skin. He saw a crease in Jack's forehead and pressed his fingers to it, smoothing the skin lightly with his touch. Slowly and tenderly, he moved the tips of his fingers down to Jack's lip, tugging gently on it until he released it from between his teeth. Ianto couldn't resist breaking out of his character for a moment, allowing his concern to overwhelm him. He was sincerely starting to worry that maybe Jack didn't even know his own limits. It was quite possible considering the state he was already in.

"Are you okay with that?"

Jack seemed to debate over the question for longer then he thought possible before nodding a little tentatively. He drew in a few calming breaths, before speaking in a deep gravelly voice.

"I'm yours Ianto..."

Ianto slipped back into character somewhat hesitantly. He was still worried, but Jack seemed to be giving in to him. However, he also felt another emotion niggling at the edge of his mind, one he didn't want to focus on too clearly at the moment. It was as if, on a baser level, Jack _needed_ to submit to someone. In a strange way he was honoured that Jack would allow him to be the one to take him to this level.

Ianto glided his lips across Jack's slowly, drinking in the taste and feel of them against his own. Jack sighed into him, his mouth opening slightly, welcoming Ianto to deepen the kiss if he so chose. Ianto took the invitation, slipping his tongue into the other man's mouth and running it over his teeth. Jack struggled against his bonds again and Ianto raised his hand to the back of his neck, pressing their lips together tightly. His tongue mapped out the crevices of Jack's mouth before caressing and drawing out the other man's. Just as he began to feel faint from lack of air, he drew away.

There was one more thing he really wanted to do before he began to take Jack over the edge completely. Without saying another word, he slipped the blindfold over Jack's head, only to find the older man had his eyes tightly closed behind it. With a soft stroke down the side of Jack's face, he cupped his cheek within his palm and spoke in low voice.

"Open your eyes Jack."

His eyelids opened slowly, just barely focussing on Ianto's face. From the depth of his gaze, Ianto could tell that Jack had lost something within himself. He was already so far gone that his eyes had gone hazy with lust. They were full of so much arousal that it was almost sharp and dangerous, enough to stab straight through Ianto and drive him to his knees. He allowed the feeling to overwhelm him and followed through on the inclination, slipping between Jack and the ladder before kneeling down. He glanced up hesitantly to find Jack staring down at him with an almost reverent smile on his lips.

He smiled back before reaching out and running the tip of his finger along the underside of Jack's cock. His hips snapped forward and Ianto risked another glance up to find Jack with his head arched back, his mouth open but no sound escaping. He removed his hand and Jack's gaze shot back to him, his eyes actually tearing up in frustration.

"Watch me Jack."

Before he could respond, something which Ianto wasn't even sure Jack had the capability of at the moment, he leaned forward and slipped his lips over the glans of Jack's cock. He heard Jack groan above him as his tongue flicked out and caressed the small hole at the tip. The bittersweet precome coated his taste buds as he drew the hard flesh further into the warm recesses of his mouth. Jack's erection was so rigid that he barely had room to manoeuvre it. As it was he had to push as far back against the ladder as possible just to slide his lips over it.

Ianto glanced up at Jack from under his eyelashes to find his gaze locked on him, following every action avidly. He began to move his mouth up and down as much as possible with the room he had. He felt Jack shift backwards, giving him more room to work with. The movement caused his teeth to drag along the bottom of Jack's cock and Ianto jumped as he heard the other man groan in pleasure so loud it was almost a scream.

Ianto tightened the suction around Jack's cock, and began to move more rapidly, his tongue wrapping around the head every time he pulled back. Jack's hips were thrusting against his mouth, pressing his erection deeper and deeper with each plunge. Ianto took another opportunity to look up and at the same time he relaxed his throat.

He slipped his hand to Jack's entrance and pressed in with two fingers, curling them so that they pushed lightly against his prostate. Out of his peripheral vision, Ianto saw Jack's chin drop forward, his eyes completely glazed over with the pleasure that was quickly consuming him. Just as swiftly Ianto raised his hand and released the ring from Jack's cock, allowing it to fall to the floor. The moment it hit the ground, he closed his eyes and pulled Jack's erection deep into his mouth, feeling the head slip past his tongue and into his throat.

Jack screamed as his body went completely rigid. Ianto relaxed his throat even further and swallowed as quickly as possible, moving his head forward until he felt his lips come in contact with Jack's pubic hair. Some part of him realised he'd just taken Jack deeper down his throat then he ever thought possible, but he barely had time to recognise that fact before Jack was coming, screaming Ianto's name at the power of his release.

He only allowed the throbbing to pulse twice in his throat before pulling back and capturing the rest of his come on his tongue. It took him a moment to realise that Jack was still spasming in his mouth, and he revelled in the fact that he'd made him come so powerfully as he quickly swallowed the rest. Just as Jack's orgasm seemed to be winding down, Ianto released his hip and grasped his balls within his palm, massaging them. At the same time, he began to hum around Jack's swiftly softening cock.

Jack screamed again, his erection throbbing one final time as warm liquid coated the inside of Ianto's mouth, before he collapsed bonelessly against the ladder. Ianto swallowed the last of the bittersweet fluid before releasing Jack's cock with a quick swipe over the head with his tongue and pulled away, slipping out from between Jack and the ladder.

As Ianto stood up, he felt a wave of content go through him. That was until he caught sight of Jack's body and the way he suddenly seemed to be entirely unresponsive. Jack had stopped moving, his body utterly limp against the ladder as his hands hung flaccidly in repose within the cuffs. In fact, the only thing that seemed to be supporting him were those leather restraints.

Ianto reached forward and cupped Jack's chin in his palm, shaking his head back and forth gently. There wasn't even a flicker of response from him. His eyes remained steadfastly closed, his mouth slackened as his lips parted minutely.

"Jack?"

Ianto drew in a deep breath of air and released it quickly before trying again. He leant forward and brushed his lips lightly over Jack's, then pulled back and shook him again when it failed to get a reaction.

"Jack? Are you okay?"

This time when he didn't receive a response, Ianto reached forward and undid the leather straps as quickly as possible, just barely catching Jack before he fell bonelessly to the floor. It took a great deal of manoeuvring as he wrapped Jack within his embrace and collapsed on the bed, holding him close.

Time seemed to slow for Ianto as he watched Jack and waited, his concern growing deeper and deeper as the other man lay lax against him. The only thing that gave him comfort was the fact that Jack was breathing evenly, his heart beating steadily underneath Ianto's palm when he rested it briefly against his chest to check.

Just as he began to seriously debate calling Owen, Jack began to stir beside him. He heaved a sigh of relief and tilted Jack's face towards his own. Jack's eyelids fluttered open slowly, with absolutely no comprehension of his surroundings. After a few more minutes, Jack's eyes finally began to focus on Ianto's face, a look of shock crossing his features. He opened his mouth hesitantly and spoke with a voice so hoarse that Ianto very nearly had to struggle to hear him.

"Ianto, did you actually just make me come so fucking hard that I passed out?"

The situation was far too amusing for Ianto to stop the bubble of laughter that suddenly burst from his throat. The sound seemed to rouse Jack even further from the stupor he still seemed to be struggling with.

"Yes Jack, I suppose I did..." he said, struggling to get the words out between the choking laughter currently overwhelming him.

He heard Jack begin to laugh with him and pulled away suddenly, standing up and offering out his hand for the other man to take. Jack gazed at it, before slipping his fingers between Ianto's and intertwining them tightly together.

"What do you say we discuss it in the shower Jack?"

He saw Jack nod lightly as he pulled the other man upright. Just as Jack got to his feet, he reached out and pulled Ianto into a tight bone crushing hug. Ianto was surprised to hear Jack whisper softly in his ear as he started to pull away.

"Thank you."

TBC

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So I know it wasn't exactly worth THAT long of a wait, but please let me know what you think. It's not required, as per normal, but much appreciated if you choose to leave feedback! :)


	38. Chapter 38 Paging Dr Freud

_AN: I have to say a great big than__k you to Mama Rocks! She made this chapter read through so much better than it originally did!_

_Thank you to everyone who leaves me feedback! I really do appreciate immensely!_

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Chapter 38 - Paging Dr. Freud...

Though he would never admit it if asked, there were times that Jack himself was surprised at his own proclivity. He'd known from the moment that Ianto asked to tie him up that it would be a unique experience. It had been a very long time since Jack had allowed anyone that much control over his mind and body. However, over the past few months he'd come to realise that even the most minimalistic sexual contact with the young man was bound to be interesting. Hell, he'd all but come to expect it where Ianto was concerned.

What he _**hadn't**_ expected was the way he was now feeling.

For the first time in nearly a century, his mind was blessedly clear of everything that normally weighed him down. It was almost as if every responsibility and worry in his life had been thrust into the deepest recesses of his mind. That release was both dangerous and precarious, but at the moment he couldn't find it in himself to care.

He inhaled deeply, letting Ianto's unique scent caress his senses, wishing for all the world that he could've known how special the young man was the instant he met him. It was so very rare that he actually met someone in his life that he could trust. If he didn't know any better he would have thought he was still asleep and dreaming.

Nothing seemed real anymore.

He felt giddy and lightheaded, completely content to just stand here forever. There were no expectations, no responsibilities, no sorrow or loss...

"Jack? Are you all right?"

Ianto's voice whispered over to him, soft and intimate, pulling him out of the daze that was beginning to overwhelm him.

It wasn't until _**that**_ very moment that he realised exactly how much of what he was feeling was actually showing on the outside. Ianto's palm moved to his cheek, dragging his fingers down until they were caressing Jack's jaw, their eyes locked instantly. He smiled half-heartedly, intent on reassuring Ianto that everything was okay, but the quiet concern in his eyes just constricted Jack's throat, making it hard to breathe. At times like these, Jack could see something more in Ianto's eyes, something he couldn't possibly acknowledge. Even through the haze that surrounded him, he knew it would only lead to a place they couldn't go. No matter how much he was tempted, how much he _**ached**_ to follow through, he couldn't.

"Jack, I thought we were going to take a shower?" Ianto said softly with a strain tingeing his voice.

Ianto's voice broke through his reverie again. He pushed the idea out of his mind and turned away to lead Ianto towards his private bathroom, opening the door indolently. He was struggling, trying with all his might to hold onto the peace that coated his mind, but it was sliding away slowly and surely. He knew everything would all come back eventually anyway but he was loathe to hurry it along.

As soon as they walked through the door Ianto tugged at his hand, apparently trying to pull away. He turned back towards the young man with a lopsided grin and tightened his grip as he softly shook his head. Without breaking their gaze, Jack raised their joined fingers to his mouth and brushed his lips lightly over the back of Ianto's hand. Ianto's eyebrow rose up in response, his lips quirked up on one side and Jack felt a thrill of arousal shoot throughout him at the sight. It was a look that boldly and bluntly told whomever it was aimed at that the young man thought they were either being silly, needed to be reprimanded, or they'd gone slightly batty. Jack was amused to realise that, more often than not, this expression was aimed at himself.

He saw Ianto roll his eyes in response to Jack's evident reaction and then, for a split second, he could've sworn he also saw the young man wince just before he turned his head and began to look around the bathroom. After a moment of internal debate, he shrugged it off as his imagination. Jack's own body was aching, his wrists hurt beyond comprehension, but he was enjoying it as a pleasant reminder of the incredible bout of sex they'd just indulged in.

While Ianto continued to look around Jack tried to understand his curiosity. He knew Ianto had never been in here before, hell the young man probably hadn't even realised what was behind the door until he led him through it. He grinned when a look of puzzlement came to Ianto's face, chuckling as the young man took a step towards the sinks. Ianto ran his fingertips over the marble countertop near one of the faucets, and turned back towards Jack with a slightly dazed expression on his face.

"Jack, how long has this room been here?" he asked with a hint of amazement in his voice.

Jack drew his eyebrows together, trying to focus enough to answer. His brain was still a little too fuddled, so a quick response was out of the question.

"I built it just after Alex...after I inherited control over Torchwood. I was the only one left so I had to find a way to be here all the time."

Ianto's eyebrow rose again at Jack's obvious diversion, as he stepped back towards him with a crooked half smile covering his lips. Jack beamed back in response to Ianto's obvious approval, then turned and led him towards the glass blocks that made up the wall of his shower. Just as he turned to walk into the entrance he felt Ianto stumble behind him. Without hesitation he whipped back around and caught Ianto before he could fall completely to the floor. He closed his eyes for a minute admonishing himself while helping Ianto to stand up. With everything that had happened in the past few hours, he'd completely forgotten about the previous days atrocities.

'_Fucking hell Ja__ck, sometimes you can be such a God damned idiot!'_

Jack led him gently into the shower, his eyes flicking over Ianto's body, noticing that some of the bruises were darker than they had been the night before. As he pushed Ianto down on a bench inside the shower, his hand came up to wipe away a trail of sweat, following it down the young man's cheek until he reached his jaw and tilted his face. Ianto tried to avoid his stare, then obstinately looked towards Jack when he wouldn't release him.

"Why didn't you tell me you were in pain?" Jack said as he ran the tips of his fingers gently around a cut on Ianto's forehead.

"It's not like you can fix it sir..." Ianto whispered as he shook his head to pull out of Jack's grip.

Jack sighed and left Ianto on the seat as he went back into his bedroom. He returned just as quickly as he left, holding a couple of pills and a bottle of water. A look of disdain flickered across Ianto's features as he held them out to him. Ianto's lips curled, ignoring Jack for a few minutes before finally reaching out and snatching them from his hands. He took the pills grudgingly, shuddering as he swallowed them.

Jack ignored the expression and reached out to twist the taps, flicking a switch on the wall that made both of his showerheads come on at the same time. He shivered, gasping lightly as cold water hit him and quickly adjusted the shower to a warmer setting before turning back. Ianto was staring at the wall, seemingly unaware of the temperature of the water that was cascading down on him. He reached out and pulled Ianto to his feet, making sure he was completely under the flow of water before wrapping his arm around the young man. His free hand came up to Ianto's chin, tilting his face towards Jack's so he could see him better. Before Ianto could stop him, he leant forward and brushed their lips together in a chaste kiss.

Ianto's mouth parted minutely, his tongue lingering just behind his lips in enticement for Jack to deepen the kiss. He briefly debated on ignoring the invitation, then allowed his instinct to win out as he dipped his own tongue gently into Ianto's mouth, letting the sweetness of the his unique flavour overwhelm him. He felt Ianto try to take control of the kiss and quickly tilted his head to align their mouths better before applying a slight suction. Ianto moaned into his mouth, surrendering against his assault and Jack pulled away before he became too immersed himself, chuckling quietly when the young man emitted a growl in response.

It was just the distraction he'd been aiming for...

"What's wrong with admitting you need some help Ianto?" he whispered softly against Ianto's lips, pulling back further so he could look at him directly.

Jack heard Ianto take a hissing breath as he closed his eyes and shook his head back and forth minutely. Between his refusal to tell Jack he was in pain and his reaction when he handed Ianto the medicine he could tell there was a powerful reason behind it. So Jack kept all of his focus on the young man while he waited patiently for an answer to his question.

It actually took longer than he thought it would. By the time Ianto's eyes opened back up, his hair was completely soaked and hanging raggedly in wet waves over his forehead. Jack pushed it back and tilted his own head down a fraction, just enough to look Ianto in the eye.

"It's not that I don't, er..."

Ianto sighed quietly, his frame sagging against Jack's as his eyes flicked away for a brief second before coming back.

"It just reminds me too much of Lisa and the way I spent the past few months. Of everything I've lost..."

The instant that Ianto said her name, Jack's stomach plummeted, anxiety overruling every other emotion. He'd been so caught up in the hectic activities of the past couple of months, that he'd honestly began to think that Ianto had handled it on his own. However, after that stupid game that Gwen had started the previous day, he'd pretty much established that was more wishful thinking than anything else. He'd, once again, accepted that Ianto would have to face facts when it came to what happened to her. In a way, he'd almost expected him to bring her up the night before, but they'd both been so exhausted they essentially fell into bed and passed out cold.

Jack struggled silently for a moment, trying to find something to say...anything.

Unfortunately absolutely nothing was coming to mind. After a few minutes, his abdomen tying in knots the entire time, Ianto offered him a forced strained smile that didn't meet his eyes and pulled from his embrace, turning away. There was something in the way Ianto moved when he picked up the soap that told Jack he'd known how uncomfortable he was with the subject.

Jack felt an icy coat of fear engulf him, quickly followed by a wave of guilt. The last thing he wanted to do right now was hurt Ianto, but in the greater scheme of things it was almost inevitable.

'_Smooth Jack...real smooth. Why don't you just knock him on his ass next time?'_

Without saying a word, Jack reached over and took the soap from him, lathering his hands up in the process. He stepped forward and began to wash Ianto's body carefully, running the lather over every inch of his smooth skin that he could reach. He wrapped his arms around Ianto's chest and paid special attention to his nipples, taking immense pleasure in the way they pebbled at his touch. In a way he knew that was he was doing wasn't sexual, it was intended to be more of a comfort gesture. The least he could do was make sure that Ianto was aware he was here for him, even if he wasn't prepared to talk to him about it yet.

Eventually Ianto sighed and collapsed back against his body, taking the respite that Jack was offering him. For a split second, Jack actually debated on trying to find something to say again. He gave up after making a silent promise to himself that he would discuss it with the young man as soon as he found the right thing to say and focussed on distracting Ianto the best way he knew how.

Jack shifted forward slightly, trailing his soapy hands up and down Ianto's chest, relishing the feeling of the crisp wet hair that caressed his fingertips. He would never admit if asked, but he was fascinated at the way men's bodies had changed over the timeline. Between the ability to have children and the hairlessness of most of his own body, humans were a whole other species in the future. He was enamoured with the sensation it created when that hair rubbed up against his own bare chest, almost to the point that he could nearly come from that feeling alone. He'd met a few men over his long lifetime that had too much or not enough chest hair, but Ianto certainly wasn't one of them.

Ianto's body was perfect, absolutely gorgeous. Everything from the firm ass that was currently pressed against Jack's groin, to the light trail of hair that narrowed as it led down his perfectly toned chest to his cock. As much as he loved the way Ianto looked in those suits, sometimes just the sight of him without a shirt sent a thrill of lust throughout Jack that was so powerful it practically weakened him. He was extremely grateful that he hadn't been put in that situation around the rest of the team. He had a feeling that one of them would probably notice if he tore off his own shirts and grabbed Ianto to rub up against him in the middle of the Hub, kissing him senseless in the process...

Ianto gasped and Jack shook his head slightly, bringing himself back to the present. His hand had continued to tease at Ianto's chest while he'd been lost in thought, obviously moving from instinct and practice. One palm was flat against Ianto's chest, his fingers running through the wiry hair, and the other had latched onto one of the hard nipples, twisting and tweaking it between his thumb and forefinger. He switched hands, flicking the tip of the other nipple before wrapping his thumb and finger around it and Ianto's hips thrust back against him in response.

Jack flipped the hand that was resting flat and ran the back of his fingers down until he'd reached Ianto's abdomen. He ran them over Ianto's stomach lightly, pausing for a second to dip his thumb into his belly button. He froze when Ianto shuddered in his arms, fighting against the anxiety that was suddenly ripping through him.

'_Shit! Is it one of the bruises on his stomach? Did I just...'_

Ianto's voice broke through his thoughts, stopping the litany of worries that were hurling around in his mind.

"Fuck Jack...that tickles..."

Even through his laughter, Ianto's voice was so deep and coated with arousal that every word moved through Jack like a harsh caress. He shivered as his palms dropped to Ianto's waist, yanking him back at the same time as he thrust his own hips forward. He heard the young man growl in response and gasped aloud when he felt Ianto's hands on his ass, cupping and kneading the globes as their bodies began to move in tandem together. Jack's eyes rolled up into his head as he realised how closely they were pressed against one another, the water falling from above them was barely able to penetrate the space.

Possessiveness encompassed him in a way that he'd completely forgotten existed. A tiny fraction of his mind was telling him that he was quickly losing control over the situation, but he didn't care. All he could concentrate on was the slick flesh that was gliding smoothly along his own and how much he wanted to claim Ianto, to mark him. He dipped his head down and closed his lips over the top of Ianto's spine, sucking the flesh deep into his mouth. He didn't pull away until he was absolutely certain that a love bite was evident. Jack's mouth drifted along Ianto's shoulder, stopping every few millimetres to leave another mark. Each time he pulled away, his tongue came out to lathe across the area soothingly before moving on.

Ianto wrenched himself away and turned to push Jack forcefully against the wall, kissing him with a fever that nearly addled his brain. Dizziness overwhelmed him at the amount of passion he felt coming from Ianto's lips, while he nipped and sucked at Jack's mouth, practically devouring him. Ianto's hands grasped his arse again, yanking their hips flush together and Jack's mouth dropped away, gasping for air as their cocks slid wetly along one another.

"Ianto..." Jack moaned out, barely able to form the word around the harsh pants that were falling from his lips.

Without warning, Jack suddenly felt a mixture of cold air and warm water hit his skin as Ianto pulled completely away. He was so fucking turned on, his cock hard and painfully jutting out in front of him, that he was that barely able to comprehend what had happened. When he was finally able to look up he saw Ianto standing several paces away from him with a cocky grin on his face. He took a step forward, fully intending to finish what they'd started, only to see Ianto shake his head as his chest rumbled with barely contained laughter.

"I said shower Jack, not sex. Remember what you told me last time we were in this very same situation at my loft?"

Jack narrowed his eyes, taking another step as he reached out and ran his thumb over Ianto's lower lip. The young man raised his eyebrow in response, but made no other acknowledgment. Jack grinned arrogantly and up the stakes, reaching forward with his other hand and wrapping it around Ianto's erection.

"I don't think so Ianto. It's my turn to claim you." Jack said quietly as he began to pump his hand up and down in time with each throb he felt against his palm.

Ianto gasped at the feeling and Jack used the momentary distraction to reverse their positions, pressing Ianto gently against the wall. As soon as Ianto was where he wanted him, he stepped forward and loosened his grip, just enough to press his cock alongside Ianto's and wrap his fist tightly around both. He could see Ianto's erection responding to the sensation, though not nearly as fast as he would have preferred.

"I think I'd rather get a little slicker first."

Jack looked up from his hand to find Ianto leaning his head sideways against the tiled wall with his eyes closed. He took advantage of the position, grazing his lips and teeth along Ianto's collarbone before moving up to blow a light gust of air directly into his ear. Ianto's eyes flew open at the feeling, his own hands coming up to grip tightly at Jack's shoulders. He pushed against his shoulders as he spoke with a low voice.

"We need to shower Jack..."

* * *

Ianto fought against the urge to smile as a look of confusion came over Jack's handsome features. He was fairly certain that Jack hadn't expected him to stop him, much less push him away. It took every ounce of strength he possessed to do what he'd done, but it was almost worth it to be able to put that look on the other man's face. Jack's blue eyes were full of surprise, something Ianto had never seen before, at least not in this context.

The main problem was that Ianto _**really**_ did want to shower. He still felt sticky and sweaty from their earlier dalliance, despite the fact that the water had been falling on them for quite some time and Jack had washed some small areas of his body. It wasn't that he was against another round, he just wanted to be a little cleaner for his own reasons. He had the presence of mind to notice that aches and pains that had been running throughout him were gradually fading, so the pills Jack had made him swallow earlier were beginning to take effect. He thrust the next thoughts about Lisa out of his head as quickly as they started to appear.

Ianto watched Jack, nearly laughing out loud at the internal debate he saw warring behind the other man's blue eyes. After a few minutes, Jack finally took a step back and crossed his arms still clutching the soap in one hand, allowing Ianto to push away from the wall. He was startled to realise that the movement didn't change the amount of water pouring over his body. He took another step forward and glanced up at the showerhead. When he'd first entered he'd been in too much pain to notice how unusual the small room was. Now that he was thinking with a slightly clearer presence of mind, he noticed the way the water fell from the two large square showerheads was more like rain then the normal flood.

He glanced back over to Jack to find the other man was growing impatient with his observation, even if he wouldn't admit to it. Without saying anything, he took the soap away from Jack's clenched fist and began to lather up his own hands. He pushed the unusual aspects about the shower to the back of his mind and quickly soaped up his body, rinsing it off as soon as he was sure he'd reached all the places that had been bothering him. Jack watched him avidly throughout the process, his arms folded across his chest, looking very much like a petulant child in a snit.

He chuckled quietly under his breath as he turned his focus back towards Jack, reaching out and pulling him over to him. Jack's arms remained crossed, even when Ianto began to wash his body. He took careful consideration to run his fingers over every nook and cranny he could find. As soon as he was certain that Jack's body was clean he pressed Jack's arms down and dropped his head to one of his nipples, sucking the nubbin deep into his mouth.

Jack gasped above him, his hands quickly moving up to twine in Ianto's hair when he bit down and flicked his tongue over the tip. Ianto winced as Jack's fingers grew tighter, practically yanking his hair out by the roots and he bit down harder then he planned, his teeth grinding together over the soft flesh. The struggle lasted a mere second longer before he finally realised that Jack was actually trying to pull him away. He released the nipple slowly and looked up at Jack from beneath his eyelashes, surprised to see the other man glaring down at him with his eyes narrowed.

Ianto straightened up quickly, a shiver of fear running through him. He'd seen Jack angry, even furious several times, but this expression didn't match any of those occasions, so he wasn't quite sure what it meant. Jack's lips pursed and Ianto suddenly grew uncomfortably aware of his precarious position. Not only was he standing there soaking wet with a half hard cock, but he'd just broken Jack down to the most basic of places not more than a half an hour ago. He dropped his gaze as he started to step away. There was an undeniable urge to put a little distance between them, maybe even bolt out of the room if he could manage it. He was shocked to feel Jack suddenly wrap his arms around him, stopping his escape.

"Ianto, Ianto, Ianto...what am I going to do with you?" Jack said in a whisper as he leant forward to brush his lips softly across Ianto's forehead.

When the question finally managed to penetrate his mind, he raised his eyes to look at Jack with bafflement. Jack winked at him as their gazes met and Ianto felt something shift inside of him at that simple action, almost as if his whole way of thinking had been altered in a manner he didn't quite grasp yet. It was only now, _**after**_ the fact, that he realised Jack had been teasing him from the moment he'd first crossed his arms.

Ianto closed his eyes, completely aware of the way his cheeks were beginning to warm with embarrassment. He had no bloody idea why he was blushing, especially since Jack's teasing hadn't exactly been all that amusing. He heard Jack chuckling and opened his eyes slowly, trying to figure out what the other man was laughing at. Jack released one of his arms from around Ianto and ran his fingertips down his cheek, following his jaw line as it merged into the smooth line of his neck. There was an electric sensation everywhere he touched, a slow steady current that led straight from the tips of Jack's fingers, building until it struck like lighting directly into Ianto's cock. Ianto shuddered while all of the blood in his body rushed south, gasping when he felt Jack's rigid erection slide wetly along his own.

"Christ Ianto, you are so fucking sexy when you blush. Do you have any idea what that does to me?" Jack said suddenly, his voice hoarse and coated with arousal.

Ianto shook his head lightly, stopping abruptly when Jack leant forward and captured his earlobe between his teeth. After suckling on it for a few seconds, his teeth working the pliant flesh, he released it and shifted enough to allow his breath to drift into Ianto's ear as he whispered softly.

"I'm sorry Ianto, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable. I just can't let you take control again yet. Not before I get my own chance."

Ianto's breathing sped up at his words, his body shivering with anticipation. He was startled to realise how much he wanted the same thing. His whole frame ached with the desire ripping throughout him, his cock throbbing hard and weeping between their bodies. He _**needed**_ it in a way that completely overwhelmed him.

Jack smiled cockily at his response just before capturing his lips in a consuming kiss, mapping out the contours of his mouth with his tongue. Ianto felt his legs weaken against the sudden onslaught, entirely grateful for the support when Jack pressed him back against the corner wall, tilting his head at the same time to allow the other man more access.

Ianto felt Jack's body shudder as he chuckled again and pulled out of the kiss, trying to figure out exactly what was so amusing. He whimpered, wholly unprepared for the sudden sensation of Jack's hand wrapping around both their cocks, pumping them steadily as he held them tightly together. He had no idea when or how Jack had managed to get a hand between their bodies, but he certainly wasn't going to complain. Soft fingertips traced over his closed eyelids and Ianto opened them slowly, wondering exactly when he'd closed them in the first place. As their gaze met, Ianto felt that same shift that had happened earlier, this time followed by a quick snap that brought strength back into his legs. All of the air in his lungs gushed out in one quick exhaled breath as the sudden realisation that had been eluding him until now suddenly cascaded throughout his body.

"Jack, are you still...did you..." the words stuck deep in his throat, making it hard to catch any more air.

He could tell the moment that Jack realised what he was trying to ask. Jack released their cocks abruptly, raising his palms to cup his chin within their grip, then leant forward to brush his lips lightly over Ianto's. Before he could recover his ability to speak, Jack leant his forehead against Ianto's and spoke with a hoarse emotion ladled voice.

"Please Ianto, not now...Please..."

It took every bit of control in Ianto's body to do as Jack asked him, but he nodded softly, still too stunned to speak. Jack's hands released his jaw and Ianto found his body becoming even more pliant than before as warm fingers began to brush over his skin. His own hands dropped to Jack's arse, pulling their bodies flush against one another, dipping his finger into the crevice to run over the small sensitive hole. He felt Jack shudder softly in his arms at the sensation, revelling at the amount of power he now knew he had.

Jack was still immersed deeply in subspace.

So deep, in fact, that he was having a hard time disassociating enough to regain control. The insistent need to take care of him and make sure he wasn't in pain, the way he had started to wash Ianto, hell even the way Jack's hands had been gliding over his body, were all the signs he'd needed. It had just taken him longer than normal to put it all together.

He hadn't crossed his arms to tease Ianto, he'd done it because he'd pretty much told Jack to behave. It _**hadn't **_mattered that it wasn't those exact words. All that mattered was that he was having a hard time leaving that sanctuary in his mind. Ianto's submission in itself might just be enough to regain that power. Though he could tell that even Jack wasn't sure if it would, or even if he wanted to be pulled out of it. Ianto had _**never**_ been able to send anyone that deep before.

Not even Lisa...

For the first time in nearly two months, her name didn't hurt him the way it normally did. Ianto grinned, dipping his finger into Jack's entrance, absurdly proud at knowing the moan that escaped Jack's lips was utterly uncontrolled. He was only mildly surprised when Jack tried to both thrust back onto the invading digit and forward against his own hardness, creating a delicious sliding sensation to caress his own body at the same time.

Jack's hand suddenly gripped his arm, pulling him away from the sensations he was invoking on the other man's body. As Jack captured both his wrists and raised them above his head, containing them within one of his own hands, he heard a soft growl erupt from the other man's throat.

"That's unequivocally counterproductive Ianto...and you know it is."

Ianto grinned irascibly in response, struggling mildly within the grasp of Jack's hand. He didn't want to use too much force because he knew that Jack would only give in and release him. He felt his smile disappear as a harsh gasp escaped his lips when Jack's free hand wrapped tightly around Ianto's thigh, his nails digging almost painfully into the skin. A sardonic smile covered Jack's lips just before he lifted that leg, propping it on the bench and leaving him with the feeling that the other man knew exactly what was running through his mind.

Jack released his leg, still keeping a somewhat tight grip on his wrists and began to run his fingers over every part of Ianto's body that he could reach. He felt Jack's nails flick over his hard nipples and he nearly screamed in response, just barely able to rein it in by biting on his lip. He realised a split second later when the action was repeated, that this had been Jack's intent in the first place. This time he let a harsh moan escape him and thrust his hips forward at the same time.

After a moment, Ianto closed his eyes and allowed his body to ride the sensations that Jack was bringing out in him. Even with only one hand, he still seemed to be everywhere at once. He could almost swear that Jack's touch drifted over his neck at the exact same time that he felt fingers gliding along his abdomen. Or that the knuckles gliding down one of his captured arms came at the same time as the fingers that caressed his arse, clutching and kneading the cheeks roughly. Without even realising what he was doing, he shifted the leg that wasn't propped up further away, opening his body up to Jack's wandering hands.

He certainly became aware of it when Jack took the invitation, his hand running down his chest, bypassing the throbbing hardness to cup Ianto's balls within his palm. He rolled them carefully and Ianto jumped as a warm finger pressed against his perineum, his eyes opening suddenly as pleasure ran straight from that spot into his cock. The moment his eyes were fully opened, they locked with Jack's and he found himself unable to look away. It was odd, until that very moment he had never understood Jack's fascination with the gesture. He was normally happy just to feel the pleasure, not at all aware of the sensation that keeping someone's gaze could imbue upon him.

He was well aware of it now. Electric pleasure ripped throughout him, the connection was so intimate and revealing that he had to remind himself to take a breath of air. Every one of his senses went on alert making the world around him come into sharp focus. The feel of the water falling around them, still warm and comforting, was nearly enough to drive him to his knees. The smell of Jack's pheromones when he inhaled coated his taste buds, making him swallow instinctively when his mouth began to water at the flavour. The harsh pants coming from Jack hit his ears and made him suddenly start gasping and keening at the exact same pace.

Jack's tongue came out to wet his lips and Ianto found his body straining to get closer. He wanted those lips on his own. He _**needed**_ to taste Jack's flavour instead of getting it by proxy of his pheromones. Jack released his wrists suddenly and Ianto yanked his body forward, capturing those luscious lips with his own, thrusting his tongue into the other man's mouth almost brutally.

A slick finger teased against his opening, running around the ring of muscle before sliding easily into his body, thrusting in and out leisurely. He had no idea where Jack had gotten lube, much less one that seemed to work in water, but he wasn't going to question it too much. He was entirely too far gone to focus on anything but the sensations cascading through him.

Jack broke away, moving just far enough to catch his gaze again and Ianto gasped, only realising a second later that he was stealing the air that was being released from the other man's mouth. It was too much and yet, not nearly enough. Another slick finger joined the first and Ianto found that he was babbling almost incoherently, the words escaping his mouth in a rush at the pleasurable sensation.

"BloodyhellohGod...ohfuckJesusChrist...Jackplease!"

He heard Jack chuckle again, the warm rush of air caressing his own lips as they escaped the other man's mouth and had to fight back the orgasm that was rushing towards him. He knew without a doubt that if he could only hold on, if he could keep his body in check long enough, he would be able to come with Jack thrusting inside of him, his eyes and focus completely on Ianto the whole time. He _**needed**_ that as much as he required the air to breath.

It was practically a biological imperative at this point.

Jack's mouth panted against his, the air coming faster and more intensely concentrated. He felt another finger breach his entrance with the other two and screamed as his body clenched down at the invasion. His vision clouded, his gaze still locked on Jack's lust filled steely blue eyes, wavering just enough to send them out of focus. He was on the precipice and had no idea if he was going to be able to stop. The sound of Jack's voice, harsh and needy pulled him back just in time.

"Ianto...not yet. Wait until I'm inside you. I want to feel the ripples of pleasure as they overwhelm you and the way they make your body clench down tightly around my cock."

Ianto blinked as quickly as possible, just long enough to bring Jack back into focus clearly. Jack kept his gaze as his teeth nipped at Ianto's lower lip before sucking it into the warm depths of his mouth. He released it with a soft pop and whispered, his own lips tickling against the now swollen skin.

"You can do it... I know you can. You can because you want the same thing. You want to come with my cock thrusting into you, letting gravity draw you down and pressing me deeper into your body than you've ever felt. You want that too Ianto...don't you?"

Ianto barely realised he was nodding in assent, but he could hear his own voice echoing around them off the tiled and glass walls as he chanted over and over.

"Yes Jack...God yes...yes..."

Jack withdrew his fingers abruptly, pushing Ianto further up the wall until he was on his tip toes. When he began to slip along the slick surface, Jack's cock pressed against his entrance, sliding into his body smoothly with one sure thrust. Ianto broke their gaze to throw his head back releasing a harsh guttural groan of pleasure that came from deep in his chest.

"Do you trust me Ianto?"

Jack had scarcely finished asking the question before Ianto nodded. His eyes snapped back when he felt Jack wrap his warm fingers around the leg that was supporting him, yanking it up and around his waist, completely throwing Ianto's balance off. He shifted the support to his other leg, gasping when it caused Jack's cock to push further into his body.

Jack groaned this time, loud and uncontrollably, thrusting forward as if he was trying to go even deeper. Ianto was awash with pleasure, overwhelmed entirely when it appeared to work, his teeth biting down on his own lip this time. His leg tightened around Jack's waist as he arched his back, the action drawing Jack's cock further in until he'd completely bottomed out.

Ianto struggled against the overpowering pleasure rippling throughout his body. He could tell that Jack was waiting for him to make the first move, but he was too filled with sensation to be able to. His own hands were gripping tightly to Jack's shoulders, using his upper body strength to make sure that the other man wasn't taking all of his weight in one spot.

It took a minute for Ianto to realise that Jack still hadn't began thrusting in and out of him. Jack's fingers just stayed clenched on his arse, holding him steadily impaled on his cock as it pressed heavily against Ianto's prostate. He had no idea if it was for his benefit or Jack's but he was grateful for it nonetheless. He was already at the precipice, staring at the edge as it beckoned invitingly to him over and over. He knew that it would take very little to send his body spiralling out of control.

He opened his eyes, again unsure of when he'd closed them. The moment that Jack was able to capture his gaze he slid out of Ianto's body slowly, then allowed gravity to control the sudden thrust back in. Every nerve in Ianto's body sizzled, turning him into a mass of sensation as Jack repeated the movement several times, each withdrawal as slow and steady as the last, only to be impaled again with gravity fast accuracy. Ianto kept watching Jack, taking in every nuance of the expressions crossing his features, aware of how near the older man was as well.

Jack leant forward and captured his lips between his teeth again, his eyes locked with Ianto's the entire time. He was barely conscious of the fact that he was whimpering, but couldn't seem to find it in himself to care. Jack released his lower lip as suddenly as he'd taken it, and Ianto's senses went into overdrive again.

"Now, Ianto. Come right now."

The sound of Jack's voice echoed to his eardrums, sending a bolt of white hot lighting straight to his cock and setting him on fire. He was coming hard and unyielding, flames of pleasure licking at every inch of skin on his body, his fiery essence coating their abdomens. Ianto's fingers gripped tightly at Jack's shoulders, his nails digging harshly into the skin.

"Oh fuck! God Jack! I love..."

Their gaze finally broke as Jack's lips abruptly captured his, stopping the words he was struggling to get out. He was faintly aware that Jack was coming as well, but he was too focussed on the sensation riding throughout his body. He felt Jack shudder, their lips locked tightly together as they began to crumple to the floor. Ianto had just enough presence of mind to drop his legs down, cushioning the fall for both of them, before collapsing heavily on top of Jack.

When he finally began to come back to himself, he found Jack lying underneath him with his eyes closed, biting on his own lower lip. The shower was still on, warm water falling gently on their bodies, but the expression on Jack's face was enough to override his curiosity of how that was possible.

Ianto waited, watching as the water cascaded along Jack's dark hair, throwing it into sharp relief against the bright shower tile. Jack opened his eyes slowly and Ianto could tell he was appraising his own expression. He let out a squeal of surprise when Jack pushed him off his body and sat up, leaning heavily against the wall. Ianto sat up and leaned forward, running his hand down Jack's cheek in a caress. He saw Jack shudder again and pulled away quickly.

"What's wrong?"

He saw a ghost of a smile grace Jack's lips at the question, but didn't get an answer. Instead Jack stood up and shook himself lightly. He offered a hand to Ianto and pulled him upright, handing him the soap at the same time. When Ianto just stood staring at him in confusion, Jack shrugged and took it back from him, quickly washing his own body. He reached out and flicked the shower back to only one of the showerheads, brushed his mouth against Ianto's in a quick perfunctory kiss, before turning around and walking out of the shower.

As soon as Ianto heard the door to the bathroom shut, it suddenly struck him. His own words as he was coming drifted back through his mind and he collapsed heavily back onto the shower floor.

"Fucking Bullocks! What the bloody hell have I done?"

TBC

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_AN: So if I once again begged folks not to kill me, will you guys be just as lenient as last time? :) Hopefully you enjoyed reading this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it. __Feedback and comments are highly appreciated, but I do understand if you choose not to leave any. :) I'll keep writing either way..._


	39. Chapter 39 Nothing comes for free, on

_AN:__ Okay, so there is only one more Chapter of Anticipation. But don't worry, I've got a little side story planned in the same universe as well as the sequel. I want to thank Mama Rocks for her patience with me and this chapter! I was a little worried about a few things but she helped make them sound a LOT better. _

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Chapter 39 - Nothing comes for free, on days like these...

Twenty minutes after Jack left the shower, Ianto walked back into the bedroom. He wasn't at all shocked when he found the small area completely empty. What did surprise him was how dark it appeared to be. He'd turned off the bathroom light and shut the door without even realising the implications of his actions. Even the window that looked out onto Gwen's workstation was blacked out. The only light that penetrated the room came from Jack's office, casting a small illuminated circle on the opposite side of the bed.

It gave the space an eerie feeling that he didn't much care for.

Ianto froze just outside the bathroom door as a shiver ran down his spine. The last time he'd been in a small poorly lit area, he and Tosh were being held hostage by a bunch of insane psychopaths. Jack's room might be a safer haven, but after what had just happened, he felt almost as trapped as he had then.

"Bloody hell, would you fucking stop freaking out?"

Ianto jumped as the sound of his own voice bounced off the walls and echoed back to him. If Jack was in his office he didn't give Ianto any indication he'd heard him talking to himself. Ianto honestly wasn't expecting him to appear, but he still felt a thread of disappointment run through him. Part of him had really been hoping that maybe Jack had just been giving him a little time to figure out what he'd done. That small sliver of hope was gone the moment he made his way over to the bed. His clothes were folded neatly on the end, a piece of paper resting on top of them.

He picked up the note hesitantly, unsure if he actually wanted to read it. The very fact that Jack had even gone through the trouble astonished him. He'd known from the moment that Jack left him so unceremoniously in the shower that whatever the hell was going on between them was over. Jack had made it clear that night in his room, that even though emotions were involved he wasn't interested in falling in love with Ianto.

He was incredibly tempted to crumple the note up and get the hell out of the Hub, but curiosity got the better of him. Instead he sat down on the edge of the bed and held the piece of paper under the light.

_Ianto,_

_The rift alarm went off right after I left the shower to get dressed. Please, do me a favour and take the next couple of days off. _

_I know what you're thinking. I'm not hinting at anything. I just thought you could use some time off to heal...and maybe get some perspective. _

_The pain meds that Owen prescribed for you are on the bedside table. Please make sure you take them. I want you feeling better by the time I see you on Friday. _

_We'll talk when you get back._

_ Jack_

Ianto snorted coarsely, his eyebrows furrowing with confusion. Just when he was starting to think that he'd know how Jack would react to something, he went and did something that showed him how little he knew the other man.

_'Perspective? Is that what we're calling it Jack?'_

He stood up as he dropped the note back onto the bed and reached for his clothes. Despite the pain medication, it was harder than it should have been. He was doing a fine job of getting dressed until he reached his jumper and couldn't get the damn thing over his head. His mind was such a whirlwind of thoughts that it actually took him a few seconds to realise he was trying to tug his head through the armhole. He ripped it off with frustration, then couldn't stop staring at the garment, like it had offended him somehow.

After a while, he wasn't sure how long, it occurred to him that he could check to see if Jack had just been giving him an excuse so he could leave. It wasn't an appealing thought, but he knew of a way he could check. He finished getting dressed, extremely grateful when he didn't have any further issues. It took him a few minutes more to find his mobile next to the bed, belatedly realising that he'd taken it from Jack when he was half asleep. He'd just barely begun to climb the ladder when he dropped back to the floor. Without even realising he was going to do it, he folded up Jack's note and shoved it in his back pocket. Regardless of the fact that he didn't like it, he also grabbed the bottle of pills off the bedside table and shoved it in his front pocket.

He climbed up the ladder, this time without looking back. He was slightly frustrated that he hadn't taken a little more time to straighten it up, but the thought of lingering in that room by himself any longer bothered him more. As soon as he climbed out, he shut and latched the cover, a sigh of relief escaping him before he could stop it. It took him a minute to realise that he was actually feeling a bit guilty, almost as if he was leaving a crime scene without reporting it.

'_It's not like Torchwood doesn't do it every damn day.' _

Ianto chuckled at the thought as he made his way over to Tosh's workstation. Before he could second guess his intentions he pulled up the rift alert program. He had no idea how long he'd sat on the bed whilst he was getting dressed but he spotted the rift spike Jack had mentioned and minimized it again.

_'At least that wasn't just an excuse to get away from me...'_

He turned away from the computer, shaking his head as he walked towards the exit.

* * *

Jack sighed in frustration as he glared at the altax'lu in front of him. The small alien was about the size of a Great Dane, covered in dark purple scales, mauve furry stripes, and two _**very**_ poisonous curly green horns on the back of its head that could kill someone with just a scratch. Considering how agile and deadly the creature was, he couldn't take the chance of letting one of his team help him, which was the primary reason he was trying to catch the damn thing by himself.

As soon as Jack had left the Hub he'd paged both Gwen and Owen, telling them to meet him at the location of the rift alert. If he had known that the altax'lu was the cause of it, he would have told them to go directly to the Plass and just wait for him. Instead, when they'd arrived, for some odd reason together, he'd told them not to bother and to get back in one of the cars. Now they were both stuck in the SUV, doing God only knows what, while he ran around and around through a fucking park chasing it. All without being able to tell Owen, who was grumbling incessantly, why he didn't want them helping.

However, at this point he was nearly ready to call them out. He'd been trying for the better part of an hour to catch the damn thing and it kept evading him. Every single attempt he'd made to detain the creature had failed, it was almost on the brink of becoming ridiculous. He really didn't want to have to shoot it. Not only was it incredibly stupid, essentially having the brains of a goldfish, but also because it might be somebody's pet. If it _**was**_ domesticated, they might be able to find a use for it.

Jack took a slight step forward, trying once more to throw a rope over its neck. For what had to be the fiftieth time, it slipped a few paces to the right of where'd he thrown the rope. When it turned towards him, he could almost swear the damn thing was laughing at him. He growled before he could stop himself and the alien jumped at the sound, the chuffing noise coming from its mouth cutting off abruptly. Without giving it a chance to move again, he jumped on top of it, trying to avoid its horns and wrangled the rope around its thick neck. He couldn't stop the yell of triumph that burst from him when the rope finally tightened.

"Ah ha!"

Unfortunately, the sound of his voice startled the altax'lu, making it whip its head towards his hand. He barely felt one of the horns pierce his skin before darkness overtook him.

He had no idea how long it was, but when he gasped back to life his face was completely wet. It took him a few seconds to realise that the altax'lu was licking his cheek with a long silver tongue. He pushed it away with a growl, wiped his face off with his shirt, and hit his comm.

"Okay, you can come out now. Grab a couple of those foam squares from the boot first."

He heard the doors slam and sighed with irritation when the creature sat down docilely beside his leg. He tightened his hand on the rope and turned towards it with a scowl.

"You couldn't have done that a half hour ago?" he said as the creature looked at him vacantly, its tongue lolling out of the side of it mouth.

One good thing about focussing so much on the altax'lu for the past hour was that he'd been distracted enough that he didn't have to think about what had happened. Now that he didn't have to concentrate so hard, the whole debacle came back with a vengeance. Just as he was remembering the look on Ianto's face when he'd left him in the shower he heard Gwen giggling at something Owen was saying.

The sound of that laughter irritated him. Ever since they'd shown up he'd been fighting against a serious urge to knock them both upside the head. He had no fucking idea what was up with them, but if they didn't get rid of their flaky attitudes he was going to have to yell at them and he just wasn't in the mood. When Gwen finally came around a tree and saw the look on his face, her laughter abated just as quickly as the creatures had previously. She started to walk towards the altax'lu with her hand out and Jack suddenly lost whatever restraint he had on his temper.

"Not yet Gwen! We need to cover its God damn horns first!" he growled as he turned to face the creature.

Holding its muzzle in his palms he kept it distracted while Owen slipped behind it and thrust a foam square over each horn. As soon as they were safely covered Jack tossed the end of the rope at Owen and stalked out of the trees towards the SUV. He didn't bother to look back at them, even though he knew they were exchanging a confused glance. The moment he'd yelled at Gwen she'd gotten what he'd come to think of as her pouting worshipful look. It was one of the more annoying expressions he'd grown used to and it irritated him to no end when she used it. It probably didn't help that he'd see her pouting in that manner anytime he yelled at her.

As soon as he slid into the driver's seat he started the SUV and began tapping on the steering wheel impatiently. He heard Gwen and Owen return and kept his eyes resolutely facing forward. His thoughts were once again back on Ianto. As they began to wrestle the creature, trying to get it into the back of the SUV, he closed his eyes and blocked the noise out.

Ianto's confession that morning was now making him face a very hard decision, one he really didn't want to consider the ramifications of. The way it stood he had two options. He could either stay with Ianto and allow himself to follow that path, or he could take a step back and ignore the whole fucking mess. If he stayed he had a hell of a lot more to lose, especially when the Doctor came back. If he left at least he wouldn't have to worry about what was best for Ianto. He heard the back door slam and rolled down the window.

"I'll meet you back at the Hub."

Without waiting for a response that he didn't want, he drove away.

Once Jack had made it back to the Hub and got the altax'lu into the vault, he made his way up to his office and threw himself into his chair dejectedly. He'd only been sitting there for a few seconds before the rift alarm went off again.

He stood up and went to see what was going on now.

* * *

When Ianto walked into his loft, his mind was still a mass of confusion. He shut the door lightly behind him and looked around the living room. For the first time since he moved in, he noticed how empty the place looked. There were no pictures or knickknacks around, nothing that gave it a degree of personality. If it hadn't been for the furniture or the bookcase full of books, the place would have looked as if no one lived there.

Even though it hadn't bothered him before, it drove him absolutely batty now. With a stern resolute expression he opened the closet next to his front door and pulled out the boxes that were stacked inside. He picked up the top one and brought it back to his spare bedroom, throwing open the door with more force than was necessary.

He left the box just inside the door and went to change his clothes and make coffee. Once he had a full cup he took a dose of his pain medication, then walked back into the spare room sitting down on the floor. The room itself was full of boxes, each labelled with his own precise writing, but he grabbed the one next to the door first and dumped it out in front of him.

A jumble of items belonging to Lisa tumbled out and landed in a mess before him. He drew in a deep breath of air and began to sort through the mess almost haphazardly. There were three open empty boxes next to him that he'd set up a while ago, right after Lisa had died, that he used to sort out the lot: one box for him, one for charity, and one for her family.

There was a vague sense of déjà vu running through him as he picked up a picture frame and turned it over in his palms. The silver frame was the same one he'd held when he last tried to sort through these items and had given up as soon as he'd seen it. Instead of the sharp pains that struck him the last time, he smiled at the memory that ran through his mind when he saw Lisa with her arm thrown around his waist. Both of them were laughing, completely unaware that their friend was taking a picture. He put it carefully into one of the empty boxes and began to sort through the rest.

With each item he pulled out...another picture of both of them at a celebration, a small stuffed animal that he won for her at a funfair, even a mug that he'd stolen from a pub they'd gone to...one more memory would come back. Ianto found himself smiling and laughing occasionally, completely unaware of the tears that were falling silently down his cheeks. He was vaguely aware that time was passing, but he was so immersed in what he was doing that he didn't really pay attention, except to refill his coffee cup whenever it was empty.

Once Ianto had gone through about half the boxes he heard a soft knocking on his front door. A thrill of unease ran through him as he got to his feet, stretching when his body began to ache from sitting on the floor for so long. He glanced out the window and tilted his head minutely in confusion when he saw the sky was beginning to darken. After a moment longer, he shook his head and began to walk towards the front door.

He could have laughed when he opened the door and realised he wasn't even remotely surprised to see Jack standing in front of him.

* * *

Jack was completely and totally exhausted.

From the moment he made it back with the altax'lu he spent most of his day running from one alert to another, trying to figure out what the hell was going on and why the rift was so fucking active. At one point he'd nearly sent both Gwen and Tosh home the same way he had with Ianto when he realised they were still in pain. The pair of them had looked at him like he'd lost his mind when he had suggested it as the fifth rift alert went off and he dropped the suggestion immediately. They had a valid point. There was absolutely no way just he and Owen could handle the day alone.

After the eighth alert, he'd completely lost his patience with both Gwen and Owen. He came in dragging a weevil to find them down in the medical bay flirting and joking around. Anger coursed throughout his entire body as he thrust the weevil towards them.

"This is your job, not a fucking bar! Here, for once why don't you do something useful!"

Gwen's eyes narrowed as she pulled her back straight and walked towards him. She stopped about five steps in front of him and put her hands on her hips as she started to yell back at him.

"That is completely out of line Jack! We've been running around just as much as you have! Why don't you just call Ianto and tell him we need him today?"

Jack let the rage take over his mind as he turned towards her and took a step forward. She backed up against the wall, a look of fear coming over her face. Her expression caused him to pause for a minute, his mind whirling with frustration and rage as he realised she actually thought he would hurt her. When he spoke again his voice was calm, even though it was coated with anger.

"No Gwen. You have _**not **_handled as many alerts as I have today. I am the boss. I have _**every right**_ to yell at you when I know that you are not doing your jobs. I've taken care of most of them while you two were pussyfooting and screwing around waiting for me to come back. If you were actually doing your God damn job we wouldn't need Ianto to come back. Now," he paused and looked between the both of them before continuing with a warning in his voice, "I have no idea what is going on between the two of you and I really don't fucking care as long as it doesn't interfere with your performance. However, if you do not straighten up and actually start working, I _**will**_ fire both of your asses. Do you understand?"

By the time he was finished speaking, Gwen and Owen were staring at him with their eyes open wide. Both of them nodded in acquiescence before Owen came over and took the weevil from him and Gwen slid around all of them to go to her workstation.

Things went a little more smoothly after that.

Nevertheless, on the twelfth or thirteenth alert, he finally gave up and threw himself down on the couch in the middle of the Hub with exhaustion. Instead of running off he looked up at Tosh dejectedly, his eyes watering with frustration. He wanted to stand up and hug her with gratitude when she spoke softly into the comms, but he was just too fucking tired to even attempt it.

"Owen, Gwen, there's one more alert. Can one or both of you check it out? Jack's still out trying to figure out what caused the last spike and it's only a little way away from where you both are."

She turned back towards him as soon as she gave them the rest of the information, standing up and coming to sit beside him on the couch. Jack had his head resting against the back of it with his eyes closed when he felt the cushion move beside him. He turned towards her and opened his eyes as she settled.

"Why don't you go talk to him Jack?"

The question was so unexpected that he had to struggle against the overwhelming confusion that was suddenly inundating him. He stared at Tosh for a full minute before he finally figured out what she was talking about. He shook his head and laid it back again before responding.

"I need some time to think through some things. Plus," he sighed softly as he rolled his head to face her again, "I think he needs some time away from the Hub and Torchwood."

She laughed lightly beside him and he sat up and narrowed his eyes. Just as he was about to stand up and stalk into his office she placed a hand on his arm and shook her head.

"Did you ask him if he needed that break or did you just tell him to take it?"

Jack leant forward, covering his hands with his face as he rested his elbows on his knees. It took him a moment to gather his composure. When he was finally sure he wasn't going to overreact he sat back again and looked towards her.

"You know, it's been a very long time since I've been in a relationship with anyone. I really don't think I'm ready for it. I know I screwed up, maybe even overreacted, but I didn't know what else to do. I still don't. I only know that I can't afford to take a step in that direction. There's way too much at stake."

Tosh arched her eyebrows at him, a soft smile playing at her lips as she listened to him speak. He knew that she had no clue as to what he was talking about, but he also knew that she wasn't going to ask him to elaborate. She stood up and held out her hand to help him up as well. When they were standing face to face she leant in and gave him a quick hug before speaking softly in his ear.

"You should talk to each other. Tell him exactly what you just told me Jack. See what he says."

As soon as Tosh released him she walked back to her workstation and pulled up the rift alert program. He heard her sigh softly as she turned back to look at him.

"It looks like it's finally settling down. I don't see anything else until tomorrow afternoon."

Jack sighed with relief and went to his office. He stood just inside the door for a minute before turning around and heading towards the lift, stepping onto it at the same time that Tosh flashed a smile at him.

"Why don't you all head home as soon as they get back? I can monitor for emergencies."

Tosh shook her head and pointed towards the ceiling, laughing as he furrowed his eyebrows at her.

"Don't worry about it Jack, just go. I'll hand out the mobile rift alerts and we'll take shifts until you tell us otherwise, or until the morning."

He flashed her a grateful look before reaching down and pressing the buttons on his vortex manipulator to start the lift. The moment he reached the Plass, he took off running for the garage, nearly scaring a little old lady when he appeared out of nowhere.

He was almost at Ianto's when he realised how hungry he was. Without thinking about it, he swung into a drive through and ordered some food, taking a guess at what he thought Ianto would want. When he reached Ianto's building he grabbed the food and ran up the stairs two at a time, stopping in front of the door. He was still breathing somewhat heavily when he reached forward and knocked softly.

When Ianto opened the door, Jack's eyes did a double take. Ianto was staring at him expectantly, his face dustier then Jack had ever seen it. The only things marring the total picture were tear streaks that had cut paths down his cheeks. He struggled for a moment, fighting against an overwhelming urge to pull Ianto into a hug before simply shoving the bag of food into his hands and sliding his way through the door. He made his way slowly to the middle of the room, vaguely noticing a mess of items scattered around and a few boxes labelled with Lisa's name on them before turning back towards Ianto to see him still standing in the doorway.

"I think we need to talk."

TBC

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_AN: Well, hopefully everyone got a few chuckles and enjoyed the chapter despite the lack of smut...lol. As always, comments and feedback are appreciated but not necessary if you don't want to leave any. I understand that sometimes it's just about enjoying the story! :)_


	40. Chapter 40 A Heart Won't Lie

_AN: Um, for right now I'll just thank Mama Rocks for the beta. The rest of my notes are gonna be at the end..._

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Chapter 40 - A Heart Won't Lie

Ianto smiled faintly as he shut the door and turned towards Jack. When he finally captured Jack's gaze he had to fight against the urge to laugh. It wasn't entirely helpful when Jack picked up an award that was sitting on his coffee table and arched his eyebrows as he read it. Jack put it back down and glanced at Ianto with an expression he'd never seen before. Before Ianto could say anything Jack smiled crookedly.

"I didn't know you could sing Ianto."

Ianto lost the battle and began to laugh wholeheartedly as he walked towards Jack and thrust the bag of food back into his hands.

"If you read that carefully Jack, you'll see that it's not exactly first place. In fact, it was so long ago that I'm sure whatever voice I had back then is long gone."

Jack chuckled loudly and shook his head as he walked over and dropped the bag onto Ianto's dining table. When he turned back around his laughter died down quickly and Ianto knew whatever he'd come over to say was going to be bad. Before Jack could start talking he walked past him, heading into his spare room. He heard Jack's footsteps behind him, indicating the other man was following him and sighed with resignation.

When he turned around, he found Jack leaning against the doorframe with his arms crossed, staring around at all the packages that filled the room. Jack's eyebrows rose again as he noticed the open boxes.

"Is there something I should know? Are you going somewhere?"

Ianto shook his head, offering Jack a frail smile before he spoke softly. There was more pain in his voice than he realised, but he was too distracted by what Jack was doing there to focus too much on it.

"I was just going through Lisa's things. Her family has been calling me for about four months to see if they could get some of it. At first, I just didn't know what she would want to keep when she came home. Afterwards, well, I just couldn't..." his voice trailed away when Jack nodded at him.

Ianto watched as Jack took a few steps forward, leaning over the box full of items he was planning on keeping. When he stood upright Ianto realised he was holding a black velvet jewellery box, staring at it suspiciously. Before Ianto could stop him, Jack flipped it open and gazed at the engagement ring nestled snugly inside. Jack snapped the ring box closed and dropped it back into the box without saying a word. He turned and walked out of the room never once meeting Ianto's worried eyes.

Ianto shuddered, frowning as he reached down to pick up his coffee cup and closed his eyelids. For a second he actually considered just sitting down and ignoring everything, but he knew that Jack would come back and drag him out of there. It took every bit of strength he had inside him to leave the room.

He found Jack in his kitchen, going through his cupboards sporadically as if he was looking for something. Jack finally stopped when he opened the cupboard full of plates and took two down, setting them carefully on the counter in front of him. When Jack didn't even look at Ianto he shook his head lightly, grimacing with frustration. He had no bloody idea what was going through the other man's mind, but in a way he was almost grateful for his silence.

'_Avoidance isn't going to solve anything..__.' _his mind added rather unhelpfully.

Ianto sighed heavily and walked past Jack until he reached his sink, turning on the water to wash his coffee cup. He took a few minutes longer to wash his hands and face, remembering how dusty everything he'd touched that day had been. Once he was sure he was clean he reached over and grabbed another mug for Jack. The moment he had it in his hand he finally heard Jack speak softly behind him.

"You were going to propose to her."

He bit his lip and turned back towards Jack, his heart thundering in his chest. He was surprised to see that Jack wasn't looking at him for an answer, instead he was staring down at the plates in front of him. He shrugged half heartedly, not caring if Jack could see it and turned back towards his coffee maker, pouring the liquid carefully into each cup. It took him a second to comprehend that Jack hadn't been asking him a question. Right as he realised that fact he turned back towards him to find the other man staring at him suspiciously.

"Why didn't you?"

Ianto glanced around the room, avoiding his gaze for as long as he could. Jack took a few steps forward, standing in front of him with an apprehensive look on his face. When he couldn't take anymore his eyes snapped back to Jack's as he growled with aggravation. He knew the other man wasn't going to leave him alone until he answered the question

"I didn't get a bloody chance, okay? I had reservations at a restaurant for the following Friday. Before I could take her and ask her, the God damn Cybermen came." Ianto snapped at him as he shoved Jack's coffee cup into his hand, not caring in the least if the hot liquid spilled over his skin.

He slid silently around Jack's body, grabbing the plates and setting them down on his table. When he turned around to grab some utensils, he found Jack right behind him, holding a fork out to Ianto. Jack's expression was more guarded than he'd ever seen before. It was the first time in quite a while that he wasn't able to tell what was running through the other man's mind. He turned away and dropped down into one of his chairs, reaching out to grab the bag of food. He filled up both their plates and pushed Jack's towards one of the other empty place settings at his table.

Jack sat down wordlessly in the chair and began to eat, glancing towards him every now and then. It took Ianto a while to realise that neither of them were actually eating that much food. Both he and Jack were pushing the food around the plates with their forks, silently. After twenty minutes of quiet broken only by the sound of metal scraping against glass plates and audible swallows of coffee he couldn't take it anymore. He pushed his barely touched food away and glanced towards Jack.

"What are you doing here Jack? You said we needed to talk, but you haven't exactly said a whole lot otherwise. I'm all for trying to read your mind or helping you see something if you're stressed, but I really thought that you wanted us to take a few days _**away**_ from one another."

Jack sighed, pushing his plate out of the way as well, before dropping his face in his palms. Just as Ianto was about to reach out towards him, he sat up straight and looked directly at him. Ianto stared at him expectantly, crossing his arms almost defensively. When he realised what position he was in, he uncrossed them and placed his hands flat on the table in front of him.

"Well?" he said, nearly grimacing when he realised how belligerent he sounded.

If it had been under any other circumstance, Ianto would have found the idea that Jack was speechless almost amusing. However, at the moment he couldn't find any hilarity in the situation, even when Jack opened and closed his mouth several times. After nearly a minute of silence Jack reached out to take his hand but he pulled it back before the other man could grasp it. He wasn't about to let down any of his defences until he knew exactly what was on Jacks' mind.

"Ianto, I'm sorry for leaving you the way I did this morning. I was just a little shocked. I wasn't expecting...that."

Jack's voice was nearly a whisper by the time he finished speaking. Ianto stood up and walked back into his kitchen, facing the wall as he leaned heavily on the counter in front of him.

"Jack, did it ever occur to you that I had no idea what I was saying? I mean, we have discussed this before. A lot of things are said during the heat of a moment without realising it." Ianto paused, turning back to face Jack with his eyebrows raised in question, then continued, "Did that occur to you at all?"

Jack was shaking his head negatively before Ianto had even finished speaking. It wasn't until Jack stood up and walked over to him that he realised Jack wasn't actually answering his question. The look on Jack's face told him he was well aware that Ianto had been more cognizant than he was trying to pretend he'd been.

"Ianto, do you think I'm blind? I've seen something more when you look at me sometimes. The problem is, your emotions are snarled up inside of you. You have yet to take time and think about the things that have happened to you, I 'm not sure if you even realise that."

Ianto stood up straighter, glaring at Jack with frustration. When Jack gestured towards the living room he felt a thread of confusion run through him. It was only when he realised that Jack was indicating the boxes that Ianto finally understood what he was trying to get at.

"Look at how long it's taken you to even start getting rid of her things Ianto!" Jack said with aggravation coating his voice, "You kept it all because you were still trying to find a way to get her back. Even after you knew she was gone for good."

Ianto shook his head, his eyes narrowing with anger. If he didn't know any better he would almost swear that Jack was just trying to piss him off even more. Jack walked over to him, raising his hand tentatively and brushing the back of his fingers over Ianto's cheek. It calmed him down almost immediately, until Jack cupped his cheek in his palm and spoke softly.

"I shot her in the heart Ianto. Gwen, Tosh, and Owen, they all fired their guns too, but I was the first one to pull the trigger. A part of you still hasn't faced that yet."

Ianto snorted as he pulled away from Jack, stalking past him and towards the living room. He lost steam about halfway there and dropped heavily back into his chair. Something about Jack's words bothered him more than he wanted to admit. In many ways, he really hadn't been paying that much attention to what he was saying that morning. He was almost willing to admit that there might be more to his half arsed admission of love, but he really didn't want to revisit Lisa's death any more than he had to. He'd faced it once already and that was enough.

Ianto pulled his plate back in front of him, taking another bite. He grimaced when he had to force himself to swallow it. As a diversionary tactic, he knew he'd failed when he began to cough. Jack hit him gently on his back a few times and he turned towards him with a scowl.

"I'm not a child Jack, but thanks." he said hoarsely.

Jack chuckled and sat down next to him. This time when he reached for Ianto's hand, he allowed the other man to take it. Ianto closed his eyes when Jack twined their fingers together, drawing in a deep breath of air before opening them back up. As soon as he was sure his temper was under better control he captured Jack's gaze, stunned by the intensity that was directed at him. He growled softly before he could stop himself, gripping Jack's hand tighter as he spoke.

"You're right! Okay?" he said with aggravation coating every word.

Jack's eyebrows shot up at his words as he shook his head. Ianto ignored his reaction, softening his voice when he continued.

"Sometimes I look at you Jack and all I can think about is the fact that you _**ordered**_ me to go kill someone I loved. Even though a lot of my memories of that night are hazy, there are a few things that I remember with absolute clarity. Lisa was dead the moment I walked back into that room. I don't care if her brain had supposedly been transferred. You shot Annie...not Lisa."

Jack narrowed his eyes, staring at Ianto. Just as he opened his mouth to say something, perhaps deny what Ianto was unwillingly facing, he spoke again.

"I'm not finished Jack."

Jack's mouth snapped closed so fast that Ianto literally heard his teeth clash together. Ianto smiled weakly and reached out his free hand to turn Jack's gaze back to him. He knew that Jack kept insisting that he needed to face what happened, but there were still things that he knew the older man was denying as well.

"Otherwise Jack, there are times I think that I _**could**_ fall in love with you, that I may even be most of the way there. But so much is still wrapped up between that night and how much I _**hated**_ you for not even pretending to be remotely human, that I have a hard time even accepting that it's possible. So I have to ask, how could I love you when I know that you've forgotten what it's like to be human? That you can't reciprocate because you may as well not even be alive for all the chances you refuse to take?"

Jack sighed, pulling his hand away from Ianto's so he could drop his face back into his palms again. Ianto drew his own together clasping them in front of him on the table as he studied Jack's posture, well aware that he'd pressed a sore point for the other man. When Jack finally looked back up, Ianto saw so much hurt and resentment reflected in his eyes that he glanced away.

"So you're saying what I'm thinking. That we should back off and that we might be getting drawn in too deep?" Jack said with sadness tingeing his voice.

Ianto snorted again, shaking his head as he glared at Jack. It took Ianto a minute to realise that, either Jack didn't realise how much of his emotions were coming out in his voice, or he did and was refusing to acknowledge it.

"Jack, I don't need this drama. You know that better than anyone. Not to be crass, but the only thing you ever wanted from me was a fuck buddy. Now you think you got more than you bargained for. You want to do this because you don't want to deal with any feelings that _**you**_ might or might nothave."

Jack shook his head and reached for Ianto's clasped hands, gripping both of them between his own. When Ianto stared down at them, they moved up gripping his chin and forcing his gaze back to Jack's face.

"Ianto, I care about you. I _**really**_ do. I never thought of you as a fuck buddy, no matter what you may think. You are more than I ever expected. You surprise me continually, never doing or saying quite what I'd expect. Sometimes I do think that I could fall in love with you. However, we both know I'm...well, that I'm not ready to take that step. I can't afford to let you in the way you deserve."

Ianto's eyes opened wide at Jack's words, his mouth dropping open in shock. He closed his mouth quickly, drawing it into a thin tense line when fury began to course through him. With a harsh growl he yanked backwards away from Jack's hands and glared angrily at him.

"You can't do that Jack! You can't tell me one second that we should back off and then say you could love me! That's just fucking wrong! Why the bloody hell do you always do shite like that?"

Jack stood up from his chair and began to pace silently across Ianto's small kitchen. He avoided Ianto's livid gaze for so long, that the young man was seriously thinking of standing up and forcing him to sit back down. Just as he made the move to rise Jack turned back towards him, his face was a mask of regret.

"Ianto, I'm sorry. I try to...to keep those feelings reigned in. I really do...but sometimes..."

Ianto growled and stood up. He moved quickly, his hands coming down angrily on either side of Jack's body, trapping him against the counter so he couldn't move. When he spoke his words were coated with all of the anger and aggravation that was running through his body.

"Don't you bloody dare! I'm fucking British Jack, so don't even try to talk to me about withholding emotions! We're the God damn definition!"

* * *

For a split second, when Ianto had trapped him against the counter, Jack felt every bit of blood in his body rush south, hardening his cock almost painfully. Ianto hadn't been this forceful with him since he'd thrown him against the wall of reception and began to kiss him senseless. However, when Ianto's words finally penetrated the rampaging lust that was inundating him he actually began to chuckle. Before he could stop himself, he was laughing harder then he could ever remember

Without focussing on what he was doing, he wrapped his arms around Ianto's waist and pulled their bodies tightly together. Nestling his face in the crook of his neck, he inhaled deeply, letting the smell and feel of Ianto wash through his senses. If he was sure of anything right now, it was that he wasn't going to have a chance to luxuriate again in these sensations for a _**long**_ time. Everything inside of him told him that they needed a break from one another before they got in too deep...before _**he**_ got in too deep.

When Ianto tried to pull away from him he gripped him tighter, holding him so close that he wasn't sure where his own body ended and the other man's began. Over the many years of his life, he'd had a few instances where, had he had the ability, he would crystallize the moment. Several of those times had happened with the young man he now held in his arms. Even now with his eyes closed while he held onto Ianto so tight he wasn't sure if he could breathe, those memories flashed before him.

First there was the night he'd met Ianto. He could remember the way that arousal had flooded through his entire body at the sight of this Welshman dressed in blue jeans holding his hand out casually as he introduced himself. It had taken every bit of control he owned not to give in to the temptation that was standing before him. Instead of reaching out and grabbing Ianto, his shaking hands and sweaty palms had thrown the unconscious weevil over his shoulder before he sauntered away, completely aware of the way the young man was staring after him lustfully.

Then the next morning on the pier he'd come to an abrupt halt when he saw Ianto standing in front of him holding out that God damn cup as if it were filled with liquid gold. For some odd reason, he'd taken that cup and drank from it without even hesitating. Considering he'd already known Ianto worked for Torchwood One at that point, he was still amazed he trusted the young man enough to drink anything that he offered. Jack remembered they way Ianto's eyes had lit up in pleasure at his response and how lust had again tried to overwhelm him. It hadn't been remotely helpful when he tried to escape and Ianto'd placed his palm flat against Jack's chest, sending another jolt of desire straight to his cock. With the calculating aroused look Ianto had thrown him, he could've sworn the other man was trying to find a place to shove him so he could have more access to the rest of his body.

And dear Lord, Jack had never seen anything as luscious as Ianto standing in the rain wearing a three piece suit. When he thought back on that night he was honestly astonished that he'd had as much control as he'd shown. First while yelling at Ianto and just knowing by his expression that the young man was thinking of shoving him against the front of the truck, and then when Ianto had actually caught him as Myfanwy dropped him. Ianto had every chance to get out of the way, but instead he'd braced his legs and held out his arms when Jack had dropped right on top of him. The feel of Ianto's body underneath him was enough to leave him nearly breathless as they both rolled away from the falling creature and chuckled. God how he wanted to take what Ianto was almost unknowingly offering him! He'd even tilted his chin up in invitation.

The memories came faster and clearer with every moment he'd wanted to hold onto. There was the night he'd first approached Ianto in the archives and left him practically panting with need in front of the desk, the night he'd finally been able to break through Ianto's facade and get a reaction worthy of a response, the way Ianto had lost control simply by sharing their first kiss, and the first time he'd meant to take Ianto, to sate the God damn lust he felt every time he got around the young man, yet ended up making love to him instead. He wanted to hold onto all of it, keep each special memory locked away in a vault in his mind that he could open and peruse through any time he needed them.

However, he knew that it just wasn't possible.

Experience over his long life time had taught him that the more he tried to hold on to something, the faster it slipped out of his grasp. The next time Ianto tried to pull back, he reluctantly let him. He was only mildly surprised when Ianto's head tilted to the side, his eyes intense as he tried to read Jack's expression. Jack did his best to distract Ianto, grinning and wiggling his eyebrows almost comically at the same time. At this point he was willing to try anything to get Ianto to believe that he wasn't finding this nearly as hard as it was.

After a minute, Ianto chuckled under his breath and shook his head lightly, a soft smile playing about his lips as he closed his eyes slowly. Jack took the time to study Ianto's face, trying to memorize every nuance while he could. His eyes drank in the sight of Ianto's smooth skin and the way the hard planes of his cheeks shifted into his soft lips. He brought one of his hands up and traced the soft dip in Ianto's nose, fighting against the urge to run his fingertips along his jaw. When Ianto chuckled again and opened his eyes he could tell the other man had known exactly what he was doing.

He didn't allow his embarrassment to show as he silently ducked and slid under Ianto's arm, moving over so he could drop back into the chair he'd vacated earlier. He heard Ianto sigh behind him and turned towards the young man, gesturing for him to sit down.

Ianto ignored his motions and grabbed the plates off the table instead, taking them over and cleaning them. Once he'd rinsed them off and placed them in the sink he turned back to Jack with a hint of surprise. It took Jack a minute to figure out that Ianto wasn't expecting him to stay there.

'_Did he honestly think I was __just gonna slip out the door while he wasn't looking?'_ he thought with astonishment.

When Ianto kept staring at him he gestured again for Ianto to sit down. He really didn't want to finish this conversation across the room from him. Even if he had to give up Ianto, he wanted to absorb everything he could while he had the chance. Ianto took the invitation this time, sinking down in the chair with a quiet sigh as Jack drew in a deep breath of air and released it slowly. When he was sure he had his emotions under better control, he reached across the table and captured both of Ianto's hands within his own.

"Ianto if we...if all of this follows through, I'd like to think that we could handle it with aplomb. I just don't think we should allow ourselves to get too wrapped up in each other. There's so much that you still don't know about me. That night we talked about my life, I told you a lot of things that no one else that hadn't lived through it with me has heard about. And as much as I'd like for you to trust me, you knew I was leaving quite a bit of information out didn't you?"

He turned to look at Ianto for confirmation of his question, sighing when he saw the young man nod almost imperceptibly. Ianto's face took on a contemplative look and he knew he was gearing up to ask him more questions. Instead of following that trail of the conversation further, Jack changed the subject.

"You still don't believe that I can't die, do you?"

Ianto snorted almost belligerently and turned away from Jack before he could see his expression again. Just as Jack was about to start talking he heard Ianto begin to whisper.

"Jack, we see a lot of astounding things every day, but for some reason you not being able to die just seems implausible. It's just makes more sense to see that you've travelled throughout that time as a Time Agent and that's how you have all the knowledge of it. I know you, I've touched every part of your body in ways that I never even knew were possible. You're every bit flesh and blood as I am. How the bloody hell do you expect me to believe that you can't die and have lived for over a hundred and fifty years when I've spent so much time finding out exactly how human you actually are?"

Ianto gripped his hands tighter and Jack knew it was so that he wouldn't pull away. It didn't stop a thread of anger running through him though. After all, Ianto was all but indicating that he was lying. He saw Ianto shake his head lightly and Jack found himself scowling in response. He was wholly unprepared to see Ianto smile weakly as he spoke again with confusion coating his words.

"What's really weird is that I know you're telling the truth. If I look back I'm sure I could even find proof. Hell, the night I met you in the forest I could've sworn that bloody weevil got you. But then why didn't I see anything on your neck _**but**_ blood? I've _**seen**_ you with injuries Jack. After Lisa died you had stitches, you were bruised. You didn't heal any faster than the rest of us. So how can I believe you can't die if you can get injured?"

Jack chuckled almost reverently as he stared at Ianto with speculation and amazement before shaking himself lightly. Somehow Ianto managed to pay attention to things that no one else would have caught. Ianto was too God damn perceptive and he really wished he had some answers for him.

"Ianto, the reason that I can't allow us to get more involved is because I'm searching for the answers to those very questions. I _**need**_ to know if I'm ever going to live a normal life."

He was surprised again when Ianto suddenly burst out laughing. Ianto bit his lip in an obvious attempt to quell it, but Jack could tell it wasn't working. He smiled at Ianto, waiting to see what it was that had set the him off.

"I've told you once Jack, you are anything but _**normal**_, no matter if you can die or not."

Jack pulled his hands away from Ianto's and covered his face again to hide his smile. He knew it wouldn't help matters if he focussed on how much enjoyment Ianto brought into his life. There was just so much about Ianto that he was going to regret losing when he walked away.

And he _**would**_ walk away.

He needed answers and there were absolutely no options left anymore. If he stayed on this path, he would only end up ignoring the Doctor when their timelines _**did**_ finally cross. He would lose out on his only possibility to live normally. If he could live a _**normal**_ life he wouldn't have to worry about situations like these anymore. He had to know if he could take some of those chances that Ianto had so blatantly pointed out that he avoided. He dropped his hands from his face, cradling his chin in his palms as he smiled at Ianto, trying to hide the pain that was ripping through him.

He knew it didn't work when Ianto's gaze instantly shifted away. Jack sighed, his smile leaving his face as quickly as it had appeared. When he reached over to run his fingers through Ianto's hair, the young man moved forward away from his questing hand and grabbed his coffee cup, cradling it in his palms and blowing on the liquid. Considering how little there was left in the mug and how long it'd been sitting there, it was easy for Jack to figure out that Ianto was just trying to avoid his touch.

"Ianto, I just...from my experience I know that if we stay on the path we're on, you'll only end up resenting me. I'd rather keep you in my life as a friend and a member of my team than have you hate me. It's better for you to try to live a normal life than stick with someone whose only goal right now is to get answers to questions I might never have the chance to ask..."

Jack's voice trailed away when Ianto growled and abruptly shot to his feet. He had no idea what he'd said to upset Ianto so greatly so he watched silently as the young man grabbed Jacks empty cup with his own and walked over to the sink. While Ianto was washing both mugs, he could have sworn he heard the him grumbling under his breath, but the sound of the running water drowned out his words.

He turned and sat sideways in his chair, his arm resting along the back as Ianto turned off the taps. Trying not to be too obvious about what he was doing, he leant forward in a somewhat feeble attempt to hear what Ianto was muttering when he moved closer to refill the coffee mugs. Without the sound of the water to drown it out he was actually able to overhear a few words that almost sounded like "_Jack Bloody Harkness_" and "_self righteous bastard_" before Ianto turned back towards him.

Jack sat up straight, tilting his head in confusion as he stared at Ianto. He still had no fucking clue as to what he'd said to upset him so badly, but it was quite obvious that Ianto had no qualms about letting Jack know what he thought about him. When Ianto glared towards him he saw the young man's lower lip thrust out invitingly in what he could only describe as a pout. It was so God damn sexy that he practically had to wage an internal war against his self control that was demanding he just fucking take everything that Ianto offered him. That small thrust of Ianto's lower lip made him want to forget everything...forget leaving...forget what was best for Ianto...

Forget the Doctor.

He arched his eyebrows in question and Ianto dropped the now full mugs back onto the counter, spilling half the hot liquid over the surface in the process. Ianto stalked over to Jack leaning over until he was practically nose to nose with him.

"Jack, why the bloody hell do you always _**assume**_ you know what's best for me? Outside of Torchwood, when did I ever give you authority to make decisions about my life? How about just once, _**just for the novelty of it,**_ letting _**me**_ determine what I _**might or might not**_ need?"

Jack's mouth opened and closed several times as he tried to think of a way to defend himself.

"Yan...I never assumed..."

Ianto scowled at him getting even closer until their noses were actually touching before speaking with a low growl. Jack bit his lower lip, trying not to stare at Ianto's icy blue gaze. He pulled back slightly only to focus his gaze on Ianto's lips, watching the way they curved as they shaped around his next words.

"No Jack, you've said your piece. Now it's time for you to listen to mine. Just because you've arsed about for years and ballsed up your life doesn't give you the right to make decisions for me. You are so obviously wrapped up in a few truths you **_may _**never know, that you've taken to trying to rule everyone around you. Who exactly died and made you the bloody king?"

Jack knew he was gaping at Ianto like he'd never met him before, but he was having a hard time trying to figure out who the young man in front of him actually was. When he continued to stare, realising he hadn't made another attempt to answer any of Ianto's questions, the other man pulled him out of his chair and started to drag him into the living room. He dug his heels in the best he could and grabbed the wall, halting their progress. Ianto turned back towards him with narrowed eyes, shifting his gaze away when Jack leant forward to study him more closely.

"I'm not trying to drag you to the fucking bedroom Jack! You've made it _**abundantly**_ clear that you want out of that part of my life. So you've bloody well got what you want. You're out of my bedroom and my personal life. I work for you and that is where any relationship we have _**ends**_. You have exactly what you want."

When Jack once again failed to find anything to say, Ianto took a step back and curled his lips in distaste. If Jack had never gotten as close to Ianto as he'd been, he wouldn't have known what to make of this angry man before him. As it was, despite everything he'd been through with Ianto, he was having a hard time associating him with the same man who'd opened the door with dusty tear streaks on his face. He hadn't expected Ianto to be so fucking cold and distant. What he'd hoped was that Ianto would agree that they needed time away from one another.

Jack started to step forward and almost growled in frustration when Ianto moved away. When he glanced towards Ianto's face, he saw the young man looking at him almost apathetically. His eyes were focussed on the wall over Jack's shoulder.

"Do you feel better now _**Sir**_?"

Ianto spoke slowly, putting more emphasis and formality on the word sir than Jack had ever heard. He stood there for a few moments trying to capture Ianto's gaze again before finally giving up and closing his own eyes. If anything, he felt more like he was losing the other half of his soul. It certainly didn't feel good, even if he had instigated the whole thing for all the right reasons.

"What are you going to do? Are you planning on..."

He tried to hide the pain that was suddenly ripping throughout him, but it was clearly evident in his voice. Ianto didn't give him a chance to make any more excuses or even finish what he was trying to say. Instead he gestured towards his front door. Jack turned towards it, his body completely rigid. If Ianto was going to cut him out completely simply because he felt they needed time apart, he wasn't going to fight him. Especially since a deeper part of Jack's mind knew that Ianto had every right to shun him this way.

"I'll see you at work on Friday, Sir."

Jack froze, quickly turning around to stare at Ianto when he heard his voice crack. If he'd been any slower in reacting he would have missed seeing the horrified look on Ianto's face from the corner of his eye. It was only _**then**_ that he realised how much effort Ianto was putting into not showing Jack exactly what he was going through.

He hesitated for a second, then walked back towards Ianto, stopping right in front of him. Ianto was still gazing silently at the wall so Jack reached up and turned his face towards his own. Just before he could capture Ianto's gaze, the young man quickly closed his eyes. Instead of dissuading him, Jack leant forward and brushed a soft kiss across Ianto's lips, lingering for as long as he could possibly get away with. When he pulled away, Ianto's eyes were still tightly closed. The only noticeable difference that Jack could ascertain was the fact that he was breathing deeply in and out. Ianto didn't so much as flinch when he reached up and ran the back of his fingers along his cheek as he spoke in a whisper.

"I'm so sorry for all of this Ianto. I _**really**_ do wish I had the answers already."

Jack saw Ianto's jaw clench in response to his words before he turned and strode out of the loft, shutting the door softly behind him. He stood on the doorstep for a long time afterwards, holding his hand against the rough wood. For a split second he remembered when he'd done the very same thing and bit his lip when he realised how different the situation was. The last time he'd left and paused here, he knew he'd be back. This time however, he heard the lock slide into place on the other side.

That sound combined with the realisation that Ianto was on the other side of the door, barring him from re-entering was enough to drive the enormity of the situation straight through him all at once. Before he knew it, he was leaning with his back against the door, sliding down to bury his head in hands as he fought against tears that threatened to fall. He couldn't stop the sobs that were escaping his throat every time he breathed heavily in and out.

He stood up quickly when a warm tear escaped and trailed down his cheek. If he was going to fall apart, it wasn't going to be in the middle of a fucking hallway. Just as he reached the stairwell he turned towards Ianto's loft, his voice hoarse with emotion as he whispered softly.

"No Ianto...I don't feel better. I'm not sure I ever will."

* * *

Ianto sat silently, listening to see if Jack would leave or try to get back in. Within minutes of Jack walking out, he'd angrily thrown the lock closed on his door. He'd thought Jack was long gone, only realising a moment later that he was standing silently outside of his door. The idea that Jack might be lingering because he was regretting his actions had dispelled his anger and practically caused his legs to collapse out from under him, leaving him where he was now propped up against his door.

After what seemed like forever, he heard Jack leaning against the door heavily as he sat down on the other side. The door was thick, but not nearly enough to hide the gasping sobbing breaths that were coming from the other man. He had to struggle against every fibre in his body not to stand up and throw open the door. A second later, he heard Jack stand up and leave, but he stayed where he was, not bothering to fight the tears that were beginning to slowly fall down his cheeks.

END

* * *

_AN: Yes, I know, it's probably not what a lot of folks expected. To be honest, I had no idea this is where it was gonna go until it was __already written out. I was just as surprised and shocked as a few of you are. I was actually crying by the end so I know it's very __**very**__ sad and angsty. _

_Now for good news! :)_

_I have already started on a sequel called Entropy and a surprise short story that takes place between Anticipation and Entropy. I'm about half done with the short story and about a third the way through the first chapter of the sequel. So you guys shouldn't have to wait too long for the next segment. I know this story didn't end on a happy note but it will get better in the sequel...I promise. :)_

_I appreciate everyone who stuck with this story from its start and everyone who came in along the way who was kind enough to tell me how much they liked it. __Mama Rocks has been a god send for sticking with me for over a year and always helping Anticipation to be at its best before it was posted. I am eternally grateful for all the work and time she put in to make it good for both me and all of you who have read it. I haven't wanted to finish a fanfic in a long time and this one really is one of my favourites. I'm so glad to have found the Torchwood fandom and all the kind people who have supported me. _

_Thank you all so much! :)_


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